by Erika Kelly
Contentment. Yeah, that’s what it felt like.
“You’ve only been gone one day, and she’s already talking about you, worrying that you left without saying goodbye. Wondering if you’re coming back.”
“I’m coming back.”
“Right. But you are going to leave. She got attached to you in a couple of days, imagine what will happen after a few weeks. And then what happens after the summer? Are you going to send her birthday cards every year, show up with presents once in a while, maybe spend a holiday or two with her? And then, as more time passes, will that eventually stop?”
“I don’t have answers to that.”
“I know. And that’s why I’m sitting here freaking out that we’re making a terrible mistake. That she’ll get attached to you, and then you’ll move on.”
He didn’t think that would happen. Couldn’t imagine it. But, at the same time, he couldn’t make promises. Not yet. “I can’t see that far ahead. I need more time. My life…I’m building a business. But…” He tipped his head back, staring up at the beamed ceiling. “I understand if you don’t want me to come back, but…Jesus, she’s my daughter. I can’t not see her.” I just found her.
“No, I know.” She went quiet for a moment. “This is really hard.”
“It is. For both of us. But I can’t go back. You understand that, right? I can’t pretend she’s not my child.”
“I know that.”
“What’s really worrying you?”
“That, for you, this is a lark. You’re getting to know her, and it’s interesting and it feels important, but then you’re going to go back to your life, and you’re going to forget about her.”
“That’s not going to happen.”
“I know, I know. I’m jumping ahead. I’m just so afraid she’s going to get hurt. It’s happened before. The guy I dated last year never even said goodbye. He got a job in Seattle, and he broke up with me. And that was fine, but he never said goodbye to Posie. One day, he was a big part of her life, and the next he was gone.”
“That guy’s an asshole. I’m not that guy.”
“I know. I’m sorry. I’m a little emotional right now.” She blew out a breath. “We got the results. You’re her father. I mean, we already knew that, but seeing it on a piece of paper…”
“Means I have custodial rights.”
“Yes. Exactly. Thank you for understanding how scary that is for me. It means you could give this piece of paper to a judge and take my daughter away from me for half the year. I mean, it’s good. I’m glad she has a dad. Especially a good man like you.”
She’s glad I’m Posie’s dad? Warmth spread through him, giving him a sense of something that felt a lot like pride. “Look, I’m not going to make promises about a future I can’t see. This is all brand new for me. But you’re a phenomenal Mom, and I’d never take her from you.”
“Thank you, and I appreciate you saying that. Look, this isn’t your fault. It’s the situation. And I shouldn’t be unloading all my anxiety on you. It isn’t fair.”
“I want you to. I want to know what you’re thinking, what you’re worried about. I need to know—the more we talk about it, the more we can help each other through this.”
“You’re right. I know you can’t see the future, and that’s what scares me. I won’t know what you want until you spend more time with her. And, so, until that happens, I’ll be wondering and worrying every single day.”
“I wish I could make this easier for you, and if you don’t want me staying in your backyard—if that’ll help—I’ll find somewhere else to stay. But I can tell you that I care about both of you. There’s only one thing I want right now, and that’s to spend more time with her.”
“No, you can stay. It’s not going to matter where you sleep at night. If you’re going to spend time with her, she’s going to get attached. You’re good with her.”
“I don’t know about that.”
“Trust me, you are. You don’t talk to her in that high-pitched voice people use for babies and dogs.”
Like Willow. He’d noticed that, too.
“She’s too smart for that. You’re also easy-going, and she’s pretty high strung, so it keeps her calmer.”
He really liked this woman. A lot. “I’m glad to hear you say that.”
“I just…can I just ask you to be very careful with her heart?”
“You can. And I will. I promise.”
“Okay, one more thing. Since you don’t know what kind of relationship you’ll want after you leave town, let’s not tell her you’re her father. I think it’s worse to have a dad who sends the occasional birthday and Christmas card than to not have one at all. You know?”
“I understand.” Believe me.
“Right now, only my family knows. So, let’s just leave it at that. I know you’re going to be working at the training center, but don’t tell the Bowies, okay?”
“I can trust them.”
“I’m sure you can, but they have girlfriends and friends and…it’s just a really small town. I’d appreciate if you’d keep it between us for now. For Posie’s sake.”
“Yeah, okay, sure.” In his lap, Ollie let out a crazy yawn that made his whole body shudder.
“What was that?”
“That’s my friend, Ollie.”
“Your friend sounds like he just jumped off the balcony into a pool after having way too much to drink.”
Beckett grinned. “He’s too cool for that. Ollie wasn’t in a frat.”
“You think he misses his owner?”
He stroked his fur. “He seems pretty damn comfortable right now.”
“I wonder how long he’s been waiting for you.”
“It’s got to be more than a couple weeks. He dropped a lot of weight.”
“That’s heartbreaking. You’re not just saying this so I’ll let you bring him home, are you?”
“No. But is it working?”
“Of course it is. I’m not a monster.”
“I’ll go over to her house tomorrow and find out what’s going on. But it’s likely—”
“I’m going to have piles of shit in my backyard.”
