Shattered Souls

by Mary Lindsey

  I took a deep breath as I made it up the stairs to the restaurant deck, but before I could round the corner to the patio, something scratched my back and cold air blasted my neck. It stung like the scratch had broken the skin. I clapped a hand to my spine under my windbreaker. Blood. Terrified, I stared at my crimson fingers.

  “Surrender to me.”

  “Never!” I yelled.

  The thing’s laughter rang over the pounding pulse in my ears. I realized in horror that I hadn’t told my mom good-bye. I was going to die, and I hadn’t even said good-bye. . . . Just like Dad.

  “I will have you. You are mine. Surrender.”

  “You’ll never have me! I’ll never surrender!”

  A sharp pain shot up my abdomen. I watched as drops of blood seeped through my shirt. Run! I yanked off the highheeled shoes. I could hear it laughing as I bounded down the patio stairs two at a time into the parking lot. Run! I had to get away. Another slash across my stomach.

  “Never!” I screamed as I ran between the cars toward the Ferris wheel. A horrible ripping sensation filled my body—like Velcro ripping out my insides. Alden was right. These weren’t just voices. Somehow this voice was making me bleed. It had entered my body. And now I was housing its soul.

  SIX

  I collapsed next to a pickup truck in the parking lot and curled in a ball on the pavement.

  Get out! the voice in my head shouted.

  I remembered Alden telling me that a Malevolent would take my body to use as its own if it could force me out. “No,” I gasped, barely able to speak because of the burning pain filling me from head to toe. I focused on staying conscious and in control. It felt like the thing was trying to make me move against my will.

  I could see the steps to the restaurant where I had been attacked. People were laughing on the patio, unaware that things like this lived among them. Or lived inside me, as it were. What would it do if I let go and allowed it to take over? Would it kill someone? Would it live as me?

  Now that I wasn’t struggling to stay on my feet, I felt stronger. Maybe knowing the stakes allowed me to control it.

  “What do you want?” I asked it.

  You.

  Gee, I’d have never guessed that one. “Why?”

  To kill my cheating wife.

  Was I supposed to try to talk him out of it? Alden had mentioned resolving issues for these dead guys. “I’m not going to help you with that.”

  You don’t need to. Get out.

  A painful tugging sensation began at my extremities, like I was being pulled on from the inside. He was trying to force me out. I tried to scream, but nothing came out, at least nothing I could hear over the carnival music and the rattling and roars of the roller-coaster cars as they plummeted, packed with screaming passengers.

  The orange glow of the setting sun reflected off the sparkles in the concrete and shiny car surfaces. It would be so easy to let go and allow him to take over. No. I had to hang on.

  “Rose?” Alden’s voice sounded close. Maybe a row over. “I feel you; don’t give up. I’m here.”

  “Alden.” My lips moved, but no sound came out.

  He rounded the corner of the aisle of cars, running toward me like a beautiful avenging angel.

  “Rose, I’m here. Hold on.”

  I made a groaning sound. It wasn’t my voice. It was deeper. “She’s gone,” it said through my mouth as my body sat up against my will.

  Alden took me by the shoulders, but I didn’t feel his touch. “Rose! Are you ready for me to come in?”

  “She’s gone!” the foreign voice screamed from my body.

  “Rose!” He shook me. “Rose. Let me in!”

  I sucked in a deep breath and concentrated on regaining control of my body. “Alden.” The voice was weak, but mine. The thing seemed to be getting weaker.

  He took my face in his hands. “Rose. Now?” I had no idea what he was asking me. Everything was garbled and fuzzy. “I’m sorry.” His voice broke. “I should have told you the protocol. You have to say yes. I need permission to enter the vessel. Consent. You have to be ready to end negotiations with the Malevolent.”

  Negotiations? I closed my eyes. It was taking too much effort to keep them open.

  “Don’t you dare give up on me!” he shouted. “Rose . . . Lenzi! Now? Say yes, dammit!”

  He’d used my real name. My voice was soft, frail. “Yes.”

  I felt like a punching bag turned inside out. I’d no idea what Alden was doing, but the thing in my body screamed like it was being hurt.

