Gabriel's Heart [The Men of Treasure Cove 5] (Siren Publishing Ménage Everlasting)

by Rebecca Joyce

  She looked at Alex, questioning him with her eyes. “He is ready,” he advised.

  Nodding to him, Annie walked over to the table and looked at the three items. Not thinking, she picked up one of the devices and walked over to him.

  The room was eerily quiet. Looking over her shoulder, she saw her friends, each of their faces void of expressions, as they quietly stood against the wall.

  What was fun had now turned serious. One wrong move and she’d seriously hurt Gabriel.

  Just like he hurt you?

  “Antoinette, I trust you,” Gabriel whispered, bringing her back to the scene at hand. “Just focus on me, little bird, forget about everyone in the room, and look at me. You can do this,” he advised soothingly.

  Taking a deep breath, Annie closed her eyes and focused on the man before her, the one who she loved more than life herself, and the man who broke her heart and walked away from her.

  The whole scene based on trust. Trust she once had for him, but was now gone. Yet, there he stood, strapped to leather cross, bared from the waist up, ready for her to use whatever medium she chose. Gabriel trusted her, and yet she could not trust herself not to hurt him as he hurt her.

  She didn’t like this. She hated the way he lay there, strapped and unable to move. She didn’t like that he couldn’t fight his way free if it became too much. She didn’t want this. It felt too much like the roles were reversed. She was the aggressor, and he the helpless victim. In that moment, she realized why he agreed to do this. This wasn’t about punishment or acceptance. This was about how he felt. With the roles reversed, he gifted her the knowledge of his soul. She now knew how much he regretted hurting her. He hated what he had done to her as she loathed the thought of whipping him.

  Throwing the whip against the wall, Annie screamed, “Say something!”

  When Gabriel just stood there, motionless, Annie ran over to him and lifted his face. Annie watched as her friends quietly left the room, leaving only herself, Gabriel, and Alexander. Turing back to Gabriel, she looked into his eyes, and she saw it.

  It was there all this time, in Gabriel’s eyes. The pain, regret, and sorrow.

  She saw it all, shining reverently through his silver eyes. He knew he made a terrible mistake, and he wanted to atone for all of his wrongdoings. So he willingly stood there, trusting her to do the right thing.

  “Why did you do it?” she cried as tears fell in waves down her face.

  “I thought I was doing the right thing,” he cried.

  “For who, Gabe?”

  “I couldn’t bear it if anything happened to you. When Matthew told me that the town would be bankrupt, I knew that would hurt you. I looked at you, praying you would give me some hint as to what to do, but all I saw was pity and regret. I couldn’t bear that,” he whispered as tears rolled down his handsome face. Annie felt as if her heart was breaking in two. She could handle many things, but not seeing her strong, determined Gabriel crumble before her.

  “Gabriel, I never pitied you, and I never regretted anything. I was scared. I still am. However, what you did was wrong. You hurt me as no other ever had. Why didn’t you just talk to me? I could have helped.”

  “I’ve never trusted anyone that much before. I have always done what I thought was best, never considering who might get hurt in the process. I am so sorry for that, Antoinette.”

  “You can’t continue to live like that, Gabe. You have to learn to trust someone. We all love you, and we all want to help, but you have to let us.”

  “I trust you,” he whispered softly, caressing her cheek. It was then that she realized that Alex had never secured him to the cross. Gabriel had willing stood there of his own free will and gave himself up into her care.

  It was humbling.

  Shaking her head, she whispered, “I don’t understand any of this.”

  “I hurt you, Antoinette. I hurt the woman I love above all others. I did this so you would know how sorry I am and learn to trust me again as I have always trusted you. I knew you would never hurt me. It’s not in your nature, but you needed to realize that. I love you.”

  “You’re wrong. You never trusted me enough to help you.”

  She watched as Alexander walked over and sat down beside the cross, and asked, “Why did you do this, brother?”

  “There comes a time when all is lost that a man must endure the greatest pain imaginable to secure the woman he loves the most. And for that alone, I will kneel before her until she weeps no more,” she heard him answer as he looked directly at her.

  “What if she went through with it?” Alex angrily asked.

  “But she didn’t.” Gabriel smiled at her.

  Annie wasn’t sure of what to do now that the scene was over. Her mind was spinning with his words. She was more confused than ever. She needed to think. She couldn’t breathe.

  Walking toward the door, she felt his hand touch her shoulder. Annie didn’t bother turning around. She couldn’t. If she did, she would give into him, and she wasn’t ready to forgive him just yet.

  She needed her space.

  “Please, don’t go.” She heard his soft plea.

  “I can’t stay.”

  “Just stay with me. We can go somewhere quiet, where we won’t be disturbed. Let me show you what trust truly feels like. Please allow me that.”

  Because she didn’t trust her own voice, Annie simply nodded.

  “I’ll give you two some time. If you need me, I’ll be at the ranch,” Alex said, kissing her cheek. She didn’t want him to leave, but she couldn’t open her mouth to stop him.

  * * * *

  Gabriel was watched her closely as she walked quietly into his private residence. Though she said nothing, he knew the night’s events had seriously rattled her. He wished she would talk, but he did not force the issue, knowing his little bird would speak when ready.

