Love Lasts

by Savannah Totten

  All around me, students are dressed in their nicest suits, slacks, and dresses, and on top of each of our outfits is either a light blue gown or a dark blue one. My light blue gown almost drags on the ground because of how short I am, so I pick it up while I walk to avoid tripping.

  A few teachers and counselors stand on the sides of our moving line, smiling, giving us high fives, and congratulating us. I smile politely at them but mostly ignore them. Only one person is on my mind: Dane.

  He showed up to my house early this morning and waited around while my family took turns showering and slowly got ready. Then, my grandma came over, and everyone went outside to take photos with me in the front yard. We drove over to school, and I waited in line with them until I needed to go inside and find my spot among my classmates. Now Dane is sitting inside the hot gymnasium next to my family somewhere. I hope I get to see him when I finally get in there.

  The line continues to move at a snail’s pace, but soon enough, I hover at the edge of the gymnasium. Hundreds of people sit around the gymnasium, clapping and cheering for their kids and for kids they probably don’t even know, and I wonder if my family is standing too, clapping and waiting to see me.

  A few minutes later, I walk down the middle aisle of the gymnasium that’s now covered in hundreds of chairs for all the students in my class, and I walk to my seat. I spot Lin out of the corner of my eye, standing on the opposite side of the gym and watching me. She looks away when I look at her.

  After what feels like an eternity, almost five hundred of my classmates finish entering the gym, and we all remain standing in front of our seats. Like a poorly organized orchestra, three students at the front of the gym motion together for all of us to sit down, and we follow instructions.

  The ceremony goes by slowly, and I wish I could simply take my diploma and walk out of there. Our school’s best show choir performs the national anthem, and I listen to a bunch of immature boys a few rows behind me chime in, singing grossly loud. I shake my head, feeling so thankful that this is the last time I’ll be in a room with all these people. After this, my life can finally start to head in the right direction, and no one will distract me.

  After the choir performance, the principal and vice principal both give statements before handing the microphone off to the salutatorian to speak. He makes jokes and thanks everyone, but mostly, I tune him out. After he finishes speaking, we all clap, and Nelson, our valedictorian and class president, gives the final, combined speech.

  All of my classmates, including myself, begin to clap for Nelson before he even speaks because we respect him that much for how he’s impacted our class and our school. Nelson gives a humble speech and even dedicates a part of it to his parents, speaking in Spanish because they aren’t able to understand English. After his speech, everyone in the gymnasium cheers and claps, giving him a standing ovation. Nelson wipes under his eyes and waves before returning to his seat.

  Finally, the class vice president comes on stage to announce the graduates, and the first row of students stand up. She begins calling names one by one, and each student walks across the stage, shaking hands and taking an empty diploma.

  When my row stands, I finally feel a bit of nerves hit my stomach. I walk slowly toward the stage. As each graduate’s name is called, they walk across the stage. When I’m standing at the edge of the stairs leading up the stage, I finally spot my family and smile at them, even though they probably can’t tell. My name is called, and I ascend the stairs and cross the stage. I shake hands with my principal, vice principal, and superintendent, and I take my empty diploma. Then, I walk down the steps on the other side of the stage and walk back to my seat. I look up to where I saw my family, and they all smile and clap for me. I smile back and wave to them before sitting in my seat.

  Then, I impatiently wait for four hundred more names to be called before the end of the ceremony.

  “Congratulations,” Mom says when we find each other. A crowd of hundreds of people surround us, so I speak loudly.

  “Thank you.” I give her a hug and then go down the line, hugging my dad, my grandma, and finally, Dane.

  “I’m so glad you’re here,” I say in Dane’s ear. People all around us take photos and try to find friends and family, but my family only stands and looks at each other.

  “So are you guys going to go out to eat?” Mom asks Dane and I.

  “Yeah, I think we will,” I say, looking to Dane for confirmation. He nods.

  “Okay, great. Well then we’ll see you at home, okay? We’re going to get out of this mess of people,” Mom says.

  “Okay, thank you guys for being here,” I say.

  “Of course, dork,” my dad says, smiling. I smile and wave them goodbye. They start to walk away, so I look at Dane.

  “Hi,” I say.

  “Hi,” he replies, smiling sweetly. “Is there anyone you want to see before we leave?” I shake my head.

  “No, let’s get out of here.” I follow him, gripping onto his hand so as not to lose him in the crowd until we get to where he parked. We get in, and he instantly leans over and gives me a deep kiss. I lean back and catch my breath.

  “What was that for?” I ask.

  “I’m proud of you,” Dane says.

  “Thank you.”

  “Honestly,” Dane says, “I could never imagine doing what you’ve done in the last couple of months. Planning our wedding and taking senior portraits and working and keeping straight A’s.” Dane smiles. “You’re amazing.”

  “Thank you,” I say, placing my hand on my heart and smiling back. “I’m so glad you’re here with me now.”

  “Me too,” Dane says.

  Dane and I go to Applebee’s for dinner, and then he drops me off at home.

  ✦✦✦

  Two days later, I’m standing at the edge of a pool, surrounded by dozens of people I don’t know and only a few that I do know. Dane and his family sit on the grass closest to me, and I smile nervously at Dane.