Beckett grinned. “All right. I’ll let you get some sleep. See you soon.” He disconnected, still staring at the phone, still feeling her all around him.
And all he wanted was to get back to Calamity.
In the pause between Cheap Trick’s “I’ll Be With You Tonight” and “Voices,” Coco heard the knock at the back door and nearly jumped out of her skin.
Her staff had all gone home, and no one delivered this late at night, so who could it be? Setting the spreader down, she hurried over and called, “Who is it?”
“Beckett.”
His deep voice, the lazy drawl of it, sent a thrill through her. He’s back?
Excitement making her jittery, she opened it to find him wearing worn jeans and a long sleeve T-shirt, looking unbelievably hot. The thin cotton clung to his bulging biceps and accentuated the breadth of his powerful shoulders. He looked so much like the man she’d fallen for in Vegas.
Only this time, she didn’t have a broken heart, and she wasn’t afraid of her future.
And, worse, she knew exactly what he was like in bed.
Sexy.
Passionate.
Hot.
She’d never felt that kind of intense intimacy with anyone else. At the time, she’d wondered if it had been the thrill of the moment—her first and only one-night stand. But that hadn’t been it at all. It was them. Their chemistry, their connection.
“I thought you weren’t leaving Colorado until tomorrow morning? Come in.” Flustered by her reaction to him, she headed over to the sink to wash her hands. Don’t you fall for him. “Hope you don’t mind, but I have to keep working.”
It’s complicated enough without developing feelings.
“Not at all.” She could hear his boots following her on the concrete floor. He stopped at the melanger, watching the churn of
creamy chocolate. “It’s so shiny. I hate to sound stupid, but…do you just melt bars and then mold them into different shapes?”
“No, that’s not how it works.” She hit the faucet with her elbow and then dried her hands on a clean towel. “It all starts with beans. I can give you a tour as soon as I finish this.”
“Cool.”
She returned to the table and poured the chocolate over the mold. Once she’d flooded each cavity, she reached for the scraper. “How was the drive?”
“Really nice. I saw a mountain goat and a herd of elk.”
She shot him a look, unable to hold back her grin, and waited for him to realize what he’d just said.
When he did, he chuckled, tipping his chin down and swiping that sexy mouth with a thumb. “Yeah, well, there it is. I see the world through Posie’s eyes now, okay? Been like that the whole weekend. I actually pulled over to record a field of prairie dogs popping their heads out of the ground, thinking she’d love it.”
“I do the same thing.” She smiled. “And she’ll love seeing it.” Half of her felt all warm and tingly that he cared so much about her little girl. The other half?
Was sparking like a live wire. This energy between them made her restless…
It made her crave more from him. Their naked bodies under the sheets, legs tangled, hands roaming, caressing, squeezing.
No one had ever touched her the way he had—like he couldn’t get enough.
And, God, she wanted that. She needed it.
Finished scraping the excess chocolate off the mold, she set it down and gave it a shake to get the bubbles out. “How’s Ollie?”
He winced. “He’s okay.”
“You look worried.”
“Mrs. Lionetti passed away two weeks ago. Her kids said they haven’t seen Ollie since.”
“He’s been wandering the woods all this time?”
He looked like the idea made him sick.
“Thank God you went home and found him. So, is he yours now? You said you needed to talk to her family.” Setting out another mold, she dropped a whole macadamia nut in each one.
“He’s mine.”
Lifting the melanger, she poured the chocolate, watching it glide, like a thick, shiny river. “I went ahead and made a vet appointment for tomorrow afternoon.”
“You did?”
“Yeah, is that okay?” She scraped the excess off. “You said you’d hit the road at six, so I made it for three. I thought you needed a day in Boulder? Don’t you have stuff to do?”
“I wanted to get back.” With a thoughtful expression, he tapped his knuckles on the marble countertop. Then, his gaze swung up to her. “That was nice of you…to set that up.” He seemed surprised…almost moved.
“Sure.” It made her wonder about his family, his girlfriend. Didn’t his people look out for him like that?
He swallowed. “Thank you.” Obviously uncomfortable, he looked around the room. “So, this is where the magic happens, huh?”
“It is.” She continued clearing away every drop of the excess chocolate. “This is my last one.”
“You don’t usually work this late, do you?”
“No, definitely not. I’ve got a great team, and I do my admin work at home in the evenings. But the chocolate festival’s in a few weeks, and with Laurent and everyone coming, I really want to create something amazing.”
“He’s the one who gave you your start?”
“Yes. He’s also one of the most revered chocolatiers in the world. So, the pressure’s on to do something that’ll impress him.”
“He’s tried your chocolates before, though, right?”
“Of course. I sent him my very first box. You know the sweetest thing ever? I went to visit him in Paris, and I found the box in his office.”
“That’s nice. Sounds like you’ve already made an impression.”
“He was very kind to me. I was lost and hurt—”
“He didn’t help you because you were lost and hurt.”
He got her attention with that comment. She set the scraper down.
