So. Frigging. Weird.
And a little bit hot.
But this was the plan to help Gareth get past whatever this block was in his head. His wife wouldn’t have wanted him to be alone. At least, I would hope not.
“Liz, do you have a hammer?”
“In the kitchen pantry. Third shelf.”
I somehow managed to keep myself calm enough, listening at the door for him to go into the kitchen. Not that I had my entrance planned precisely, but this was a bit better than the cheesy hey sexy, wanna fuck bit I had in mind.
Holding myself back until I knew he was rummaging in my pantry, I tiptoed my way into the living room, pushing open the door to my bedroom on the way. I had practiced my pose—Connie insisted—so I knew exactly the impression I was giving.
Imposing. Sexy.
As long as I didn’t laugh.
Please God, don’t let me laugh.
“I don’t know how you and Connie can find anything in that mess. I’m surprised Stephen hasn’t made you—” Gareth stopped dead in the doorway, his eyes wide. “Whoa.”
“Are you criticizing my organizational skills?”
I would have loved to have cocked an eyebrow the way he does when he’s annoyed with me, but I can’t do it. Instead, I narrowed my gaze and lowered my chin. I knew I got the look right when he sucked in a sharp breath.
“Liz, what are you doing?”
“That’s Mistress Elizabeth. I’m the one in charge here tonight.” Okay, so I actually sounded pretty good there. Liz on steroids or something.
Gareth smiled and gave his head a small shake. “I’m not sure I want to play this game, Liz.”
“Believe it or not, this isn’t actually about you. Now come here.”
Stephen had let me borrow his riding crop from his toy box. He said it would add to the whole air of control, plus it would give me something to do with my hands. The downside was how sweaty my palm was getting as I had to wait to see if Gareth would come this far, trust me enough to at least hear me out.
Gareth pushed his wire-framed glasses up his nose. He always wore his contacts when we were doing a scene, but I loved seeing him in his glasses. It was another subtle change that I hoped would help make things work tonight. I didn’t move—a feat in itself—as I waited. He was always more patient than me, but I could see the cracks in his resolve tonight.
This was different. I’d not only caught him off guard, but I’d nudged him into unfamiliar territory. From what Stephen had told me that was something very few people had ever been able to do.
When he took that first step toward me, I wanted to jump and whoop. I bit the inside of my cheek and tightened my grip on the crop instead.
“Liz?”
I narrowed my gaze again.
“I mean, Mistress Elizabeth?”
“Not another word until you come here.” Stephen’s crash course on being dominant had been helpful, but most of what I needed to know I’d learned from Gareth himself. The way he handled me, how he kept himself composed, how still he could be. That was the type of Domme I wanted to be for him. I had a feeling he needed it more than most.
I could smell his cologne and the faint whiff of sweat from having moved the heavy boxes up from the car as he drew closer to me. Normally, I’d be the one begging to lick the side of his neck, needing to taste him. It was oddly arousing to be on the other side of this power exchange.
Tonight it was my job to look after Gareth, to make sure that he knew he was as safe with me as I was with him. To give back to him the gift he gave so freely to me.
Gareth still hesitated, but after a few more moments he sauntered over to me. I could tell by the way he moved he wasn’t convinced that I was serious about this whole thing, but he was willing to play along for the time being. He stopped half a foot from me and grinned.
Wearing these boots, I was nearly as tall as him. I don’t know if the added few inches gave me more confidence, or if I was actually starting to slip into the role. Instead of my normal lip-biting routine, I lifted my chin and evenly met his gaze.
“On your knees.”
He did cock an eyebrow then—God, I wish I could do that—but didn’t otherwise move. Now, Liz would have been tempted to throw a “Please, Sir” on the end of that command. But right now I was Mistress Elizabeth and I wasn’t about to be begging for anything. Without looking away from him, I flicked the crop so I landed a smack to the outside of his thigh.
“Now.”
It was weird. One moment we were standing there as equals. I had asked in the strangest way possible for him to trust me and go along with what I had planned. Though he didn’t actually say the words, I knew he understood. I was then forced to stand by and watch him work his way through his decision. God, I could practically see his thought process running through his mind as he weighed the pros and cons, the benefits of going along for the ride.
I must look this way to him too. Even more so.
Connie always told me the power actually lies with the sub in these situations, but I never quite believed her. Not until this moment when I realized if he said no, or made any indication that he wasn’t into what I was about to do, that I’d have to walk away. I might be the one with the crop, but that wasn’t true power.
Shit, I hadn’t considered that he might say no. This wasn’t something we’d ever discussed before and despite Stephen’s reassurances, I didn’t know for certain if he’d be into this.
Plan C—we’d have to have a conversation. Not sure how that would go.
Gareth cocked his head to the side and let his gaze run down my body. I wanted to preen, but that, too, wouldn’t have worked. Mistress Elizabeth wouldn’t care what a sub thought of her appearance. She was a bastion of power and control. Queen of the bedroom.
I sighed and tried to look bored. He chuckled again. But after a few more seconds, he sank slowly to his knees.
Oh.
Oh yes, please.
