The Brat and the Brainiac

  “Listen, do you think she loves me? I know she says she does, but maybe she’s saying it because I said it.”

  “Does she love you? She’s over there working a shitty little mall job and learning to clean toilets for you.”

  “She is? She’s still working there? I thought for sure she’d quit as soon as she got home.”

  “Nope. She’s still doing it. And she’s so stinking proud of herself, it makes me proud, too.”

  I nod, and then laugh, because a woman like her has no business having to do housework or work at the mall.

  “What about her classes?”

  “She says she’s still going. She’d better go, if she knows what’s good for her.”

  I pick up my drink and take a slug off it, then I set it down and rest my head on my hand.

  “Damn, I’ve got jet lag,” I tell him.

  “Could just be that broken heart you’re nursing.”

  My gaze meets his and I can’t help but grin.

  “Yeah. I guess.”

  He sits back in his chair.

  “Look, Jason, you should take it easy. After all, we’ve got eight more days on the road. Give it a little time. She might do something else to surprise you.”

  “Besides capturing a dirt-bag criminal?”

  “You never know what that kid’s going to get into. Thank God she didn’t go over there alone. I need to teach her how to fight.”

  I don’t say anything, because I can’t imagine a girl her size fighting anybody.

  “Well,” he says, killing his drink. “We’ve got a really early game tomorrow, so I’m going back to the hotel.”

  “Yeah,” I say, finishing my drink, too. “Let’s get out of here.”

  I’m starting to realize why Miranda kept her job. It’s a lot easier to work than it is to try to figure out a relationship, especially a broken one like ours. I spend a busy day at the game, and we’re done by about two. The bus takes us back to the hotel to pack for our next stop, Baltimore. We have three games there, and then a day off before we head off to Texas. We’ll get home in time to play New York and Seattle, and then another road trip, but this one only for four days.

  Baltimore’s nice with early summer weather. I wish I had someone to buy a present for, because that was a lot of fun picking things out and bringing them home. It seems like everybody else on the team comes back to the hotel each night with handled shopping bags from designer stores. I go out walking and window-shopping, but that just depresses me, especially when I run across a bridal salon.

  Miranda will have to pick her dress very carefully if she wants to hide her scar. I imagine her in her gown, how pretty she’ll look. I wish she were standing right here next to me.

  I turn around and head back to the hotel. I’m sharing a room with Brad Chandler again, and when I get there, he’s kicking back on his bed watching the news. He sits up when I enter and shuts off the TV as I flop down on my own bed.

  “Do you want to Skype with Miranda? I’ll get out if here if you do.”

  I glance over at him and shake my head.

  “No. Unfortunately, we’re on the outs.”

  He doesn’t even try to hide his surprise. He leans forward and pats me on the knee in a fatherly manner.

  “No kidding? That’s too bad. You kids seemed like you had a nice thing going.”

  “Yeah, but she’s kind of spoiled and immature, and I just don’t know if I’m up to it.”

  He nods.

  “Yeah. She’s pretty young, but she has a good heart, Jason, and that counts for a lot. Hell, if my son wasn’t gay, I’d fix him up with her.” When I just sit there looking miserable, he pats my knee again. “Come on, kid. Let’s go down and have a beer.”

  “All right,” I tell him, anxious to shut off my brain and stop thinking about Miranda for thirty seconds. “Let’s do that.”

  When we get down to the bar, Tommy’s there, sitting backwards in a chair and keeping a crowd of about ten guys entertained. He has a real knack for being amusing, and when he sees me, he turns his ball cap around and addresses me.

  “Hey, Jason,” he says. “You’ll never believe what that girl of mine’s done now.”

  “No? What’s that?”

  “She just won over eighteen hundred dollars at the Indian casino. She put forty bucks in the damned thing and won on the first spin.”

  I don’t want to seem bitter, so I grin. “Talk about luck,” I tell him.

  “She’s always had good luck like that.”

