by Cole Lepley
“Let’s just go back downstairs. Your friends probably wonder where you are.”
Judah’s face morphs in disgust. “I don’t care about some party right now. I care about you.”
His large frame blocks the door when I try for the handle, the determination rigid in his features.
“Let’s just go back downstairs. We can go home and talk more if you want—but please, can we go?”
He uncrosses him arms and rubs the side of his face, still tense. The guy outside knocks again, but Judah still doesn’t move. It goes another full minute until he looks at me and nods.
“Okay, if that’s what you want.”
“Yes,” I say and then lean over and kiss him once on the lips. “That’s what I want.”
He kisses me back, and it’s brief. There’s still anger in his eyes and when he turns around, I grab his arm.
“Judah, I know you want to protect me and I’m grateful.” His eyes drift back to mine and I take a breath. “—but this is me protecting you.” He tries to look away from me again, and I place my hand on the side of his face so he can’t. “Judah?”
“Okay,” he whispers.
This time when he pulls away from me, I let him open the door. The guy from earlier, Adam, is standing in the hallway grinning while a girl covered head to toe in hot pink and orange body paint licks his neck. Well, at least that’s what it looks like she’s doing. I can’t focus because Judah is already halfway down the hall. I mutter an apology to Adam and almost jog after him.
He’s too fast and by the time I reach the top of the stairs, he’s already at the bottom. I grip the railing from the balcony above and my heart pounds. The darkness of the room does little to disguise the cluster of guys near the front, and Sean is standing the middle of them.
It takes a minute to realize what’s happening. All the guys are suddenly pushed to the front of the room and Judah has Sean back against the wall by his throat. It’s a nice visual for me, but I need to put a stop to this. It’s like watching every fear I have come to life in front of me. Judah could get kicked off the team for fighting—or worse.
Pushing my way through several guys I make it behind Judah. Holden has his arm wrapped around Judah’s waist trying to pull him back, as Judah lands a forceful punch to Sean’s jaw. Sean appears disoriented for a moment, but then he smiles. The sick bastard likes confrontations.
“Judah!” I yell. “Stop!”
He either doesn’t hear me or he ignores me because before I can open my mouth again he lands another blow. This time to Sean’s nose. Sean doesn’t smile this time and blood pours down his face. He growls in anger and throws a hit to Judah’s cheek. That’s when chaos breaks out.
Holden is thrown backward into me, knocking me to the ground. From my new position I can Sean and Judah wrestling back and forth, but I can’t tell who’s winning. I get up to my knees when a hand is lowered down to me. I see bright white teeth and a dark face.
“We need to get you out of the line of fire, girl,” Preston says, grinning.
How anyone could find a fist fight amusing is beyond me. The only thing it leads to is trouble, and that’s the last thing I want for Judah.
The surrounding cheers are almost deafening as they continue to beat each other senseless. Now that I’m standing again, it’s clear Judah’s winning. Sean sways after each hit and appears to be about to fall at any moment. Holden pushes his way back in and drags Judah back. His eyes are ravenous as he stares at Sean, leaning against the wall.
He scans back through the crowd searching for something. When his bloodshot eyes find mine, I realize he was looking for me.
He turns back to Sean once more and whispers something in his ear. The look on Sean’s face tells me it wasn’t something good. For someone to smile after being beaten so badly speaks for how evil he is. His bloody teeth are wide as he takes in Judah’s apparent warning.
I don’t wait for Judah to come find me. I push back through the crowd and out the back door. When I reach the porch steps, I’m already struggling to breathe. The entire house felt like it was caving in around me. All the people, the shouting, Sean and Judah—everything. It’s all too much.
I only make it to the sidewalk when Judah comes jogging up beside me.
“Mack, where are you going?”
I pull my jacket tighter around me and quicken my pace. “Home.”
He tries to grab my hand, but I pull away. Hurt flashes in his eyes.
“Babe, I’ll take you. Just stop for a minute will you?”
