Lessons of the Heart

by Jodie Larson

  I place my head on my arms still folded over the seat. I don’t even want to think about what they could or could not be resting on at this moment. I’m just thankful that Lyle is here helping me.

  “Yeah, happy birthday to me.”

  I can hear Chase behind me and I turn my head. “Britt, I’m sorry about the drinks. Think you can forgive me?”

  He hands me the water that someone had brought and I sit back, eagerly taking it from him.

  “Yeah, I forgive you for the drinks,” I say, eyeballing him because I’m not sure I forgive his wandering fingers yet.

  “Move! Get out of the way! Watch it!” Penny yells from outside the bathroom. She shoves Chase to the side and crouches down next to Lyle. “Hey, girl, you doing okay?”

  I lean against the wall and take another sip of water. “Yeah, I’m okay now.”

  She flushes the toilet, letting the evidence wash down the drain.

  “You ready to rally?” Lyle says.

  I try to laugh, but it makes my stomach hurt. “I don’t think so. Water sounds good right now.” I look to Penny. “What time is it?”

  She checks her watch with a grimace. “12:40. Liam is going to be here any minute, and he’s going to shoot me if he catches you like this.”

  Penny and Lyle help me up and I only sway for a moment on my feet. Chase is gone, hopefully somewhere feeling sorry for what he did. It’ll take me a few days to forgive him, but I know I will. He’s Chase after all. He may be hopelessly in love with me, but I’ve known him since we were kids.

  “You weren’t overly attached to this scarf were you, honey?” Penny asks as she takes it off my neck.

  “Kind of, why?”

  She holds it at arm’s length and throws it in the garbage. “Because you puked all over it, and it’s smelly and red now.”

  “Shit,” I mutter while holding onto her arm. Lyle steadies me on the other side, and they help me back to the couch where my stuff is.

  Liam appears at my side with his hands on his hips, and I can’t tell if he’s amused or disappointed.

  “So, enjoy your birthday?” he asks.

  “Shut up and get me home, please.”

  He laughs this time, saying hi and bye to everyone as he and Penny help me out of the house and into his Mustang.

  “You puke on my seats, and I’m going to kill you.”

  “Drive slow, and you won’t have that problem, assmunch.”

  Penny sits in the back behind Liam and holds a conversation with him while I rest my head against the cold glass. Man, that feels good.

  Before I know it, Liam parks his car in the driveway and helps me out. My stomach has settled, and I feel more stable on my feet.

  “You good?” he asks, letting go of my arm.

  “Yeah I’m good.” I turn to Penny and hug her. “Happy birthday, bitch.”

  She laughs and hugs me back. “Happy birthday back. Now go inside and shower. You smell like vomit.”

  She climbs into her car, pulling away and heading toward her house. Liam holds the door open and stays behind me while I make it up the stairs toward our rooms.

  “Need help?” he asks.

  “Not in the shower, perv,” I reply.

  “I’ll stay out in the hall in case you need me. If you feel dizzy or weak again, just sit down then knock on the glass. I’ll come in and get you.”

  I pause before shutting the door and lean against the wall for balance. “Thanks, Liam.”

  He smiles back and shrugs. “I’m your big brother. It’s what I do.”

  I close the door and start the water, grateful that I know I can always count on Liam to be there to help me out in any given situation.

  I KNOCK SOFTLY ON LIAM’S door, hoping he’s awake. There’s no noise on the other side and I hesitate before verifying that’s he’s not in there.

  “Liam?” I ask through the door.

  There’s a rustling now and the door opens with Liam standing before me in his sweatpants and ratty old football t-shirt, scratching his bed head.

  “Why are you up? It’s like eight o’clock in the morning. Shouldn’t you be sleeping off the mother of all hangovers right now?”

  I shrug and smile. “Guess I wasn’t as drunk as I thought I was.”

  He walks back to his bed and lies on his back. “Or you got it all out of your system when you puked last night.”