  After a ripping sensation, the screaming and jostling stopped, and I opened my eyes. The translucent form of a middle-aged man stood over me, his face contorted with hate. I watched with morbid amazement as he was swallowed up in a cloud of blackness, all the time cursing me. Impenetrable, opaque, final blackness.

  It was over. I was safe.

  I sat up and leaned on the door of the pickup. Alden was sitting on the concrete next to me. Another wave of pain shot through me, then Alden took a deep breath.

  “Are you okay?” he asked as he stood and brushed the gravel off of the back of his jeans.

  “Yeah, I think so. Is it gone?”

  “You bet. So gone. As gone as they get.”

  I began to cry. “I tried. I really tried, Alden. I didn’t know what to do. He just kept telling me to get out.” I wanted him to comfort me. I needed him to put his arms around me and hold me. Instead, he pulled out his car keys.

  “You did your best. That’s all you can do. Move on. You’ll get the next one.” He held his hand out to help me up. I stood without it.

  “I don’t want a next one. One is enough.” My body ached like I was covered in bruises.

  He sighed. “Let’s go. You need to go home and clean up.”

  I straightened my skirt. “I need to go back to Zak. Thanks anyway.”

  “You need to let me help you. You can’t do this alone, and your boyfriend won’t be able to help.” Alden reached for me, but dropped his hand when I took a step away. “Your soul feels wrong. And you look terrible.”

  The extra Xanax must have been too much. I squinted to pull him back into focus. “Thanks, you really know how to compliment a girl.” I wobbled slightly as I spun around to return to the restaurant. Zak had probably freaked out when he found me gone.

  Alden fell into step beside me. “We need to stay together. Something’s not right.”

  I swayed as exhaustion trickled through my limbs. “Ow.” I stopped to knock off a tiny pebble that had stuck to the ball of my bare foot. A wave of nausea rolled through me when I saw the raw bottoms of my feet.

  “Do you want me to carry you?” Alden offered.

  “No. She doesn’t.” Zak’s low voice rumbled. I took a deep breath and straightened. Zak was right in front of me, holding my red shoes. He looped his finger through the heel straps and held them out to me. “Kinda like Cinderella, but different, huh, Lenzi?”

  I took the shoes and looked from one guy to the other. The air almost crackled with testosterone.

  “You’re the guy from the cemetery,” Zak said, fists clenched.

  Alden moved closer to me and smiled. “Yes, I am. Very good, Zak.”

  Everything seemed fuzzy. So tired. “Zak. He was helping me.”

  Zak took another step closer, shaking with rage. “I bet he was.”

  The dizziness made it hard to stand. “I had a bad episode with the voices. I freaked out and ran down here. He found me and helped me.”

  “That’s quite a coincidence, isn’t it, lenzi?” Zak said.

  I swayed a little bit. Alden put his hands on my waist and leaned me against a truck. I held on to the edge of the truck bed for balance.

  “Get your hands off of her,” Zak growled. “I’ll take it from here.”

  This was a disaster. Panic squeezed my chest, and I gulped for air. I had to do something before they started fighting.

  Alden placed his hand over mine on the truck bed and
a soothing calm radiated up my arm. The panic ebbed away, and I could breathe. Alden gave my hand a squeeze. “Now, listen to me, Zak. I’m taking Lenzi home, and you’re going to just walk away. You can’t help her, but I can.”

  “Walk away, huh?” Zak squared off like he was going to throw a punch. “She’s coming with me.”

  The soothing energy flowing up my arm increased as Alden spoke. “I’ve known her a long time and understand what’s happening. You can’t help her.”

  Zak took a stride closer. “I said get your hands off of her.”

  “Why don’t we let Lenzi decide?” Alden’s stance was casual, but his voice had a hard edge.

  “There is no decision,” Zak said. “She’s here with me.”

  I pulled my hand away from Alden. “Shut up! Both of you!” To my amazement, they did. My vision blurred. I squinted to focus on Zak’s face. He wanted to help me, but the Xanax wasn’t working on the voices anymore. Alden knew something about all of this. He made the thing leave my body. I needed answers so I didn’t end up like Dad. “I’m sorry, Zak. This isn’t about being my boyfriend. This is about stopping the voices. Alden can help me with that.”

