Blitzed by the Brit: A Secret Baby Sports Romance

by Jessica Ashe

  “What was he like?” I asked Tasha, as she headed to the kitchen for ice cream. Ice cream usually meant the sex had been good; apparently orgasms burned calories and therefore she could eat it guilt-free. Not that she ever put on weight anyway. Shouldn’t sisters have similar genes? Why could she eat whatever she wanted, while I had to have tiny portions and fight the constant urge to eat all the junk food Tasha had stashed around the apartment?

  “Good,” she replied. “We’d both been sexting for hours before hand, so the main event didn’t last long, but it didn’t need to.”

  “How did you meet?” I asked. I didn’t really care, but if I could keep the questions coming for long enough, Tasha might just forget to ask about my evening.

  “Online. He’s a highly trained FBI agent who usually works abroad. Said he was just in town for a few days on shore leave.”

  “Um, I don’t think FBI agents work abroad, and they don’t get shore leave.”

  “Oh,” Tasha replied excitedly. “Do you think that means he’s a spy? I’ve always wanted to fuck a spy.”

  “No, I think it means he was lying to get you into bed.”

  “Ah.” She paused and then shrugged her shoulders. “Whatever. An orgasm’s an orgasm. I take it from that look on your face that you didn’t get any tonight?”

  “What look?” I asked, turning to look in the mirror by the doorway. Was I still bright red? Nope, I looked about normal. “I always look like this.”

  “Exactly. So, as usual, no dick for you.”

  “I can assure you, I dealt with a rather large dick tonight.”

  Tasha’s eyes lit up. “Tell me everything,” she said, patting the seat next to her on the sofa.

  I told Tasha how my boss had stood me up and made me go and meet a client by myself. We were usually under pretty strict instructions not to reveal who our clients were, but Tasha and I shared everything. In my case, that meant talking about my studies and work. In her case, it meant telling me about the men she fucked. Occasionally, she talked about her writing if she got something published and happened to feel passionate about it, but that wasn’t often.

  “The party was more like an orgy,” I explained. “One dude had his fingers in a girl in front of everyone.”

  “Oh please, honey, that’s not an orgy. I’ve been to orgies, and that is not one.”

  “When?” I asked in shock. I thought I knew everything about my sister’s sex life, but she still managed to spring surprises on me once in awhile.

  “I dated an older guy at college who took me to one. Oh, and there was that time in Corfu.”

  “I went to Corfu with you.”

  “I snuck off while you were asleep. Anyway, who was this client with the rowdy party?”

  “His name’s Barton Fenner. He’s a quarterback for—”

  “Barton Fenner! Holy shit, you’re kidding me. You went to a Barton Fenner party and didn’t tell me?”

  “It’s not like I had a lot of time to prepare. Besides, it was for work.”

  “My God, I’ve been following that party on Twitter and Instagram. The more he drank the less he wore. I only stopped looking because my fuck came over. Better check for an update.”

  Tasha pulled out her phone and frantically typed in search terms, but ended up disappointed.

  “Nothing you like?” I asked.

  “There are no new photos. I was hoping he’d end up taking out his cock. I’ve heard it’s fucking huge.”

  No new photos? Had he actually listened to me? At least Leona would be pleased.

  “Wait a minute,” Tasha said slowly. “You said you dealt with a massive dick tonight. Does that mean you screwed Barton Fenner?”

  Tasha looked so excited for me—and maybe even a touch jealous—that for a moment I was tempted to say yes. But she’d see through the lie in an instant. Tasha had been right before—I looked just like I always did on a Friday night; tired and unsatisfied. Barton might be an arrogant ass, but there wasn’t much chance he’d leave me unsatisfied.

  “No, I had to deal with him, and he’s a massive dick. Seriously, he’s a piece of shit. So arrogant and full of himself. He was shirtless the entire time I was talking to him.”

  “But there’s a bad side to him as well?”

  “That was….” I trailed off as I remembered who I was speaking to. “Okay, well I guess he’s your type, but not mine.”

  “When was the last time you had sex, little sis?”

  “You know the answer to that question.”

  “Yes, I do, but sometimes I wonder whether you’ve forgotten.”

  “Two years ago,” I replied. “I haven’t had sex for two years. Happy now?”

  “No, I’m far from happy. Kristi, you’re young and beautiful. Go out there and get some dick. At the moment, I’m fucking enough for the both of us and it’s exhausting. You promised to handle your share of the household responsibilities.”

  I laughed. “I promise to get back in the saddle soon, but not with a guy like Barton.”

  “Why not?”

  “I just told you, he’s arrogant, and a complete prick.”

  “And I told you he has a huge cock. Plus, I can always tell when a man is good in bed, and I guarantee you that Barton Fenner is a beast in the sack.”

  That I could believe. He acted on instinct and didn’t seem to have any control over what he did. ‘Beast’ was probably a good word for him.

  “This conversation is pointless. He didn’t want me to work for him, and he didn’t want me to do anything else with him either. I’m not his type.”

  ‘All the women except one.’

