“Accidents involve cars and trees, Eddie. Or spilled milk. Or a thousand other little things.” With a sad shake of her head, she added, “Accidents do not entail sleeping with ex-wives. Do you still love her?”
“No,” he said quickly. “I mean, not in a romantic sense. She is the mother of my children, though.”
“You are loyal.” She pursed her lips. “Well, I guess that’s something.”
“I’m going to take you home.”
“I think that’s a good idea.”
“Can I call you tomorrow?”
“Of course. But be warned, I may not pick up the phone.”
That was the Jayne he knew. Sweet, but with a bit of spunk. Maybe things were going to work out, after all. “I’ll keep trying.”
Later, after dropping her off and heading on home, Eddie was surprised to realize that all the tension he’d thought would leave as soon as he was open with Jayne was still resting in his shoulders, alive and well.
No, things hadn’t gotten any easier. Just a whole lot more complicated.
Chapter Thirteen
“Elsie is sick,” Mrs. Henderson said over the phone, very succinctly and clearly. “You should not have brought her in today. Frankly I’m surprised that you could be so thoughtless about the welfare of the other children in my care.”
Just when Shawn had thought she’d heard it all, her babysitter came up with a new way to insult her. But this was a new low.
Staring at her mess of a desk—cluttered with her new, very annoying food diary, notes from her latest phone conversations and two granola bar wrappers, Shawn tried to make her see reason. “Elsie is teething. I think that’s why her stomach is so upset.”
“I have six other children to look after. I cannot afford to be changing one child’s clothes every hour.”
It had been once in three hours—and had never happened before. “Like I said, I don’t think she’s sick.”
“Yet…she is.”
Straining for patience, Shawn tried again. “See, Mary’s stomach acted up when she was getting molars, too. Don’t you remember?”
“Mrs. Wagner, when may I expect you?”
Mrs. Henderson had won the battle. “I’ll be there within the hour. That’s as quick as I can make it.”
“I’ll be waiting. Thank you.”
Shawn couldn’t help but groan when she hung up the phone. Oh, the nerve of that woman! She seemed to love to treat Shawn like a truculent teen, giving her little more than a miserly smile. Never giving her more than an inch of leeway. In short, Mrs. Henderson seemed to revel in making Shawn feel like a failure.
Oh, yes. She was very good at that.
Just as she was getting ready to dial Ramona’s number and tell her that she was going to clock out, her boss appeared down the aisle. “I was just about to call you,” Shawn said as soon as her boss approached. “I’m having trouble with my babysitter. Again. Elsie’s molars are coming in. She’s hurting and fussy and has a bit of an upset stomach. Mrs. H. wants me to pick her up right now.”
Ramona frowned. “I don’t know much about babies, but that seems a bit drastic, don’t you think?” She glanced at the clock on the far wall. “You’ve only been here two hours.”
“Tell me about it. I’m going to have to make up today’s time. Even staying here half a day would have helped my schedule.”
“You can’t explain things to her?”
“No, I’m sorry. To you, Elsie is teething. To me, Elsie is teething and is in pain and needs some extra love and attention. To Mrs. Henderson, my Elsie has the plague and is infecting everyone. I don’t think upset stomachs are in her contract.”
“I sure am sorry.”
“Me, too, but I suppose it’s my own fault. I know Mrs. H is terribly inflexible, but I never do too much to try and find a new sitter,” Shawn said as she opened up her canvas tote and started stuffing paperwork into it. “Listen, I’ll log on from home and enter in the rest of my data.”
Ramona patted her hand. “Don’t worry. I understand. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
After Ramona left, Tricia popped her head up from the other side of the cubicle wall they shared. “What can I do to help?”
“Nothing. Unless you can help me find a new sitter.” In spite of her usual efforts not to speak ill of her babysitter, frustration with the woman made her say more than usual. “Now I’ve got to go clock out, make up the time later this week. Maybe even on Saturday.”
After hastily shutting down her computer, Shawn cleared off her desk so that whoever sat in her spot during the next shift would find every thing in order.