I moved behind him, careful not to touch any part of his body, but needing to get out of his line of sight for a few moments. While I had no problem taking charge at the office when I needed to, this was different. I mean, Gareth had always projected that quiet core of steel, one that I didn’t think could be dented, let alone broken.
Standing there, with him on his knees, I started to wonder exactly how wrong I was.
I let out a huff and did my best to push the distracting thoughts from my mind. I had only one thing to focus on right now and that was the man at my feet.
“You have been hiding yourself from me.” I lightly tapped the back of his head with the crop. “I’m not sure if you thought I was dumb or if I wouldn’t call you on it, but I’ve had enough.”
“Liz, I—”
The fabric of his pants increased the sound of the crop landing against his ass, even though I knew it would dull the sensation. It didn’t stop him from jumping or twisting around to look at me. I’d surprised him, and I could tell from his eyes that he hadn’t been taking Mistress Elizabeth seriously.
Oh, dude, that was mistake number one.
“Take your shirt off.”
It was funny how I found myself trying to emulate what Gareth did to me. Voice calm and steady, free from emotion. I kept out of his line of sight and touched him only when I wanted to get a reaction. I made him wait until the limits of his resolve were tested.
The bastard had more patience than me, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t do this.
I gave the top of his shoulder a tap with the crop, a bit harder than maybe I should have, when he didn’t react. “I said, shirt off.”
Gareth let out a shuddering breath. Slowly, he started undoing the buttons of his shirt. Inch by inch, his body was revealed to me. Firm skin and tight muscles as the fabric dropped down his arms and finally to the floor. I couldn’t stop myself from running the leather tip of the crop along the back of his shoulders, down the curve of his spine to the top of his waistband.
“Very nice.” I c
ounted to five in my head, took a breath, and moved around him until I stood in front of him once more. “Excellent in fact.”
“Thank you.”
I lifted his chin with the crop and waited for him to correct his mistake.
“Thank you, Mistress.”
Yeah, I could get used to this.
“I’ve noticed you’re not very good at listening. I plan on teaching you how to be better at it. What do you have to say about that?”
Gareth didn’t say anything. Okay, not exactly the response I wanted, but I couldn’t let his stubborn streak get to me. “See, this is exactly what I’m talking about. Not listening. I asked you a question. I’m waiting for a response.”
He kept his eyes up and locked onto mine. There wasn’t the normal calm I was used to seeing in him. Holy shit, he actually looked a little freaked out. I knew I was supposed to stay in character, but I couldn’t, not with him barely keeping it together. I reached down and cupped his face in my hands, letting the crop fall to the floor.
“We can stop this right now.” I leaned in and kissed his forehead. Gareth sucked in a sharp breath, but he didn’t otherwise move. “I . . . I probably got this all wrong. I got the impression you might enjoy having someone else in charge for once. Give you a bit of a break. And I wanted to show you that I could actually do this . . . and I wanted to just . . .”
I pulled back enough to watch him swallow. His eyes were filled with unshed tears and his hands were shaking as they hung limp by his side. Dammit, this wasn’t right at all. I can’t believe I’d screwed things up so badly this fast.
“Gareth, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. Let’s just forget that I—”
“Thank you.”
I was so surprised I’m sure I gave an excellent gaping-fish impression. “What?”
He reached up and placed his hand over mine. “I don’t think I’ve ever had anyone do something so . . . generous for me before.”
That’s right, that’s me. Good old generous Liz. “What?”
Gareth chuckled, but he made no move to run away screaming. Hell, he somehow went from looking panicked to relaxed in the space of a few heartbeats.
“Liz, you’re not a Domme.”
“Believe me, I know. But Stephen said you needed to have things shaken up a bit, and Connie wanted me to ask you to participate in an orgy, but I was pretty sure you wouldn’t be into that. I thought this might be a better option. So I bought the outfit and borrowed the crop and I really wanted to give you a special night as a thank you for everything you’ve done for me. And maybe see if there was possibly a chance that we could take things a bit further.”
Whoa, he didn’t interrupt my tirade.
He wasn’t saying anything, in fact.
“Gareth?”
“Yes, Mistress?”
Okay, so if I thought I was wet before, having this in-control, domineering man call me Mistress had me nearly coming on the spot.
“Do you want me to continue?” I gave his cheek a gentle squeeze. He was always doing that to me, touching and caressing. It settled me in a way I hadn’t realized contact could. If luck was with me, it would do the same for him. “Because for a minute there it looked as if you were freaking out. I need you to say the words so I know I’m not forcing this on you.”
Gareth didn’t have the same tells that I did. He didn’t lick his lips or bite his cheek when he got nervous. But surprisingly, he would drop his gaze. An odd thing given what he enjoyed doing in the bedroom. Though I’ve come to the realization that who we are when the door closes doesn’t encapsulate everything about us as a person.
Currently, Gareth was staring at a spot on my chest—probably my cleavage. It was a really nice corset and did its job spectacularly.
“Yeah, I think I do.”
There was that internal Snoopy dance going on again.
“What’s your safeword?”
“Book.”
“Book? Really? That’s very . . . book?”