  As Zak’s face faded in and out of focus, I realized I’d probably just lost not only my boyfriend, but the only real friend I had left.

  Even holding on to the truck, I couldn’t remain upright. Before I crumpled, Alden scooped me up in his arms. I wanted to protest, but couldn’t remember why. I tried to speak, but found myself unable to do anything except lay my head against Alden’s shoulder and close my eyes.

  SEVEN

  The familiar lullaby of my ticking clock made it hard to open my eyes as the sweet smell of Mom’s lilac shampoo drifted into my room. Time for school. I raised my arms over my head until the sharp pain on my belly cut my stretch short.

  “Good morning.” Alden’s voice was barely above a whisper.

  I froze, heart racing, then rolled over. He was sitting in the corner at my desk, barely visible in the dim light. I shot a look at my open door. Mom would freak if she knew a guy was in my bedroom.

  “It’s all right. She’s in the shower.”

  I pulled the covers up to my chin. “What are you doing here?” I whispered.

  “My job.” He picked up an origami frog I’d made from a report card and held it in his palm. “Don’t worry. Everything’s okay.”

  The shower knob squeaked as Mom turned it off. My belly stung when I sat up. “You’ve gotta get out of here. Mom’ll kill me if she finds you. I’m not allowed to have boys in my room.”

  “I like that policy.” He grinned and gently placed the frog back on my desk next to the menagerie of other origami figures.

  Mom’s dresser drawer creaked open, then slammed shut. “Lenzi! Time to get up and get dressed for school,” she called from her bedroom.

  “Not today,” Alden whispered, backing into the shadows in the corner of my room.

  “What am I supposed to do?” I whispered as the latch on my closet clicked. Oh, great. I had a guy hiding in my closet. Perfect.

  The light flipped on with a snap. “Lenzi. Time for school.”

  I squinted and shaded my eyes from what seemed like a billion watts of light to find Mom in my doorway with her hand on the switch. “Are you okay? You look pale.” I fought the urge to check to see if the closet door was closed when she placed her palm on my forehead. “You’re all clammy.”

  “Yeah, I don’t feel so good.” It wasn’t a lie.

  “Maybe you’ll feel better after a shower. Come on.” She pulled the covers off. “Oh, Lenzi.” Her brow furrowed. “You were asleep when I got home. If I’d known you were still in your clothes, I’d have woken you up to change.”

  I slid to the edge of the bed. I had to get her out of the room before she figured out Alden was hiding out in my closet. “Yeah, I was really tired when I got in last night.” I followed Mom’s troubled look down to my rumpled clothes. There was a bloodstain on the blouse. “And I spilled ketchup on myself.”

  She took a step closer. “It doesn’t look like ketchup.”

  It didn’t. The blood had dried a dark maroon—almost brown. I couldn’t let her know I’d been hurt or she’d never leave. “It was shrimp sauce. Worcestershire in it, or something.”

  I grabbed my bathrobe and pushed by her. I didn’t realize how weak I was until I lost my balance in the hallway. Bracing myself against the wall, I waited for the floor to stay in one place. The faint click of my closet latch drove my heart into hyper-drive.

  Mom brushed my hair out of my face. “Lenzi, honey, you’re sick. Do you want me to take you to the doctor?”

  “No!” It came out much louder than I’d intended. “No. Thanks. I just need a shower and some sleep.”

  She took my face in her palms and looked in my eyes—searching for something like she did with Dad. My heart knotted in my chest. She knew.

  Her eyes brimmed with tears. “You can always talk to me. You know that, right?”

  I nodded, afraid to say anything.

  “I can’t be late to the office today. I’ll call the school on my way to work and tell them you’re sick. Call me if you need anything.”

  She held me for a long time. Her lilac scent and familiar arms made me feel like I did when I was little. Before Dad got so sick. Before the voices. When I was safe.

  I showered as quickly as I could, considering, and once I was sure Mom had left for work, I padded down the hallway to my room.