Then she glanced over at Tricia again. Her buddy was now sitting down but still not even pretending to work. Almost meekly, Shawn said, “You know, I wouldn’t mind leaving early if Elsie was really sick. I never would have just dropped her off if she had a fever or something. I’m not heartless.”
“You could never be heartless. And don’t worry, Shawn, we both know the truth. She’s not sick—she’s teething.”
It was so nice to hear someone on her side, Shawn felt those darn hormones click in and tears prick her eyes. “Why aren’t you my babysitter, Tricia?”
Looking at her blinking phone with a frown, she said, “Believe me, I wish I was. I’d give a lot to spend the afternoon with a cranky toddler, instead of answering these phones.”
“I’ve gotta go.” Not afraid to nudge Tricia a bit, she pointed to the blinking light. “And you better get to work.”
“I know.” Brightening, she said, “Hey, I’m off tomorrow. I’ll watch Elsie for you if she’s still crabby. I love your kids. And a day spent in the company of Barney, Dora and Thomas the Tank Engine sounds like a dream.”
“Thanks, Tricia. I just might take you up on it.”
“Call me later.”
After flying to her van, stopping to get an extra bottle of children’s Motrin, a box of cherry Popsicles and some iced tea mix, she pulled into Mrs. Henderson’s driveway just fifty minutes after the sitter’s phone call.
Shawn was pretty proud of herself for not only being on time, but even a little early.
The pickup went about as she expected. All three girls were happy to see her but confused as to why their mom was picking them up early. Elsie was uncomfortable and fussy and crying. But that didn’t stop Mrs. H from giving Shawn a piece of her mind. “Please don’t bring Elsie in tomorrow if she’s still like this.”
“She probably still will be cranky. Teeth don’t come in during one day.”
“Feel free to bring the other two, though.”
“There’s no reason for me to bring you two kids if the third can’t come. I wish you’d be a little more professional.”
“Good afternoon, Mrs. Wagner. Oh, it’s Ms., isn’t it?”
“It’s definitely ‘Ms.’” Shifting Elsie to the opposite hip, she helped Mary and Kit get in the van, then drove home. The June heat had already radiated through the van during the short pickup. By the time they pulled into the driveway, Shawn’s back was sweaty and she was exhausted.
After getting everyone a snack of yogurt and fruit, Shawn got settled with them in the living room. Kit was full of stories about her art project and had big plans to spend the afternoon coloring and watching cartoons. Mary, as usual, was happy to play with her dolls and animals near Shawn. Elsie, once a frozen washcloth was in her mouth, fell asleep on the floor near Mary.
An hour later, dressed in shorts and one of Eddie’s old T-shirts, Shawn couldn’t help but smile when Mary gave her a sleepy hug.
“It’s fun staying home, Mommy.”
“I think so, too, sugar. I like seeing you girls and it feels good to stretch out in this big chair. My back was killing me today.” As the afternoon sun shifted along the horizon, her eyes drifted closed.
Only an impatient knocking roused her.
“Shawn? Shawn, are you okay?”
Kit opened the door before her mother could shake the sleep off. “Hi, Daddy. We were t
aking a nap.”
Shawn slowly peeked open an eye as Eddie followed Kit into the room.
Blinked as she met Eddie’s gaze. In an instant they were back in the doctor’s examining room, his arms warm and solid and holding her.
Back to another time. Back to when they first met, before children.
Back when there wasn’t a hundred-pound bag of mistakes between them, only the tempting link of attraction. Back to when just one look would send them eager to bed. Or to anywhere private.
“Hey,” he said. “I was in the neighborhood and thought I’d stop by.”
The unexpected visit was a surprise. “Hi. Guess you got my message?”
“I did.”
“Sorry I don’t have the girls ready. We all fell asleep.”
In Eddie’s gaze was humor and understanding. “You never could resist a nap, Shawn.”