He’s still out of breath and I don’t blame him. He just went three rounds in the middle of a frat party defending my honor. Honor I never earned.
Facing forward, I keep walking. “I need to be alone, okay?”
He steps in front of me, blocking my path. “No, it’s not okay.” He grips my shoulders so I have to look at him. “I’m sorry that got out of hand in there, but I had to do something…”
I push him off of me in anger. “What you did,” I begin. “Ruined everything.”
He releases a breath like I punched him in the stomach and laces his hands on top of his head. “Wow. You’re really going to be mad at me right now.”
“I told you not to, and you did it, anyway. You have no idea how much worse you made everything by antagonizing him.”
“Antagonizing him?” He leans downs to me and whispers harshly. “He called you a fucking whore and threatened to post videos of you online. He deserved a lot worse.”
I drop my hands at my sides. “I did those things. He isn’t wrong.”
When I try to step around him he grabs my elbow. “Wait? You think you deserve what he does to you?”
I don’t answer.
“He’s sick, Mack. He manipulated you. That isn’t love, and it isn’t your fault.”
Still nothing. I stare at him with a blank expression.
He shakes his head and releases my arm. “How can someone so amazing believe they deserve to be treated like that?”
“You don’t know me, Judah.”
His face shifts into anger and he takes a few steps back. “Because you won’t let me! Every time we get the slightest bit close you push me away.”
“Go back to the party.”
I keep walking but he follows right beside me.
“So, what? That’s it? You’re done with me now because I beat up your sadistic ex-boyfriend?”
I bite my lip to hold back tears I don’t want him to see. The only way to get Judah to leave me alone is to lie to him. As much as it will hurt me, I have to hurt him. Getting deeper involved in my situation is only going to make things worse for him, not better.
“I never said this would be something serious.”
He lets out a bitter laugh. “Not serious?” He leans in closer and my heart sinks at the darkening around his eye. “What have we been doing then, huh?”
“It was a bet, right? That’s all this was supposed to be.”
“You know that’s not true,” he grits out. He steps in front of me so I have to stop. “I never gave a fuck about the stupid bet.”
“Well, maybe you should have. Your friends did it because they knew you’d get distracted. Now’s your chance to prove them wrong.”
He huffs a stunned laugh, taking a step back from me. “What are you even saying right now? I don’t understand you at all.”
It’s like taking a bullet—the look on his face. It’s literally tearing me apart, but I can’t let him get involved in this. He has too much to lose.
“I’m saying this doesn’t need to be about love. We had fun and now you can walk away without anyone getting hurt.”
It’s difficult to get the words out this time and I breathe a little heavier. My chest is throbbing and the look of betrayal on his face is only getting worse. I’m ripping his heart out right here on the sidewalk and it’s killing me.
Judah’s jaw ticks and he nods once. “Okay, fine. You don’t love me. But I’m not about to let you walk home
, alone, while some unhinged sociopath has it out for you.”
I glance over his shoulder as Zander is jogging up the road. He looks out of breath even from a few blocks down.
“Zander can walk with me.”
Judah plants his hands on his hips and shakes his head, staring down at the pavement. “You don’t mean this, Mack. I know you don’t.”
“I can’t do this with you right now. It’s too much.”
My voice shakes and tears burn my eyes, but he doesn’t seem to notice. He’s too caught up in being blindsided by my words. His jaw pops and he stares out over my shoulder, unfocused.
Every part of me is screaming to tell him I’m lying. If I’m really being honest with myself I’ve been in love with him since the night we almost kissed. Ever since my sleep has been hindered by thoughts of him instead of the nightmares I’ve been trying to escape.
But I don’t.
When Zander reaches my side his looks between us skeptically. “You guys are quick,” he pants. His eyebrows pull in when he takes in our posture. “Everything okay?”
Judah gives a terse nod and pats Zander on the back. “Text me when you get her home. Let me know she’s safe.”