  The sun streaming through my open blinds lit the gold highlights in Alden’s hair. This was the first time I’d seen him in the light. His eyes were pale gray, almost silver. Beautiful and unearthly. He was the most attractive boy I’d ever met, and he looked way too comfortable lying on my bed.

  My heart did a flip-flop and I pulled my bathrobe tighter when he looked me up and down with those crazy silver eyes. I winced when the robe brushed the stitches. It had been a shock during my shower to discover five dark blue tidy knots on my upper abdomen just under my rib cage. I didn’t remember going to the hospital. I didn’t remember anything after I’d collapsed. I’d clearly overdone the Xanax.

  “How do you feel?” he asked, propping up on an elbow.

  I shifted my weight from foot to foot, feeling vulnerable in my robe. “I’m okay.”

  He sat up. “You don’t feel okay. You feel conflicted.”

  Conflicted summed it up pretty well. Being attacked by whatever that thing was in Kemah last night convinced me I wasn’t imagining things, and this boy on my bed had some answers. I took several steps into the room.

  “How do you know how I feel?”

  He lay back down and put his hands behind his head. “I told you in the cemetery that our souls are linked. I feel your emotions.” He rolled onto his side. “It’s how I found you last night. You were in danger. Your soul called.”

  I tightened my robe belt. “I thought you were just stalking me.”

  He smiled. “That too.”

  “How did you get in here?”

  He reached in his pocket, pulled out my house key, and set it on my nightstand. Obviously, he’d taken it from my purse when I was unconscious. Clever Ghost Boy. “I tucked you in before your mother came home and hung around to be sure you were okay.”

  I looked around and groaned. He’d been in my pigsty of a room all night.

  The noises in my head bounced to the foreground. I pressed my palms to my temples. “Stop. Stop it,” I whispered. The voices dimmed at once.

  Alden and I stared at each other in silence for a tense moment before he closed his eyes as if listening to something. My soul?

  I pulled the collar of the bathrobe closer. “It’s real, right? What’s happening to me—it’s not in my head. Dead people are really talking to me.”

  He moved to the edge of the bed. “Yes.”

  A lifetime of this would be intolerable. There had to be a way out. I crossed my arms. “I can’t do it. You need to make it stop.”

&nb
sp; “I can’t.” His voice was soft. Almost apologetic.

  Tears stung my eyes. “Why?”

  He stood, and for a moment I thought he was going to take me in his arms, but he put his hands in his pockets. “Lenzi, we’re just people. We’re different from most people, admittedly, but we don’t hold the cards. You can’t change what you are any more than any other creature on this planet.”

  It took everything in me not to cry. “I don’t want to do it. I’m scared.”

  He shuffled foot to foot as if he were uncomfortable. “I know. Knowledge alleviates fear. Maybe if you ask me questions, I can help you understand. What do you want to know?”

  I sat on the edge of the bed. “How do I make them go away?”

  He sat next to me. Close, but not touching. “You ask them to clarify their needs and then you help them find resolution. They aren’t trying to frighten you. They just want your attention.”

  “That thing last night wanted more than my attention.”

  “Yeah, that was unfortunate. And totally my fault. I shouldn’t have left you unprepared.” He ran his hands through his hair. “I’m sorry about that.”

  I swiveled to face him. “Okay, why does the temperature go nutty sometimes, like an arctic blast?”

  He smiled. “They have all kinds of gimmicks to catch your attention. That’s one of their favorites. Some of them can even give off smells. They can manipulate the physical environment, like knock things off shelves and lock doors and stuff like that.”

  I fiddled with the end of my robe belt. “Oh. So I’m not really in danger.”

  Alden paused for a moment before answering. “No. You really are in danger. Not from the run-of-the-mill Hindered, but from the Malevolent like last night. There aren’t many of them, but they’d love to have your body. They’d kick you out if they could.”

  I shuddered, recalling last night’s attack. “So that’s why I need you.”

  He stared into my eyes and paused before answering. “Yes.”

  “And we’ve been together for generations.”

  “Yes.”