  “These are my private quarters. You are the first person I have brought here.”

  “Why?” she asked, looking around the vast space.

  “I can be myself here. There is no one here to judge me or condemn me.”

  “I would never do those things, Gabe. I love you, all of you.”

  “I know that now.”

  “You should have realized that before all of this happened,” she admonished, and he sighed, knowing she was right. He had made some horrible mistakes where she was concerned, and now it was time to come clean and atone for his sins.

  “Come, I want to show you something,” he said, grabbing her hand.

  Guiding her down the long hallway, he stopped at a door, but before he opened it, he turned to her and said, “This is my sanctuary. No one has ever been in here.”

  Stepping aside, he let her pass and watched as she entered the room.

  Instantly, her laughter filled the vast space, and his heart warmed at the sultry sounds.

  “This is your sanctuary, a kitchen?” She smiled brilliantly.

  “Yes. I’ll have you know that when I’m stressed or need to think, I like to cook. It’s very therapeutic.”

  “Are you any good?”

  “Shall I demonstrate for you?”

  “Please.” She said as she sat at the bar.

  Gabriel wasted no time, and within minutes, the delicious aromas of herbs and spices began filling the room. He could already feel the tension fleeing his body as he quietly created a meal just for her. She never said anything as he moved around the kitchen, and he was grateful for that. He, too, needed time to think and compose himself.

  As he placed the lid on the skillet, he grabbed two wine glasses, placing them before her. Reaching for a bottle of red wine, he poured her a glass and then himself.

  “I need to tell you something, something about myself,” he softly said, looking at her for permission to begin.

  “I’m listening.”

  “I am by nature a Dominant. I live by a strict code of laws. I need to control every aspect of my life and those I bring into my life. I may at times be
harsh and unyielding, but never, for one minute, think I do not care about you. Because of my selfishness, I made the terrible mistake of hurting two people I love the most,” he said, taking a sip of his wine. Her quiet reverence was confusing him. She gave nothing away.

  “Continue.”

  “I am not a nice person, Antoinette. From a very young age, I needed control in everything I did. I still do. That night at the McDaniel party, I lost control, and never regained it. My life changed that night, and over the last couple of weeks, my life spiraled out of control until it erupted, destroying everything in its wake. I broke your soul that night in England, and for that you’ll never know how truly sorry I am.”

  “What I don’t understand is why you felt you had to hurt me,” she asked. Gabriel knew if she was ever going to forgive him, he was going to have to come clean about everything in his life. He dreaded this conversation, but if he wanted her back, he was going to have to trust her with the information.

  “I did not have a happy childhood like Alexander. My father married for money. After my mother conceived, my father went back to his whores, only returning when it was required of him. My mother lived and breathed my father. Everything she did was for him. She never cared what I did, only that I did not interfere when my father showed up. If it were not for Alexander, I probably would have ended up in jail or worse. I was a very disturbed child. There was nobody to control my tendencies or actions. When my father died, I thought my mother would want to spend time with me, but I was wrong. She fell into a deep depression, and shortly before my twelfth birthday, she killed herself.

  “I was out playing and came home to grab something to eat. I walked into my mother’s sitting room, and that is where I found her, crying with a gun to her head. I begged her repeatedly to put the gun down. I asked her to live for me. She just looked at me and grinned. ‘Never fall in love. It only breeds heartbreak and destruction.’ Then she pulled the trigger.

  “I went to live with my grandfather after that, and when he died, I inherited everything. The day my mother killed herself was the day my life changed. I no longer cared for childish ways. I considered them useless. I closed myself off, refusing to allow anyone to get close to me again. You see, I loved my mother, but she only loved my father. When she died, I stopped trying to gain acceptance, and lived my life as I wanted to live. I knew that by controlling everything in my life, I could distance myself from feeling anything. That is, until I met you.”

  “But you had Alex,” she said, never taking her eyes off him.

  “Yes, I always had Alexander. He was the only person who knew what I was really like. He accepted me for who I was, and he helped me to understand. You see, Alexander was always happy and carefree. He had two devoted and loving parents, something I always craved. He never begrudged me anything. We played together, went to school together, and he even helped me open the club in London. He was always there by my side. I trusted him like no other, but when my grandfather died, I found out that Alexander was my true brother, and something changed. We were seeing a young woman at the time, and because I could not handle the revelation, I pushed them both away. The young woman started seeing other people, and Alex blamed me when she was badly hurt. After that, I packed a bag, left England, and moved here.”

  “Where you met me.” She smiled.

  “Yes.”

  “Gabe, we cannot control who our parents are, but we can control our own selves. I won’t even try to comprehend what you felt growing up, but you must see that your actions afterward shaped the man you are today. You did that consciously. You chose to live in a controlled environment, and I get why you did that, but you cannot assume that everyone close to you will hurt you. You only hurt yourself in the end. Closing yourself off not only hurts you but those who really love you, like Alex and me. We love you, Gabriel. We would never consciously hurt you. We only want to be a part of your life, but you have to let us in. Trust that no matter what, we will always be there for you. Yes, we will fight and argue, but we will learn from each other.”

