by K A Sands
Please, let this be a dream I wake up from any minute now.
The joke was on me though, right? Because I knew all too well it was no dream. It was my worst nightmare come true.
“Sir, sir.” I heard from my side. Turning to the voice, I saw the kindest eyes peering back at me. “Let me look at her, sir. We’re here to help, but we need to look at her. What’s her name?”
I looked down at my battered and bleeding sister and whispered; “Sophie, it’s Sophie. Please, help her,” I begged. I begged with all I was that this man could do what I couldn’t seem to and bring her back to me.
“You need to let go so that we can take a look.”
What if I could never hold her like this again? What if she never opened her eyes again? I reluctantly let go and the next thing I knew Chrissie had a hold of me and was pulling me off to the side as the paramedics surrounded my sister. She didn’t relent, her hands pulling me further from her.
“Shaun,” she said. “Let’s move out the way, huh? Let them do what they need to do, okay?” I caught her eyes, seeing sorrow laced heavily in them.
“What the fuck happened?” I hissed, disbelief gripping my insides, fear crawling through my veins like molten lava through the cracks of the earth. Anger stirred along those fault lines too.
She shook her head. “I don’t know, I don’t know. This is what I walked into. Next door called me, they couldn’t get through to you. I don’t know, Shaun.” She was visibly shaken, her hands trembling as she held onto me.
I watched as they bagged and tubed Sophie, I’d seen it before with my brother, so I knew what they were doing. They placed something around her stomach and I doubled over in pain, letting out a strangled cry at the thought of losing everything. Starting to reach for her again, Chrissie held me back, embracing me.
There were hushed tones around the room and I sensed the urgency of the paramedic’s actions. Among the chaos I heard the whoop and thud of a heartbeat, a heartbeat that commanded a hush around the room. Everyone quieted, and I instantly recognised it, letting out a sigh of breath, the sound was like music to my ears even though the beats were slow. I closed my eyes again, Chrissie’s arms tightening, it was a small comfort I took for I knew this was just the beginning.
As much as it hurt me I couldn’t think about Ayden right then. It was all about Sophie. I knew his father was right there with him and I had to trust in that. I looked over and noticed they hadn’t moved him, he was still face down, lying in the same position he was before. There was a blanket over his legs and lower back, tinged the same garish red as Sophie’s towel.
I searched for Lucca and found him off to the side of the room, hunched down, his head in his hands. Defeated, the man was utterly defeated, much the same way I was.
There was another huddle of people across the room I hadn’t noticed earlier. Peering closer, my eyes connected with the blank stare of Jake’s between the boots of the people surrounding him. His tongue lolled from his mouth, but his piercing stare never waned from mine. It was dead, and cold...and accusing. I turned from the sight sharply, the stark confrontation of death and guilt too raw to comprehend.
Christ, I couldn’t take this in, it was all too much. Too fucking much!
Chrissie nudged me for attention and I saw they had Sophie on the stretcher and were making moves to take her out. I needed to be with her, I couldn’t leave her. I nodded and shakily rose to my feet, leaning in and quietly speaking into Chrissie’s ear. “I want who did this,” I said to her through gritted teeth. She nodded in understanding as I stalked out the room following behind Sophie. Ayden had to wait.
Pain crippled me, and I almost fell down the stairs when a hand grabbed out to hold me, steady me.
Lucca gripped my bicep, “We’re right behind you, okay?”
“Ayden?”
“We can’t move him for a minute, but he was conscious when we got here.” There was no reassurance in his voice, so I just turned on my feet and left. What more could I do? I had to concentrate on Sophie.
Ayden
I could hear my dad saying something in my ear, but the words were all jumbled and fuzzy, his voice comforting enough among the pain however. My head was pounding and there was an excruciating heat burning at my back I couldn’t make out. Opening my eyes briefly, needing to see him, just so I knew he was really there, dizziness washed over me, and that feat became impossible as my lids fell shut with heaviness.
