Accepting His Name

by Tressie Lockwood

  Shakarri didn’t really want to, but Catarina was already off chattering away in three different languages. She assumed the little girl translated everything whenever she spoke English, but she didn’t pay attention enough to know one way or another. Catarina seemed to take after her Uncle Cason for being so friendly when they had met for just a few hours last time she was in California.

  Catarina stopped halfway through a sentence about a llama. Apparently, she didn’t know the word in Spanish or Italian. “Can I sleep with you, Shakarri?”

  “You have your own room, sweet pea, and I’m not sure your papa would allow it.”

  She pouted. “Papà will let me. He won’t care.”

  Shakarri thought she might be right, especially if he didn’t bother coming to the room they shared.

  A knock sounded at the door, and Shakarri called out come in while Catarina jetted for the closet and shut herself inside it. The door opened and there stood the older Italian nanny with flyaway graying hair. Shakarri had met Paxe before, and she seemed like a nice, if harassed, woman who couldn’t always keep up with the energetic Catarina.

  “Shh, don’t tell her I’m here,” Catarina said. Shakarri figured unless the woman was deaf, she heard the loud whisper.

  “Mi scusi, signora. I look for Signorina Catarina.”

  “It’s bedtime, Catarina,” Shakarri announced without giving away the little girl’s hiding place. A moan sounded from the direction of the closet, and Paxe walked over to open the door.

  “Signorina Catarina, we must go to bed, or Papà will be angry with us. Come along.”

  “Papà never gets mad at me,” she insisted.

  “Come along!” Paxe put a little bite in her tone, and Catarina whined all the way out of the room. She kept it up along the hall, her voice fading until Shakarri no longer heard her. Catarina was definitely a spoiled princess, convincing Shakarri it might be a good idea to get back on the pill as soon as possible. All she needed was Ezio to fight her over getting the baby a nanny and letting their child be spoiled until it was impossible to deal with.

  She stood in front of the mirror considering whether she wanted to storm downstairs and tell Ezio what she thought of him letting his lover come to their house. Exhaustion washed over her, and her stomach was still upset. She didn’t feel like dealing with any more of this drama tonight. Maybe Cason was wrong, and he’d already sent the woman home. She could only hope.

  Yawning, she strode to the bed and climbed in. A remote shut off all the lights, and the room was plunged into darkness. On second thought, she decided to stay awake to confront him, but after ten minutes or so she dropped off into a deep sleep.

  Chapter 7

  “Crap!” Shakarri sprang out of bed and promptly fell onto the floor. Her stomach roiled like a stormy sea, and she rolled to her feet dragging the covers into the bathroom. What was left of her sparse dinner went into the toilet bowl. She couldn’t be pregnant already, could she? “Please, no.”

  She’d have to make a doctor’s appointment to see. After she cleaned up, she walked into the bedroom. The covers were tangled in her arms, and when she fell, she had taken the pillows with her. There was no way to figure out if Ezio had laid beside her. She had slept like a rock all night, and very often he rose before she awakened.

  Ticked off, she forgot about getting dressed or combing her hair and left the room. She reached the bottom of the stairs when the horrible laugh reached her from the dining room. Shakarri stomped down the hall and stopped in the doorway. The entire family was there at the table, including Madison looking like she woke in perfect condition every morning. In fact, she wasn’t even wearing the same dress she’d had on the night before. Today, she wore bright red leggings with a yellow top that scarcely covered her midriff. Her auburn hair hung in soft waves about her beautiful face.

  All eyes swiveled toward Shakarri, and Ezio’s gaze skittered down her form, bringing into sharp focus that she had forgotten to change out of her nightie and do her hair. She must look like a freak.

  “Shakarri,” Catarina sing-songed and threw her arms in the air.

  “Call her Auntie Sha,” Cason joked. “She likes that.”

  Ezio pushed his chair back and slowly rose. Shakarri swung around to march back upstairs. She heard his step not far behind her and locked the bedroom door. The doorknob wiggled once.