Curving her arms around her stomach, she stared right back and tried to pretend she didn’t realize that his orange T-shirt came from a trip to Key West six years ago.
Remembered how grateful she used to be when they saw each other at the end of the day, because then she’d be in his arms again. Remembered how nervous she used to get when he was on patrol. And how weak with relief she’d be at the end of his shifts when she’d realize he’d come home once again without a scratch on him. “Some things never change, I guess,” she said with a smile.
His gaze warmed. “Since you’re in my shirt and we’ve got a baby on the way, I’d say you’re right. Some things never seem to change at all.”
Chapter Fourteen
Eddie’s body had jumped to attention the minute he’d seen Shawn sleeping in her rocker. He’d bought that chair for her the day of Kit’s sonogram. Shawn had been so excited about having a girl.
So sweetly pleased about their marriage, about their future, she’d taken to wrapping her arms around her stomach in such a way that it looked like she was passing on a hug. Then and there, he’d known he wanted to get something special for her.
She’d cried when he’d carried it in that night after his shift, saying, “Are you sure?” about a hundred times.
When he’d said of course he was sure, he asked her what was going on, and that was when she’d told him she was sorry. Shawn had been disappointed on his behalf, sure that a former Army man like himself was pining for a son to pal around with.
She couldn’t have been more wrong. He’d been thrilled to know a girl was on the way. After serving as an MP for too long and then completing police training, he’d been around enough testosterone for a lifetime. He looked forward to sweet smells and Barbie dolls and Cupid’s bow lips and sweet girlish kisses.
Shawn had given him everything he’d ever dreamed of wanting.
Now they were going through another pregnancy, and the emotions between them couldn’t be more different than they were that very first time. Eddie was torn between wanting to hug her and grin idiotically, and walking away.
So he did nothing. Just stood there, staring at her. “I was on traffic duty all afternoon and was only able to check messages an hour or so ago. Sorry you had to take off work today.”
“It’s okay.” She glanced at her watch. “You’re a little early to take them out for dinner, aren’t you?”
“I am, but I thought since you had to take off early, you might want a little extra time to rest.” He pulled over an ottoman and sat next to her. “So what was wrong with Elsie?”
“Molars and an upset stomach. Mrs. Henderson was worried it was catching.”
He rolled his eyes. “Good old Mrs. Henderson.”
Shawn smiled. “Anyway, as soon as Elsie got a hug, Children’s Motrin and a cool drink, she fell asleep on the floor. I fell asleep, too.” With a stretch, she stood up. “If you’ll give me a second, I’ll go get them organized. It won’t take long.”
“Don’t wake anyone up,” he said, surprising himself. “I can wait.”
Her eyes widened. He didn’t blame her. For the past year, he’d become Mr. Clockwatcher, chiding her time and time again for being late and disorganized. He’d made it a point to arrive at her place early just to show that it could be done—never mind that most times she’d never even noticed.
Now, for the life of him, he wasn’t quite sure why it had all mattered so much. Why had he always made a big deal if everything wasn’t picture perfect at the right time? Why had it bothered him so much that Shawn was—well, Shawn? He’d known when he married her that she couldn’t be on time to save her soul.
And she was rarely all that late—usually just five or ten minutes. He’d made it sound like he’d been waiting for hours. Why?
Had losing the baby made him feel so off-kilter that he’d been trying to control everything?
Kit ran in and gave him another hug. “Daddy, I’m thirsty.”
Just as Shawn started to stand up, Eddie stilled her with a hand. “Stay here. I’ll get Kit some juice and bring you a glass of tea. Maybe we could talk for a few minutes.”
“I guess we do have a thing or two to discuss.”
Kit had been staring at them both wide-eyed. Eddie couldn’t blame their oldest. Lately things had been mighty tense between him and Shawn. “Come here, hon,” he said, walking her into the kitchen. “So, apple juice?”
“Uh-huh.”
After handing Kit her favorite plastic cup, he poured out two glasses of tea. “I’m going to talk to Mommy for a bit, okay? How about you go pick out a movie to take to my house?”
