16. God begins dealing with Julie about her words and with Rick about his tendency of disengaging to avoid conflict and not leading his family. The school fire prompts both of them to not only stop bad behavior, but begin new positive behaviors. Julie begins by apologizing to Rachel and Ben. Do you think Rick owes his children apologies, as well? Why, or why not? Think of a time you reacted poorly to something your mate did or didn’t do. Why did you react? Discuss what you could have done differently to defuse the situation.
17. What did Julie need to discover about God and feeling close to Him? Why did that truth make a difference in how Julie saw herself? Her ability to sing? Her children? When Rick finds Julie at the piano, he becomes uncomfortable. Discuss how watching one’s mate change in a good way, can sometimes make us uncomfortable. In what ways does Rick feel he needs to change? If only Julie changed, do you think their marriage would benefit as much as if Rick changes, too? Why, or why not?
18. Angelina’s presence highlights the communication issues between Rick and Julie. Why does her presence make changing their conflict pattern more difficult? Think of a time, past or present, when an outside influence exacerbated a problem between you and your mate. Was Julie’s concern over Angelina warranted? What should Rick do long-term with regard to Angelina, now that he knows she is attracted to him? Do you think Julie and Angelina can be friends? Why, or why not?
19. Julie repairing her relationship with Rachel is key to Julie’s spiritual journey. Why do you think this is? What does it say about Julie that she becomes her daughter’s voice coach? How do you think this will affect Julie and Rick’s relationship? Discuss how family relationships are intertwined, and how tension in one often bleeds over into others. Could Rick and Julie’s marriage thrive if they didn’t work to repair the damage to their children?
* If you or someone you love wants information or instruction about handling conflict in marriage, please visit my website, www.shelliearnold.com Check out the YOUR MARRIAGE resources seminars The Heart of Communication and Break the Conflict Cycle and Intimacy Barriers.
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Sticks and Stones (The Barn Church Series) Page 30