My Demons (The Angel Trilogy #2)

by Kimberly Blalock

  “Wait, I don’t have your number.” I hurry.

  “It’s in your phone,” she answers walking down the hallway.

  I step back into my room grabbing my phone that’s sitting on the dresser. I scroll through to the N’s and see her name and number. “How the hell?” I have no idea how she did that without me knowing or being aware in some way.

  “Knock, knock,” my mom says as she’s entering my room. “Who was that?” she asks approaching me.

  We sit on the bench and she hands me a cup of coffee. “Thank you.” I smile my best fake smile.

  “Tell me. Who was she?” She eyes me curiously.

  I shrug. “Just a friend.”

  “Oh.” She nods. “Have you heard from Evan?”

  I look down, tapping my fingers on the large white mug. “No.” I shake my head.

  “I see. And you don’t think he could just be working? You said his job is crazy.”

  I take a deep breath. Hearing my phone notifications. “Yea, it is.” I look at the bright screen.

  Natalia: Don’t say anything about our chat. Don’t want it getting to the wrong person.

  Abby: K.

  Natalia: Call me when you’re ready.

  I wasn’t going to say anything. I lock my phone.

  “Everything, ok?”

  I squint my brows. “Oh yeah, I’m fine.”

  Chapter Twenty

  Abby

  The minutes have turned into hours, which have turned into days. I woke this morning unsure of my future and now I wonder about the next few hours hidden in the cracks of my fate. Fate’s a bitch and has taken a bit of a ridiculous turn for me. This seems to happen about every five minutes or so, and I’d like to kick fate in her high-class ass.

  “What’re you going to do?” Amy asks as she’s running a brush through my hair. I shrug and wipe away a tear that inevitably finds the light. I feel sick to my stomach these days. “What would make you feel better? I could find him and kick his ass for you,” she grunts. “You know I could, I’m a badass.” She completely loses it tugging my hair as she’s in hysterics laughing.

  I laugh so hard I snort from my nose. “You’re the best friend I could ever have.” I end in a tearful display. I turn and grab her neck holding on for dear life.

  “I’m so sorry Abby, it's all right,” She sings.

  I feel pain in my stomach. I feel lost, unconnected, but determined to find out what happened. I’ve spent the last week wondering what I did to make Evan leave me. “We were doing so well, and then I woke up and he was gone. I haven’t received any phone calls, texts, and I don’t know what to think. I don’t understand what I did wrong?”

  “It’s ok Abby, it’s going to be all right.” She squeezes me tighter. “I need to get you out of this funk. Do you want to have dinner and just get out of your PJ’s? You need a shower.” She holds her nose for the full effect.

  “I never want to get out of my pajamas again.” I wipe my running nose with the tissue I’ve been mindlessly holding onto.

  Amy takes a deep breath. “Listen, you can’t do this to yourself every time something bad happens, Abby. You have to get up and shake it off.”

  My eyes meet Amy’s, but there not feeling warm and fuzzy over her response. “Amy you do the same thing only you’re making yourself throw up every time you have a problem. So please don’t give me your line of bullshit.” I stand from the place on the floor.

  Amy’s face is flat and I see that she’s conflicted with the response she wants to give. “I… I don’t,” is all she ends with standing and walking out of my bedroom closing the door a little harder than normal behind her.

  I drop to the floor again with my face landing in my palms. I didn’t mean to upset her, but I needed to say something to her eventually. I know how pathetic I am. I don’t need her to tell me, even if she doesn’t mean it to make me feel as tiny as a penny, she did. The thing that pisses me off the most is I know she’s right. I’ve been in this room for days. My mom and dad have attempted to get me out of here, but I haven’t wanted to leave.

  Maybe a run would be good. I need to clear my head so maybe that’s exactly what I need right now.

  “And for your information, I hurt too Abby. So stop thinking you’re the only one,” Amy huffs in my doorway having just jerked the door back open and then closing it again.

  “Wait, Amy I’m sorry.” I hurry out the door. “I’m being a bitch I’m sorry. Forgive me?”