“Can we go see Grandma and Grandpa, too?”
“Sure. But choose a movie, too,” he suggested, knowing that could take up to an hour of careful consideration. “Make sure they’re ones Mary wants to see, too.”
As he’d hoped, she left him with a sense of purpose. Then he joined Shawn once again. After accepting the glass of tea, Shawn looked down at Elsie and smiled softly. “Our baby sure can sleep through anything.”
“She always has. I would have paid money for Kit to be even an eighth that easygoing.” Pulling up a chair, he sat. “But now we’ve got another one on the way. I doubt we’re going to get so lucky again.”
“I doubt it, too. Shoot, Four’s going to most likely be born demanding and loud.”
Eddie pretended to wince. “We won’t have peace and quiet for seventeen years.”
Shawn chuckled. “Remind me when our little terror is born that I was laughing about her future antics.” A minute passed.
She cleared her throat. “So. I’m glad you went to the doctor with me.”
“I am, too.” Recalling their embrace, he said, “Getting interrupted by Debbie was sure embarrassing.”
To his delight, Shawn blushed. “What were we thinking?”
“That seems to be us in a nutshell, don’t you think? We don’t think.”
“Or else we think about the wrong stuff at the wrong time.”
“And get carried away,” he murmured.
To his surprise, Eddie felt himself getting carried away at the moment. Now that they weren’t bickering all the time, he found he was appreciating her more. Appreciating her humor. Not worrying so much that she would never be organized.
That she’d probably never be on time.
And, of course, he’d never admit it to anyone else, but he still found her incredibly attractive. Even pregnant.
Especially pregnant. The situation softened her. Made her look almost vulnerable.
And, truth was, she was sexy as hell.
“How are you doing with the news? Has the thought of Four sunk in yet?”
“More or less.”
“I never even asked about your parents. Were they okay with it?”
Thinking back to their manic coffee-cake eating, he shrugged. “They took it about how you’d expect.”
“Mad at me?”
“Oh, they were never mad at you. They were mad at me, and I deserved it.”
“What happened that night wasn’t your fault. I wanted what happened, too.” She shook
her head. “I told my parents. They were appalled. They couldn’t understand how two people who were divorced could get together like we did.”
“I stopped attempting to explain it to myself.” What was it between the two of them that turned him on so much? Just memories? Or because it was so comfortable?
Gesturing to Shawn’s stomach, he said, “How is Four doing today?”
“She’s okay. Moving a bit.”
He was tempted to touch her. But of course that wasn’t allowed. Her expression seemed so melancholy all of a sudden, he needed to offer comfort. “Everything’s going to be fine, Shawn. The baby will be. We will be. Our situation may not look like we imagined all those years ago, but it will still be a good one. I promise.”
Those brown eyes that he’d always loved softened. “I promise, too.”
There didn’t seem to be much more to say. Truth was, he wasn’t sure how he felt. Suddenly he was wishing she did want to get back together with him. Wished they were a couple and he could look forward to being with her and the new baby every step of the way.
He wouldn’t mind stepping closer and feeling her in his arms, either. “I’ll go help Kit get packed up.”
She held out a hand. He reached down and helped her out of the chair, holding that hand a little too long. “I’ll go get Mary settled. Do you want me to wake Elsie up, or can we put her in the car seat asleep?”
“She can sleep. I’m just taking the girls out for a bite to eat, then a quick visit with my parents. Then we’ll be back.”
Shawn knew he’d worked all day. She knew he had to be tired—it was hot outside and he’d spent a majority of his day out in the heat. “Hey, Eddie? Thanks.”
“No problem. You keep your feet up and eat something healthy, okay?”
“I will. I promise.”
THEY RETURNED three hours later. To his surprise, Shawn let him help her get the girls inside, bathed and tucked in bed. He was standing at her door—wondering how he was going to tell her good-night when he really was in no hurry to leave—when she surprised him again. “Eddie, would you like to stay awhile? Have a beer?”
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