  I follow him into his room and grab his desk chair, straddling it to face him. “Either way, no head pain, no upset stomach. Just perfectly normal today. And since it’s today and I have things to do, I need a ride to go get my car.”

  He twists his head to the side and scrunches up his face. “Seriously? Can’t Penny come get you?”

  “You just want Penny to come get me so you can molest her in your mind when you see her.”

  He smirks. “Don’t need her here to do that, Britt.”

  My head falls back with a loud groan. “You are so impossible, you know that? She’s my best friend. Why do you have to obsess about her? Isn’t there someone else out there for you to torture and annoy?”

  He sits up and shrugs. “Penny will always be my ultimate, the one I compare every single girl with because honestly no one else even comes close. She’s the perfect amount of sass and independence all rolled into this beautiful and smart package.”

  Whoa, that’s the first time I’ve ever heard him talking about her like that. If that’s how he really feels, why don’t they try to get together?

  “So if that’s the reason, what’s stopping you?”

  Liam stands from the bed and walks over to his closet, pulling a hoodie from a hanger. “Because she’s your best friend and I know you wouldn’t forgive me if something ever happened between us. That’s why I’m just waiting, biding my time until we’re both ready. I’m going to marry that girl one day.”

  The thought of Liam and Penny being together twists through my mind and stomach, wondering if I could handle something like that. But the possibility of them getting married excites me because then she’d be my sister and we’d always be together.

  “Just promise me you won’t go crazy while she figures out that you’re the one and only for her as well.”

  He shoves his hands in the front pocket and sighs. “I’m trying. It’s hard, but I know the end reward will be worth it.”

  I give him a hug, knowing that it’s torture for him to watch her go through different guys who treat her like crap. But he’s right. She’s not ready to make that sort of commitment yet.

  “Okay, you’re what, almost twenty years old and you’re thinking of settling down? Really?”

  He laughs and pushes me out the door. “No, I’m not thinking of settling down. And I’m not twenty yet.”

  “Close enough. You will be in eight months.”

  “Either way. I know how I feel about her and I know what I want. And she’s it. But I promised myself that I wouldn’t try until she was older, at least a couple years into college.”

  “Aw, I’m so proud. Look at you, being all noble and responsible. It almost makes me not want to cut your nuts off for thinking about defiling my best friend with your boy parts.”

  He laughs as we enter the kitchen. Mom and Dad are in their usual spots, drinking coffee and reading the paper.

  “Good morning, kids,” my mom chirps.

  “Morning, Mom,” we say in unison.

  “How did last night go?” my dad asks, folding up his paper to give us his full attention.

  I chew on my bottom lip and dive into the refrigerator to hide. Liam, of course, has nothing to be ashamed of.

  “I ended up picking them up from Travis’s, so Britta and I were just leaving to get her car.”

  My dad looks at me with a raised eyebrow. “Good night then?”

  I shrug my shoulders and give a weak smile. “It was fun.”

  “A little too fun?” my mom questions with a smile on her face.

  That makes me relax and laugh a little. “Yeah, a lit
tle too much fun.”

  My dad takes a sip of his coffee. “We were young once and know what goes on at these parties. However, I’m very proud of you for being responsible and not driving. So you two hurry up and get her car. Then you can go about your day.”

  Wow, that went smoother than I thought it would. I was expecting to get the third degree or something along those lines. Maybe Liam really did pave the way for me.

  “Thanks, Dad.”

  I walk over and hug both my parents.

  “I’m going to head out after I get the car so I won’t be back right away,” I say, grabbing my jacket and purse.

  “Sounds good, honey. You have your phone in case we need to get a hold of you?” my mom asks.

  I nod. “Yep, it’s in my purse.”

  “Okay then. Have fun today.”

  “I will.” I turn to Liam, who’s shoving a piece of peanut butter toast into his mouth. “Ready?”

  He brushes the crumbs off his hands and nods. “Yep. Let’s go.”

  After I get my car and Liam leaves, I decide that a dose of caffeine is needed to fully wake me up. I’m still not functioning on all cylinders.