  “Next up is Penelope. Penelope, come on up here,” Craig, my pastor, says, motioning for me to join him in the pool of water. I tug on my shorts, suddenly feeling self conscious in front of all these people, but I step into the water and instantly feel cooled off. The sun beats down on the back of my neck, and sweat rests on the top of my forehead. I only feel a little nervous.

  “Now, let me tell you a fun fact about Penelope,” Craig says, “In one week’s time, Penelope will get baptized, graduate from high school, marry her fiancé, Dane Sutton, and move across the country. So everybody pray for her because she could write a book about this one day.” The crowd of Christians clap and cheer for me, even though most of them have probably never spoken to me before and probably still won’t even after this. I give the crowd two thumbs up and smile.

  “So, Penelope, are you ready to get baptized?” Craig asks me, and I nod.

  “Yes.” I step down further into the water, and Craig hands the mic to someone else to hold for him while he gets in place to baptize me.

  “Do you, Penelope, accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior?” Craig asks.

  “Yes.”

  “Based on your profession of faith, I baptize you in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit,” Craig says, and I cross my arms across my chest.

  Then, I’m suddenly extremely nervous about being dunked under the water without plugging my nose. Hopefully, the water doesn't go up my nose and make me cough when I come back up for air. Craig quickly dunks me under water, and I come out to hear the crowd clapping and cheering for me once again. The water didn’t go up my nose, and now, a big smile covers my face. Now, I’ve publicly declared my belief of Jesus, and I couldn’t be happier.

  Craig pats me on the back and whispers a “congratulations.” I smile and step out of the pool, receiving a towel in one hand and Dane’s hand in the other. We walk back to his family, who all smile from ear to ear.

  “How do you feel?” Dane asks.

  “Great,” I admit, �
��That cooled me off.” Dane laughs.

  “Yeah, I bet.”

  Everyone is dismissed to head inside and eat some food that was prepared, so I head for the bathroom to change into dry clothes. When I come out, the only way people can tell I was baptized is by my wet hair. A few strangers congratulate me, and I thank each of them. When I find Dane inside with a plate of food ready for me, I smile and sit with him.

  “So, what are we going to do next week?” Dane asks. I look off into the distance, purse my lips, and tap my head like I’m deep in thought.

  “Oh, not much‒just getting married and moving across the country together.”

  ✦✦✦

  The next five days, Dane spends time with friends and family who he hasn’t seen in months, and I spend my time packing and planning for the move.

  “So your flight is on the fourth?” Dad asks. I nod.

  “We leave around noon,” I say. Mom paces around the room, and Dad stares at her.

  “Hey, can you stop?” Dad asks. Mom looks between the both of us and finally sits down with a loud sigh.

  “This will cost more money that we don’t have,” Mom says. Dad looks at her intensely.

  “We have the money. It’s fine. Stop worrying so much and help me figure out the plan here,” he says.

  “Fine. It’s is a thirty hour drive according to Google.”

  The one thing we didn’t think about if I was going to move across the country was how I’m going to get all of my things across the country. So over the last week, my parents have been brainstorming ideas. The idea that seems to be sticking is that my parents will drive my car from Indianapolis to Spokane, Washington with all of my belongings in it. I feel a bit guilty with this plan because it means my parents are doing all the hard work and spending more money on me, but there aren’t a lot of other options because Dane and I already have plane tickets.

  “So we’ll need to book a hotel room for a night,” Mom continues.

  “No. We can drive the whole way,” Dad says.

  “Seriously? That is too long of a drive to go without a good night of sleep in the middle,” Mom says.

  “I played Warcraft for twenty four hours straight back in the day. I think I can handle it,” Dad says. Mom looks at me and rolls her eyes, but I don’t say anything.

  “Fine. So then what? We get there. And do we fly back or drive back with a rental? The drive there will be $300 or more in gas, and plane tickets could be very expensive,” Mom says.

  My parents talk for another half an hour, deciding what their plan of action is, and I sit and listen to the majority of it without offering any input. There’s not much I can do about the situation, but I’m relieved after they’ve figured it all out.

  “So you need to pack enough clothes for at least a week and anything you may absolutely need in your suitcases. The rest will be packed and brought to you by the next weekend,” Dad tells me. So I start packing.

  CHAPTER 23

  “I would die for some hashbrowns right now,” I announce dramatically to the room full of girls.

  My family and my bridesmaids arrived at church at seven this morning to get ready for the wedding, and I thought I would be too nervous to eat. But my stomach isn’t filled with nerves at all; I’m just hungry.

  The girls all laugh at me, but Peyton looks at me with a straight face.

  “Do you seriously want some? I’ll get you some,” she says, and I laugh.

  “I don’t want you to have to leave,” I say, but she immediately pulls out her phone and starts typing away.

  “Would you guys want some donuts?” Peyton asks the group. Beth and Allie scream that they do, and everyone else looks at them with wide eyes.

  “I’ll take that as a yes,” Peyton says and starts typing again. I watch her until she finishes, and she smiles at me.

