He narrowed his eyes as he studied me, and then suddenly, his hands went to my waist and he stepped into my space. There was a fire in his gaze that took my breath away. My entire body froze, not out of fear, but out of anticipation.
“Are you sure?” he asked. His voice was low and deep and sent tingles shooting down my spine.
I nodded. I was fairly certain that if I spoke, he wouldn’t hear me anyway.
His hands slipped to my back as he pulled me against him. My hands braced me on his chest, my fingers sprawling out across his muscles. He touched my chin and pressed upward. I allowed him to position my face. He held my gaze one last time before he dipped down and pressed his lips to mine.
Fireworks exploded inside of me as the warmth and pressure registered in my mind. At first, I was shocked from the sensation, but then a hunger emerged that I hadn’t known existed inside of me. I didn’t want this to be a fake kiss. I wanted this to be real. My hands slid up his chest to his neck, where my fingers threaded through his hair. I rose up onto my tiptoes as I pulled him closer. My mouth moved against his with a passion I’d never experienced.
Liam dipped down to wrap his arms around my waist and pull me off my feet. He turned to press me against the wall, keeping one arm tightly around me while the other one was used to cage me in.
I parted my lips, and he responded. I wanted this kiss to mean something. This was my only shot to get Liam to look at me as someone other than his therapist or the nerdy girl from high school. I wanted him to feel the same passion for me that I felt for him.
“Ugh, get a room.” The deep voice cut through the hazy cloud that filled my mind.
I pulled back to see one of my neighbors hurry by us with a disgusted look on his face.
Liam didn’t respond. Instead, he lowered me to ground while placing both hands on either side of me.
I wasn’t sure what to say. While we’d been kissing, I could pretend that it was real. But now? How did someone end a mind-blowing kiss as if it hadn’t just wholly and completely changed them?
“That was … intense,” I whispered.
Liam’s lids were heavy, but he didn’t respond.
Oh my gosh, I’d just thrown myself at him, pouring all my feelings, pent-up crush, and desire to kiss him into those few moments. I’d fallen for the whole Liam McKnight experience like any other girl.
His face was inches away, as he was leaning down toward me. There was a storm inside of him, but I wasn’t sure what that meant. Maybe he felt what I did. More likely, he realized that my feelings had crossed a line and he wasn’t sure how to let me down easily.
I didn’t want to confuse him, and I didn’t want him thinking that I’d read into this more than I should have. Even though my heart was breaking that I’d just had the best kiss of my life and there wouldn’t be a repeat, I could still be a professional. He’d hired me for a job, and it was time that I stepped up and did the right thing.
“Well, I think if this is what you do on a date, the next girl you take out is going to be quite the lucky duck,” I said. My lips felt swollen, and I reached up to gingerly touch them.
“Next date?” Liam asked.
I nodded, even as my heart shriveled like a grape in the desert sun. “Yes. As your therapist, I would give you a ten out of ten on your effort and your …” I cleared my throat. “… kiss.”
Liam’s gaze dropped down to my lips, and my entire body heated again. I wanted him to pull me back into his embrace. I wanted him to kiss me once more, not because I was his therapist, but because I was the woman he wanted.
My brain screamed, Tell him you need another kiss to be sure. I slammed the brakes on that. If Liam kissed me again for any other reason than loving me one hundred percent, I would break. And there would be no more putting me back together.
“I should go,” I said, forcing a yawn. “Big day ahead of me tomorrow.” I slipped down and stepped out of his arms to free myself from the trance that came from being this close to him.
Liam pushed off the wall and moved to stand behind me as I pulled out my keys. “Heather, I—”
“Want to know my assessment, I get it,” I hurried to cut him off. Whatever he was going to say, I didn’t want to hear it. After all, he’d prefaced our kiss as showing me what he would do on a date. If he went on to explain that it was just a demonstration and he didn’t mean anything by it, I was going to evaporate on the spot. I needed a moment away from him so I could wrap my heart up tight. “I’ll have it ready for you tomorrow.”