“Don’t move, son.” I heard him, at least I thought I did. The loud roar in my ears threatened to drown me so I concentrated on breathing. It hurt like a bitch, but I had to try - I began to count the numbers in my head.
One.... two.... three....
My father’s hand stroked my temple, soothing me. I’d know that touch anywhere, a touch always given with love, never anger.
Four.... five.... six....
“Open your eyes for one second, buddy, just so I know.”
I felt like I couldn’t, but I also heard the panic in his voice and I really, really hated hearing the sound, it made me feel guilty. He was saving someone again; me. It took the greatest of efforts, but I pried my eyes open slowly and he was there, in front of my face. A ragged sigh escaped my mouth. He was right there looking at me with all the love in the world. I tried to take strength from the vision, but it was becoming more and more difficult to do anything. I groaned in pain when he leaned down and kissed my forehead.
“Good boy.” He shuffled a bit and I couldn’t hold my eyelids open any longer as another wave of pain assaulted me; a long, loud, guttural moan heaved from my body.
Fuck, everything hurt...
“Sssshhh....” he lulled, stroking his finger down my cheek. “They’re gonna put you to sleep, buddy, but I’m right here. I’m not leaving, okay?” I couldn’t muster the strength to reply, just gave in to the blackness that started shifting and eddying around me.
Shaun
A nurse in scrubs directed me to a family room where I paced while she talked. “Is there anyone we can call, sir?” I shook my head; I was all Sophie had left, who would I call? “What about the baby’s father?” Another pathetic shake of my head.
“Okay, sir, that’s fine. I’m going to go and get an update and come right back to you. If you need anything, push this button.” She pointed to an orange switch on the wall by the door. “And someone will come, okay? I’ll be as quick as I can.” She gave me a sad smile before leaving me alone in the room.
No sooner had the door shut, it swung open again and Lucca was stalking toward me. He grabbed me and held me in a tight embrace I didn’t even realise I needed until his arms came around me.
“How you doing, son?”
Fuck, that word. Even after everything, he still paid mind to use it. That one singular word hit me square in the chest and had me collapsing to my knees, crumpling on the floor in Lucca’s arms crying, with no intention of stopping. He kept holding on. Not saying a word yet saying enough.
“I said I was your uncle.” I nodded because honestly, I didn’t trust my own voice right then. “It means they can give me information about Sophie too in case you’re not up to it, all right?” I was thankful for the man’s foresight. “She’s really hurt; you know that right, Shaun?” He looked me over, but I couldn’t return it and continued staring at the floor. “She has a major wound to her shoulder. Chrissie did great, but she still lost a lot of blood, they’re transfusing. She also has wounds to her lower body but, Shaun...” he paused, “...they are focusing on stabilising her and keeping the baby safe right now.” I did look at him then and saw the tears pooling in his eyes his love for my sister evident.
“Did they....” I couldn’t ask the question.
Lucca closed his eyes and pinched at the bridge of his nose, a tear trickling down to his chin. He didn’t need to answer, I knew already. Numbness folded over me and took me into its cold depths, ice creeping into my heart.
“Ayden?” I choked out, almost inaudibly.
Lucca sighed deeply and grasped my hand as if now to take strength from me. I took comfort in the gesture and tried to be what he needed as I squeezed tight. It looked like we both needed each other the same way. I wasn’t alone, I wasn’t on my own. We’d get through this together for them.
“Blunt force trauma to the back of his head. Really doesn’t look good. Puncture wound to the middle of his back, not looking good either.” I sucked in a harsh breath and tried to take hold of my emotions. “Whoever did this, does not have very much longer to walk this earth, I can promise you that.” Oh yeah, the man was talking my language now.
But first, we had to deal with Sophie and Ayden.
There was a knock on the door before Chrissie and Ryder entered. Subdued hugs were given all round and I suddenly realised I could very much handle this. We had people who cared about us. It would not do Sophie any good if I was a snivelling mess. She’d kick my arse, so would Ayden. It was time to man up and be what they needed, time to stiffen the spine.