  He turns back to his group, and Brad and I go sit down nearby, near enough to be friendly, but far enough to have some privacy. Brad orders a pitcher of beer and turns to me.

  “You all right?”

  “Maybe I should look for a new job,” I tell him. “Otherwise I’ll have to hear about her for the rest of my life.”

  “Don’t quit your job for that, son. You’ll get over her, trust me.”

  “How do you get over a girl like her?”

  “I don’t know. It just happens. At least she didn’t run off with your teammate like my first wife did.”

  He tells me the story in a funny, non-self-pitying way, and it does take my mind off Miranda. By the time we head up to our room, I’m feeling like my old self again. I feel like calling her up and congratulating her, but that might send mixed signals.

  Tomorrow, at long last, is our day off. I need it to think about Miranda, but it’s hard to think with people around all the time. I want to be home in my own condo so I can sit down and really consider the pros and cons of staying with her or breaking up with her for good. I have a good idea and decide to go to the big library downtown with a notebook and a pen.

  It’s a short walk from our hotel, and when I open the big double doors, I’m hit with a blast of cold air. Since it’s the middle of the day on a weekday, there are plenty of empty tables, although some are taken up by the homeless. I find an empty one in a far corner and sit down to make my notes.

  I sit there with my notebook open for a long time before I can even think of anything to write, but finally, I get going.

  Too young, I write. Still in college. Too rich. Immature and spoiled. Too...

  I can’t think of any more cons for the time being, so I work on the pros.

  Kind. Pretty. Outgoing. Doesn’t mind that I’m not rich. Honest. Hard-working. Good sense of humor. Sweet. Adorable. Willing to work with me.

  She’ll probably quit her job now that she’s won a bunch of money. I wish I could talk to her and find out. I wish I could talk to her without giving her false hope. I wish I could just call her and congratulate her, if nothing else, but I know I can’t. I know it’s not fair, that it’s selfish to yank her chain if I have no serious intentions towards her.

  I go back to the cons. Too emotional, I write, and then I sit there, trying to remember anything else she’s ever done to irritate me, any other character flaws. Maybe I don’t know her as well as I thought I did, but I can’t think of one damn thing, so I switch over to the pros column again.

  Brave. Fearless. Fair-minded. Heart like a lion.

  I can’t believe she caught a crook, and she wasn’t even freaked out about it. I can’t believe she sat there and won a jackpot. We have three more games to play before we get home, and I wonder what else she’ll find to get into in those three days. No wonder Tommy has Ignatius stay with her while he’s gone. No telling what she’d do if he left her alone.

  I rip the page out of the notebook, and then I fold it up and stick it in my pocket. I get up and leave the blank notebook there for anyone who wants it. I leave the library and wander aimlessly for a while, and then I walk down to the waterfront.

  I should live like Miranda. I should get myself into adventures, try new things. I’m passing a dock with a huge sailboat tied up to it, and I stop to admire it. This one’s spectacular. I’ve never been on a sailboat in my life. Hell, I’ve never even been out on the water. My dad just isn’t a boat guy. There’s a booth there, and
a guy behind a glass window selling tickets.

  “You want a ticket?” he asks, through the little hole in the glass.

  “Yeah,” I tell him. “Why not?”

  I pay for my ticket and go down the dock to get on the boat. There are two guys from the team, one named Haskell and another named Martinez, standing there with a couple of girls, and they’re all four drinking champagne. I go over and say hi, and they introduce me to their wives. One of them looks about as young as Miranda and I think, maybe I’m looking at this thing all wrong. Maybe Miranda’s age is a lousy thing to hold against her.

  I could take a page out of Tommy’s book and blister her butt when she acts up. It seemed to work all right the other time I did it, and it seems to work well for him. Maybe spanking her is a good way to settle her down when she gets too rambunctious.

  The deck hand casts off and we pull away from the dock. It doesn’t take long for the sails to fill. The boat lurches out to sea, a freshening breeze blowing over the deck. I should’ve brought a jacket, but I never dreamed the temperature could change so much just a few short miles from shore.