  I stop at Perk Me Up, the local coffee house in town and order my usual skinny caramel latte. Once the barista, with a few too many piercings, gives me my drink, I walk to my usual couch and pull out my book. This rare moment of peace is something that I want to enjoy before Penny starts bombarding me with requests to go out and do something.

  A half hour passes before I know it and I place the book down in my lap to stretch my arms above my head. I look around at the patrons who’ve entered and notice it’s the usual crowd. Well, except for the guy sitting at the table in front of me, who is hunched over reading something. He takes a sip of his coffee and flinches slightly when it spills on his pants, muttering something I can’t hear as he tries to wipe it off. I smile, knowing how that feels because I do it way too often. Grabbing a stack of napkins, I lean forward and tap him lightly on the shoulder.

  “Here you go. In case you need some more.”

  He turns around and I’m greeted by a smiling familiar face.

  “Hey you.” He takes the stack of napkins from me. “Thanks.”

  James brushes away what he can of the coffee and turns sideways in his chair to face me.

  “No problem,” I say, feeling a slight blush creep into my cheeks.

  “Apparently I’m having issues drinking my coffee this morning. Hole in my lip or something like that.” He points to another stain on his knee, still wet but starting to fade slightly.

  I laugh and shake my head. “I guess so. That whole drinking thing always sneaks up on you, being tricky and all.”

  His smile brightens, making his green eyes dance with delight. He has that ‘just rolled out of bed’ look going for him, with his disheveled hair and thrown-together clothes.

  “Yeah, you’d think I would have learned by now.” He nervously fidgets with his cup. “So what brings you here this morning?”

  I hold up my coffee and smirk. “What else? Plus I like to come here to read and sneak in some me time.”

  “Looks like we have the same plan.” He picks up his book and shows it to me.

  “Oscar Wilde, huh? You like the classics?”

  He nods. “I enjoy all kinds of books, but the classics are my favorite. When I need to recharge, I pull one out and get lost within the pages.”

  “I know the feeling. I read to escape as well. Some days it all just gets to be a bit much, especially on school days. But for those few hours when I’m reading, everything doesn’t seem quite as bad.”

  “I completely understand that. School makes everything harder.” He pauses, propping his ankle on his knee. “How early do you usually get there?”

  “Around seven or so. I like to be extra early to get my stuff prepped for the day.”

  “Same here. I’m a planner, that’s for sure. My compulsive need to have everything organized and in its place won’t let me be anything but that.”

  “Me too. Wow, I can’t believe I’ve finally met someone else who has a crazy OCD complex like me. Yesterday when I ran into you and all the papers scattered everywhere? I thought my brain was going to explode. I had just organized them after entering them into the grade book and now I have to do it again on Monday.”

  I can tell that James understands by his knowing smile. “So how long have you lived here in Somerset?” he asks, moving his chair closer.

  “My whole life. I just can’t seem to get away. It’s home, you know. What about you? What brings you here?”

  Just then his cell phone rings as he opens his mouth to answer my question. James holds up a finger, pulling the phone out of his pocket and checks the caller ID. He cringes slightly and turns back to me.

  “Sorry, I have to take this,” he says. He stands and walks out the front door to take the call.

  I watch him through the window, admiring his stature and overall appearance. He’s good looking. No, scratch that. Great looking. Like no one else I’ve ever seen before. He’s got a model quality to him with a face that is pure symmetry, appealing to my inner perfectionist. But there’s something else about him that causes me to smile like an idiot.

  He catches me looking and waves with a smile. Then he mocks his call with hand gestures, letting me know that the person on the other line is extremely chatty. I laugh and pull my legs underneath me, getting more comfortable.

  I wonder what classes we’ll have together. He looks to be about my age so he must be a senior as well. But I’m awful at determining a guy’s age. In my opinion, if they’re under twenty-five, they all look like they’re eighteen.