The lock disengaged, so I hurried to turn the handle and slip inside. I hated how confused Liam looked, but I couldn’t be therapist Heather right now. Right now, I was woman Heather.
And woman Heather’s heart was breaking.
Just before I shut the door, I paused and met his gaze. No matter how this evening ended, it had been a magical night. “Thank you,” I whispered.
Liam studied me, and his lips parted. Before he could say anything, I shut the door. Now alone, I collapsed against the wall and slid down. I buried my face in my knees as I allowed my tears to fall.
No matter how much I wanted to believe that he could care for me, that was a fantasy that was never coming true. Liam McKnight would never see me as more than a therapist or more than a high school tutor. I was in love with Liam, and I was fairly certain he would never feel the same.
If I was going to survive this heartbreak, I needed an out right now. I needed to walk away. Even if that was the hardest thing I’d ever have to do, I would do it. It was my only choice.
Chapter Fifteen
Liam
Thursday
“I thought I knew women,” I mumbled as I mindlessly ate my way through a big bowl of oatmeal with sliced peaches and honey. The breakfast was a default thanks to my trainer’s ability to … well, train me to eat better. It certainly didn’t come from thinking through my choices, because all of my brain power had been tunneled into figuring Heather.
She was a mystery. One minute she was critiquing my dating skills, and the next she was kissing me like she—well, like she loved me and wanted me and … hungered for me.
I rolled my eyes at myself. That didn’t sound big-headed at all. But it was the truth. I’d tasted desire on her tongue. I couldn’t deny that. But then, she’d shut the door in my face and promised my assessment would be forthcoming. Which had been a blow to my ego. After all, the last thing I felt I needed an assessment on was my kissing. Sure, my dating skills could be better. But not my kissing. That I had in the bag.
Besides, there was no way she could fake a kiss like that. Trust me, I’d faked lots of kisses in my day. I’d done enough charity auctions and kissing booths to know the difference between a wanted kiss and an obligated kiss. I paused as I remembered the women after a fake kiss. They’d been satisfied, pleased with themselves, and generally happy with the way things had gone. Probably because they’d read into my actions what they’d wanted to find.
I scrubbed my hand down my face, shoveled the last of the oatmeal in my mouth, and headed to the sink to wash out my bowl.
It was just … despite the fact that I’d wanted authenticity from Heather’s lips, I knew what I’d felt. I couldn’t have made it all up. At least some part of her wanted me. I was about ninety-nine percent sure of that. And that was what was eating me alive. I liked being certain. And Heather made me feel anything but.
“Hey, Siri, why are women so confusing?” I asked the assistant speaker device on the counter.
There was a beep followed by Siri’s monotone voice. “I don’t understand the question, and I resent you for asking.”
I blinked. No way. Laughing, I shook my head, giving props to the programmer who’d thought that Easter egg up.
Well, I wasn’t going to figure anything out standing around in my kitchen. I needed something to do to distract me. I glanced at Lottie’s list, which was now stuck on the fridge, and pulled out my phone to call Heather. I needed to get my Heather issue in orde
r; then I’d be in the head space to tackle Lottie’s to-dos.
“Hello?” She sounded professional, and I pictured her in her office wearing one of her politician-type suits and her hair pulled back into a bun. And she looked beautiful. Blast.
“Hey, what are you up to?” I asked, clearing my throat in an attempt to focus my thoughts.
“I’m on my way to Zumba.” She sounded out of breath the more she spoke. Suddenly, her professor appearance as gone, and all I could focus on was Heather wearing yoga pants with her hair pulled back, allowing curls to cascade down and frame her face.
My entire body heated at that thought. “Really?” I squeaked out.
“Every Friday morning,” she replied.
Friday. That was strange to hear. That meant it was only a week ago that I’d barged into her office and demanded that she allow me to buy her for a week. It also meant that tomorrow was the gala. Which meant our time was coming to a close. And that thought created an ache inside of my chest. I wasn’t ready to let her go. “Can I come?” I blurted. Then I closed my eyes and cursed myself for sounding so needy. What was wrong with me?
