Jason looked skeptical, but nodded, “Well alright. As long as you talk to someone about it. And you know if you ever need to talk to me, well, I’m just across the hall, okay?”
“Yeah. Thanks,” she said. Then, finally noticing he was only wearing a loose pair of pajama pants, added “I’m sorry if I woke you up”
He stood up with her, shrugging, “It’s okay, I was on third last night so I only just got to bed. I wasn’t even really asleep yet.”
“Well, back to sleep with you,” she said pushing him towards the door of her room.
He hesitated, and she walked with him, “It’s okay Jason, I have to get ready for work anyway. Go back to bed. I’m okay now. And I’ll get in touch with Brynneth.”
“Do you promise?” he asked as he stepped out into the hallway. She stopped short. “Come on Allie I know how this works. Promise you’ll talk to him as soon as you can.”
“I,” Allie mumbled, trying to think of a way out of a binding oath,”ummm, I can’t say as soon as I could because…well, how about…Okay, okay! I promise I will try to talk to Brynneth about this problem I’m having the next time I see the Elven Guards.”
Jason yawned, but seemed satisfied. “Have a good day Allie.”
“Go to bed, Jason,” she said back trying to keep her voice light. And I didn’t say I absolutely would, I only said I’d try she thought to herself, heading down the stairs to get some coffee.
************************
The worst part about the panic attacks, Allie reflected as she pulled into her parking spot behind the store, was that they left her feeling hollow and exhausted. Her head ached dully making it hard to think. It was going to be a long day. The only bright side was that she never had more than two in a week and could always count on at least three or four days before she had to worry about the next one…
She got out of her car, locking it and double checking to be sure it was locked, then walked over to the back door. She stopped a few feet away, her eyes frozen on the small shape lying out in front of the step. What the? she thought before her brain automatically analyzed the shape and said bird. Allie glanced immediately up at the little nest above the doorway, where the tiny overhang offered a small protected shelf, but to her relief she could see – and feel – her wrens were safe. Somewhat reassured but even more puzzled she stepped forward and leaned over the tiny body. It was a robin, dead and cold, but without any obvious injury.
Allie felt the hair on her arms lifting. What are the odds? she thought uneasily No I’m being paranoid. Its been a bad morning and that dream, talking to Syndra has me all worked up. She shook her head and feeling like a coward she nudged the little body over to the side with her foot and stepped up to unlock the door. Its sad but he can feed one of the stray cats. It’s the circle of life and all that. Come to think of it, I don’t know that a stray didn’t leave him there… The thought rang false but she clung to it as she went through her morning routine.
The morning passed quietly, a typical Monday, and she used the time to catch up on phone and internet orders and to work on tracking down some rare books she knew some of her regulars were looking for. One antique grimoire on ancient summoning rites had been mentioned by two different mages in town and Allie was betting if she could get a copy they’d each be too stubborn to let the other have it, which could work out really nicely for her bank account. First she had to find a copy though, and she had a good lead but the time difference was making negotiations, even via email, difficult.
She was sitting behind the counter at her small laptop, trying to decide how much she could safely pay for the book when the front door opened. The new bells that Jason had helped her hang jingled cheerfully and she typed faster trying to finish and save so she could great her first customer of the day. She almost knocked the computer to the floor when a very familiar voice said, “I’m glad you replaced the ward spell on the door. I always thought setting it in the bells was clever.”
“Bleidd!” she yelled, dodging around the counter and for once ignoring the ache in her ankle. He was already halfway across the store and she nearly threw herself across the remaining distance, catching him up in a fierce hug.
She felt his surprise and happiness like a balm and she drank it in, using his emotion to fill up the aching void left by the morning’s events. He pressed her close, “If I knew you’d be this welcoming perhaps I’d think of going away more often.”
She smiled leaning into his shirt and feeling her own tension and stress lessening. She felt safer knowing that Bleidd was home. “Don’t you dare.”
