by Tara Brown
He laughs. “You were spying on us and have a huge timber wolf as a pet." They are jovial and everything smells like food and warm hugs, if warm hugs had a smell.
I don’t laugh. I want Jake and Anna.
Meg gives me a look. “Why would he bring us here if they're not here?"
“The smell of food."
Meg nods. “He’s smarter than I gave him credit for. He found a camp and food. This is pretty amazing. You guys seem real organized. Do you get invaded often?” She’s back to being chatty.
“No. We are pretty vigilant about what is outside of our borders.” The guy with the gun in my face points to Leo. “Keep him under control, and we can drop the weapons."
I pat Leo on the head and scratch his ears. He shakes his head once and froths at the lips, clearly he’s still agitated.
Everyone around us calms instantly, most of the men walk away. It’s then that I take it all in, noticing Meg is right. The camp is like nothing I've ever seen. It reminds me of the band of merry men Robin Hood joins in the forest.
I hear a noise like I've never heard before and turn my head, desperate to kill whatever is making it. Leo raises his hackles as a small boy with white-blond hair runs past me, squealing joyfully. He has his arms stretched out. He latches on to Leo, making me jump to his rescue. Not the kid’s—Leo’s. He gives me a look, like he’s panicking and doesn’t know what to do. I motion for him to lie down to which he obliges, but he makes sure I can see he isn’t happy about it.
"Andy, no. Not the wolf. Oh my God, I'm so sorry.” A dark-haired woman walks up to me, laughing and smiling like we might be friends. She looks older than me, maybe thirty. She's dressed in a long gathered skirt and a blouse, and she's pretty in a simple way. She looks at Meg with a motherly smile. “We need to get you cleaned up and get some food in that belly. You look like you must be starved.” She looks at the man next to me. “Watch Andy for me while I get her taken care of."
The man nods and kneels next to the boy who is shrieking and hugging my huge wolf. Leo pants and gives me his wild eyes. I know he’s asking permission to just eat the little leech. I shake my head.
"His name is Leo. Be careful. Okay, Andy?” The man puts a hand out for Leo to sniff.
Meg gives me a pleading look as the sweet woman drags her off. I want to reach for her and save her but I don't. The woman with the brown hair and dark doe eyes has something about her that makes me comfortable-ish.
Glancing around, I can see there are small, separate fires everywhere with tents surrounding them, like tiny individual camps lining the forest. There are also lean-tos staggered amongst them. I've never seen anything like it. Clothes hang from lines in the trees and people walk chatting and working slowly. Anyone who gets close to us is eyeing me up and staring at Leo.
The canopy provides the perfect shelter. It feels like I've entered a sacred site. Everyone is bustling about, as if on a mission. "This is like the Shire,” I mutter.
"You've read The Hobbit?” The guy with the brat almost sounds like he's whispering.
My neck almost snaps as I look back at him. “Yes. Have you?"
“I read it when I was twelve. My mom was tired of all the comic books, so she told me if I wanted another comic book I had to read a real book first.” He speaks softly as he pats Leo once more and lets him sniff him again.
"Wolfie, wolfie, wolfie.” The white-haired angel cries into Leo's dark fur. Leo looks finished with the hug and struggles to escape.
"He's done,” I warn.
The man pulls him off, causing the boy to make the same ungodly noise as he did running to Leo. “Nooooo, Will. I wanna hug the wolfie. I wanna wolfie. Miiiiine."
The name and the face and the comic-book addiction all ring bells and make me gasp, “Will?” The eyes and the smile—he looks almost exactly like they do. “Anna and Jake's brother, Will?"
Will’s face drops. “Anna and Jake? My brother and sister? You know them?"
I nod.
His face grows savage. He lets go of the boy and shouts, “WHERE ARE THEY?" Like I took them.
I point at the camp, shaking a little at the aggression coming off him. “I thought they were here." Leo doesn’t like what’s going on. He leaps in between us and knocks Will to the ground.
He has him by the scruff of his shirt and is making a noise I've never heard before. Will doesn't try to push him off, luckily. He just lies still, like he’s been attacked enough times to know what to do.
