by Amanda Heath
All too soon I pull back not wanting to get all hot and bothered in my car yet again. There is absolutely no room in my car for making out. Besides I want us to really get to know each other before we get too carried away. I can tell she isn’t ready for it either by the innocent way she kisses and touches me. There is nothing wrong with it though, it’s actually a turn on that I’m the only guy she has ever gotten this close to.
“You better get inside before I take to advantage of you.” I say with a touch of disappointment in my voice,
She blinks and then there is a twinkle in her eyes. “I think at this point I would let you take advantage of me.”
I groan. “Don’t say things like that. I’m having enough trouble controlling myself as it is.” This girl is going to kill me.
She leans over the console to look deep into my face. “It’s ok to lose control sometimes Declan. It’s not fun to live life that way.” I know she is right.
I look away before speaking again. “I don’t really know how to be any other way.” I’ve started twiddling my thumbs. A sure sign I’m uncomfortable.
“Hmm I will be happy to help with that, if you will let me.” She says as she reaches over to stroke my cheek. It’s an unknown gesture. I have also never been comfortable with affection. I’m pretty sure I have daddy issues.
I laugh at this. I look back up at her and place my hand on her cheek smoothing my thumb across her soft skin. “Baby I’ll let you do anything if it means I get to spend time with you.”
She smiles coyly at me before responding. “That’s really cheesy.”
I take my hand from her face and move it down to her side. Before she has time to guess what I am doing I start to tickle her. She ends up against the door scream laughing her head off. I find myself laughing with her before I let her go. “You should get out of her before I decided to play tickle monster again.”
She is still trying to catch her breath so she just nods. After sitting up and given me an innocent kiss she is out the door. I sit in the parking lot until she is safely inside.
****
My truck is going to be in the shop for weeks. Poor Betty. Don’t get me wrong I love my range rover but I’m a truck kind of guy. I guess my truck makes me feel more manly or whatever, but I’m not over compensating for something if you catch my drift.
The more time goes on I’m feel like a total dumbass for being with Claire for so long. I can still remember the first time I saw Claire. It was the beginning of seventh grade. I thought she was the hottest girl I had ever seen. It wasn’t long before she had me wrapped around her finger. Back then I would have done anything she asked me. God I was an idiot. I mean what kind of girl isn’t a virgin at the age of thirteen? No a very good kind.
It was good for a while but then she started to get really possessive. She would flip out and act like a totally crazy bitch if another girl talked to me and before long girls in our school didn’t even look at me. I guess if we had broken up then I wouldn’t have had much choice of other girls to date.
She is also the reason I became friends with Jaden. After finding out all my buddies had sex with her I wasn’t too keen on being friends with them anymore. He wasn’t like them. He actually wanted to talk about other things then girls. I guess what I’m getting at is he has depth. Something I needed at the time. Still do in fact.
While I’m on that train of thought she’s also the reason I met Teagan. It was amazing that left hook she threw. She’s so tiny you wouldn’t think that she could get enough momentum. Plus Claire got what has been coming to her. Karma is a bitch.
Marcus bursts into my room startlingly me out of my thoughts. He’s got his football tucked under his arm. “Want to throw the ball around?”
I sigh and tell him “Yeah lets go.”
“Sweet.” He states running out of my doorway.
He likes to throw the ball when he needs to talk. I guess he needs something to do with his hands. Marcus isn’t very serious most of the time. He usually likes to joke around and be a smart ass. He doesn’t get taken seriously because of it. Little does anybody else know that this kid has a whole lot going on in his head. In a way his jokester ways are just a mask he puts on. I wish he would drop it and be himself. I like the real him and I wish he would see that other people would to.
I got lost in my thoughts again as I make my way down to the front yard. That’s how I find myself with a football to the face. That’s going to leave a mark I think as I rub my right eye. “Shit Declan I’m so sorry I thought you were paying attention! Damn bro you need to get out of your head sometimes. The real world is nice too.” He says.
I pick up the ball where it landed. No use throwing it around now I got to get ice on my eye. “Thanks Marcus! I needed a black eye while I’m out tonight.” I tell him sarcastically.
“I’m sorry dude but hell you haven’t ever been this out of it. What’s going on in that head?” He questions as he follows me into the house.
I make my way into the kitchen to fill up a bag of ice as I reply “Lots of things lately. I have a lot going on now and I can’t seem to focus on much without wandering off into la la land. I have you to worry about. This secret running around behind Jaden’s back with Teagan. Claire being a psycho bitch.” I whence as I place the bag over my eye. That stings!
“Why are you worried about me? I get all that other stuff but I don’t have any drama going on.” He scratches his head like he doesn’t know exactly what I’m talking about.
“You think you’re hiding behind all your jokes and sarcasm but you aren’t fooling me. I have known you your whole life. I know it’s tough for you since mom and dad aren’t around but I am here. I know have all that other shit going on but I will always have time for you. No matter what else I have going on. You’re the only family I have and you will always be important to me.” I finish as I sit down at the kitchen table.