It pleased him to hear her say that and she knew it; for a moment she felt uneasy. Jess would not like this at all, even if she and Bleidd were just friends. You think he’s just your friend a little voice whispered but you know he wants it to be more than that. So why are you encouraging him? She resolutely shrugged the little voice away. “So how was the family visit?”
He stiffened and she knew before he spoke that it hadn’t gone well but did her best not to let it show on her face. She also struggled to strengthen her shields, regretfully cutting off the soothing flow of his emotions. “Well,” he said keeping his tone deceptively light, “I may have been better served staying here with you. Although certainly going back to my former King’s realm and seeing my kin showed me that being Outcast for all those decades wasn’t such a bad thing after all.”
“Really?” she pulled away from him and limped over to the nearest chair; he followed and sat across from her.
“Your ankle still pains you?” his voice was concerned, but she looked away, resisting the urge to rub her left leg.
“It’s about as good as it’s going to get, you know that. Anyway, so you went and saw your family and?” she prompted.
“And nothing. Nothing changes there, not really. I may as well have left only last week for all the difference I noticed. Mortal earth is a beautiful, dizzying constant motion compared to Fairy,” hesmiled, leaning back. She thought that he looked no different after being gone for a month. The same black t-shirt and jeans, the same ponytail of black hair. Unlike her ponytail which carefully covered her ears his hair was pulled back tightly enough to show off the delicate points of his, but then Bleidd had always seemed to enjoy the attention that Allie abhorred. Since it seemed rude to say that he hadn’t changed when he had just implied that lack of change was boring she made a vague noncommittal noise instead.
“They wanted me to stay, of course,” he said, watching closely for her reaction.
“Obviously you didn’t.”
“Maybe I only came back to say goodbye,” he meant it to be teasing but she looked so upset at the words that he immediately added, “or maybe I told them to go get stuffed.”
She pretended to hit him across the space between them. ”That’s not funny.”
“What? Telling my mother to get stuffed? I don’t think I actually have the courage to do such a thing but it is a wonderful thought.”
“I just can’t imagine you not being here,” Allie said.
“And what shall I do if you choose to go with your Elven Guard?” he retorted. “I can’t imagine my life without you either Allie.”
She looked down, biting her lip, “I need to go to the bathroom, I’ll be right back.”
“Allie-“
“I’ll be right back,” she got up and started to turn but he grabbed her arm.
“It’s alright Allie. I’m not going to push you to choose,” he said softly. She nodded slightly pulling free and heading for the bathroom. She didn’t know how to get him to see that he was already pushing her, and that she knew she was being unfair to him, but she also didn’t know how not to depend on him. Why can’t things just be simple? Why can’t he be my friend without also wanting to be in my bed? Why couldn’t he have just told me years ago how he felt instead of waiting until I was with someone else?
When she re-emerged from the back he was standing by the counter holding a small white bag. Seeing h
er he smiled. “I have to go. I wanted you to be the first one I saw when I arrived back, but I need to make sure I still have a job and find out when I can get back on the schedule.”
She blushed and looked down, tracing the wood grain of the counter. “I can’t imagine Henry would fire you. You’re his best employee.”
“Perhaps, but I also just took a month’s vacation without much warning. I’m not so sure he’ll welcome me back with open arms.”
Suddenly she wanted to ask him if he’d stayed sober while he was gone, wanted it desperately, but she was afraid of the answer. So instead she asked, “What’s in the bag?”
“A gift,” he replied simply, smiling wider and holding the bag out. When she hesitated he actually looked offended. “Allie, you know it’s honestly given. Surely you don’t suspect me of offering anything with a hidden cost?”
She blushed harder, feeling stupid. Bleidd might push her as far as he could, as often as he could, and drive her crazy half the time with his persistence, but he had never in all the time she’d known him, tried to take advantage of her in any way through trickery. She reached out for the bag “Of course not. I guess I’m just a little thrown off today.”