"Leo.” He ignores me. I sit on the ground and make a whistle sound. He tugs once more on the shirt and backs away, sauntering to me. He's overwhelmed. I am overwhelmed. He curls up in my lap and I stroke his ears as he trembles.
Will sits up, giving me a look. I shake my head at him, warning him. He gets up and walks to me. Leo growls and snarls in my lap. I look up at Will and shake my head again. “I wouldn’t move if I were you."
His dark eyes play in the dim light of dusk. “They're alive?"
I nod. “Last time I saw them."
“We need to talk about this. Can you just make the wolf go lie down somewhere?”
“We can talk like this.” He makes me nervous.
His jaw tenses as a rugged man walks up to where we are. “Will, I need to go over some things with you."
The white-haired boy sees the man and starts his tirade all over again. He is stamping his feet and pointing at Leo, who trembles. The noise will no doubt draw the others or worse, so I wrap my arms around Leo and glare at the young boy, hissing at him, “Stop that, you little brat. You'll get us all killed.”
Will and the other man laugh at me as they talk. I scratch his face and kiss his wolf cheeks, muttering, “I’ll protect you.” It makes me think maybe we shouldn't stay. Maybe we should get going. I need to find Anna and Jake, and Leo needs to escape the bratty white-haired devil.
Meg walks up to me in a clean dress with patches and her hair slicked back and wet. Her face is stark without the film of dirt she has been covered in since I met her, and she’s holding a platter of sorts covered in meat and something white. "Em, thith ith cheeth. You have to have thum.” Her mouth is near bursting as she speaks. I grimace watching her stuff her gourd as my granny always said. She sits beside Leo who raises his face instantly and starts eating from her plate. She doesn’t even bother to fight him for her food, which I suspect she brought to share with him. His body vibrates as his jaw reaches for the food.
The man beside Will has picked the boy up, stopping his rage but the little brat is still crying and reaching for the brown-haired lady with the doe eyes.
"You little monkey.” She twirls him around. She loves him so much. I can see it on her face. I think if given the chance she could love everyone in the whole world.
Meg shudders seeing the lady but keeps eating.
The dark-haired lady kisses the brat, scowling sideways at Meg. “Megan, sit like a lady."
Meg looks up with the drumstick of a bird hanging from her lips, sitting cross-legged with her skirt hiked up and her tanned legs showing. Leo makes the same face with a large chunk of dark meat.
The man holding the brat bursts into fits of laughter.
Meg frowns at me. “Wha . . .?"
I shake my head. “I don't know.” I don't understand why the lady is getting upset—she doesn’t even know us.
"I can see your undergarments, Megan."
Meg looks up at the dark-haired lady and frowns. “Then give me back my pants. Or stop looking."
I snicker at her saucy ways. Granny would have smacked me six ways into Sunday if I ever talked like that. I imagine Meg’s mom would have done the same.
The doe-eyed lady frowns. “Those pants are being burnt. We will have new pants for you in a bit. Until then, try to act like a human being."
Meg blushes and pulls her skirt around her knees. “Yes, ma’am.” She glances up at me with a wide-eyed look of confusion.
I’m stroking Leo’s ears and rubbing under his chin. He’s closing hi
s eyes and relaxing, making his weird wolf noise that he makes when he's happy. It nearly sounds like a cat purring but it's lower and deep inside of him. The food has won him over where the people couldn't. It’s weird that he’s so comfortable over some cheese. Crazy wolf.
The platter is empty, and I've had nothing. Meg gets up and saunters lazily over to the far side of the camp again. She brings back another plate, getting Leo’s attention.
I steal a piece of cheese before they both eat it, closing my eyes and savoring the salty flavor. Maybe this place isn’t so bad. Not that it matters. I have to find my friends. “The people I'm looking for—Anna and Jake. Will is their brother.” I point to Will subtly.
Meg raises an eyebrow. “You think that’s why Leo brought us here?"
I shrug. “No, I think he smelled the food."
Meg grins with food in her teeth. “Thank God for Leo and his belly."
