In Autumn's Wake

by Maguire, Megan

  Time.

  It took an eternity to deal with Trevor. We sat for an hour, waiting for Gage to open the garage door and take him off our hands, hoping one of Nick’s thugs wouldn’t kill us after delivering the body. We made it out alive, another secret Autumn and I will share for a lifetime.

  Time.

  It took only a second for Autumn to convince me we weren’t going back to the party. No fancy food, slow dances, or conversations with wealthy older men. I had no reason to object. The faster we got out of there, the better.

  Five minutes became ten.

  Now ten are ticking into twenty.

  Vehicles come and go from the parking lot next to Autumn’s loft. We sit in her car and talk, watching clumps of wet snow slide down the windshield.

  I don’t expect her to comfort me entirely. She can’t say it’s okay or it was an accident because it’s not, and it wasn’t. But she listens to me reminisce about Jake, and that’s all I need right now.

  Time.

  We laugh about the present and cry about the past, huddled inside the high collars of our coats, our hands in our pockets, legs swinging. When she looks at me and smiles, and I blush, I know that it’s going to happen. She’s about to invite me inside.

  “It’s time,” she says.

  She steps out and stands in front of the car, her hand raised in anticipation of mine. We bundle together and walk into her building, taking the stairs to the second floor.

  I continually wet my lips. Autumn does the same. It’s telling. We know what we’re about to do, and I admit that I’m nervous. The expectations tonight are different than having emotionless sex with someone who approached me at the bar. I’m under pressure to comfort, pleasure, and leave her wanting more.

  I squeeze her hand. She squeezes mine back, opening the door to her place. She locks us in and motions me to follow her to the bedroom.

  Coats drop to the floor in the hallway, and our shoes are kicked off. Then. Our eyes meet, and I’m in heaven.

  I unzip her dress and slide it off her shoulders, shivering with excitement. She unhooks her bra and removes her tights then her panties, kicking the clothes off to the side. A candle is lit, the small flame casting flickering shadows throughout the room.

  “You’ve had some dark days,” she whispers, unbuttoning my shirt and spreading her fingers across my chest. “I want to help you feel better.” She unravels her bun and lets her hair cascade down, poofing it out with her fingers, leaving it looking messy, but seductive.

  “You’re stunning,” I whisper, my eyes poring over her.

  She steps forward and touches my erection through my pants, using her other hand to cradle my cheek. “Do you want me?” She presses against me.

  “Every inch of you.”

  I pull the Glock out of the back of my pants, along with my wallet and a condom, placing everything on her nightstand. She smiles when I turn around, flip-flopping my heart when she unbuckles my belt and helps me undress. We stand naked to one another, taking simultaneous deep breaths. We’re paralyzed until she makes the first move, picking up the condom and tearing it open.

  The tension in the room disappears when she rolls it on me and says, “Six inches.”

  I push her playfully onto the bed and say, “Eight.”

  We laugh and slip under her white comforter. Her bed is cold, but her body is on fire. I kiss my way down her chest, nibbling around her navel ring while taking her breast in my hand.

  “I may never let you leave.” She moans sexily.

  I climb over top of her, staring adoringly into her eyes. “I want to be the first man who makes love to you,” I say, trying my best to make my husky voice sound tender.

  I trace her hairline and shake my head at how lucky I am to be with her tonight. The heat of her breath fans over my face as my hand slinks down her belly, dipping low between her legs.

  “Dylan.” She brings it back up to her heart. “Believe me. I’m more than ready.”

  “Okay,” I whisper.

  “Okay,” she whispers back.

  I straighten my arms and lift my upper body, giving her all the control to guide me inside. My eyes shut in drunken delight the moment I experience her warmth. “Autumn.” Her name seeps through my lips.

  “Make sure you look at me.” She raises a hand and runs her fingers along my jawline.

  I nod and kiss her deeply, relieved that she shows no signs of pain or regret once I start to move. She locks her legs around my hips and eases into my slow rhythm. The bed creaks and the candle sparks, radiating a soft light onto her reddened face.