He opened his mouth to ask why at the same time she opened the bag, but his question was overridden by her exclamation of joy. “Oh! Apple cider donuts! Oh dear Gods, you’re the best.”
He couldn’t resist preening under the praise, “I know how much you love them and when I was driving into town I saw that the Orchard had them for sale today.”
She caught herself before she could tell him that she loved him for thinking of her because that would surely be dangerous territory. “You are the best. They haven’t even made them in months.”
Eagerly she pulled a small sugar coated donut out of the bag, the sugar gritty under her fingers. The local apple orchard in the neighboring town made the donuts with their own cider and they were delicious, but only available at random and unpredictable intervals. It was one of the few things Allie was willing to go entirely into regular earth for, but most of the time as soon as she found out they were being offered they were already sold out. Bleidd knew how much she loved them and had certainly chosen the perfect way to show his affection. He watched her devour the treat in amused silence until she popped the last crumb into her mouth.
“Allie…” he said. She paused, swallowing, her hand held in mid-air and he took advantage of the opportunity to grab her hand and pull it to his lips. His eyes locked with hers, enjoying the shocked expression on her face as he licked the sugar off her fingers. She blushed crimson and he grinned wickedly. “…I’ll see you at home later.”
Her mouth moved but no sound came out and he laughed his way out the door, leaving her standing there still stunned. Part of her couldn’t believe he’d done that, but the rest of her knew she should have seen it coming. It was just so Bleidd. He might not push her to choose but he was going to make it clear that he wasn’t giving up on courting her either. She wiped her hand on her jeans, flustered by how good his mouth had felt. She balled her hands into fists. Why am I even thinking this? I’m with Jess. Sweet Gods, I’m worrying about him giving in and sleeping with someone else which should be a total non-issue in his culture, I’m making him miserable, and I’m here getting off on someone else sucking on my fingers.
She closed her eyes, trying to banish thoughts of Bleidd and the bells over the door rang again. She looked up quickly, still flustered, and saw a strange elf standing just past the threshold. For an instant she felt a surge of panic but shoved it down; if he meant her any harm his entrance would have broken the wards on the door, but the bells had rang out with their usual cheer. He was dressed in a pair of ripped jeans and a sweatshirt, and it struck Allie as an unusually grubby outfit for an elf to wear. Elves prided themselves on their sense of fashion, whether they were wearing their own styles, which humans often mistook for medieval human clothing, or adopting human styles. His hair was also shorter than she’d ever seen on an elf before, barely curling past his shoulders.
“Can I help you?” she asked keeping her tone friendly but cautious.
He started slightly, as if he hadn’t seen her. “Yes. Well, possibly. I am looking for a copy of Terevelien’s treatise on water magic and weather working. I was told you carry some rare books.”
Allie shrugged, “I do but not many elvish works. Most of my customers aren’t interested in those or can’t read them. I think I do have a copy of Terevelian’s though, but the condition isn’t good.”
He glanced around the shop, “Could you show me, please? I have had no luck finding it elsewhere.”
“Certainly,” Allie led him over to the single shelf of elven books and pulled out the battered copy he was looking for. “The binding is starting to go and the cover is badly damaged, but the text is entirely intact.”
He was nodding, seemingly lost in thought. She handed him the book and started to turn away when he thrust it back into her hands. “I’ll take it.”
She tried to cover her surprise by briskly heading back to the counter and wrapping up the book. She had expected him to at least thumb through the pages and see if they were as she said they were, since he couldn’t know she wasn’t fully human and had no reason to simply take her word. Better not to complain about a sale though, especially one of a fairly expensive book, “Okay. Let’s see, with tax…it comes to $536 even.”
He counted out the money quickly, five crisp hundred dollar bills, followed in equally quick succession by a twenty, ten, five and one. Exact change. Something about that rang a warning bell in Allie’s head but before she could even scoop the money off the counter he had grabbed the wrapped book, mumbled his gratitude, and was out the door. She stood for a minute frowning. Reaching out for the cash she felt the slightest tingle of magic against her fingers.