Without another word or glance in my direction, he turns and walks back toward the party.
Zander is still standing in one spot when I start walking again.
“You’re going to let him walk away?”
I don’t answer and he grunts in frustration. He catches up to me and leans down as he speaks, keeping my pace.
“He loves you, Mack. Can’t you see that?”
“It doesn’t matter?”
“It doesn’t matter,” he huffs. “You’re ridiculous. You finally find a guy who would literally do anything for you and you let him walk away.”
An angry tear falls down my cheek and I let it fall. “He’s better off…”
“Bullshit! That’s a cop out and you know it. You’re just afraid you might actually love him, too.”
I stop walking and close my eyes. I wish more than anything I could be normal. That I could go out on weekends with my charming, handsome boyfriend and never have to feel like I don’t deserve to have that. Instead I’m haunted by panic attacks and the memory of being someone’s property, and eventually their burden.
When I open my eyes again, I turn to him. “No more talking, okay? Please.”
He frowns but does as I ask and laces his hand with mine. We walk the next eight blocks in silence.
When we reach the door to our apartment, I search for my keys. The lock clicks open but the door stops after a few inches. What the fuck? I see the chain hanging and raise an eyebrow.
I take a step back as a tattooed hand removes the chain and pulls the door all the way open.
Perry grins at me and I roll my eyes.
“Jesus, you scared the shit out of me!” I slap him in the shoulder before he pulls me in for a hug.
“Sorry, Mack. It’s unsafe not to have a deadbolt. This was the next best thing.”
I lean back and look him over. “How did you even get in here? I never gave you a key.”
He gives an assertive smile. “I’m a criminal. It wasn’t too hard.”
I step around him and as he and Zander exchange a hug. “I’m glad you’re here, man.”
“It seems like I’m needed.”
Perry makes a small lap around the room as I take a seat on the chair. His shoulders seem broader, the dark tattoos snaking down his arms pop against the white T-shirt stretched across his bulging chest.
He bites down on the ring in his lip eyeing me carefully. “So, Mr. Wonderful paid you a little visit, huh?” He kneels down in front of me so I have to look him in the eye. “And what did I tell you about him coming around?”
I take a deep breath. I’m not afraid of my brother, I’m afraid of what he will do.
“It’s over. He’s going home.”
Perry cracks his neck as he stands. “Not soon enough.” He pokes Zander in the chest. “Where is he?”
Zander’s eyes widen as he looks to me in panic. Perry grabs his chin. “Don’t look at her. You look at me when I’m talking to you. Where is that little fuck?”
I stand up and position myself between them, placing my hand on Perry’s chest. “Don’t be a bully.” I give him a shove and he laughs. Zander lets out a nervous one, but I’m pretty sure he almost pissed himself.
“Sorry, bro,” Perry says pulling a cigarette from his pack and lighting it. “Force of habit.”
Zander rubs the back of his neck. “Yeah, prison must be all kinds of fun.”
Perry chuckles taking a long drag. “Hey, you might like it.”
Zander shrugs and I can’t help but laugh. “This little reunion is fun and all, but I’m exhausted. Can we continue this in the morning?”
Perry takes another drag, the tick in his jaw still working overtime. He nods to Zander. “You making waffles?”
Zander smiles. “Anything for you.”
Perry laughs again and leans back on the couch. “Okay, I’ll give you a pass until tomorrow.” He pauses and points to me. “But tomorrow we end this one way or another. Preferably with Sean in a body bag.”
I reach in the hall linen closet and throw him some blankets. “Good night. Don’t leave the house while I’m sleeping.”
He brushes me off with a laugh and I pad back to my bedroom. As soon as I close the door, the tears I’ve been holding in break free like a dam has burst. I curl into a ball on my bed without even bothering to remove my clothes.
The pillow I clutch smells like him, so I inhale deeper. Knowing Judah for such a short time has healed my heart so much. That why I can’t bear to break his. Even if I already did.