  “I’m sorry I hurt you,” he whispered, unable to look her in the eye. He knew she was right. Alex had told him the same thing growing up, but he never understood, until now. “Can you forgive me?”

  Gabriel watched as emotions played out in her eyes. He worried that he might have said too much, but everything was out now. He could not take it back. He was just going to have to trust her with the information and let her come to her own conclusions. He felt as if his life was hanging in the balance. One word from her and she would either save him or destroy him.

  Needing to do something, he turned his attention back to the meal he was cooking and finished the final preparations. Grabbing two plates from the cabinet, he dished out the meal and placed a plate before her. She smiled at him when he handed her a fork.

  Waiting as she tried the meal, he watched as joy flittered across her face.

  “Oh wow. This is really good,” she said, taking another bite.

  “I am happy you like it,” he said before taking a bite himself.

  They ate in silence, never saying a word. When she was done, Gabriel took her plate and placed it in the sink. The silence was killing him. He wished she would say something. Unable to stand the silence anymore, he walked over to her.

  Taking her hands in his, he kissed her fingers. “Please forgive me, Antoinette. Please give me the chance to make it up to you. Please trust me again.”

  * * * *

  Annie knew she must give him an answer, but as always, his nearness sent her lust in to overdrive, and it wasn’t helping with him kissing and licking her fingers. Her breasts hardened as they pushed against her top. Her panties, which she picked out so carefully, were now soaking wet. She unconsciously squirmed, rubbing her legs together, giving him the knowledge of what he was doing to her.

  He smiled devilishly. “Is there something wrong, little bird?”

  “No,” she whispered.

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes,” she said softly, squirming again in her seat.

  His carefree laugh sent her body into overdrive instantly.

  “Ah, little bird, I think you are lying to me and to yourself. Do you need me?”

  Yes, damn it!

  “No,” she lied. His proximity was driving her crazy, the smell of him clean and male. She wanted to skip ahead and have him thrusting hard into her.

  She did not stop him when he bent down and began kissing her neck, melting her a little bit more. Then she heard him softly whisper into her ear, “Antoinette, forgive me. Trust me once more,” taking her hand and putting it on his leather pants as she felt the protruding rigidness of his hard cock.

  Annie gasped.

  Placing another gentle kiss on her neck, he said, “I want you, Antoinette.”

  Annie moaned as he stepped back as if nothing happened while she was coming utterly undone. He had barely touched her, yet she felt the familiar build.

  Reacting visibly now, Annie could not believe her arousal had surfaced so fast inside her.

  “I won’t do anything until you give me permission,” he whispered as his breath tickled her neck.

  Annie couldn’t control her body. She was spiraling out of control. Clenching her legs together, she closed her eyes, feeling his throbbing cock through his leather pants. His hand was still on hers, keeping it secured against his pants as she felt his cock pulse.

  “I am so close,” she whimpered. She couldn’t believe that the mere sound of his seductive voice was having this impact on her body. She had never felt anything like it before. It was unreal, something she never thought possible. The sheer control of his voice was enough to send her into the stars, and she was letting it happen.

  “Tell me what you want, little bird,” he asked her.

  Annie looked directly into his eyes, letting him see her sheer need for her release.

  “Antoinette,” Gabriel barely whispered in that erotic voice of his, and that was all it took
. She flew.

  Her body imploded right there in front of him, clenching and screaming out in ecstasy, as she reached for him, needing him more than she ever needed anything in this world as he used her hand to push up and down on his cock.

  “That’s it, little bird, fly,” he soothed, holding her close as her body reached for the heavens. Coming back to earth, she watched him as he took her hand off his cock and walked her down a long hall. Opening a set of double doors, he motioned her into the large master bedroom, beautifully decorated in blacks and whites. She watched as he stood by the large king bed in the middle of the room.

  “I love you, Antoinette. I don’t expect you to forgive me for what I have done. We don’t have to do anything, but I would like to sleep with you. Just hold you, nothing more, if that’s okay with you?” he asked.

  Annie simply nodded okay, unable to speak. She was in shock. He had just told her that he loved her. Finally, after all these years, he said the words she so longed to hear.

  She watched as he walked over to a dresser and pulled a white T-shirt out, handing it to her. Taking it, she laid it on the bed and started to undress. She watched as Gabriel silently took his clothes off and slipped naked under the sheets.

  Raising an eyebrow, she looked at him. He smiled and said, “I sleep naked. Is that going to be a problem? If it is, I am sure I have pajamas somewhere.”

  “No, it’s all right,” she said softly, pulling the T-shirt over her head and sliding in next to him. She heard his breathing, the loud thumping of his heart, his breaths coming in gasps as she snuggled closer to him.

  Then, she felt him.

  “You know we’re not going to be able to sleep, right?” she asked, looking up at him.

  “I said I just wanted to sleep. I will not do anything that you are not ready for. I can handle my own desires.”

  “You might be able to, but I don’t have that discipline,” she said, slowly moving her hand up his chest.

  “Antoinette, what are you doing?”