We're All Broken

by O. L. Gregory

  “Well, maybe I am and I just haven’t figured it out, yet,” Charlotte said.

  “Have you ever been attracted a woman?” I asked.

  “Well, no,” Charlotte said.

  “Well, it’s not like you ever had to try to be attracted to a guy, you just were,” Sophie said.

  “Guys suck,” Charlotte said, dumping the spaghetti in the pot and turning to us.

  Kelly and Sophie nodded. “A lot of them do,” Kelly said sagely. “I was married to a big, huge cheater.”

  I just kept my mouth shut.

  “Hold on,” Sophie said, turning to Kelly, “you used to be married to someone else?”

  “Yes, years ago. And it’s how I know a lot of men most definitely suck.”

  “Penny doesn’t think they suck,” Charlotte said.

  “You cannot compare yourself to her,” Kelly said. “She just got lucky and found a good one early. Then somehow had the sense to keep hold of him. But trust me when I tell you, that is not the norm.”

  “And Logan isn’t perfect,” I added. “You have to love someone despite their imperfections.”

  “Besides,” Sophie said, “switch-hitting isn’t going to tell you anything you don’t already know, if you’re truthful with yourself.”

  We all looked at her.

  “How would you know?” Charlotte asked.

  Sophie shrugged her shoulders. “Because I tried it.”

  “When was this?” Charlotte asked.

  “In high school. After what Todd did to me, I was so turned off to the whole idea of a guy touching me, that I thought a girl would be better, or that I’d be more comfortable with it.”

  “And it wasn’t?” Kelly asked, her tone gentle.

  “No. I mean, I was less nervous with a girl, but it never did anything for me. I was straight, but emotionally scarred, and didn’t know how to handle it. And, at that point, still didn’t want anyone to know what had happened to me.”

  “Okay,” Charlotte said with an annoyed sigh. “All I attract are jerks. And my therapist finally has me to the point where I’m not accepting them, just because that’s all I can get. But that leaves me with no one.”

  “It’s okay to be with no one,” Kelly said. “Especially while you’re focusing on your education and mental well-being.”

  “It’s frustrating,” Charlotte muttered.

  “Because you’re impatient with getting to the next part of your life?” Kelly asked. I could see her rebuttal for a positive answer already brewing in her head.

  “No, because I’m horny.”

  Kelly’s whole demeanor shifted, having no immediate response for that.

  None of us had a ready response.

  “It’s true. I have a high sex-drive,” Charlotte said, just as Logan entered the kitchen. “You’d think I’d be able to attract a decent guy with it. Lord knows that’s all they want, anyway.”

  Logan looked like he wanted to say something to that, but wisely kept his mouth shut and decided he’d busy himself, surveying the area to see how close we were to dinner being ready.

  “You know, we can get you a good quality vibrator, to hold you off while you find a guy who isn’t a lowlife,” I said.

  “I had one,” Charlotte said.

  “What happened to it?” Sophie asked.

  “I wore it out. Time of death, one-thirty-two a.m., sixteen days ago.”

  Logan turned his head, willing himself not to laugh at Charlotte’s desperation.

  “We’ll get you another one,” I told her.

  “I have Amazon Prime,” Kelly offered. “We’ll find one and have it overnighted. By tomorrow night, it can have your mood all ironed out.”

  Logan left the room.

  Charlotte let out a pent-up sigh, “You’re a very good stepmother. You get extra points for not telling me I just need more therapy.”

  “Well, I do think you need more therapy, but not because you like sex.”

  “Then what for?”

  “To figure out why the good guys don’t interest you.”

  “But I want a good guy.”

  “But when a good guy flirts with you, you don’t respond. When a good guy asks you out, you don’t accept.”

  “But none of the ones who’ve shown an interest are ones that I could see a future with.”

  “And you could see a future with the lowlifes you’ve dated?” Sophie asked.

  “Well, no. But they were just to have some fun with,” Charlotte answered.

  “Then why keep some of them around?”

  “Because I want a future!”

  “Then accept some dates from the good ones.”

  “But I’m not…”

  “You’re not, what?” I asked.

  “I’m not…”

  Sophie stepped closer to Charlotte, “But, you are.”

  Charlotte shook her head rapidly from side to side, blinking back tears. “No… I’m not.”

  “Yes, you are,” Sophie, the youngest one in the room, knowingly embraced our sister in a firm hug. “You are so worth it,” she whispered in Charlotte’s ear.

  Charlotte broke down.

  We all sat around the dining room table, things a little subdued after Charlotte’s breakdown in the kitchen.

  There’d been times when I was jealous of the twins. Connor and Chloe were in their own little world that none of us could really relate to, because everything had happened when they were so young, and they were then adopted right into their new family. They’d never felt the need to look back, and quite frankly, I think they resent me a little, for reminding them that they even have another family.

  They’d had it the easiest.

  I’d lumped myself in with the other two. Charlotte and Sophie would talk to me. And despite having been placed in a home with a friend, and eventually adopted by the same family I’d been placed with, I’d always been able to bond with both of them.