  I wasn’t his type, so why had he tried that line on me? He probably just saw me as a challenge. Or maybe that friend of his put him up to it? A dare to see if he could fuck the stuck-up little princess.

  “Stop putting yourself down,” Tasha said firmly. “I wasn’t lying when I said you were beautiful. Now, you said you saw Barton without his shirt on.”

  I nodded. “I tried not to stare at it.”

  “But you did anyway?”

  I nodded again, this time feeling the rush of red return to my cheeks just like they’d done when Barton had been stood in front of me.

  “Okay Kristi. Tell me all about it. And don’t spare a single detail.”

  Chapter 4

  Barton

  “Some of those photos are borderline pornographic,” Gordon yelled at me down the phone. “I don’t know what kind of shit you were allowed to get away with in college, but this is professional football. Key word word being ‘professional.’ ”

  “Listen, boss—” I began.

  “Does it sound like I’m finished talking?” Gordon yelled even louder.

  I vaguely remembered him speaking in a normal voice when I’d first signed for the team, but ever since then I’d only heard him communicate in degrees of yelling. I was starting to really wish I hadn’t come in for training today.

  “This team has a reputation to maintain,” Gordon continued. “I do not want my players photographed in this way.”

  It could have been worse. I’d been getting more and more drunk as the night went on, and if Kristi hadn’t shown up, I would have stuck my dick in those two girls, and probably a few more for good measure.

  But Kristi had shown up, and even after she’d left, I couldn’t find it in me to carry on where I’d left off. I’d snuck out of my own party to go for a walk, but when I got home, I still had an insatiable urge to fuck. There were plenty of willing participants, but I hadn’t wanted any of them.

  Kristi had left her mark on me. I told myself I only wanted her because I couldn’t have her, but there was more to it than that. I wanted her because she was beautiful. So were a lot of women, but Kristi had more to her than the rest of them combined. She’d resisted me. It was a feeling I hadn’t experienced for quite some time.

  In the end, I’d kept my dick in my pants and stayed away from cell phones for the rest of the night. Not that the manager
appreciated my efforts.

  “It was just a bit of fun,” I pleaded to Gordon. He had been a pro footballer back in the day. Surely he remembered what it was like. He was just lucky not everyone carried cameras with them at the time.

  “You’re not paid to have fun,” Gordon replied. “You’re paid to win.”

  “And I will win.”

  Gordon sighed, and this time he did make an effort to lower his voice as he spoke. “Listen, Barton, I get that you’ve been thrust into the limelight a little earlier than expected because of Milton’s injury, but you need to get with the program, and you need to do it quickly.”

  “You said yourself, I’m paid to win. As long as I get the job done on the field, what’s the problem?”

  “The problem is that I’m not going to allow my players to carry on like you do.”

  “What are you implying?” I asked.

  “I’m not implying anything. I’m telling you that if I see more pictures like those from last weekend, you will be dropped from the team.”

  He was bluffing. He had to be bluffing. He couldn’t drop me. The team had already lost one quarterback, and the third choice wasn’t worth much. That’s why they’d picked me in the draft.

  I opened my mouth to reply, but the look on Gordon’s face made it clear he wasn’t in the mood to hear my shit. I had five inches on Gordon, and he was soft around the waist now, but that man scared the hell out of me.

  “I’ll do my best,” I replied.

  “You’d better do more than that. I spoke to your agent the other day and he said you were hiring a team to help with your image. What happened to them?”

  “Um, I think they quit.”

  “Why did they… you know what, I don’t want to know. Either get them to work for you, or hire someone else. Either way, you need to improve your image.”

  I didn’t need to ‘improve’ my image, I needed to clean it up. My sponsors were more than happy with my current escapades. If I made the news while wearing their gear, they didn’t give a shit if I happened to have a tit in my mouth at the time.

  Unfortunately my team didn’t share that attitude. I’d heard rumors that the new owner and the manager were both respectable types, but I’d never imagined they’d try and control my life outside of work. Perhaps I’d been naive, but I was the most highly sought-after player in the draft. Every team in the NFL wanted me. What was it they said about supply and demand? The more demand for a player, the greater the supply of pussy? Something like that. Gordon should be grateful I even bothered to go to training instead of staying at home and getting my dick sucked.

  “I’ll work on it,” I promised reluctantly.

  “You do that,” Gordon replied. “If you don’t, you’re off the team.”

  “Do you have any idea what it’s like to see pictures of your brother sucking a woman’s tit while you’re trying to eat breakfast?”

  I shouldn’t have answered the phone. “Hi, sis, how’re you?”

  “Just trying not to vomit.”

  “You could just not look at the photos,” I suggested.

  I knew where this conversation was heading. There would be another lecture about behaving like an adult, and not wasting this opportunity to make a name for myself. Depending on May’s mood, I might also get to hear about the benefits of being in a loving relationship, like she was with Lance. May couldn’t get it into her head that not everyone was lucky enough to fall in love with and marry the first person they met.

  “I don’t do it on purpose,” May replied. “My friends think it’s hilarious to tag me in the pictures so that I have to see them. Can’t you just keep your clothes on and perhaps leave the nipple biting for the bedroom?”