  “It feels fantastic,” she says, grabbing my chest to direct the pace. Her open mouth is sexy, sending my eyes into a haze. I thrust faster, connecting to her energy. “Don’t stop,” she begs, arching her back and pushing her hips with mine. We send the iron headboard knocking into the wall, bodies constricting and contracting, cheeks blooming crimson red. “Kiss me,” she demands. “Kiss me, Dylan.”

  Her muscles spasm when our lips meet. She breaks free of my mouth but then instantly latches back on, needing to bury her cries.

  I frame her face in my hands, moving over her in recurrent waves. “Come … come for me,” I whisper, consuming her orgasm, suddenly overcome with my own rapid release. I sink deeper into her warmth, lost in total bliss while feeding on her lips.

  A minute passes before she looks up with a pleased smile, her eyes soft and set on mine.

  “Perfect.” She runs her foot along the back of my leg.

  “Yeah, you are perfect. I don’t want to give up being inside you.” I nestle my head into her pillow, smiling to myself. “Let’s do this as much as possible.”

  “Tonight. Definitely. As much as you can.”

  “Tonight, and for a long-ass time after tonight.” I hold the base of the condom and pull out, staggered when she pushes my hand away and rolls it off. No one’s ever done that before, but Autumn does, and she did. She slides out from under me and takes it out of the room, returning a minute later with two beers.

  I raise my eyes to the ceiling in total wonder. “I’ve found a girl who’ll take care of the condom, and get me a cold beer after sex.”

  “While naked,” she adds.

  I shake my head in disbelief and take the bottle from her hand. “Yeah, while naked. You’re not real.”

  “Maybe not.” She props the pillows alongside the headboard and sits next to me, our fingers interlaced and toes touching, clinking beer bottles before we drink.

  “This is nice,” I say.

  “It is nice. I’m comfy with you, even though you’re hiding a whole bunch of stuff from me.”

  I pretend I haven’t a clue what she’s talking about. Except I suck at keeping a straight face after sex.

  She smirks against her beer. “So you’re going back to work tomorrow?”

  Good. She changed the subject. “Yeah. Tomorrow night. I apologized to my dad for the constant fighting.”

  “Are you still doing jobs for Dorazio?”

  “Oh.” I shift. Now she’s bringing it up again. “I haven’t heard of anything going on. I mean, with any dealers. That last house should’ve been it for me.”

  “Doubt it.” She runs her foot alongside mine. “He’ll keep hounding you, and one day you’ll end up dead.”

  “Yeah, I know.” I rub my chin, debating if I should tell her that Nick ordered me to kill him. “I told Ed last year I was through, but he kept bribing me with Heather’s note. Then he threatened Sean and me. He said he’d arrest us if we wanted out, so I guess I have to wait and see what happens.”

  “What happens with what?”

  “I don’t know.” I shrug.

  “Dylan, you can tell me.”

  “Well, what about you?”

  “Me what?”

  “What does Nick have on your dad?” She holds her beer to her lips. “Autumn?” She chugs and chugs. “Autumn?” I lower the bottle from her
mouth, but she won’t answer. “I was only guessing that was the case, but by your reaction, I can tell that I’m right.”

  “You’re not.” She sets the beer on the nightstand and straddles my legs. “You talk first. I can’t imagine Nick asked for Trevor’s body and nothing else. He could’ve just had me bring it to him. I know something’s up.”

  “Nope.” I shake my head. “Nothing.”

  “Did he ask you to kill me?”

  “What?” I sit straight up. “Of course not.”

  “Then what is it?”

  “Hey, you’re holding back on me, too.”

  “True.” She twists her lips. “How about we make a deal?”

  I knock back half the beer and place the bottle next to hers on the nightstand. “What do you have in mind?”

  “You tell me about Nick, and I’ll get Dorazio off your back.”

  “Nope.”

  “Why?” She tilts her head.

  “Because you can’t get Dorazio off my back, and because I wanna hear about your dad. You talk. Then me.”

  She creeps closer, breasts hanging low. I take them in my hands and sink below her, putting one in my mouth, releasing it with a loud smack of my lips. “You’re irresistible … and you’re trying to seduce me.”