  Of course, I was the one doing everything I could to keep the interactions going. I was the one Dad trusted enough to have regular contact with. I was the one that all the information went through. And, I’d been the one to get jerked around between Dad and the system the most. There had been times when I’d resented being the only one who seemed to care enough to put themselves in that communicative position.

  But today was not one of those days. I had never been placed in a group home, nor a private home with an abusive person singling me out in their midst. For all intents and purposes, I had been blessed. So blessed, that I couldn’t pinpoint Charlotte’s issue. But, Sophie, who’d been through just as much hell as Charlotte had, zeroed right in on it. They were lucky to have each other, to be living here now, with the one sister that could understand where they were each coming from.

  It did make me a little jealous though. Connor had Chloe, and Charlotte had Sophie. I was the one sibling left out. I’d always been the one sibling left out of having another half to lean on, being so much older than any of the others. And while the older we got, the less those years mattered, but back then they may as well have been eons.

  That’s why I’d been so close to Dad. He’d always made sure to pour loads of attention on me, to counter-balance the closeness the others had. When I’d been separated from him, I’d been heartbroken. It’s why I was always so willing to let him back into my life, so I could have that connection again.

  Sadie was great, she’s my best friend. And her parents are amazing. But they’d had no way to understand where I was coming from. They’d only ever known their own lives that always seemed so much more picture-perfect than mine. They’d done their best to help me along the way. And Sandy had been excellent in talking and relating to me, her conversations with me had kept me out of therapy, because she just knew how to get me to see the good that has come from the bad.

  There were still facets of my life I kept private from them. They still know nothing of my father’s visitations, or how I kept him in the loop of what was going on with everyone else.


  And let me face some facts, here. After listening to Charlotte and Sophie, and watching how it is they’ve been trying to recover since getting out of the system, I became fully aware that my own part of the trauma is why I attached myself to Logan so hard and fast when he came into town.

  We were fourteen, and it was his first day at a new school. He looked just as lost and alone as I felt, I zeroed in on him, made friends, and we’ve been together ever since. He’s the only person on this planet that understands both sides of my convoluted family. He’s the only one that ever knew my Dad and I had contact after Dad’s release. I could trust him with anything. He became the other half of me, that I’d been looking for. And I was fully aware of how very fortunate I was to have him in my life.

  Which brings us back to the reason we were all here, to celebrate another union. “Sophie,” I said, turning to look at her, “should we give them their present before or after the cheesecake?”

  Dad’s head came up, “Present?” He forked the last two bites of his dinner into his mouth, chewed quickly and swallowed. “Before, definitely before.”

  We all shared looks and smiled, grateful he’d broken the somber tone of the meal.

  “After,” Kelly said, “it’ll give us the chance to enjoy the anticipation.”

  His face fell and he turned to her, hamming it up for our benefit. “But if we get it now, we can spend dessert being grateful for their thoughtfulness.”

  “We can be grateful for the wonderful dinner and dessert, while enjoying the anticipation.”

  “But I’d rather be extra grateful for all three. That’s one thing to be grateful for each of the three years we’ve been married.”

  We all started chuckling and laughing at his coaxing.

  “Fine,” Kelly said, giving in as we all knew she would.

  Dad clapped his hands together and began rubbing them in anticipation. “If the three of you all picked it out for us, and didn’t kill each other, then this has got to be amazing.”

  Zach let out a loud rumble of laughter.

  Dad caught his eye. “My reaction may seem silly to you, but I’ve put these girls through a lot. And this is the first time a number of my children have ever gotten together to get something for me. They gathered and discussed options of things I would like, and then they considered what their stepmother would like. This took thought and effort, and I’m going to relish in this moment.”

  Zach’s laughter had subsided as soon as Dad had begun to speak. He tucked his lips together and nodded, considering Dad’s words. “Going by what Sophie has shared with me, I think you’ve all been through a lot. And I think they’re all lucky to have you now.”

  Logan leaned back and extended his arm behind me, nodding at Zach.

  Zach smiled and reached behind Sophie, giving him knuckles.

  “Definite points scored with that,” Logan teased.

  “Thanks, man, I’m trying.”

  Sophie rolled her eyes at me, and a grin spread across my face.

  “All right,” Dad said, drawing our attention. “Gimme.”

  Sophie and I looked to Charlotte.

  Charlotte pulled out her phone and tapped a bit on her screen.

  Dad and Kelly’s phones both dinged with notifications.

  “I just forwarded all the documents to both of you,” Charlotte said.

  Dad lifted an eyebrow. “Documents, huh?” He lifted his phone up and started looking.

  Kelly was already thumbing through pages. “An Alaskan cruise, seriously?” she asked, the excitement evident in her voice.

  “Yeah,” Sophie said, her smile coming through in her tone. “There’s a balance on your account, so you two can pick your own excursions.”

  “This is incredibly generous…” Dad started. “But I don’t think we can accept—”

  “Well,” I started, drawing his attention, “you and Kelly never really had a honeymoon.”

  “Or even a real vacation,” Sophie said.

  “Girls—”

  “Dad,” I said, “it’s okay. You can go.”

