The Unforgettable Wolf

by Jane Godman

  “One, two...all.” He cast her a sidelong glance, checking her reaction to the shocking information.

  Violet choked slightly on her drink. “At once?”

  “That would be the ultimate dream. It’s well-known on the groupie network that the guys in Beast like to share.”

  Violet digested that information. There was no doubt was Rick was serious. Was that what Nate did? Shared girls with his bandmates? A hollow feeling hit her low in the stomach. Was that part of his plan for her? Was the sweet-as-honey kiss they had shared earlier intended to warm her up prior to the main act?

  As if on cue, a hand slid around her waist and Torque pressed his warm lips to her bare shoulder.

  “Angel, you look good enough to eat.”

  As she skittered out of his hold, Violet realized that the three women at Khan’s feet were now naked. He was lying back on his beanbag with his hands behind his head, while one of them bent her head over his groin. Although Violet’s view was impaired, it was clear what was going on. When she twisted her head in the opposite direction, she saw Dev in an embrace with another groupie, his hands roaming under her clothing.

  “I have to get out of here.”

  Ignoring Rick’s look of surprise, she slammed her drink down on the bar and ran out of the room. Once she was in the corridor, she couldn’t remember the way, but she decided she would have to stumble on an exit sooner or later. Anything was better than staying in the scene of debauchery she had just left. Bitter disappointment welled up inside her. Nate was her knight in shining armor, but she had just discovered he might have plans to share his damsel in distress with four other guys.

  Gradually it dawned on her that she was becoming lost in a maze of narrow corridors. She seemed to have found her way below the giant stadium and was in some sort of maintenance area. The walls were bare brick, the floor concrete, and the overhead lighting created a gloomy atmosphere. Violet was about to turn back when she became aware of movement on a ledge just above her. As she turned to look, a large black-and-white cat arched its back and hissed at her.

  The animal, with nowhere to go, was clearly afraid of something. Violet, very aware of sharp claws in line with her face, took a step back just as a man in a janitor’s uniform emerged from a nearby room.

  “Ah, mademoiselle. Do not be afraid of le gros chat. What do you say? The cat who is fat?” His English, although heavily accented, was very good. “She is too lazy to hurt anyone.”

  Violet eyed the cat warily. It didn’t look lazy. It looked terrified. As the man approached and reached for the animal, it lashed out at him, scratching his arm. He muttered under his breath, and the cat jumped to the floor. Backing against the wall as though trying to blend into the bricks, it hissed at Violet again.

  “How strange.” The man regarded the cat’s behavior in surprise. “She is an old lady. Once she caught mice. Now all she does is sleep and eat the food I bring her.” He turned to Violet. “Why are you here, mademoiselle?”

  “I got lost. Can you show me the way to the exit?” She would worry about what she did next once she got outside.

  “But of course.” He beckoned for her to follow him.

  As he passed the cat, it remained in place. As Violet made a move toward it, the animal let out an agonized yowl and ran in the opposite direction. It’s me. The realization hit Violet as she watched the creature’s retreating form. The cat was afraid of her. The thought jolted her. I scared that placid, old cat just with my presence. It seemed to be confirmation of her suspicion that she was a werewolf.

  As they made their way to the next level and rounded a corner, Nate was coming toward them. His face was drawn with worry and, when he saw her, he hurried to Violet’s side. The janitor, obviously feeling his services were no longer required, walked back the way they had come.

  Nate reached out as though to grip her upper arms, but Violet took a step back. “Where did you go? I’ve been out of my mind with worry.” His voice certainly sounded concerned.

  The temptation to melt into his arms was overwhelming, but she needed to know what came next if she did. “I saw what was going on in the green room with Khan and his groupies. Rick said you all share your girls.”

  A range of emotions crossed Nate’s face. Starting with incredulity, it passed through confusion and settled on rage.

  “Rick said that, did he?” His lips tightened. “Come with me.” He made no further attempt to touch her, merely turning on his heel and marching in what she now recognized as the direction of the green room.

  “I’m not going back in there.”

  “I’m not asking you to.” His features softened slightly. “Although things have calmed down and I’m sorry you saw what you did. Khan was out of order. Apparently Ged walked in minutes after you left and restored order.” He drew a deep breath. “Wait here. Please?”

  Violet found something out in that moment. She found out how hard it was for her to say no to him. She drew the line at being passed around among his friends, but there was very little else she could refuse him. When she nodded, some of the tension left his frame, and Nate went into the green room. When he emerged a minute or two later, he was accompanied by Rick.

  “Tell her.” Nate’s voice was close to a growl.

  Rick looked shame-faced. “When I said the guys in the band share their girls, I should have made it clear that Nate doesn’t do that.”

  “And the rest.” Nate kept his eyes on Violet’s face as he spoke.

  The big security guy looked like a little boy caught in an act of misbehavior. “He never has done that. And he doesn’t go with groupies.” Rick swallowed hard. “You can ask anyone connected to the band. They’ll all tell you the same thing.”

  Violet felt like a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Rick could have been saying those things out of loyalty to Nate, or to keep his job, of course. Something in Nate’s expression told her that wasn’t the case. He looked like he desperately needed her to believe this. She could sense the emotion coming off him in waves. It was incredible how in tune she had become with his moods in the short time she had known him.