"I'm worried about where they are though. If they're not here, where could they have gone?"
"The farms.” She says it nonchalantly, even though I know she fears the idea of it, whether she has met them or not.
My skin prickles thinking about them in the farms. Anna is old enough to be put to “work” and Jake is strong. He will be made to work hard labor.
I look up and see people eyeballing us still. They pretend to be working near us, but they watch Leo eating. It makes me smile. If only they knew what a pussycat he is.
Fingers dig into my skin. “Wolfie mine!” The evil little brat shouts in my face. I hate him. It’s decided. He has to go. His greedy little fingers are wiping an orange paste on my shirt making me lean away from him. Leo leans in, growling and smelling like cheese. He is going to eat this kid.
"Don't look so horrified. He's just a kid.” Will picks the little monster up and carts him back to the doe-eyed lady. I feel sorry for her. Her life must be horrid. My eyes get stuck, staring and slightly panicking at the orange stain mixed with debris smeared across my sleeve. I glance up at Will. “Is there somewhere I can wash up?"
He nods at the dark-haired lady. “Mary can take you."
She smiles. “Follow me.” She passes the evil beast with the white hair to a man next to her.
“I’ll be right back.” I nudge Meg who speaks with a mouthful, “Just don’t get roped into the dress and them brushing your hair. It's a bad experience. Leo's fine with me." The two of them stay huddled around the chicken, cheese, and apples.
I have to leave. I don’t want Leo anywhere near the little monster. It's going to touch him and hurt him. Then Leo will bite and they’ll defend their little brat. We'll have to leave, even if it ruins my plan to have a good night’s sleep. Maybe the first one in ages.
"You've never seen a child before, have you?” Mary asks sweetly as we walk past a grouping of tents and lean-tos. She leads me down a steep, narrow dirt path.
"Not up close in over ten years. Just the ones left behind when the moms get taken. I don’t hang around long enough to get to know them though."
"That's horrible. You left little kids alone? What kind of a person would leave little kids to die out there?"
“A little kid.” I don’t care if she judges me. I am alive. “I was a kid too, Mary. I barely took care of myself and Leo these last ten years."
She crosses her arms. “He gets tired once it's after six. He really is a sweet boy. Once you get to know him, you'll love him."
I try not to be rude but speak my mind. “He will get you killed with noises like that. The infected love noisy things that lead to food. And the others don't care about the kids, it’s just the moms they want."
She looks back aghast. “We never leave the camp. None of the children do."
"So you have an agreement with the infected and the others that they stay out of your camp so the kids can be as noisy as they want?” My sarcasm is filled with more sarcasm.
“You really don’t have any social skills, do you?" she scoffs.
“I've made it this long out there alone."
She looks shocked. “How long have you been alone?"
My anger and pain are pulled away from me when we get to the bottom of the hill. I stumble past her and sigh at the view. The words sort of fall out of my mouth as my eyes get captured by the possibility that this is real. “Since the beginning.” There before me is like a magical lagoon from a movie set—from before. It is like nothing I have ever seen.
The walls surrounding the massive lagoon are high and rocky. Nothing can get to the vast pool of jade-green water. The only visible path is the one I'm standing on. I am alone here with Mary. I don't even think, I just move, pulling off my boots and socks, ignoring the stinging of the scabs on the dirt and rocks, and tearing my clothes off.
A moment of hesitation occurs when I glance back at her. I think I’m a little scared of the huge pool but she wouldn't have brought me down here if it weren’t safe.
Mary smiles like she is giving me permission so I take it, running down the remainder of the path and out onto the huge flat rocks that make a platform in the water. I dive in before I can chicken out. The cold rips through me instantly, but I have never felt this clean. My baths as a small kid that were filled with bubbles and hard plastic mermaids are a close second, but this is much better. The freshness of the water makes me feel alive in a good way. I lie on my back and float. The huge rocky walls surrounding me are amazingly high and rugged. The tops are high enough that even if I was spied upon, I wouldn’t know who they were and vice versa.