  I hang onto the rail and look out at the puffy white clouds. My heart soars. The water’s a wide swath of grey-blue looking east, but looking west, it’s an amazing shade of turquoise. The land recedes with every moment, and we stand there with our glasses of champagne, enjoying it.

  “Oh, my God, this is so pretty,” says Martinez’s wife, and I have to agree. I wish Miranda were here with me, because I know she’d enjoy it. I don’t even know if she’s ever been to Baltimore, much less been on a sailboat.

  “What do you say, coach?” asks Haskell. “Pretty nice, huh?”

  “Yeah. Makes you want to buy a boat, huh?”

  I sit with the guys and their wives for the whole trip, and I’m a little sad when it wraps up. I wonder what Miranda’s doing today; wonder if she’s managed to get herself into any more adventures.

  I love her. I do, but I’m not sure I can keep up with a girl like her. I’m afraid she’ll outpace me and I’ll end up turning sour. I glance back out to sea and try to see things from her view, but I don’t know what to think anymore.

  “More champagne, sir?”

  “Sure. Why not?”

  The next morning, we’re on the bus early. It’s a short flight from Baltimore to Texas, and I wish this trip would end. It’s hot as hell in Texas, like it always is, and I’m really looking forward to going home, even if I do have to face Miranda, but I’m tired and determined not to let her back into my heart until I’ve had a chance to talk to her.

  On the other hand, I don’t want to talk to her, don’t even want to see her at this point in time. I’m glad I won’t have to get my keys from her, but I wonder what Ignatius will have to say to me.

  I’m unpacking my bags when there’s a knock at the door. I cross the room and open it, and Tommy’s there grinning at me.

  “Hey, Jason,” he says. “Do you want to go for a walk with me? Bring your room key.”

  I glance at the clock beside the bed.

  “All right,” I tell him with a sigh, “but we don’t have much time.”

  We take the smooth, mirrored elevator down to the lobby, and once we get down there, we go around to the pool entrance and step outside. The sun is bright and the air smells like chlorine. People are already splashing around in the pool and we find a couple of empty chaise lounges and sit down to watch them.

  “What’d she do now?” I ask him. “Win the Lotto?”

  “Man, don’t be like that.”

  “Well, how do you want me to be? How do you people want me to be?”

  “I want you to be happy. I want everyone to be happy,” he says.

  “Would you please just tell me what I’m out here for?”

  “I wanted to ask you what’s going to happen when we get home.”

  “I don’t know yet.”

  He glances out at the pool. His eyes are the same color as the water, a crystal clear blue.

  “A guy in her class asked her out,” he tells me. “She asked me what she should do and I said you dumped her, it shouldn’t matter.”

  My guts clench up and our glances meet. I’m trying not to let on how stricken and jealous I feel. In eight short days, my life has gone from great to crap, and it’s all by my own hand. I did all this to myself, and now I feel as if I’m about to lose her forever.

  “It does matter, though, doesn’t it?” he asks.

  For a moment or two, all I do is nod. It’s all I can do, because I know if I try to speak, I’ll break down and cry, but I eventually pull myself together.

  “Who is this guy?”

  “I don’t know. Some clown in her Economics class.”

  “She hates Economics.”

  “I know. Just give her a call, Jason. Tell her you want to mend things between you, and you’ll settle it all when you get home. It’s only a couple more days.”

  “God, this place is hot,” I say, wiping the sweat off my brow. “I don’t know, Tommy. Maybe I should just let her go on that date.”

  “That’d be the total wrong thing to do,” he tells me. “Knowing her, she’ll take it as some big sign that you two weren’t meant to be.”

  “You’re right. Let me go back up to my room and talk to her.”

  I call her up, but my call goes straight to voicemail. I realize she’s probably in class right now, probably in the very class where the guy asked her out. I’m about to leave a message, but then I chicken out. I don’t even know what I’d tell her anyway. I hang up, but then I take heart and call her back right away.