  “I believe you.” As she said the words, a relieved Rick took the opportunity to try to sidle away.

  “Wait right there.” Nate barked out the words. “It’s your job to get us past the press in a few minutes.” His voice was softer when he spoke to Violet. “So we’re okay?”

  She smiled. “If it wasn’t the truth, why would you go take the time to convince the troublesome girl you found in a forest? For a lot less bother, you could just go in there and have your pick of those groupies.”

  His expression was unreadable as he gazed down at her. “Why indeed?”

  Chapter 7

  Getting past the waiting fans and press proved to be a nightmare. Rick had a car waiting in the underground parking space below the stadium, but, when Nate and Violet arrived, the security guard was regarding the vehicle with displeasure.

  “This is not what I asked for.” He pointed to the windows. “They’re not blacked out. Ged won’t be happy if the paparazzi get shots of you with Violet.”

  Nate shrugged. “We’re not waiting around while you get another car.”

  “We could put my jacket over Violet’s head,” Rick said with a hopeful light in his eyes.

  Nate glared at him. “Just drive.”

  “Won’t Ged be angry with you for leaving the party early?” Violet asked as they got into the back of the car.

  “Right now, he’s too pissed off with Khan for starting the tour off on the wrong foot to even notice what I’m doing.” He took her hand. “When I said those parties get wild, you have to believe that was not what I meant. Even Khan has never gone that far before.”

  “Is he determined to be the wildest man in rock?”

  “Despite all the posturing, there’s a lot more to Khan
than that.” Nate couldn’t hide the sadness in his voice. Of all of them, Khan was probably the most damaged. When he considered what they’d been through—Nate included—that was saying something. Before dark thoughts of the past could overwhelm him, they were exiting an underground tunnel and all hell broke loose around them.

  Camera flashes went off like explosions, and Nate instinctively reached for Violet, turning her face into his shoulder. He could hear the fans chanting his name as they clustered around the car, banging on the windows and pressing their faces to the glass. The sign of the beast was all around him, and while he should have been flattered, the car was beginning to rock alarmingly. Rick was unable to move the vehicle forward even an inch through the throng.

  “Get on your phone to the police. They’ll have to escort us out of this,” Nate said.

  Rick followed his instructions, speaking in a combination of English and French that seemed to get his message across. A few minutes later, sirens were heard, and before long, the crowd parted, as police motorcycles cleared a path, allowing Rick to drive through. The officers stayed with them until they were clear of the waiting fans. It was only when Rick took the route back to the hotel that Nate breathed a sigh of relief. The fans were the reason for their success, and he appreciated them, but moments like that were scary.

  When they reached their suite, Nate didn’t bother with the lights. There was enough illumination from the streetlamps outside for them to see, and all he wanted to see was Violet. Back at the stadium, when he believed he had lost her... He ran a hand through his hair. She isn’t mine to lose. The thought was killing him.

  “I would never hurt you.” She had seen him decapitate a werewolf, but he wouldn’t harm a hair on her head. He would lay down his life to protect her. “You have to believe that.”

  Her smile tugged at that point in his chest. The place that had been cold and shriveled for so long. Until she had come along and breathed new life into him. “Don’t you understand? It wasn’t just about being afraid.” She stepped closer to him, enveloping him in her delicate scent. “I was jealous.”

  She couldn’t have delivered a more erotically charged force if she’d touched him intimately. He was instantly hard, achingly aroused, needing to hold her. But this was dangerous territory. Nate knew it even if Violet didn’t. She had no idea who she was. What her past might be, what her relationships were. She had placed herself in his hands and in his power. Her trust in him was absolute. What sort of lowlife would take advantage of that? The invitation in her shining eyes was unmistakable, and, if it was repeated when her memory returned...well, that would be the most wonderful moment of Nate’s life. But right now she was at her most vulnerable. When he had kissed her back at the stadium, he had acted on impulse. The most wonderful, never-to-be-repeated impulse of his life. He had to resist the overwhelming temptation to do it—and more—again.

  Ignoring his supercharged senses with an effort, Nate moved to the minibar fridge, gesturing to Violet to see if she wanted anything. Even in the half-light, he could see the hurt and confusion in her eyes at his apparent rejection of her shy advance as she shook her head. Steeling himself to ignore her pain, he took out a bottle of water and drained half of it in one gulp.

  “Beast is back on the road tomorrow. We should get some sleep.”

  Violet nodded, moving slowly toward her room. When she reached the door, she turned back. She was framed with the darkness behind her. God, she looked so beautiful in that white lace blouse, the creamy flesh of her shoulders exposed and her black hair tumbling around them.

  “Can I ask you something?” Her voice was husky.

  “Always.”

  “Why don’t you join in with the others?” It was hard to see in the gloomy light, but he sensed she was blushing. “With the groupies and the sharing? If it’s what your friends do, why do you keep yourself apart from it?”