  “Shakarri, unlock the door,” he said in a low tone.

  She searched her closet for something to wear. Would her doctor see her on short notice? She hoped so.

  Something cracked, and the bedroom door hit the wall. He’d only asked her to unlock it once. The hair on the back of her neck stood on end, and butterflies stirred in her stomach. Ezio appeared in the opening to the closet. She expected the entire household to come running at the noise, but no one else showed up.

  She darted a glance toward him and focused on the clothes. Now was a bad time to realize she hadn’t evaluated him enough to know if he was abusive. As meaty as Ezio was, he could do damage if he decided to hit her.

  Her husband stepped across the threshold, and she rounded on him. “Do you mind? I’m trying to get dressed here.”

  “Never,” he said in a low, threatening tone, “lock my bedroom door against me.”

  She made a sound of disgust. “Your door? I have a right to my privacy.”

  He moved closer, and she couldn’t help stumbling backward a little. She mentally kicked herself for her cowardice. Ezio took another step to close the gap between them. “You’re my wife. There is no privacy between us.”

  “Look, I don’t have time for you. I have to…run a few errands this morning.” Her hand shook a bit when she reached for a blouse.

  Ezio flicked her hand away from the garment and insinuated his bulky form between her and the rack. She had no choice but to back up a step.

  “Why did you lock the door, Shakarri?”

  She stared at him. “Move.”

  “Why did you lock the door?”

  She dared to look into his eyes. He was pissed all right, but his hands were at his sides, not balled into fists. It didn’t look like he was doing his best not to hit her. Perhaps it didn’t even enter his mind to do so. Her own anger skyrocketed when she realized she didn’t have to be afraid of him.

  “Why do you think? Don’t come in here acting all innocent like you don’t know what’s going on.”

  “I’m not aware that I’ve ever behaved innocent in my life.”

  She pressed her lips together, holding back a laugh. Yeah, he was probably born a dominant jerk who demanded he get his baby food when and how he liked it.

  “You know what I mean,” he grumbled. “Explain.”

  “Am I supposed to yip in obedience right here?”

  “If you’re afraid to tell me, you can be assured I’m a reasonable man.”

  “Since when? And who’s afraid of you?” She walked around him and started flinging through clothes on the hangers. The metal scraping over metal gave her a sense of satisfaction. “You just want to live by double standards, and I’m not having it.”

  He covered her hand to stop the noise and waited. She tried to pull away. His grip tightened, and she faced him.

  “If you think I’m going to sit by while your lover stays here, you’re wrong. You can sue me all you want, but I’ll leave you. Today. Right now! I’m not going to deal with that kind of humiliation. I’m a person in case you didn’t realize in the midst of all your spewing out orders!”

  His eyes narrowed. “Who told you Madison is my lover?”

  “Does it matter?”

  “Just because she spent the night doesn’t mean I slept with her.”

  He wasn’t denying that she was his lover. Shakarri felt sick again. She asked herself why she should care if he slept with the woman. They were nothing but business partners in essence. She married him for money and him for a baby. Her stomach rolled over, and she swallowed. No way in the world was he going to know she was sick.


  “I don’t care about your excuses,” she said. “Do what you want, because you can be sure I’m going to do what I want to.”

  “So you’re threatening to leave again? Is that it?”

  “You’re not going to deny she’s your lover?” Stupid, stupid, stupid. Shut up. You don’t care.

  “Don’t you know if your husband slept beside you last night?”

  Embarrassment washed over her. “Whatever. Forget it. Two can play your game, Ezio. I might not be in a position to leave now, but I don’t have to be faithful if you don’t. Come to think of it, I don’t remember that clause being in our contract.”

  He swore and reached for her. She darted away and ran out of the closet. If she had to, she’d wear what she wore the day before and change after he had left the house. Right now she needed some air.

  In the bedroom, she snatched up the clothes she had tossed aside the night before. She realized she had already begun to be spoiled in the short time she lived at the mansion. When she threw her clothes aside, they always disappeared the next morning. A maid straightened her room and made her bed every day.