  She just turns on her heels and grabs me into her arms. “I’m sorry too.”

  “Hey, let's go running and then hang out the rest of the day. I’ll even take a shower.” I laugh in between sobs.

  “Sounds good.”

  “Be ready in thirty.” I turn and sprint to my bedroom. As I close my bedroom door I hear my phone buzzing on the marble top of my dresser. When I pick it up, I see the same unknown number I’ve seen repeatedly over the last few months.

  Unknown: Little teases get what they deserve… eventually.

  I take a deep breath and throw my phone. I want to respond and scream because I’ve once again had my number changed, and yet, whoever this is still sending me the same fucked up threatening messages.

  I haven’t changed it since Evan left though because I’m afraid that he will try to call, and if it’s changed then he can’t, so I’ll endure it and wait.

  I pad through my large bedroom entering my bathroom and stripping off my pajamas opening the glass doors to my shower.

  Evan is the only man in my thoughts from the time that I wake up till I fall into my dreams. I lather my hair with the organic vanilla shampoo and close my eyes wondering if he’s thinking about me too.

  All I want to do is live my life with him. I don’t know where he is, but I know he’ll come back to me. On days like this I need him more than ever. I want him to touch me with his big strong hands. I want him to cup my breast and lick my nipples that harden at the very sight of him.

  I open my closed eyes realizing I’m leaning up against the tile wall with one hand on my breast and the other between my legs. I continue to imagine he’s touching me there. I love the way his tongue dips in and out when he kisses me in that sweet spot. It puts me on the edge every time. His hands grip my thighs tight as he takes control.

  I love that fierce control he’s so known for. I don’t need to control him. I only need my big strong man to hold me, devour me, and lick me into his submission. Giving him the control actually gives me a great deal of satisfaction. I’m controlling my control and I willingly give it over to him. I willingly lay down and take what he gives me which is always a dream come true.

  My fingers are finding the gem of my orgasm as I imagine that Evan’s tongue is continuing to lick me. My finger slides to my entrance and slowly dips inside. “Ahh,” I moan grabbing for the towel bar to my side. I lift my leg resting my foot on the bench. My body is swaying side to side as I find my pleasure wishing his big length was shoved hard inside of me.

  My hips move in harmony with my fingers leaving me to wish his hands were hard on my ass. “Evan,” I cry squeezing my breast with my free hand. I pinch my nipple imagining his teeth are biting hard and that has me coming undone under the hot water that’s slamming against my naked flesh. I come, screaming Evan’s name hoping that no one hears me. But honestly not caring if anyone does because this house is huge and I know no one will.

  I press my hands against the wall of the shower enjoying the hot water as I catch my breath. I didn’t realize the need I had for release was so strong and damn did I need that.

  I continue with my shower lathering my body with the body wash. My eyes wonder to the light that beams in through the windows.

  Maybe he had work to do? I know that he does some crazy stuff for work sometimes, maybe he just can’t call me. Yea, that’s it. I can’t worry about him. He’s ok and he’ll be home soon. I know he’ll be disappointed if he goes home and I’m not there. Shit! I hadn’t thought about that. Maybe I should g
o home? It doesn’t really feel like my home. I take a deep breath as I rinse away the suds.

  I wrap a towel around my body and toss my hair in another towel. I stop in front of the vanity looking at the pale display reflected in the mirror. “Oh God, I do need to get out of this house.” I sigh.

  I slather the moisturizer on my face and toss the towel that holds snug to my body toward the shower door. I enter the enormous closet and snag my workout top and pants from the shelves. I’m ready in no time, just needing to brush out my hair and tie it up on top of my head.

  “What’s the plan?” Amy questions entering my room without knocking. I roll my eyes. Some things will never change with this girl.

  “Umm, I don’t know. I guess we run and hang out.” I shrug as I toss my wet hair into a messy bun.

  “Yea, we’ll just see what happens I guess. Wait, can you run yet?” She points.

  Oh my God, if one more person asks me a question like that I’m going to snap. I’m seriously PMS-ing lately, and I don’t have the patience for this. “I guess.” I fake a smile.