“He helped you because you were curious and determined. And because he saw that, in spite of the sadness and hurt, you were still fierce and determined. That’s what I saw, that night in Vegas. Like I told you before, that’s what drew me to you.” He moved closer. “Up until now I’ve had a girlfriend so I couldn’t say this, but I find that sexy as fuck.”
She wanted to change the subject as much as she wanted to hear more. She liked the fire in his eyes, the heat in his tone.
Oh, yes, she did.
“I’m making you uncomfortable. I’ll stop.”
“Are you kidding? I’m a single mother. I want to hear you say things like that all day long. If I’m uncomfortable, it’s because it feels dangerous to hear you say that, and it’s been a very long time since I’ve done anything dangerous. And, by that, I mean Las Vegas six years ago.”
His eyes flared.
He’d looked at her like this once before, and she knew where it led. Knew what his hands felt like when they’d finally given in to an attraction that had burned out of control.
She’d relived it a thousand times over the years. That first grip of his big hand on her ass, the way he’d hauled her up hard against him. The way he’d cupped her breast and squeezed so lustily.
God, that had been hot.
“But it’s different this time. The stakes are a thousand times higher. You’re Posie’s dad, and you’re trying to figure out how to fit into her world. We can’t do anything to take the focus off that.”
She could actually see him shut off the part of himself that burned.
“How about that tour?” She set the trays in the cooling cabinet.
He nodded, taking a step back. She gathered her tools and set them in a bowl of soapy water in the sink.
“So, this festival…is it an annual thing?” he asked.
“I’d like it to be.” She was glad for the change in conversation, but her body hadn’t cooled down, and she didn’t want to go back to friendly, distant chatter.
She needed his touch like she needed her next breath.
She needed to sink into all those delicious sensations only he awakened.
That night in Vegas, she’d been wild, uninhibited, and it had been outrageous.
A memory flashed in her mind. Riding him, back arched, as she’d gripped his hard thighs, his big hands palming her breasts. A tremor ran through her body.
Oh, God.
“You’ve come up with some good ideas. I saw on your website that you’ve supplied chocolates for Oscar swag bags the last two years. That’s pretty impressive.”
“It’s very cool, but it hasn’t turned me into an overnight success.”
“How does the festival work?”
“It’s a ticketed three-day event with chocolatiers from around the world. Each one will have a booth in the ballroom of the resort. We’ll have demonstrations and contests…it’ll be fun.”
“Good response?”
“Better than I could have imagined. We’ve hit capacity for booths, and the ticket sales are fantastic.”
“I don’t have much of a sweet tooth, but I’d definitely go to a chocolate festival.”
“Oh, for sure. But it’s pretty expensive to get in the door, so that’s why I’m so pleased with the sales.” She rinsed her hands and dried them on a dish towel. “Okay, let’s do this. She pointed to a floor-to-ceiling shelf stuffed with jute bags. “It all starts with the beans. It took me a long time to create my signature flavor. I had to experiment with cacao beans from around the world to find the blend I think makes Coco’s Chocolates stand out.”
“I don’t know where I got the idea that a chocolate maker just bought stacks of chocolate bars and melted them.”
“That’s exactly what launched this whole, crazy trip I’ve been on. I assumed everyone bought the same high-quality chocolate from a vendor and then made it their own with liquor and nuts or whatever they ad
ded. But, nope, it’s all about the bean blends, the roasting…” She led him to counter. “Which is done right here in these coffee bean roasting ovens. As you learned the other day, I can smell when they’re ready, but for the less experienced nose, we set the timer for fifteen minutes. And then we listen for them to start cracking.”
“This is way less Willy Wonka then I was expecting.”
“Right? It’s science. It’s all about weights and calculations.” She pointed across the room to a chart. “I base each type of chocolate I make on percentages. That’s what gives each piece its distinctive flavor. Fortunately, I’m good at math. Anyhow…” She patted a machine made of aluminum and food-grade PVC that sat on a counter by the wall. “After they’re roasted, we separate the husk from the nib with these winnowers.” She moved over to a stainless-steel barrel fitted with two granite roller stones. “This baby’s the melanger. This is where we get some of that chocolate factory action. It refines the nibs down to about twenty microns.” She smiled at him. “Those pesky numbers. Basically, after about twenty-four hours, we have that glassy, creamy chocolate river effect.”
“This is pretty fucking cool.”
“I think so. So, once the chocolate’s shiny and smooth, it has to be tempered. And then…” She gestured to the shelves filled with molds. “The fun begins. I get to experiment with all kinds of different flavors and shapes. Do you want to try some?”
His gaze went hot, and his tongue licked his bottom lip. Desire crested across his cheeks in pink arches. “You’re beautiful.”
Oh, God. Carnal hunger streaked through her hot and fast. She hadn’t heard anything like that in so long. She hadn’t felt like a woman in so long. “Thanks.” Her voice came out breathy and thin.
His gaze drifted to her mouth. “I don’t just mean your looks. Well, I do, but it’s so much more. There’s just something about you…that appeals to me.”
“Appeals to you?” She said it with a laugh, mostly to break the tension.
Pink flamed to red, and he glanced down.
She wanted to kick her own ass for embarrassing him.