  “Also true.” She runs her fingers through my hair, leaning in close, squashing her nose to mine. “New deal. I’m going to tell you a story about Nick and Dorazio, and you’re going to tell me what Nick wants from you.”

  “Then what?”

  “Well”—she bites and tugs on my bottom lip—“as a reward, how about a long night caked in sweat with the sheets twisted around our legs?” She hooks my chin and looks me in the eye. “A hot night of sex, Dylan. Hours and hours of our naked bodies pressed together. Throbbing naked bodies. Neither one of us will be able to walk in the morning.”

  I don’t hesitate when I say, “Deal.”

  26

  Autumn Black must be a sorceress to get me to agree to this, but I trust her more than I trust the mayor. He said to keep my mouth shut. Autumn said to open it, so I opened it and told her what was up. Now all I have to do is kill Eddie Dorazio, and Autumn will take care of the rest.

  Standing in the alley next to the bar, I place my Glock in my waistband. I swiftly slide it back out, turning it from side to side, admiring its beauty. I put it away and pull it out again. “Awesome,” I whisper. I shouldn’t have it out. I put it back. I’ll take it out when Ed’s here. I have to learn to be patient.

  I shouldn’t own a gun.

  I try not to think about it, taking my cell out instead. Ed’s late. Four-fifteen in the morning, it’ll be daylight in a couple of hours.

  I smoke and pace in the alley, off my game after a night of wild sex and then a ten-hour shift at the bar. I need sleep, but I need to kill Ed to be able to sleep. I probably won’t sleep after I kill him. It’s a vicious circle.

  The streets are still, businesses are empty, and Northland is asleep under raven-black darkness. I shake my foot after stepping in a slush puddle. Water seeps into my boot and soaks through my sock. After two days of balmy forty-degree temperatures, the runoff of melted snow has risen in the streets. Icy pools are hard to avoid, the dead fish smell even harder.

  “Make it quick,” Ed says, walking into the alley with his baton swinging at his side. “Traitor.”

  I tuck my cell away and grip my gun. “Traitor? How so?”

  He stops in front of me, nudging the baton into my collarbone. “You went to the mayor’s and talked about me, didn’t you? What the fuck did you say to him? Huh?”

  “I didn’t.”

  “Don’t lie. People saw you with him.”

  “I wasn’t at the party for long, fifteen minutes tops. We didn’t talk about you, Ed. He wanted his son’s body, and that was it.”

  “Bull.” Ed’s in his usual dictatorial role, prodding me with his damn baton.

  “It’s not bull. You should’ve told me who Trevor was when you pocketed his wallet. You knew he was Nick’s son.”

  “Not my problem, Dylan.”

  “Nothing’s your problem. You don’t care about my dad or me. Just yourself.”

  “Is this why I’m here? You wanna fight about the cash from the bar? Keep it. Go ‘head. We’ll see how long you can run this place without me. Within a week you’ll be paying a gang for the same thing. Then what? They’ll ask for more next month and the month after that. You can say goodbye to your business within a year.”

  I flick my cigarette past his head. “You here alone or is Kevin with you? Where’s your Tahoe?”

  “Who gives a shit? Jesus, Dylan, I thought you had some life-or-death emergency and needed to talk in private. You want me to call him back here so you can rag on the two of us? Spit it out. What do you want?” He swings the baton at his side. “This better not be another sobbing appeal for that note.”

  I wipe my nose, eager for this to be over. All I have to do is pull the trigger. That’s it. Shoot and run. I have to do it.

  I draw the Glock and raise it between his eyes.

  “Seriously?” He laughs. “You little punk.”

  “Get down on your knees, Ed.”

  He laughs harder.

  I rack the slide. My voice lowers in pitch. “Get. Down.”

  He puts the baton in his belt and widens his stance. “You think you’re gonna shoot me? Did your wench put you up to this?”

  “Shut up.” I wave the gun at his face. “Tell me where you were that night.”

  “What night?”

  “The night Jake died. You went to the Andersons’ house in the morning, but you weren’t at the river. Why? Why didn’t you come and help the cops and the rescue team? Where the hell were you?”