She paused and then cleared her throat. “You want to Zumba?” she asked.
Maybe this was one of those times when the ladies all took the class to watch the hot instructor strut his stuff. I flexed. I’d stack my stuff up against some aerobics guy any day.
“Yeah, I got skills.” I automatically flexed as if she were in the room to see. And then I felt like a dork. I was a mess. When it came to Heather, I didn’t know what to do. Nothing felt right. All of my normal moves didn’t seem good enough.
Her laugh was sweet and felt like music to my ears. “That’s right, Fast-feet McKnight.”
I grinned. Why did my nickname sound so sexy coming out of her mouth? “You know it. I bet I can Zumba better than you.”
“Mhmm.” That was all she said in response before she grew silent, and then she finally sighed heavily as if she was resigning herself to the knowledge. “You’re probably right.” I heard her blinker go on. “I guess if you want to come, it would be a good place to practice talking to women.”
My hopes sank. I didn’t want to talk to women; I wanted to be with her. But if this was my in, then I’d take it. “Text me the address.”
We said goodbye and hung up. I took the stairs two at a time and burst into my bedroom while waiting for the text to ding. I changed into a pair of jogging shorts and a sleeveless workout shirt. No use putting the guns in a holster. In a locker room full of linemen who were twice my size, I didn’t brag them up. But in a regular gym, I was going to flaunt these bad boys. If Heather didn’t go all splotchy red when she saw me, then I’d give Lottie fifty bucks—just for the heck of it.
I was already in my car by the time the text came through. The gym wasn’t far from my place, and as soon as I pulled into the parking lot, I scanned for Heather. I located her car, but she wasn’t in it. I strode inside, and after I paid for a day pass, I went on the hunt to locate her.
The gym layout was familiar enough that I didn’t have trouble finding the classrooms. I saw a bunch of brightly dressed women, all laughing, walk into studio B. It might be my woman radar, but I instinctively followed after them. The last woman held the door open for me, giggling as she glanced up at me through her lashes. I gave her a smile and stepped into the studio.
Just as I did, the entire room froze and everyone turned to look at me. About fifteen women, in various workout outfits that ranged from sports bras to baggy tee shirts, stared wide-eyed in my direction. I gave them all a sheepish smile and shoved my hand through my hair. I might have made a huge mistake.
Heather rolled her eyes and motioned for me to come to her. I smiled at everyone as I passed them by, hoping to get them to stop staring. Talking to Heather was hard enough, but doing it in a fishbowl was worse. There was no way she’d loosen up enough in front of people to give me any indication of what last night meant to her and if she felt the same as I did.
“So …” I swung my arms and clapped my hands together in front of me. “This is Zumba?” I glanced around. Thankfully, the sound in the room returned to normal as the newness of my appearance wore off.
She shook her head as she pulled her hair back into a low ponytail. “This will be Zumba.”
A woman in a baggy tee and leggings approached. Her shoes were bright white with yellow stripes. “Are you the instructor?” she asked, her hazel eyes full of fear. “This is my first week. I don’t know if I’m up to all that.” She waved her hand, indicating my physique.
Heather snickered behind me.
“No, ma’am.” I smiled warmly. This lady was perfect. I could buddy up with her and keep the other women at bay while trying to figure out how Heather felt about me. Besides, I didn’t like the way she psyched herself out before the class even began. All she needed was a little confidence. “This is my first week too. How about we stick together and help each other out?”
She glanced at the younger ladies in the class as if measuring herself against them. “I’d like that. Can my daughter come too?”
Daughter? I followed her line of sight only to discover a woman with a shy smile on her face standing off to the side. She gave me a small wave, and maybe it was out of instinct, but I focused on her ring finger only to discover that it was bare. Wonderful. Even when I was trying to avoid single ladies, I ended up attached to one. “Sure. The more, the merrier.”