  “Damn, your bitchy, doll.”

  Amy’s wearing yoga pants and a sweatshirt. Her hair’s held in a high pony and she’s adorable. Very Barbie-like.

  “Let’s go.” I grab for my phone that’s hidden behind a pillow where I’d thrown it earlier and flip the light switch closing the door behind me.

  “I can’t keep up with you, hold on,” Amy huffs out of breath.

  I slow my pace and look behind me. “Out of shape are you?” She isn’t out of energy because she’s out of shape. She’s out of energy because she hasn’t kept anything down, but she isn’t going to admit that to me. Amy is my rock and she knows it. I’m sure she’s feeling overwhelmed, but I’m a big girl and I have to find my own footing.

  Honestly, it’s time she stops using my problems as an excuse for something, that if she doesn’t stop soon is going to kill her. Eating disorders aren’t something that I have any real knowledge of, but I think it’s time to tell my parents because this is something I think they can help with. I love Amy and I know that they love her too.

  I want to call her out on it. I know that I kind of did earlier, but I mean call her out in an intervention kind of way. I think it would be best to let my parents do that because I feel like this is way too dangerous a situation for me to just jump in and save the day. I’m in no way capable of saving anyone’s day right now.

  Amy’s holding her side, something she never would’ve had to do while running if she had been taking care of herself. I know she’s depleting her body and it scares the shit out of me.

  I’ve slowed my pace way down and I feel my heart rate slowing with the gentle pace. Sweat’s running down my neck and I feel it pool between my breast. I see a fountain about fifty-feet away so I head that way.

  “Wow, I need to get back in shape, I guess.” She raises her brows catching her breath as we stop. “What?” she asks in defensive mode.

  I shake my head sipping the water from the fountain. I reach down to re-tie my shoe, wondering when my life will be drama free for more than a day. I see this going to a dark corner of the universe and I’m scared for her.

  Amy’s phone buzzes and she reaches into her pocket to answer it. She walks away to speak to whoever it is, and I wonder why.

  I stand to stretch out my very overworked body.

  “Ready?” she asks.

  “I guess.” I shrug.

  “I have something that I have to do tonight, rain check?” She bats her eyes in my direction, hoping I’ll forgive her for ditching me.

  “Umm sure, what’s up?”

  “I just have something to do, no biggie.” Well, I guess it’s another night alone in my room sounds good anyway. I smile grateful to some length.

  Since I haven’t been allowed to drive, Amy had driven us to the park. Amy’s quiet on the walk back to her car. When we reach the red, two-door Audi, I reach for the door looking over my shoulder when I hear another car parking next to me.

  What I see has me questioning my sanity. A gray sedan with dark windows holds the spot next to us. This is very similar to the car that I’ve seen many times in the last few months. I try not to make direct eye contact with my reflection shining right back at me from the window and instead quickly turn and get into the car. A chill runs through my body and I know I need to get away. I don’t know why I feel like this, but I know I should worry.

  “I really need to…” I hear Amy talk, but I’m not paying attention as she goes on about something. “So, I’ll see you tomorrow and we’ll do something fun,” I catch the last part of what she says.

  “Umm… yeah, I guess.” My nerves are in knots now.

  “You ok, doll?” She turns her head questioning my sudden mood shift. “You’re white as a ghost.”

  “Yeah, I’m good.” I don’t want to worry her.

  The drive home is filled with a lot of Pink and Fergie. I like them, but it’s not what I listen to so much. I prefer listening to Christina Perry or Jem. As she pulls up in the driveway, I see my parents getting into my father’s car. When they see us, they both step back out. I grab my bag and open the door. “Hey.” I wave.

  “We’ll be back soon. Frank’s left you something to eat in the oven and he and Sue are off the rest of the night.”

  Finally some alone time. “Sounds great.” I smile.

  My mom pulls my face to hers kissing my forehead. “You’ll be all right?” She eyes me.

  I nod. “Defiantly.”