“Don’t make fun of the safeword, Liz.”
“Right. Sorry. Book, it is.”
I had to step away then and give myself a minute to get back into character. I also knew that he’d need a few moments of quiet himself. It really is a different headspace when you’re doing a scene, even if it’s with someone you care about. Especially then. The last thing you wanted to do was fuck it up and hurt them.
As weird as this was, I wanted to show him that I could be the woman he could trust to take the next step with. The only way I could think to do that was to pretend to be something I wasn’t, to give him something he needed.
I loved him enough to make the effort.
Starting up my saunter around him once more, I made sure to scoop up the riding crop from where it had fallen. The leather wrap around the handle had cooled down, but it wouldn’t be long before we had it hot and sweaty once more.
It was time.
I had a Dom to train.
CHAPTER 9
The apartment was hot. I’d turned up the temperature when Gareth had been bringing the bookcases up from the car. The last thing I wanted was for him to be cold, but holy shit, I might have put it up a few degrees too high. A fine prickle of sweat lined his bare shoulders, making them glisten in the low light.
He’d been on his knees, waiting for me to finish my poking and prodding for the past fifteen minutes. If our positions were reversed, I’d have been totally freaking out in my head. It doesn’t sound as if it’s a long time, but when you have someone standing over you and you’re completely at their mercy, oh yeah, it’s a lifetime and then some.
Honestly, I had been biding my time as I mentally went over everything Stephen told me I should do. I wasn’t experienced at using whips, paddles, and canes, and there was a real possibility that I could hurt him if I did something wrong. Gareth had been too good to me over the months for me to screw up and do him harm.
Slow and steady won the kinky race.
“Stand up and take your pants off.” I hadn’t realized how dry my mouth had gotten. I think this was probably the longest I’d gone not speaking in recent memory. I hate silence and can’t resist the compulsion to fill it.
Gareth loved the calm. I had been fascinated to watch his muscles tense and relax as the minutes ticked on. He jumped at the sound of my words, but moved to comply.
“Make sure you fold everything and place it on the chair. I don’t want your shit everywhere.” God, that was bitchy. Go me!
“Yes, Mistress.”
I growled as he walked away from me, his perfect, naked ass swaying as he went. Am I this way? Vulnerable and sexy? The urge to care for him warred with my need to spank his ass, turning it red.
Maybe I had a bit of Domme in me after all.
He placed his clothes on the chair and was about to turn around. “Stop!”
A ripple passed through him and his ass clenched.
As if he knew what was coming. Maybe he did.
“You have a very nice rear end. I want to see more of it.” Amongst other things. “Bend over and put your hands on the arms of the chair. Stick that ass out for me to examine.”
He’d put me in a similar position once. It was during our second scene, the first one out of the club. We’d gone back to his place where he’d gotten things ready ahead of time. The only thing in his living room was a sturdy wooden chair and a paddle. That had been a great night.
Walking up behind him now reminded me of how turned on he’d been then. I’d thought he was going to fuck me so hard I’d feel it for days. Instead, he’d fucked my mouth, making me swallow his come. That wasn’t how I’d wanted that particular evening to end.
Tonight, I would change the outcome to something more suitable.
I ran my hand down his side to the small of his back, before cupping his ass cheek. I gave it a squeeze, letting my nails dig into the flesh and leaving marks behind. Gareth sucked in a quick breath, but he held still.
“Do you enjoy that?” I s
queezed the other cheek and then raked my nails down the flesh. “I now understand the appeal of being able to mark you. I’m leaving such pretty pictures in your skin. I could scratch my name there and watch it soak back in. My mark, my claim on you.”
Fascinated with the red lines, I continued to make lines across the expanse of his back, his ass, the back of his thighs. The hair on his legs caught on my nails, tickling the sensitive skin beneath. The longer I continued, the more his body began to shake. Typical Gareth, he took everything with his normal quiet demeanor.
I needed to shake things up.
“You’re being such a good boy. But I don’t think you’re appreciating what I’m doing for you.”
He turned his head and peered at me over his shoulder. “What?”
I gave his ass a slap so hard my hand stung. “Pardon?”
He gasped, but his gaze didn’t leave mine. “I’m sorry, Mistress.”
“That’s better.” I went back to scratching his skin. “Now, what I was saying was you aren’t showing your appreciation for what I’m doing. I want you to talk. Tell me what you’re feeling as I do things to you.”
Ah, there it was, a little flash of panic. Stephen said Gareth had held things too tightly for years. He needed a push to get him out of that dark shell and back into the light of day.
“If you can’t do that, then this can stop right now. Go ahead and use your safeword. I don’t mind.” I pulled back at the same time he grabbed for my hand.
“Please, stay. I’ll try, Mistress.”
Without waiting for my response, Gareth resumed his position, even widening his stance. My heart pounded as my brain finally caught up to everything we’d been doing. Yeah, I know I’d planned this, but planning and doing are two very different things.
A deep breath. Start with the basics, with what you know and everything will come up aces.
I moved so I stood behind him, but slightly to the side. “Start talking.” I punctuated my words with a slap to his left cheek.
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