Be their strength....
“Any news?” Chrissie asked quietly. I shook my head no, hoping that no news was good news. “I didn’t know what to do, Gripp. I got there and there was blood everywhere. I just went for Sophie....” Trailing off, she was clearly upset she didn’t do more, at having to make a choice.
“Any feelers out yet?” I asked, ignoring all else.
“Yeah,” she rubbed at the end of her nose, “I called a friend, someone I trust. I didn’t want to ask anyone else. It screamed of someone that knows Sophie.”
I hadn’t thought of that, and I was thankful for Chrissie having her thinking cap on for once; she was functioning marginally better than me. But there was a time and a place for this and here wasn’t it. She needed to leave. As thankful as I was she’d gotten to Sophie so quickly, I was still enraged at her betrayal and the more I calmed, the harder it was to look at her and not feel angry. I asked her to leave quietly and from the look on her face she understood the reasoning, didn’t protest.
It was four hours of me feeling like a useless prick and imagining every worst-case scenario I could think of before someone with more status than a nurse finally came in to give us any information. The doctor looked tired and a little bit grim, I hoped his face was no reflection on the news he was about to deliver but stole myself for the worst anyway.
“Okay...” he started, “are we all staying for both patients? Sophie and Ayden?” He looked around the room at everyone. Laura had arrived with her dad not too long before. We all agreed, needing to hear about both our loved ones together.
“Firstly, Sophie then.” He swung his attention my way. “We stopped the bleeding from a single stab wound to her upper right chest. She had significant blood loss but was successfully transfused taking a pint of blood. There is damage to the rotator cuff, which as you know takes a long time to heal, even without surgery. The possibility of nerve damage to her hand, especially her fingers, is high, but it’s too early to say.” He stopped to let that sink in.
He smiled softly at me before continuing. “Baby appears to be okay for now, heartbeat a little low but she’s hanging on in there. We’ll keep a constant monitor on her. Sophie’s tough and I do believe that strength is helping her unborn child. Sophie herself is going to need some aftercare, perhaps therapy, when she’s up for it.”
“When can I see her?”
“Well, we have her on a mild sedative and pain medication so at the moment she is sleeping as comfortably as she can. The nurse is settling her into a private room at the request of Mr. Rinaldi.” I bowed my head in silent thanks to him, while Ayden’s father patted my leg.
“Can I call you Shaun?” The doctor asked as he crouched down in front of me. “Here’s the thing, Shaun. Physically your sister will recover, but that little baby isn’t quite out of the woods yet. I can’t have Sophie stressed any more than she already is. I’ll let you have five quiet minutes with her for now, okay?” He stressed the word quiet, so I understood him. That was fair enough; I just wanted to see her with my own eyes. I mouthed thank you and slouched back into my seat, patiently waiting for the next piece of news.
“We’ll get you up there in a sec.” He hoisted up and gave his attention to Lucca, who had also stood up. The doctor clasped his hand on Lucca’s shoulder, a show of comfort perhaps. “Ayden’s a little more complex as you know Lucca.” I watched as he braced his back stiffly and motioned to the doctor to go ahead. “The blunt force trauma to the back of the head has resulted in a fracture to his skull and a small brain bleed.” I sucked in yet another breath and watched as Lucca tensed further.
“Go on...” he encouraged.
“We concentrated on an IV for pain meds to make him as comfortable as possible first. The object lodged in his back has been removed successfully. It was close to the 4th vertebrae of his spine, and we can’t see any damage to that area other than the puncture wound. It’s not often these types of injuries do a lot of damage despite the severity of them.”
“Okay, we can deal with that, right?”
The doctor smiled confidently. “We need to put him into an induced coma for a day or two, so we can sort out the brain bleed, it’s not big but it needs to be dealt with sooner rather than later. By inducing a coma, it gives his body a better chance of healing.” Tears tracked down Lucca’s face as he hung his head, Ryder standing at his side, wrapped an arm around his shoulders. “I’ll take you up to ICU so you can see him. Talk to him, let him know what’s going on; let him know you’re there before we put him under. Hopefully we’ll have him right as rain before you know it.”