  “Working, I can’t be everywhere at once.”

  “No. Sean called you after we left the party. I called you after Jake fell through the ice. What was more important than him?” I take a step closer. He sees the rage in my eyes. He gets it. This is real. He’s no longer in control of this conversation. “Answer me, Ed.” I press the muzzle to his forehead. “Don’t even think about knocking the gun away. Just answer me.”

  “Which one is on to me? Is it Nick, or Autumn?”

  “I’m on to you.”

  “Dylan, you’re not bright enough to figure any of this out on your own.”

  My palms slam his chest. He stumbles backward and twists his ankle in a pothole. “Enough.” He raises his hands. “Don’t make me kill you.” He glares up at me, slowly placing his hand on his gun as he regains his footing. “Where’d you get that gun?” He nods at it. “Does your dad know you have it?”

  “Do the cops in your department know all the drug busts you run are a scam? Do they know you get a payout from the drug lord in the district to get rid of the small-time dealers?”

  He grins and grips his gun.

  “Better not,” I say, keeping the gun pointed at his head. “You know, Ed … you know what I think happened that night?”

  “What’s that, Dylan?” He slides his gun up an inch.

  “I think a big supply came in, and I think you had to patrol the area to make sure no cops or anyone else made off with the shipment. And I think that was more important to you than Jake.”

  “Or maybe I picked up a hooker, or I was at Tim Horton’s getting a coffee, or beating my meat in my Tahoe, or maybe I was doing my fucking job!” He pulls out his gun and aims it at my chest. “Are we doing this? Are we really doing this? Because you won’t be the one who’s left standing. Face it. You’ve got one foot in the grave already. I’ll bury you like Jake got buried in that icy riv—”

  I fire the gun before he can finish. It echoes through the alley. My ears ring and the shot sends Ed to his knees. He drops his gun and collapses face-first. Red lights flash on the street as I kick his gun away. Kevin calls out to Ed, sending the Tahoe in reverse and shining the headlights down the alley. “Ed!” he shout
s. We’re too far in for him to see us. He steps out, pulling his gun, taking a stealthy walk along the alley wall toward us.

  “Sorry, Dylan,” Autumn whispers behind me.

  “What?” I turn to the opposite end of the alley. “Why are you here? You’re supposed to be waiting for me at your loft.” She’s a shadow in the darkness. “Take off before Kevin gets back here. I’ll meet up with you later.”

  A second shot rings out. My body jerks back and drops next to Ed’s. My vision turns dark even though my eyes remain open. Ed, the buildings, the sight of her as she approaches, all turn to black. I see only the sleeve of her burgundy coat as she sets her hand on my chest, sharing a sorrowful goodbye.

  She knows. Autumn knows my suffering over Heather won’t disappear with time. The only way to stop my relentless thoughts from that night will be to read her last words. I told her what Nick had to offer for killing Ed, and what the compensation would be. Not cash, just words. A note.

  Autumn’s hand slips away, her strawberry scent vanishes with it. I want to tell her to be careful, tell her how much she means to me, and thank her for putting me out of my misery. But I can’t speak. Not a word. Not a breath. Nothing. I may never see her again, and I can’t open my mouth to tell her these things.

  “Stop, police officer. Stop!” Kevin shouts. “Put your hands up where I can see ’em. Hands up!”

  She steals Ed’s cell phone and scurries away. I hear a car drive up and stop at the end of the alley. The door opens and closes, the engine revs, then the car drives off behind the buildings. Gone. Like she was just a snippet of a short dream, Autumn is gone.

  Ice water soaks through my clothing. I take a painful breath, feeling a constriction in whatever’s left of my heart. It’s the coldest I’ve ever been.

  One minute, no movement for a minute.

  Kevin heads through the slop in our direction. I turn my head toward Ed, his one eye on me, the other on Kevin.

  I’m sick to death about what I’m about to go through, but everything is to free me from the past. I need to move on because it’s not just about me anymore. I have a new motivation. Autumn. She’s my focus. When our plan was finalized, she said, “You have my heart. Now let’s set yours free.”