He joins me and I know the tears are coming. I haven’t seen him cry since we were kids but I feel them and it breaks my heart. “I feel like I’m not good enough or something. I see other parents at school all the time supporting their kids and I can’t figure out why we don’t matter to ours. They just left us here to rot. Why aren’t we good enough for them? Why did mom just leave us like that? What did we ever do to deserve this shit? Why did they have kids if they weren’t going to take care of them?” He sobs into his hands.
I drop my ice on the table and kneel down in front of him, carefully taking his hands away from his face. “You are good enough Marcus. They are the ones who aren’t good enough. We don’t matter to them because they are selfish and cruel. They only care about themselves and that’s okay because we have each other and we always will. Don’t you ever forget that. You are good enough for me and that’s all that matters.” I say as I hug him to me. Silent tears running down my face, “I don’t ever want you to get this worked up again. You’re going to wait too long and blow. I don’t care what I’m doing or where I am in life you will always have me. I would do anything for you Marcus. Anything.”
Chapter 11
Teagan
Grace is pacing around our dorm room like a caged animal. I have no idea why she is so nervous. It’s not like she hasn’t ever been on a date before. I would call it a double date but seeing as Jaden can’t know that I’m seeing Declan then it’s just their date and us playing wingmen. “Grace you are wearing a whole in the rug. What’s your deal?”
“Okay this stays between me and you. I haven’t ever been on a date with someone I really liked before. I’m so nervous. Your brother is like the nicest guy I have ever met and I don’t want to screw it up.” She states while chewing on a cherry red finger nail.
“Stop that chick or you are going to ruin your manicure.” I tease from my place lying on my bed. “Besides you have nothing to worry about. Jaden has to really like you to because I have never even heard of him going on a date. I mean I know he likes women and everything but it’s almost like he doesn’t want t
o get hurt.”
“Oh that has to do with Claire and Declan. He doesn’t want to end up like him. Claire is a crazy bitch; I don’t blame him I would be scared to date because of her myself.”
“What do you mean?”
“Claire slept with every guy available while she was with Declan. Treated him like shit too. I hear it was a pretty messed up relationship and Jaden said that it scared him off of dating.”
“Well shit that’s no reason to get scared of dating. She’s one in a million. Well maybe I know girls can be pretty crazy but shit not every girl will go crave whore all over her ex’s truck to make a point.”
“Yeah that is pretty crazy. He said he saw how torn up Declan was and he even feels guilty for not helping Declan out with it. But according to Jaden, Declan is a pretty closed mouth kind of guy, he doesn’t open up all that much.”
“I don’t blame him really. I mean look at his relationship with Claire plus his screwed up parents. I would be a brick wall myself.” I pause wondering if I should share this next tidbit with her. Oh what the hell. “He told me that I make him feel out of control. Which doesn’t seem all that bad to me but I think he is one of those that doesn’t like to be that way.”
“Totally I bet he even likes to dominate in the bedroom if you know what I mean.”
I burst out laughing before answering. “I don’t think so. It’s kind of fuzzy from the night at the party but I don’t think he tried to tie me up or spank me. And when we got all hot in bothered in the truck last week, he let me control what we were doing.”
“That’s hot. When the guy lets you take over and do whatever you want.” She fans her face like she is actually hot. “I can’t stand it when they do everything and expect you to lay there with your legs open and crap. Totally lame.”
“Oh my god TMI! I get you’re not a Virgin Mary or whatever but I’m all innocent and stuff and your making my ears bleed!”
“Whatever you might be a virgin but you aren’t virginal in any way. You have this little sway when you walk and I have seen quite a few boys drooling after you. “
“Whatever Grace, they were just looking at me so you wouldn’t think they were looking at you.” I smirk as she grins from ear to ear.
“Yeah you keep telling yourself that sweetie!”
Just then my cell phone went off announcing that the guys were here. “You ready to go?”
“Yeah as ready as I’ll ever be. Few I’m more nervous than a virgin on her wedding night!”
“Geez is losing your virginity that bad?”
She looks like she is going to bust out laughing. “No it isn’t that bad. It hurts and stings for a while but after the first time your good to go!” She throws her head back and laughs. “Sex only gets better with time honey; you’ll figure that out if you hang out with Declan to much longer. He got it on with one of the girls on the team couple weeks ago. Said he kept her up all night long. That’s the kind of man you want.” She winks at me as she heads down the stairs.
Great just what I need, more naughty thoughts about Declan. I guess she doesn’t realize that I have those already. Just because I’m a virgin doesn’t mean I don’t know how it works.
As I make my way out of the lobby I catch the site of Jaden giving Grace a single red rose. She was beaming from head to toe. It makes me think of my single rose up in my room that Declan gave me on our date last week. Hmm I wonder if that’s where Jaden got the idea. I meet Declan’s eyes and he winks. Yup that is where he got the idea. I mouth good one to him before hugging my brother hello.
I pause when I notice his black eye. “Who hit you?”
“My little brother threw a football when I wasn’t looking.”
I stop myself from touching him. “Does it hurt?”
“I don’t even notice it anymore, now that you’re here.” He smirks before we are interrupted by Jaden.