  He felt his throat tighten. How could he begin to tell that story? A story that started six years ago and not only destroyed a young man’s dreams but also his ability to have any sort of normal relationship. How could he tell another person that, when he was attacked, he was a virgin? That, since the attack, every time he thought about sex, he couldn’t get hard unless his fantasies included a woman who was half wolf? That the only time he’d tried to have sex with a woman—one of those eager, grasping groupies—he hadn’t been able to get it up and she’d laughed at him? That he was terrified this soul-destroying attraction to Violet might be because deep down he suspected she was a werewolf?

  He bowed his head in an attempt to hide his eyes and with them his shameful, tangled thoughts. “I just never have.”

  She remained in the doorway for a moment or two, then he heard her exhale. It was a soft sigh. A sound of regret and missed opportunity that almost brought him to his knees. “Good night, Nate. Sleep well.”

  She closed the door behind her.

  Sleep? She had to be fucking joking.

  * * *

  Violet woke with a start, sitting up abruptly, her heart pounding wildly. What was that awful noise? It came again, and she identified its source. It was coming from Nate’s room. The sound of a creature in torment, it was a piercing, guttural cry. Not quite the howl of an animal, but not exactly human. In between the cries, she could hear a man’s voice. Although the words he was saying were indistinct, it sounded like he was exhorting someone or something to leave him alone.

  She hurried out of bed and across the sitting room that separated her room from Nate’s. When she entered his room, he was lying curled in the middle of the bed in a fetal position with his arms protectively raised over his head. He had left the drapes open, and she could see he was naked. The bedding lay in a heap on the floor as though he had kicked it aside. As Violet approached him, Nate let out another agonized wail.

  “Get out of my head, you werewolf bastard.” The pain in his voice brought tears to her eyes.

  “Nate?” Tentatively, she reached out a hand to touch his shoulder.

  She had a scant second to register that his flesh felt like it was on fire, even though his body was bathed in sweat, before Nate flung away from her. Hurling himself from the bed, he threw himself into the corner of the room, bringing his knees up under his chin. Cowering there, he gazed around with wide, unseeing eyes. His breath was coming in uneven gasps, and his lips were drawn back in a snarl. Violet was fairly sure he hadn’t regained consciousness.

  She knelt in front of him. “Nate, it’s me. It’s Violet.”

  He gave a shuddering sigh and his eyelids fluttered. “Violet?”

  “You were dreaming.” She gave a shaky laugh. “Well, a nightmare to be exact. A bad one.”

  Nate scrubbed a hand over his face. “Night terrors. I didn’t know I still had them. I’m sorry I woke you.” He became aware of his nakedness and brought his knees up a little closer to his body. “Could you pass me something to cover myself?”

  Violet untangled one of the sheets from the pile on the floor and handed it to him. “Can I get you something?”

  “Some water would be good.” His voice still sounded shaky.

  She went through to the minibar to get a bottle of water. When she returned to Nate’s room, he was sitting on the edge of the bed with the sheet wrapped around his waist and his head in his hands. Violet sat next to him, placing the water on the floor.

  “What causes these night terrors?”

  He straightened, and she saw the lines of tension in his face. “I told you I was attacked.”

  “Yes, but you didn’t tell me the details.” She wanted to reach out to him, to wrap her arms around him and hold him, but his earlier rejection of her was still fresh in her mind. She didn’t know how welcome her touch would be.

  When he turned his head, his eyes were hollow pools of pain. “I was attacked by a werewolf.”

  Violet did close the space between them t
hen, wrapping her arms around him and holding him close. She felt his whole body tense and then relax in her embrace. “I don’t understand. You are not a werewolf now.”

  “It’s a long story.”

  “I’m not going anywhere. You helped me when I had no one else.” She tilted her chin so she could look at his face. “That works both ways.”

  He nodded. “I’ve never told anyone. Not all of it. Six years ago, I was attacked by a feral werewolf. I was just like that poor bastard who came after you, driven mad by an urge inside me I couldn’t understand. I could live a normal life until the full moon came around, and then I believed I was going mad as I shifted and became a werewolf against my will.”

  “But those werewolves we saw at the party in the woods didn’t need the full moon to shift.”

  “Werewolves have evolved over time. The original werewolves did need the full moon to shift. Feral werewolves, like the one who attacked you and the one I became, still need the full moon. That’s because we are the remnants of an intended kill. We were not meant to survive the attack. In my case, I only lived because the werewolf who was attacking me chose to do it in a town. He was interrupted by a group of passersby.”

  Violet shuddered and tightened her arms around him. “I’m glad.”

  Nate placed his hands over hers and gripped them. “I wasn’t. Not for a long time. Not until recently.” Before she could ask what he meant by that, he continued, “I tried to resist the werewolf cravings, but they were too strong. Then I started to hear a voice in my head. It was driving me to find a young woman called Stella and kill her. This is going to sound crazy, but Stella is a powerful sorceress. At that time, she was in hiding because she was being sought by the leaders of a place called Otherworld.”

  Violet shivered. Otherworld? Had she heard that name before? She wasn’t sure if it was that word that had such a strong effect on her, or if it was Nate’s story. A story involving werewolves was far-fetched enough—but having seen them for herself, her imagination could stretch that far—now she had to open her mind even further and include a sorceress.