  He pinned me with his eyes.

  I lifted my phone and pasted a note, I’d written earlier and put on my clipboard, into a text and sent it to him. I head-nodded to his phone when it dinged again.

  He looked dubious and looked down at the text.

  ‘I made sure that the trip doesn’t involve you leaving the country, and the time has already been approved by your parole officer. Because you’ve spent the last fifteen years being such a good boy, you’re all set.’

  He looked up, his gaze meeting mine. ‘Thank you,’ he mouthed.

  I grinned and nodded.

  He looked back down at the documents, “Wait, we leave the day after tomorrow? We can’t leave without more notice, we’re running a business, here.”

  “Max is all set to run things, starting tomorrow. You guys can spend the day packing, picking up whatever you might need to buy, like travel-sized toiletries, and thinking about which excursions you two might like to go on,” Charlotte said.

  Kelly started squealing.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  I Didn’t Go Anywhere Near That Damned Closet!

  “Hey,” Max said when I answered the phone.

  “Hey, yourself. What’s up?”

  “I know you’re at work, but is there any way you can get away and come over to the house?”

  I scanned the list of emails on my screen, mentally tallying all the ‘paperwork’ attached to them and let out a sigh. “I’d love an excuse to get out of the office. What’s going on?”

  “The ceiling in the kitchen was leaking when your sisters came downstairs this morning. They needed to head out for waitressing shifts, so I said I’d take care of it.”

  “Okay.”

  “It’s coming from the master bathroom toilet. The tank is literally cracked and the water is leaking out, which is triggering it to refill the tank, so water just continuously comes out. There was no valve to turn it off, so I had to shut the water off to the whole house.”

  “Ugh.”

  “Exactly. I’ve got a plumber on the way, but we just had a customer call in an uproar over something, and now I have to deal with that. And none of the other guys feel comfortable going up there, because it’s Roger and Kelly’s inner sanctum, or some shit like that. But I don’t like the idea of leaving a stranger up there alone, either.”

  “Right, fine. I’m on my way.”

  “Thank you. Plumber should be here in twenty.”

  “I’ll be there in fifteen.”

  I hung up my phone, grabbed my purse, and headed out.

  “Where are you going?” Dale asked, looking up from his computer as I sped past.

  “Plumbing emergency.”

  He grimaced. “Hope it’s not too expensive.”

  I nodded my thanks and went out to my car.

  “Yeah,” the plumber said, “this is fairly straightforward, except for one little complication.”

  “What’s that?” I asked, a hip propped against the counter, my badge on full display.

  “You need the tank replaced, but this model of toilet is no longer made, so either I get a tank as close as I can to it, and hope it doesn’t mess with the stylistic flow of the whole toilet—”

  I lifted an eyebrow.

  He caught the look on my face and smiled. “Or I replace the whole toilet with a new model. But then you have to pick which new toilet you want.”

  “Does it really make much of a difference?”

  “To some people, it seems life or death. To others, it’s whatever is cheapest. To others, they want to upgrade the technology.”

  “My dad is into technology…”

  “But then I have to go into the walls and run electricity over here.”

  I scrunched my face.

  “Can you call your Dad?”

  I shook my head. “He’s on a cruise ship on the Pacific Ocean today.”

  “Is he married?”

>   “Yeah.”

  He sighed and started flipping through pages on his phone. “Here, this one,” he said, holding up his phone to me. “I think this is as close to the same as you’re going to get. Fairly inexpensive, too.”

  “That does look close,” I said.

  “In my experience, unless you’re looking to redo the entire bathroom, it’s best to just stick to the existing design, whenever a woman’s opinion is involved. Otherwise, the new style looks odd to them and they start inspecting everything in the room, and thousands of dollars start going out the window as she redecorates the whole thing.”

  “But you do recommend replacing the whole toilet.”

  “It’s my preference. It eliminates any unforeseen issues both in getting the tank to connect to the base, and the possible eyesore of differences in the shades of white.”

  “All right, let’s go with that.”

  He nodded. “They’re in stock, I’m gonna go pick it up. The stuff to patch the ceiling where it leaked won’t take much in the way of supplies, either. I should be back in less than an hour.”

  “Sounds good.”

  “Um,” he said, tapping on his phone screen, “who should I email the estimate to?”

  “The same guy you talked to this morning.”

  “He’s going to pay for the repair? He made it sound like he was an employee.”

  I nodded. “The business is run from office space in the basement. He has access to a slush fund. He can write you a check from there. Dad can square up the account when he gets back.”

  “So, you’re going to pay me with a business check, for a residential repair?”

  I raised an eyebrow. “If you want paid today, yeah.”

  He sighed. “The billing lady is gonna love that.”

  I grinned. “At least it’s a problem you can pass off to someone else.”

  He let out a single chuckle as he finished sending off the document, “Yeah, true. I’ll be back. I can see myself out.”

  “Sounds good. See you then.”

  He left the master suite and I went back into the bathroom and gathered all the wet towels Max had laid around to soak up the water. I was walking out, trying to juggle the load in my arms so I could see around the top, and stubbed my toe. “Ow!”