by Elin Peer
“Liv.” The sound of Charles’ voice outside the door made Conor cover my mouth and whisper in my ear. “Tell him to go away.”
I was scared for my life, and in desperation, I banged my head back against the cabinet, making as much noise as I possibly could.
“Liv, are you okay?” The door handle moved but the door was locked. “Open the door, Liv.”
When did he lock the door? It had to be when he pretended that he was about to leave.
Conor’s grip on my throat tightened even more making it hard to breath, so I couldn’t bang my head again, but I used my hands to make as much noise as possible.
CHAPTER 22
Deal Breaker
Charles
The banging sounds coming from inside the bathroom, and the fact that Liv didn’t answer me, made my protective instinct flare up.
I was pushing at the door handle, but it was locked. “Liv, open the fucking door.”
When she still didn’t answer, I knocked at it with my shoulder.
Taking a few steps back, I prepared to do it again, but then I heard footsteps and the door unlocked and swung open.
I stared at Conor, who stood with his pants unzipped, and then my eyes moved past him to Liv, who was red in the face and pulling her shorts back up.
“You… you…” I didn’t know who to get mad at first.
“Charles, we were in the middle of something. Maybe you can come back later.”
So that’s what the banging sounds had been; the two people I trusted most in this world, having sex behind my back.
Conor’s words made me see red. “You bastard. How dare you touch her?” I pointed a finger at her. “And you… I trusted you.”
Liv stared at me, her fingers to her throat where marks from his fingers were red against her creamy skin. Her fetish to be held around her throat was a detail she only told her lovers.
My tics went into beast mode and it felt like I was having a seizure with the way my body jerked. Why the fuck couldn’t I be like normal people. “How long has this been going on?”
Liv was heaving for air, unable to speak.
“Charles, there’s no need to get upset. Remember when I asked you if you’d share Liv with the rest of us? You gave your consent right away. Did you think I wouldn’t make a move on a beautiful woman like her?” Conor spoke to me in that tone he used when he was explaining something rather obvious to someone who was a bit slow. “Let me be clear. This doesn’t mean Liv likes you less. Love shouldn’t be limited in its expression, and it’s not like there’s less for you just because I dip in and take my share. I’m sure Liv can handle both of us.”
I took a step back. “No! Liv and I were exclusive. We made a promise to each other.”
Liv was coughing and then she tried to say a few words. “You told him…”
We both looked at her, waiting for her to finish her sentence.
“You told him about the throat thing.”
“No. Of course I didn’t tell him.” My eyes darted from her to him. If she hadn’t told him… then… “How did you know?”
Conor zipped his pants and looking into the mirror, he made himself look presentable again. “Call it intuition.”
“No. You said Charles told you.” Her voice sounded rusty and forced.
“He did.”
“Why would I tell you something that private?”
“Because you trust me. You’re just confused right now, but you sat in my office and told me that Liv got turned on from being strangled.”
“I didn’t!” Lifting my hands to my head I felt myself going over every conversation I’d had with him. Why couldn’t I remember that I told him?
“Well, then I must be a mind reader.” Conor tried to move past me, but I intersected him.
And then the obvious explanation came to me like a lightning bolt. “You fucking read my diary, didn’t you?” It was the only explanation, and suddenly his ability to read my thoughts made sense.
“Charles, you’re being very dramatic right now.”
“I don’t care. What you just did is a deal breaker. Not only did you violate my privacy by reading my diary, but you’re spinning my words against me because we both know I never agreed to you having sex with my girlfriend.”
A small voice by the door, made me turn to look over my shoulder and see River standing behind me.
“Ciara sent me up to see what’s taking you all so long. Dinner is ready.”
“Tell Ciara that Liv and I won’t be eating dinner. We’re leaving.”
River paled. “You’re leaving? When are you coming back?”
“We’re not!” I gave Conor a cold stare. It was clear to me that whatever had happened between him and Liv didn’t mean she loved him. Liv hadn’t said much but she’d scowled at him a few times.
River ran to Liv and clasped her arms around her. “But we made a pact. You can’t leave me. Family for life, remember?”
It seemed dramatic, but I reminded myself that River was already suffering from the absence of her own mother.
“Liv?” I said her name like a question.
She was holding River in her arms and looked like someone had asked her if she wanted her right or left arm amputated.
“I’m not staying a single moment longer with this asshat.” I nodded my head to Conor. “I don’t know if we can save our relationship after your betrayal, but…” I trailed off, hoping that she would at least apologize.
Liv’s face was still red and she had tears in her eyes as she stood with her arms around River, who was clinging to her. “I’m staying.”
“You’re staying?” Her rejection felt like she’d impaled my heart with a fork only to take a knife and slice it into a million small pieces that could never be sewed back together.
I couldn’t stay to ask her why, or sit down to have a civilized and rational conversation about it. The two people I loved most in the world had betrayed me and by leaving, I’d leave behind the only real family I’d known.
Maybe I should stay and fight for her.