  “Great. We will see you later, baby girl.” She opens the door sitting in her seat.

  Amy has already gone into the house. I watch as my dad’s car pulls out of the driveway and then walk to the front doors. My phone dings in my bag.

  Unknown: When you least expect it, you’ll get what you deserve.

  Are you fucking kidding me? Shit, I think I need to show someone these messages. Before I even have a chance to take a deep breath from the crazy text my phone rings showing Marco’s name and I wonder if I should answer it.

  The screen reads Marco’s name and I wonder if I should answer it. “Hello?” I hesitate.

  “Hey baby, how are you?” His Brazilian accent rings in my ears.

  “I’m great,” I lie.

  “Really?” he questions. “What are your plans looking like tonight?” Oh God.

  “Umm, I’m actually really busy.” I sigh. I’m not interested. I want Evan to come back to me.

  “I understand. I just want to talk to you for a few minutes and then I’m heading to Brazil.” He sighs. “Just a few minutes? Please.”

  I fall into the oversized chair in my parents’ living room throwing my feet up onto the ottoman. “Just a few minutes?” I ask, I hate him, he makes me sick since I got the photos of him with other women that someone had sent to my phone.

  “I promise.”

  “I’m staying at my parents’ right now.” He’s silent for a few seconds too long. “Hello?”

  “Yeah, I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.”

  “Ok.” I press the red button tossing my phone on the table. “Shit.”

  Amy yells from the front door as I’m heading to the kitchen for a bottled water. “I’ll be back tomorrow, doll.” She closes the door behind her. “What’s that girl up to these days?” I ask mindlessly. I decide to check out the contents in the oven when the doorbell rings across the house. “Didn’t you remember your key?” I run to the door swinging it open seeing that it’s not Amy.

  “I didn’t know I had one.” Marco smiles.

  “Wow, do you have a helicopter or something? You got here so quickly,” I ask seeing a sports car in the driveway.

  He laughs. “No, I was in the neighborhood.”

  I nod. “Come in.” I gesture inside the house. “Would you like a water or something else to drink?”

  “No, but thanks.” He smiles.

  I lead the way into the living room “What’s up, Marco?”

  “Hey
.” He reaches for my arm. “Why are you acting so different?” He pulls me into him and I freak. “It’s just me.” I back away. “You used to be all over me.”

  “What? Me, different? No, definitely not,” I lie because I am acting weird. I don’t feel right having another man touch me. I love Evan and I always will.

  A smile pulls at his lips. “Good, I don’t want you to think you need to be.” His hand releases the touch he still has even at the slight distance. Walking backward tilting his head to the side, he picks up a silver frame. “You were so beautiful in this picture, Abby.” What he doesn’t know is that picture isn’t of me. It’s of Addie.

  I nod, crossing my arms over my chest. “Thanks.” Get to the point. “So… tell me, what’s on your mind?”

  “I’m planning to leave for Brazil.” He links his hands together placing them on his head. “I could stay though.” He walks the distance I’ve managed to gain by stepping back. “I could take you with me or I could stay here.”

  I ask myself what I’m going to do when he reaches me. Is he going to expect me to invite him into my heart or my bed? Do I want to do that? No, I definitely do not want that. I know I don’t. Why does guilt always smother me when he’s around though? Guilt that I should give him another chance? Maybe its closure, maybe I need closure.

  “Abby? What would you like? What would make you happy?” When his hands wrap around my waist, I freeze, I don’t know what to do or say.

  I haven’t considered being with him, an option for so long, for a reason. I haven’t told him about the pictures and I won’t. I also don’t know how to tell him no when he’s being so soft and gentle. Not because I’m considering it, I just don’t want to hurt his feelings, although he didn’t consider mine when he did all of the things that he did.

  Marco grabs my arm surprising me as he brings my body to his. I lift my arms into his chest shoving myself away, but he doesn’t loosen his grip. “No. I can’t do this.” I admit, he’s holding a smile and I think he’s good with my decision, but then he shakes his head. The smile turns dark and scary. I shudder. He makes a clicking sound with his tongue.