  “They’ll be here in 25 minutes.”

  “You’re amazing,” I say, smiling. Mom walks in with our photographer and hair stylist close behind, and I stand up to welcome them.

  “It’s your big day,” my photographer says, giving me a one-sided hug, “How do you feel?”

  “I feel good,” I say and shake my hair stylist’s hand. “Nice to meet you.”

  “I’m so excited for you,” she says in a high-pitched voice. She sets up all her curling wands and brushes on one side of the room, and my girls migrate to the other side, turning down the Beyoncé music a little bit.

  Beth and Allie continue to jam out, singing along to every song they know. Meanwhile, Peyton does her makeup, and my cousin, Susan, sits on her phone. I have no idea what normal pre-wedding activities there are besides getting ready, so I hope I’m not making this too boring. My little sister, Jessica, already wears her navy blue dress and matching sneakers, and I wave at her. She looks at me with narrow eyes but waves back and then continues playing with her basket of rose petals. Mom comes over to me with a sympathetic look on her face.

  “You doing okay? You look flustered,” she says.

  “No, yeah, I’m good. Peyton has someone bringing us hash browns and donuts,” I say, smiling.

  “Awesome,” she says.

  I really am doing fine. I expected to be a lot more nervous about the day running smoothly, but it’s such a laid back wedding that I’m not worrying at all. Plus, it’s my day to shine. Hopefully, all the logistics will be handled by everyone else now.

  Twenty minutes later, the food arrives on cue, and Peyton runs outside to get it. We destroy the hash browns but leave half a dozen donuts uneaten.

  Monty, Dane’s best man, and the rest of his party start arriving at the church about an hour later, and by that time, we’ve started applying our makeup and doing our hair with the hair stylist one at a time. I still don’t feel the slightest bit nervous, which is surprising to me, but I’m also not jumping with joy. All the changes, from graduating to getting baptized to getting married to moving, are finally piling heavy on my shoulders; I’ll be content when the stress subsides.

  The photographer escorts my group out of the room a couple times to take individual shots and group shots while we’re wearing our matching robes, but she makes sure none of the guys are around to see us beforehand. Dane and I agreed we wouldn’t see each other until the moment the wedding started, and I’m sticking to it. I always dreamed that he will cry when he sees me in my wedding dress, so holding off the moment as long as possible might help to make that happen.

  For a few more hours, my best friends and I sit around and get ready. We sing and dance, and I even let them read my vows, which makes Peyton look emotional. The girls make me smile and laugh, and their excitement encourages me to enjoy this day a little more. Letting go of control is difficult for me, but today, I need to do exactly that. I have to let go and stop worrying that something could go wrong, and instead, I need to enjoy this day because this is the only wedding I’m ever going to get. This is the only day I’m ever going to be a bride. And Dane deserves my best.

  Imagining him out there, wearing his dress blues and waiting for me, makes my heart melt. His commitment to me through our relationship never faulted, and the fact that he knew so early on that he wanted to marry me and spend the rest of our lives together blows me away. I was uncertain for awhile. The fights made me doubtful, but after the last week together, my faith in us is renewed. We are meant to spend the rest of our lives together, and I couldn’t be more ready for it.

  Finally, it’s time for me to put my dress on, so I walk into the bathroom with my mom. Mascara accents her eyes, and her hair sits in a pretty curled updo. She looks beautiful, and now, it’s my turn. Mom helps me step into the dress and then buttons me up slowly.

  Then, I turn around, and she smiles. Her eyes fill with tears.

  “You look beautiful,” she says. I smile and check myself out in the mirror. My own hair is also in an updo, and my face is covered in a light makeup. My dress fights tightly at the top but flows beautifully at the bottom, and I know for sure I picked the right
dress.

  I walk out of the bathroom a minute later, and everyone gasps and smiles when they see me. Peyton comes up to hug me.

  “You’re going to make me cry,” she says to me with eyes full of tears. All the girls walk around me in circles, taking turns complimenting me and hugging me, and my heart is already full to the brim. The wedding itself might make my heart burst.

  “Are you ready?” Mom asks me half an hour later. She looks a bit teary eyed, but that’s understandable. The moment of me being married is coming faster than I expected, and although I know what’s to come, nothing could really prepare me for all the emotions I’m about to feel.

  “Yeah,” I say and follow her out the door to meet my dad. This is the first time I’ve ever seen him in a suit, and I must admit he looks nice and sophisticated. His face is shaven, and his eyes shine brighter than I’ve ever seen them. Mom gives me a hug and then gives Dad a quick kiss before heading towards the sanctuary to be seated by one of the groomsman.

  “Give me a second,” Dad says, walking towards the water fountain. He takes a drink and breathes deeply. When he comes back to me, his eyes are full of tears and red around the edges. I smile and feel myself getting choked up too. I take his arm, and he leads me towards the sanctuary. The doors are closed, but two of my brothers stand on each side, waiting to open it up and reveal me. My mind is blank.

  Finally, the nerves I was resisting the whole morning set into my stomach, so I breathe deeply and nod at my brothers. They open the doors in unison, as the wedding music starts.