Before I know it we are loaded up into Declan’s range rover on our way to the local bowling alley. I haven’t bowled in years. I used to play on a team when I was little. I’m pretty freaking good if I don’t say so myself.
Jaden decided to ride up front with Declan while Grace and I got thrown in the back. I kept sneaking peaks at Declan through the review mirror. Every time I looked he was looking back which made me bite my lip so I wouldn’t grin from ear to ear. I almost get lost in his chocolate eyes but Grace nudges me out of them.
“Quit eye making out with him before Jaden sees.” She whispers for my ears only.
I nod and make a point not to look into the mirror anymore.
Declan
God she looks so beautiful. She wore her hair down and it’s almost wild with all the raven curls. Her emerald eyes are lined in black and they pop with the low cut black shirt she is wearing. I can’t help thinking how great her ass looks in her jeans or the way her black knee high boots hug her legs.
The four of us are sitting at one of the ten lanes in the bowling alley. I’m not much of a bowler but I would do anything to spend time with Teagan. We ordered a large pepperoni pizza when we entered and we proceeded to stuff our faces. Grace and Jaden are chatting quietly with their heads bent together. I’m glad because Jaden deserves some fun after all the hard work he does on the team.
I sneak my hand to Teagan’s thigh where she is sitting next to me. She jerks slightly and her face flushes but our company doesn’t notice because they are too engrossed in each other. It’s my turn to jerk when her hand falls over mine drawing circles with her short nails. I shiver which is totally girly I know but I have a thing for nails.
“Well I see the party got started without me. Way to wait bro.” says a tall blonde dude. I guess he is good looking with his messy hair style and piercing pale blue eyes. He’s wearing some band tee I have never heard of and there’s paint on his jeans. His face seems familiar and that’s when I realize its Caden, the other twin.
I quickly remove my hand from Teagan’s leg hoping he didn’t see anything. “Hey it’s nice to meet you finally, I’m Declan Sage.” I say holding out my hand.
He eyes me up and down and smirks. He takes my hand as he replies “Nice to finally meet the man love of my brothers.”
Jaden looks pissed and throws a comeback. “Oh did you finally find your sissy paint brushes and finish your rainbow painting?”
A dark look passes over Caden’s face but Teagan cuts him off before he even starts to say anything. “What the hell Jaden I paint too you know. Plus his paintings aren’t even girly they are incredible and you just wish that you could pull off amazing feats like that.”
“Thanks Teag but I don’t really care what he thinks. He only cares about football and wouldn’t know good art if you hit him over the head with it.”
“What’s with you two?” Teagan questions pointedly looking at Caden.
“Nothing Teag. You know what I’m going to head out I’ve got other stuff I would rather be doing.” He says to all of us but he is looking straight at Grace. What’s that about?
“Yeah why don’t you go do that? I shouldn’t have invited you to begin with.” Jaden sneers.
Caden gives him a glare that would freeze hell and turns to leave. Yeah I have no idea what that was about. Every time Jaden talks about his twin he’s got nothing but love for him.
“Jaden why the hell are you being so mean to him? What the fuck is your problem?” Teagan practically screams at him.
“He’s a total dick head. Let him leave I don’t want him here anymore. He can stay the hell away from me for a while too if he knows what’s good for him.” He looks away from the table and stares over the lanes.
“Umm if y’all excuse me I need to go to the lady’s room. Teagan can you come with me?” Grace throws in after Jaden’s angry comment.
“Sure.” Teagan agrees and taps my thigh to let her pass.
After they are gone I start questioning Jaden. “Umm yeah what was that really about?”
“He has a thing for Grace. Apparently they met in the cafete
ria and she left an impression. She doesn’t feel the same way and chose to come out with me tonight. Caden didn’t like that. I told him I knew her first.” He states as he pops his straw in and out of his coke.
“Well that’s no reason for you to fight with him. He’s not making a move on her or anything. Haven’t y’all ever liked the same person before?”
“No not really. We like completely different types. He’s into easy and hot. I’m into more than a one night stand and I don’t care what they look like on the outside as long as their insides are good.”
“Well Grace is hot but I don’t think she is easy. He’ll get over it I’m sure. Just give him time, he’ll find someone else in no time.”
“Yeah I know your right but hell I haven’t really shown interest in anybody and he thinks I’m wrong because I won’t back off. I’m going to start kicking his ass like I did in grade school.”
“I don’t think you need to go that far dude. She’s hot and if you’re going to really date her you’re going to have to get used to other guys flirting and hitting on her. At least she’s not a total slut like Claire, so you don’t have to worry about all your friends banging her.”
“Yeah but I don’t have to like it. I guess if I go around punching every guy that looks at her I wouldn’t ever see her since I’d be sitting in jail.” He laughs as Grace joins us back at the table.
“Umm Declan do you think that you could leave Jaden and I alone for a little bit? Go play air hockey or something?” she asks scooting into the booth.
“Sure…” I trail off. Getting up I wonder if she is going to bitch out Jaden for his behavior earlier with Caden. I hope not. Jaden doesn’t need that crap; it’s not his fault Caden wants her.
As I’m passing the bathrooms I feel a hand grab my arm and pull me into the dark room.
Chapter 12
Teagan