  Shakarri yanked her nightie over her head and threw it on the bed. She didn’t even consider the fact that she had just stripped in front of him. She scooped up the blouse from the night before to put on, but Ezio yanked it out of her hand and threw it on the floor. She glared at him.

  “We’re not finished…” His gaze swept her from head to foot, and he spun on his heel to march back to the closet. When he returned, he held out a robe. She put it on, feeling less vulnerable. He cleared his throat. “We’re not finished talking.”

  A sense of superiority came over Shakarri. He had done that because he couldn’t think while she was undressed. Maybe the slut didn’t satisfy him as much as she thought. Shakarri shook her head to clear it. This wasn’t the time to feel proud she could still make him want her after he cheated.

  “There’s nothing you have to say I want to hear, Ezio.”

  “I disagree.” His angry gaze raked her again, and he stepped closer and jerked her off her feet with strong hands at her waist. She gripped his shoulders, kicking her feet and struggling against his chest.

  “Put me down, idiot!”

  He wound an arm around her and drew her close enough that his lips brushed her ear. “I’ve told you before, you belong to me. If another man touches you, he will regret it.”

  She punched his shoulder as hard as she could. He acted like he didn’t feel a thing. “Let go.”

  He set her on her feet again, and she scrambled away from him. To her annoyance, her body came alive during the struggle with him. The intensity in Ezio’s gaze said he was just as affected. If she didn’t get out of there, she would lose all self-respect and strip the robe off again.

  “You’re all talk,” she said. “There’s no way you’re going to attack someone and risk getting sued. He would take you for everything you’re worth.”

  He grinned as if he wished someone would challenge him. “By all means, try me.”

  Nervousness crawled along her skin. “If you don’t tell her to leave, I will. If you think you’re going to sleep around right in my face, you’re wrong. I don’t care if this is just an arrangement. I won’t be disrespected any more than you will.”

  His anger seemed to drain away in an instant. “Had you asked me directly, I would have told you. I have no problem telling you the truth. Madison is not my lover. She hasn’t been for years. She would like to rekindle things, but I’ve lost interest. She stayed last night because she had just come in from a twelve-hour flight. I consider Madison to be a friend and nothing more. Now, does that appease you?”

  If it’s the truth.

  She had no way of knowing if it was the truth, but Ezio did come across as a man who made a habit of saying exactly what he wanted and wasn’t ashamed of his personal choices. Then again, she was sure he would stoop to lying if it would accomplish his goals. She hated the turmoil he caused to her equilibrium.

  Shakarri belted the robe tighter. “She still wants you. She’s got to go.”

  Amusement colored his handsome face. “Very well.”

  Shakarri swung away to head to the closet. Ezio walked to the door and stopped when he spotted the damage he’d done. “Shakarri?”

  She tensed. “Yeah?”

  “Lock the door against me again, and I will replace the door with one that doesn’t have a lock on it.”

  She picked up something to throw at the back of his head, but he was gone. He always had to have the last word. She had just been thinking she had won the argument and felt satisfied she had upped him for once. Then he had to spring that lock crap on her. He took the wind right out of her sails.

  “Oh, he makes me so mad,” she muttered to herself. He would probably tell her she needed a thousand more years of life before she could best him, and she stomped up and down the length of her closet, unable to focus enough to choose something to wear.

  A short time later, Shakarri left her room fully dressed. As soon as she did, she noticed Goro at the end of the hall. He spoke into his cell phone, and seconds after she heard steps on the stairs. Wondering what was up, she moved toward them to find a man holding a toolbox ascending from the first floor.

  She knew right away what was going on. Ezio had already given the order for the bedroom door to be replaced, and the man to do it had arrived while she was getting dressed. Goro had stood watch for when she came out so the repairman could get started. Goodness, people ordered their lives by her husband. It didn’t make sense.

  “Auntie Sha,” Catarina shouted from down the hall.