I glance over at Mary as she jumps off the rock and blush as she enters the water with a big splash. She is completely naked. I've never seen another naked woman before.
She comes up to the surface, spitting and shaking the water from her head and smiles like we are old friends. “So where are your parents?” Apparently, she also has no problem going for the personal details right off the bat.
I lie back again and watch the sky grow dark blue as the evening fully starts to set in. I have never told this to anyone. It scares me a little to share it, but I have spent a decade scared so it’s nothing new. The words leave my lips like they want to, like they trust her or they just desperately need to get out of me. “My mom died when I was really little. She had cancer."
"Back then everyone had cancer."
"Yeah, I guess so. Anyway, she died and it was me, Dad, and my grandparents. My uncle came by a few times, but not much.” I can hardly recall his face.
“How are you still alive?”
The question everyone has always asked. I smile. “My dad was a survivalist so when things got bad, we got out early and went to his friend’s and waited to see what was going to happen. He taught me a lot of things I needed to know."
She chuckles. “Wow, I heard about those people. I remember hearing my mom and dad call them wing nuts and crazy."
I sigh and remember all of it bitterly. “Yeah. That’s how I felt about him. Well, until the infection hit and Japan had those massive earthquakes and the tsunamis hit the West Coast. Then I was pretty impressed at his resources—him and his friend’s.” My voice trails off as the visions of it seep back in. He was so smart. I realized that too late. I never thanked him for what he did.
“Hey!”
I turn, realizing I’m lost in thought and she’s talking.
"Did you get separated—from your dad and his friend?"
I shake my head. “No.”
Her eyes narrow with sympathy. She knows what I mean. But I tell her anyway. “We hid at a friend's bunker till we could get out of the urban areas. We were on our way to my grandparents’ cabin when we were in an accident. He was pinned under the jeep. The hunters were coming—"
I don’t look at her or finish my thought. I have always been ashamed of that moment so I skip it. “I was on a hillside and I heard a gunshot. I knew it was him that got shot.” My heart breaks all over again.
She splashes me. I look up at her and see the tears running down her cheeks, but they can’t beat
the smile on her lips. Her voice cracks a little, “How many times have you swam in the last ten years for no reason other than to be happy?"
I’m confused and lost in the conversation suddenly. “Um, three times. No two. Once I was being chased by the infected."
“Yeah, that doesn't count.” She laughs. “How great is this moment?"
I'm annoyed by her randomness and my inability to dislike her. Like she weaseled under my skin without an invitation. She’s like Jake, filled with the goodness of before. I nod. “Pretty great."
Her eyes are glassy under the light of the dark sky. “Then leave the rest of it where it happened. They ruined everything ten years ago. We can't let them ruin the future too.” She splashes me again. “We have to find our way back from this, kid. It doesn't matter what has happened—to any of us. Our families wouldn’t want this to change us. They would want us to find a way to be the people we would have been.”
The anger is sucked out of me. She's right. I've lived afraid of making friends and helping people. Being in the camp has already made me feel more human.
Suddenly a noise rips through the air, making me spin around as several people jump into the water. The waves and splashing take over the lagoon.
"Oh my God, it's freezing,” a blonde girl who's a little older than me says through chattering teeth. I realize suddenly mine are chattering just as a huge hand comes up behind her and pushes her face under the water. I swim away quickly in a panic. A young guy laughs as she breaks the surface and shoves him. “Ass."
They're playing in the water and my heart is pounding in my throat. Memories of people playing in the water flood my mind. I don't have a response for it. I don't know how to see it as fun. For every face that's smiling, there is one that's dead in my memories.
"Kim, you know you love me.” The guy pulls her into his embrace and kisses her with force. Suddenly, she is pressed against him and they're kissing like people did in the movies, before.
Someone swims up behind me, and as I turn I see a huge hand coming for my head. I try to swim away but my foot is grabbed and I’m sucked under. The whole being pulled under thing is making me panic and kick as hard as I can. My legs are dragged back, and I'm squished into a warm body. I swallow water before I'm able to break the surface, making me push on the skin I touch and force my head above the water in a panic.