“Oh crap,” she sighed. Glamouring money was an old trick, a way to get something valuable for nothing or virtually nothing. She usually checked any time she was dealing with any Fey she didn’t know or who was acting suspicious, but this time everything had happened so quickly…You are totally off your game today she thought wanting to hit her head on the counter. That book was expensive and hard to find; he’d have no trouble reselling it. Even some of the pawn shops might take it.
She chanted a quick spell that would dispel any glamour; it was far too weak to work on magic being actively fed energy so her own subtle glamour remained in place. The money on the counter, however, shifted shape and color revealing itself to be a small pile of dried leaves. “Leaves? Leaves?” Allie groaned out loud. “Are you freaking kidding me? That is like literally the oldest trick in the book.”
She gave in this time and slumped over, gently tapping her head onto the counter, muttering “Stupid, stupid, stupid….”
Gritting her teeth in frustration she finally straightened up and reached for the phone. As much as she wished she could forget this embarrassment – and there was no way around how enormously embarrassing this was – she couldn’t afford to get ripped off. Not only the amount, but if word got around that she was an easy mark she’d be dealing with this kind of crap constantly. There was no choice but to call the Elven Guard and report the crime.
She had just started to dial when she glanced up and saw Jessilaen and Brynneth walking in the door in uniform. Like an idiot she glanced from them to the phone in her hand, before shaking herself slightly and hanging up.
“Good afternoon,” she said carefully in Elvish, feeling entirely off balance. Brynneth, as always, looked calm but Jess seemed somewhat amused by the formal greeting. His expression turned serious quickly though when she said, “I was just about to call the Outpost to report a crime.”
“What has happened?” he asked, his eyes sweeping the store.
“Nothing too serious. An elf just paid me for a book with glamoured,” she winced slightly but forced the word out, “leaves.”
Brynneth’s eyebrows shot up in disbelief and Allie struggl
ed not to squirm. Jess, to his credit, took her completely seriously, pulling a small report book out of one of the pockets in his uniform pants. “I can open a case for you. Your store has surveillance video, yes?”
“Yes, let me get my computer turned on and I can pull the footage up,” she muttered. It only took a moment to get everything online but when she accessed the surveillance system instead of a neatly divided screen showing different angles of the store she saw an error message. She mumbled in English, “What the heck?”
“What is wrong?”
“I don’t know,” Allie said, frowning at the screen. She typed quickly, trying to pull up an individual camera only to see the same error message. She picked a random time from last week and the four-way view immediately filled the screen. With a bit of hit-or-miss guessing she finally figured out that the system had gone down last Friday morning. Without thinking she spoke again in English, “Well crap. It looks like my camera system isn’t working.”
The two elves exchanged glances. “When did it stop functioning?”
“Last week. I didn’t notice because I don’t check it very often,” she blew out a long frustrated breath and I don’t have the money to get this fixed right now.
“Can you describe the suspect?” Jess asked, switching back to Elvish and keeping a more formal approach. She might have been annoyed by that except that she was the one who had started off that way and set the tone. She wondered if dating was always this complicated, or if it was only because she was dating the Fairy equivalent of a police officer.
Allie quickly ran through a description of the strange elf, what had happened, the book, and how much it was worth. She also handed over her only evidence, the formerly enspelled leaves, only flinching a little. Jess wrote everything down with businesslike proficiency and Allie felt bad that she hadn’t offered him a more enthusiastic greeting. Elvish etiquette was complex and convoluted and she started to worry that she had forgotten some nuance or erred in some way. Carefully reaching out with her mind while he bagged the evidence she said “I’m sorry I didn’t have a warmer welcome for you. It’s been a difficult day”
Lost in Mist and Shadow: A Between the Worlds Novel Page 7