Chapter 25
Wicked Game
Judah
A sharp kick to my ribs jolts me awake. I fall sideways and grasp my side, releasing a deep groan. My tired gaze travels up a pair of black combat boots, worn jeans, to a set of stormy brown eyes. Whoever he is, he looks mad.
“Who the fuck are you?” he growls, a cigarette hanging from the corner of his mouth.
I look up and down the hallway to orient myself. Last night after Mack took off, I went back to the party and got pretty lit. Then I felt guilty about it and came to her apartment. Obviously I never worked up the courage to knock because I’ve been sleeping outside her door since about three in the morning.
He takes a drag from his cigarette and kneels down in my face. This dude is intense.
“I won’t ask you again,” he sneers, clenching his fist. “Who the fuck are you?”
Holding my hands up, I answer fast. “I’m Judah. Who the fuck are you?”
This makes him smile. He takes another drag and stands up straight. “You’re awfully mouthy to be passed out in front of my little sister’s apartment right now.” He snubs his cigarette out right on the wall and tosses it to the ground.
I rub my hand on the side of my face and speak through a yawn. “Listen, I’m not looking for any trouble. I was worried about Mack. I needed to make sure she was okay.”
He laughs, recognition flashing on his face. “Stand up, pretty boy. I know who you are.” My eyebrows pull in as he extends his hand to me. “I’m Perry.”
“I didn’t know she was expecting you,” I say as he pulls me up. It takes a second to gain my bearings. I might still be drunk.
“I’m full of surprises,” he says with a smirk.
“So is your sister.” When his eyes narrow, I regret the bitterness that just blurted out of me. “I’m sorry,” I say, taking a comfortable step back. “It’s been a long night.”
He continues to eye me with extreme scrutiny. After another moment of awkward silence, he reaches in his pocket and for another cigarette. “You look like shit. I’m taking you for breakfast. You need food.”
My stomach rolls at the mention of eating. “I don’t know if I could. I’m not feeling that great.”
He pats me hard on the back. “I was
n’t asking.” With a shove forward, I walk to the stairwell. I look over my shoulder when we reach the stairs.
“I don’t know if I can drive.”
He chuckles, inhaling deeply as we walk past the no smoking sign. “Don’t worry. I’ll drive.”
It doesn’t take long for me to regret my decision. I white knuckle the dashboard as Perry takes another illegal turn into oncoming traffic. He’s been chain smoking and shouting obscenities at unsuspecting drivers while cutting them off the entire time. We roll through a stop sign, and he grins over at me.
“It’s been a minute, man. I missed driving.”
I release a nervous laugh and shout over the radio blaring in the background. “Maybe you should practice more.”
He laughs and presses the accelerator. I think I might die today.
When we screech to stop along the curb of a popular diner, I say a silent prayer that my life was spared. He kicks his door open and I take a breath before following behind him. He strolls into the restaurant and gives a nod to the waitress like he’s been here a thousand times before, although I would bet he never has.
We slide into a corner booth and the smell of bacon grease and coffee hits me hard. I raise my hand to my mouth and stifle a gag.
Perry peruses the menu with a grin. I think he knows this is torture for me and I think he likes it.
“So, pretty boy. Whatcha having?”
I squeeze my eyes shut tight as another wave rolls over me. “Just coffee.”
He laughs, closing his menu. “Well I’m starving.”
The waitress walks over and leans on the booth close to Perry. He takes his time admiring the tight shorts of her uniform.
“What can I get you guys?” she purrs.
Perry motions to me. “My friend here is starving. He can start.”
He winks at me and I resist the urge to roll my eyes. I have a feeling that may earn me another black eye.
I force a smile. “I’ll have a coffee, black. And uh, an English muffin.”
Perry doesn’t have a problem rolling his eyes at me before turning back to the eager waitress.
“I’ll have the special, a side of scrapple, a short stack, and a coffee with extra creamers.”