She motioned for her daughter to come over, and they introduced themselves.
When it was my turn, I reached behind me for Heather and pointed towards her. “She’s the whole reason I’m here.”
Heather looked up, and I was able to catch her gaze. Her eyebrows rose, but I didn’t break the connection I felt. I wanted her to know the truth behind my words.
She blinked a few times and then turned her attention to the mother-and-daughter duo. She smiled and talked with them while I changed into my gym shoes. I knew gym etiquette like the back of my hand.
I was almost finished with tying my shoes when Heather came over and sat on the bench next to me. She looked calm, which helped me relax, Plus, I was grateful for a few minutes alone. I needed to know where we stood but was waiting for the right time to ask it.
Heather stretched out her arms and then tipped her head to the side, bringing her whole body closer to me. She smelled like coconuts and mangoes. Which made me think of my trip to the Bahamas. Which then led to the thought of what it would be like to take a trip with Heather. And then Heather in a bikini at the beach … I mentally shook myself and came into the conversation too late.
“… opportunity for you to work on your approach.”
“My approach to what?” I asked, trying to catch up.
“To women you don’t know. Like, instead of flirting and implying a good time, getting to know them and showing an interest in them as people.”
I stared. “What are you talking about?”
Heather waved toward the two women she’d just walked away from. “Georgia and Teya. I think they would be perfect for you to test your new skills on.”
“What?” She wanted me to hit on someone? “How exactly am I going to do that here?” I was here to spend time with the woman I wanted. Heather. Not Teya. Even though she looked like a perfectly nice woman, she wasn’t the one I wanted. As far as I was concerned, there was no need to work on my approach.
Her eyes cut to Georgia and her daughter. “Talk to her. See if you can get her number.”
“Pft,” I scoffed. Getting a number would be cake.
“Not in the old Liam way.” She bumped me with her shoulder. “Use those new skills, big guy. Be interested in what she’s interested. Ask her about herself.”
Heather’s eyes were everywhere but on me. Something about this conversation made her uncomfortable. Hmmm. Could she be jealous of Teya? No. That couldn’t be it. After all, she had to know how I felt. I’d all but tattooed it to my forehead last night. Maybe she wa
s forcing me to flirt because she was still on the clock. I couldn’t wait for our stupid contract to be up.
As much as I didn’t want to, I wasn’t going to just sit back and not obey my therapist. If she wanted me to flirt, I’d give it my all. The petty side of me was intrigued by how she took watching me flirt with another woman. That was a huge tell. If she got upset, then I’d know she was into me. If not, then she really wasn’t into me and was just a really good therapist.
Was it wrong to hope she sucked at her job?
“Okay.” I hopped up as if I were as eager to do this—which I wasn’t. At all.
Heather followed more slowly. I hoped that signaled her lack of enthusiasm because she wasn’t sure about asking me to do this.
The instructor came in—a woman wearing a microphone headset. She hit a button on the wall, and loud music pumped through the speakers in the front. Thankfully, they were positioned so the back of the room wasn’t as loud as the front. I could still have a conversation if I wanted to.
I stood next to Georgia and Teya, with Heather moving about ten feet away on my left.
“Hi, everyone. I’m Brandi.”
There was a collective cheer that went up. I was a beat too late, but I clapped along with everyone else. I peeked over at Heather, who was watching me, and when I caught her eye, she dropped her gaze.
“I’m so excited for class today. I’ve been working on a new routine. We’ll start with the basic step and then add to it. Okay? Okay. Let’s go.” Brandi started jumping side to side, which got the other women picking up their feet.
Jumping I could do. But what she morphed that jumping into lost me. I studied her moves. She stepped forward, then back, then did something with her hips. Everyone but me seemed to be able to imitate what she was doing. Heather was no help. Which was fine, because when she did come into my line of sight, wearing a cute skirt thing with lots of coins that jingled when she swiveled her hips, my mouth went dry.
His Romance Coach (A McKnight Family Romance Book 5) Page 13