  Shakarri spotted the little face peeking out from a doorway. “Hey, baby. You don’t have to call me that. Your uncle was just teasing.”

  “I like Sha.”

  She shrugged. “Whatever strikes your fancy, but I’m your stepmother not your aunt.”

  “Step?” Catarina’s eyes grew wide, and Shakarri could only imagine what she must be thinking.

  “Never mind. Maybe I should call you Cat. It’s cute, don’t you think?”

  Catarina squealed in delight. “I like cats.”

  “No one has ever called you Cat for short?”

  “No.” She screwed up her little face as she thought about it. “Nonna calls me Catarina il mio po ’di sole.”

  Shakarri worked out the meaning and determined it was something like my little sunshine. “Goodness, she calls you that every time?”

  Cat giggled. “Yes. Come see my room, Mamma Sha.”

  A warm feeling washed over Shakarri. She followed Cat from the hall into her room and paused at the explosion of color. Cat must own every toy that was ever made in the history of entertaining kids, and her room was literally bigger than Shakarri’s old apartment. “Wow, honey, I don’t remember there being this much stuff in here when your dad took me on a tour of the house. Did your toys multiply?”

  Cat ran to the double closet doors and threw them wide. “See? My clothes.”

  “They grew too!”

  The little girl was getting a kick out of Shakarri’s shock. She bounced and spun, swinging her arms and grinned as if she had performed magic to make the items increase. “I’m here now.”

  “I know you’re here, sweetheart. I can see you.”

  She stopped spinning and wobbled a bit. “No, I’m here from now on. I live with Papà forever and ever.”

  Shakarri gaped. “F-full-time?”

  Ezio never told her his daughter would come to live with them. In fact, he had been clear in telling her Cat didn’t stay with him as often as he might have liked because he was so busy with work. Was this in his plan all along? If it was, he was going to hear from her. Not that she expected him to dump Cat on her. It was obvious that Cat still had her nanny, and no one had awakened Shakarri that morning to get her to look after Cat. Their way of doing things around here still came across as unnatural, but Shakarri needed to know if there was a change in what Ezio expected.
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  After she played with Cat a while, Paxe put the little girl down for a nap amidst loud complaints that she was practically a grown-up and didn’t need naps anymore. How three-years-old was almost grown, Shakarri didn’t know.

  Chuckling, Shakarri headed to the door, but Paxe stopped her on the way. “Signora, thank you for playing with Signorina Catarina. She lonely, but you make her feel better.”

  Shakarri paused. “Lonely? She’s got you and her dad, and she hasn’t been here that long.”

  “I different. Her mamma no longer keep her.”

  “Oh, you mean because they decided she would live with Ezio from now on? I don’t have kids, but I can’t imagine how she gave up her baby. Not even for visitation every other day. I would want my little girl with me all the time.”

  The nanny twisted her hands and looked away. “She not have a choice. Signore Ezio—” Her eyes widened, and she clamped her lips together, looking horrified that she’d been about to gossip about Ezio.

  I don’t blame her. She doesn’t know me. I might go back and tell him for all she knows.

  A new thought struck Shakarri. “Are you trying to say Ezio bullied her into giving up her daughter?”

  The nanny bustled toward the closet. “I have to get Signorina Catarina’s closet straight before she wakes up. Per favore, have a good day, signora.”

  Shakarri started to follow her but then determined what was the use. Paxe had said all she would say. She wasn’t the gossiping type, and Shakarri let it go. Besides, she had been able to make an appointment with her doctor for that day and needed to get to it on time.

  She left Cat’s room and headed downstairs. The house lay in silence, but as soon as her foot touched down on the first floor, Goro appeared from out of thin air. “Signora, Pete will go with you today.”

  She frowned. “Who?”

  He gestured, and another silent man stood some feet away. His broad shoulders and thick arms said bodyguard. “I haven’t chosen a bodyguard yet.”

  Goro reddened. “Pete will go with you today.”