  “You sound just like my coach.”

  “Gordon has seen them?”

  “Yep. Gave me the speech at training this morning.”

  “You have to be careful, Barton. Gordon won’t take this kind of crap. He has a reputation.”

  “I know, I know. I’ve hired a firm to keep the bad stuff off the internet.” I neglected to mention that Kristi had already quit. There was still time to fix that.

  “Christ, that’s going to cost you a fortune, especially if you carry on like this.”

  “Were you born old?” I asked. “I seem to recall childhood pictures of us from the days when you used to have fun, but perhaps I was imagining them.”

  “I have plenty of fun,” May insisted. “It just happens that my idea of fun isn’t getting wasted and fucking loads of different people.”

  “I can’t help it if I have a high sex drive, sis.”

  “Just because I’m married, doesn’t mean I don’t have a good sex life. You want me to tell you what I got up to with Lance last night after the kids went to bed?”

  “Binge watched House of Cards, knowing you two.”

  “Actually, Lance used those handcuffs we bought for Halloween last year and—”

  “Alright, alright, I get your point. Look, if you must know, I ended up behaving myself this weekend. Didn’t get any action at all.”

  Tugged myself off a few times while thinking about Kristi though. It was no substitute for the real thing, but I had to blow off some steam one way or the other.

  “I don’t care if you have sex, I just want you to be careful, and for it not to end up online. You are being careful, right?”

  “Always am. Wouldn’t want to end up with any kids running around. Not if your little brats are anything to go by.”

  “Those little brats are your niece and nephew, Barton.”

  “They’re a nightmare.”

  “They’re a handful,” May admitted. “Alright, they’re little brats, but don’t tell them I said that. Now, if you do want to be a grown-up and go on an actual date, I know a nice young woman who would like to meet you. She’s an accountant at Lance’s company and—”

  “No, thank you,” I replied immediately. “I don’t do the boring office types.”

  Not unless they looked like Kristi. I’d thought about her most of the weekend. Would I have been so obsessed by her if she hadn’t stood out so much among all the bikini babes at the party? What if I’d just passed her on the street. Would I have noticed her?

  Yeah, damn straight I would have.

  She had looked tantalizing in the tight skirt and blouse, but she’d look a hell of a lot better naked on my bed. All weekend I’d been thinking about how I could have handled it differently. What if I’d turned off the music and told everyone to go home? Would she have stayed then? Maybe. It would’ve pissed off a few mates who got their dicks wet that night, but she’d have been worth it.

  “Don’t say I didn’t offer,” May replied. “You promise to keep tits out of your mouth for the time being?”

  “I promise not to get pictured with a tit in my mouth. How’s that?”

  “It’ll do,” May said with a heavy note of resignation.

  I’d now promised my manager and my sister that I would work on my public image. Those two people had the ability to make my life a living hell, so I’d better at least try.

  My agent could probably hire another firm, but I didn’t want any old idiot looking after my image. I wanted Kristi. Her brief appearance at the party had kept me pussy-free for three days now, and I hadn’t done that to impress my manager.

  If I was going to take orders from someone, it might as well be from someone who looked damn good with the strict teacher vibe. Now I just had to convince Kristi that I was worth the effort. That might be tougher than breaking into the team.

  Chapter 5

  Kristi

  Initially, I had a straightforward lie prepared for my boss. The simple ones were always the best. I planned to tell her that Barton wasn’t at the party, so I’d left and gone home.

  Unfortunately, the lie expanded as I thought it through. I knew Barton or his agent might get in touch with the firm, and admit we had met. That was an easy way for me to get caught out in a lie, so I had to tell Leona I’d met hi
m. Somehow, in expanding the lie, I ended up arriving back at the truth, or at least something closely resembling it.

  The meeting had been a disaster, but somehow it had worked. Sort of. No more pictures of Barton appeared that night, so it looked like I’d done my job. I knew that Barton had still fooled around with women, but he’d obviously been careful. I tried not to think about it too much.

  “So you met with him and explained who you were, but then you left him alone?” Leona asked, after I had finished recounting my only slightly false version of events.

  “Barton was adamant he didn’t want our help,” I said. “I did my best, but in the end he practically kicked me out of the apartment.”

  “Practically? I don’t care if he picked you up and threw you like a football. It was your job to stay on him that night. You can’t leave someone like that on their own.”

  The first time Leona had yelled at me in her office, I’d held back the tears just long enough to make it to the bathroom where I proceeded to bawl like a baby for half an hour. Now, I expected the screams, and just took it on the chin like everyone else.

  If I wanted to work in a place like this after college—and I was far from certain about that—I would have to get used to taking verbal abuse.

  “He fired us,” I replied. “Said he didn’t need a babysitter. I figured you wouldn’t want me to stay there and work if we weren’t getting paid for it.”

  Not that I’m getting paid for any of this bullshit.

  I’d read up on the California rules for interns, and basically if you did anything of benefit to the employer then you should be getting paid. If this job didn’t work out, I could at least sue for a summer’s worth of wages. That might pay off about one percent of my student loans. Maybe.