The room was deathly quiet, all absorbing the gravity of Ayden’s situation. The doctor looked around the room as if sizing us up. “Y’all need to keep yourselves rested and fed otherwise you’re no good to Sophie or Ayden. You can’t be here twenty-four seven, sleep when they do, okay.”
I knew this, it was going to be hard, but I agreed with him. He turned back to Lucca. “Mate, I’m sorry to see you under these circumstances. I can only say I’m sorry for your loss. Have you called his mother, Stella? Maybe you should....” It was fairly obvious these two knew each other personally, but the doctor didn’t continue on with what he was saying as Lucca glared at him.
“Just get Shaun up to see Sophie for now and we’ll organise what we need to. Thanks, James.” He stepped in to hug the man, before slipping away and pulling out his phone.
Ayden
The scratching in my throat worsened as I tried to shift my head to the side. Keeping my eyes shut, knowing if I opened them my reality would catch up with me. Without anyone saying, I knew instinctively where I was, what had happened. I remembered every detail in slow motion and the sour feeling left behind caught up on a hitch of breath as I had visions of Jake and the way he hadn’t moved the whole time I’d been held and made to watch the sorry scenario play out in front of me.
Jake would never brighten my day again, he’d never wrap his big arms around me another time.
My neck ached, and my brain thudded against my skull so hard it made the nausea worse. The sound of fabric swishing around me and quiet hushed voices brought me back to where I was. Something tugged at my mouth, the scratching intensifying and causing me to gag and wretch.
Still I kept my eyes closed, squeezed tight as if in denial of my surroundings, fighting against whoever was dragging me back to the present. Tears fell freely down my face when I thought about Sophie and the helpless look on her as she had lain looking at me. Panic edged around me, and it took all my strength to tamp it down. The hand at my head, stroking my hair from my face, aided in calming me down. My father’s hand. He’d made the same motion a million times or more. The comfort of my dad’s gentle fingers and his soft ‘sshh’s’ helped to relax the tenseness in my body.
Don’t stop...
“Sophie...” I sputtered out in a croaky whisper, but my dad was so close to me he heard without straining. His other hand clasped mine at the side of the bed and he squeezed.
A gentle reassurance.
“She’s safe. You’re both safe.” I heard the crack in his voice and while it was great to hear a familiar voice, I wanted to open my eyes, so I could see him. I needed to see him, see Sophie, Shaun...fuck, where was Shaun?
“He’ll be here soon. When you’re ready. He’s with Sophie for now.” Yes, the man could read my mind. Or maybe I’d uttered his name?
Exhaling loudly, my back screamed in pain as I did, the discomfort was excruciating. A coughing from beside me made me jump, not recognising who the sound belonged to.
“You need to open up your eyes, son,” my father coaxed gently, his fingers constantly swiping through my hair.
Squinting at first, inclining my head to where I thought my dad was, I attempted to open my eyes. The light of the room was harsh, and it hurt at first, but I adjusted quickly. It wasn’t too bad, someone had thankfully had the foresight to close the curtains, but I still cursed at how much it hurt. My whole body was in agony and for the second time in a matter of minutes the nausea almost overwhelmed me.
My father’s smiling face was the first thing I saw. He was hunched over the bed, gazing at me with a face full of concern. “Hi, baby boy.” If I could have rolled my eyes I would have. He leaned over and kissed the top of my head, another habit of his.
“Dad,” I croaked out, my throat not ready for more, my tongue like a ball of dry cotton wool in my mouth.
“Water?” he asked before turning to the man beside him. “He can have a sip of water, right?”
I presumed it was the doctor, his white coat and stethoscope wrapped around his neck a dead give-away. He answered with a cheery, “yes, of course.”
Casting my eyes around now I could see better, I noticed it was just us - no one else in the private room. The solitude helped, the thought of facing anyone, a hurdle I wasn’t ready to jump.