  “Miranda, it’s me. I’d like to talk to you, if you get a chance, but there’s a game at four-ten your time, so I’ll be working most of the day. Try to call me later this evening. I want to tell you about a boat ride I went on yesterday and...I’d like to ask you not to go out with anybody else until I get home and we talk things over. Please? I love you, baby.”

  I hang up then. The ball’s in her court, and it’s up to her whether we get back together or not. I hope she’ll choose me, but I don’t have any more time to think about it right now, because we have to meet the bus in ten minutes. I grab my bag, and then I go back downstairs with Brad.

  “You look like shit, son. You’d better forget about that girl for the time being and get your head in the game.”

  “I will.”

  The game goes well until the eighth inning, when one of our guys gives up a three-run homer. We work hard and get a run back, but ultimately, we lose by two. It’s quiet on the bus back to the hotel and I don’t think the guys will be doing a lot of partying tonight.

  Finally, about ten-thirty, my phone rings.

  “Miranda?”

  “Yes.”

  I drop down on my bed, suddenly choked up.

  “Thanks for calling,” I say at last.

  “You’re welcome. You went on a boat ride yesterday?”

  “Yeah. It was amazing. Have you ever been on a sailboat before?”

  “Of course.”

  “Then you already know.”

  “I’ve never been to Baltimore before. How is it there?”

  We talk about it for a while, and then I ask her about the guy who asked her out.

  “Oh, Uncle Tommy told you about that, did he?”

  “Yeah. You’re not really going to go, are you?”

  She’s quiet for a moment.

  “We already met for coffee, Jason.”

  I’m speechless. My chest feels tight and my fists curl. If he was standing here in front of me, I know I’d punch him in the face.

  “Who is this son of a bitch, anyway?”

  “Calm down. He’s just a guy from class.”

  “You like him, don’t you?”

  She clicks her tongue, sounding annoyed.

  “He’s all right,” she tells me. “Why?”

  “Because I don’t want you seeing him again.”

  “You are out of your mind,” she tells me.
“First you dump me, then you tell me you can’t even get your keys from me because you can’t bear to see me. And now you’re telling me not to see a perfectly nice guy? Get the keys from Ignatius like you told me and leave me alone. You have no right to tell me who I can go out with.”

  “Miranda, please. I made a mistake.”

  “You bet you did. You never should’ve dumped me, Jason Weed. And the worst part is, you couldn’t even tell me to my face. You told Uncle Tommy and let him tell me.”

  I hear the way her voice breaks, and I know she’s got that sorrowful expression on her face she gets when things feel hopeless.

  “I know I should’ve told you myself,” I say. “I’m an idiot. Please, Miranda, let’s not argue about this over the phone. All it’s doing is making it worse.”

  “How can it get any worse? How could you dump me over one little mistake like that?”

  “All I can say is, I’m sorry, Miranda, and beg you to reconsider. Please take me back. I’ll make it all up to you, I swear. Just give me another chance.”

  “Oh, like the one you gave me?”

  “Let’s not get upset here, all right? We’ve got two more days on the road, and then I’ll come home and we can discuss this calmly, okay?”

  “I guess so.”

  “I...I miss you, Nanda.”

  She lets out a strangled sob and hangs up the phone, and I think, at least she didn’t tell me to go screw myself this time.

  Miranda

  I wipe my eyes on the back of my hand. I must be the dumbest girl alive. All I want is Jason back, and I blew it once again. He probably thinks I’m a total harpy. I wonder if he’ll still come over to talk to me when they get back. Two more days is going to seem like two more years.

  I have to get my mind off it, so I go find Ignatius.

  “What’s wrong with you?” he asks me.

  “I just got off the phone with Jason.”

  “Did you make up?”

  “No. I yelled at him for breaking up with me in the first place.”

  He shakes his head and says, “Miranda, you’re a priest who burns his own cassock.”

  “I don’t know what that means,” I tell him.

  “It means you cut off your nose to spite your face.”