  James’s face changes slightly, his smile slipping as his head drops. I chew on my lip and remind myself that I should stop staring at him. But I can’t help it. My eyes seem to have a mind of their own, drawing me to him in everything that he does. Every lip twitch, every blink of his eye, every foot shuffle has my body humming. It’s an odd feeling for me, one that confuses me slightly.

  James walks back inside, his demeanor a little less enthusiastic than before he took the call. His eyes reach mine and there’s a hint of regret in them.

  “That was my folks. I need to get going.” He gathers his stuff from the table.

  A shot of disappointment runs through me that he’s leaving, just when we were starting to get to know each other.

  “Oh, okay,” I say while trying to mask the sadness in my voice.

  He must notice it because his face softens as his eyes smile at me.

  “It was nice running into you again, Britta. We’ll see each other on Monday, right?”

  I nod. “Definitely.”

  He pulls his jacket on and the smile he gives sends warmth through my veins. “Good. See you then.”

  And just like that he walks out the door to the truck that’s parked across the street. I sit and watch again, feeling slightly creeper-ish but unable to get him off my mind. In just those few minutes of us talking, I could feel something growing between us. A friendship or kindred spirit of sorts I guess. We have a few things in common, which is a bit surprising. Normally, I don’t find guys who enjoy the same things as I do.

  I down the rest of my coffee and shove all my stuff into my purse. I dial Penny’s number when I get in my car, hoping she’s awake by now.

  “What’s up?” she says in greeting.

  “Not much. I’m out and about right now. Want to go shopping? I need to replace that scarf from last night and I have the urge to buy a new book.”

  “Nerd.” I can almost see her rolling her eyes in my head. “Yeah, I’m game for shopping. Give me twenty minutes and I’ll meet you at the mall.”

  “Okay, lazy bones. See you in a few.”

  I start driving toward the mall with James still on my mind. A bud of hope blossoms in my chest at the thought of seeing him on Monday. He’s definitely something to look forward to.

  I’M DROWNING IN A SEA of papers from Mrs
. Davis, in addition to the papers I have to reorganize from Friday after my run-in with James. Even after my attempts at distraction over the weekend, he was still in my brain. There’s just something about him that I can’t put my finger on. Whatever it is I need to figure it out and soon.

  As luck would have it, I haven’t seen him in any of my classes or passed him in the halls. At this point I don’t know if I’ll even see him today. But I’m still hoping.

  The bell rings for the end of the fifth period and I head to my locker to grab my stuff for Mr. Ward’s class. Well, at least it used to be Mr. Ward’s class. I’ll find out today who the new teacher is.

  Penny comes barreling down the hallway, nearly knocking me over when she grabs my shoulders.

  “Holy shit dude!”

  I laugh and shake my head. “What? Why do you look like you just ran a marathon?”

  She regains her composure, smoothing her hair down from the frazzled mess it once was. “The new teacher they got to replace Mr. Ward? He’s hot. Majorly hot. Like ghost pepper, the surface of the sun, you’ll-go-blind-from-touching-it-too-much hot.”

  “You’re a nut, you know that? He’s a teacher. You make it sound like Chris Hemsworth is here instead.” I pause. “And did you seriously just say go blind from touching it too much?”

  Penny drags me by the arm to class. “Yes, because he’s that hot.”

  “You know, between you and my brother I don’t know who is more inappropriate and lewd.”

  “Just one more thing we both have in common.” She walks to her chair over by Travis, who greets her with open arms and a showy kiss.

  I roll my eyes and take my seat, flipping through my notebook to find the next clean page. My pencils are sharpened, my pen is handy, textbook open to the lesson written on the board in rather neat masculine handwriting. After Penny’s reaction to the new teacher, I’m kind of interested to see him myself. I wonder if it’s true, if he really is the good looking, super hot guy that she depicts.

  Chase pulls on my sleeve. He looks sheepish and still carries around regret from Friday night.

  “You mad at me?” He chews on his thumbnail, apparently worried about what I’m going to say.