As fast as the thought came, I pushed it away. Staying would mean accepting sharing my girlfriend with someone I had trusted and thought of as the big brother that I never had. The trust in others that he’d helped me restore over these past few months had come crumbling down and I could already feel the bitter and vile taste of disappointment fill my mouth.
“There’s no need for you to leave, Charles. You have an entitlement issue that we need to work on, but once you accept that Liv is free to have other lovers, you’ll see that it’s for your best as well. I told you that you weren’t ready for a relationship and I was right. You are angry right now, but take some time to reflect about how you’re overdramatizing the situation and blowing it out of proportion. If you let this serve you as a learning experience, you can take a step upward and become a more grounded, less controlling and possessive partner to Liv.
“No.” Backing away, I took in the scene with Conor tilting his head to one side while Liv cried in the background with River in her arms. The woman I loved was choosing Conor over me, just like Sara had done when I first arrived. How could I have been so naïve to think that I’d ever be enough for her?
Slamming the door to my room, I called a taxi and tore all my clothes from my closet, filling my two suitcases in under five minutes. What I couldn’t fit, I left behind. Carrying them down to the entrance, I was met by Atlas, Lumi, and Maximum in the foyer.
Atlas tried to step in front of me. “Please don’t leave.”
“I have to.”
They were trailing after me as I walked outside to wait for the taxi.
“You don’t have to leave, Dad said so himself,” Maximum insisted.
“Was that before or after he fucked my girlfriend?” I regretted my harsh words immediately. It wasn’t their fault and I was directing my anger at the wrong people.
Lumi looked down while Atlas kicked some gravel. “Why did you bring her here when you know w
hat he’s like? You know he sleeps with every woman who comes here.”
“He hasn’t slept with Estelle or the twins,” I said in my defense.
Pushing his glasses up, Atlas rolled his eyes. “Yes he has. The twins gave in months ago and had a threesome with him.”
“How would you know?”
Atlas and Maximum exchanged a glance, and then the younger brother answered, “Because Dad’s room is right next to ours.”
“And Liv? Have you ever heard her in his room?”
They both shook their heads. “No. We would have heard it. The walls are thin.”
“And you’re sure, Liv was never with Conor in his room.”
“Yes!” Atlas confirmed.
Lumi touched my elbow. “Are you sure they were really together? I always got the feeling that Liv didn’t like Conor much.”
I lowered my brow. “Why would you say that?”
It was cold and the teenagers didn’t have any jackets on. Lumi folded her arms, making herself smaller. “It’s like she’s always fishing for dirt on him every time she’s alone with us, and her smile becomes fake around him.”
“No, Liv is just critical of people in general. She clearly likes Conor.”
“Then maybe I just misread the situation.” Lumi’s eyes were drawn to the taxi coming toward us.
“I hope you all know that my leaving so suddenly has nothing to do with you three.” I gave them each a hug.
Lumi teared up and Maximum was biting his lip with a pained expression.
I was already in the car and about to close the door when I looked back at the house one last time. Liv stood right outside the entrance, her eyes large and her body stiff. I waited a few seconds to see if she would run to me, but she only took a small step forward before she was stopped by Conor, who stepped up behind her and put a hand on her shoulder.
I squeezed the inside door handle of the car and suppressed the strong urge to run up to them and punch his face for touching her. There were tears on her face and even from this distance I could tell her lower lip was quivering, but she stood by her choice to stay and didn’t move off the spot.
With my heart left in pieces somewhere on the top floor of the Red Manor, and my pride stinging like this whole fucking cab was made of nettles, I told the driver, “Go!” My jaws were so tensed up that it was hard to speak.
Without a plan, I ended up checking into the hotel I’d first stayed at when I arrived in Dublin for a conference.
I tipped the bellboy when he brought my luggage up and handed me the key card.
Now what?
Letting myself fall on the bed, I looked up at the ceiling trying to piece everything together. No matter how much I tried, I couldn’t find a plausible reason for Liv and Conor to be half undressed unless something sexual had taken place between them. That meant she had betrayed me.
Unless…
The thought that he could have forced her entered my mind, but if that were the case, she wouldn’t have chosen to stay with him.
Arghhh… it was all so confusing and my head was exploding with questions like: could this be it? We had talked about a future with children and made love like we couldn’t get enough of each other. I wasn’t ready to let go or say goodbye to Liv, but I couldn’t share her either.
The need to understand made me pick up my phone and text her.
Charles: Was it all a lie?
Staring at my phone I hoped for an answer but she didn’t answer me.
Walking over to the window, I looked out over the lights of Dublin. It was early November and below me on the street, strangers were moving about like the world still made sense to them. Placing my hand on the floor to ceiling window of the suite, I wondered how long it would take someone to fall from here and if it would be an instant death.
A memory of Liv and me visiting the cliffs of Moher and discussing how many times you could say shit on your way down from the cliffs, came back to me. That day had been so perfect. For the first time in my life, I’d walked around holding hands with a woman I fancied.
My mood was as dark as this November night.
When my phone rang, I wanted it to be Liv so badly that I didn’t even check caller ID before I pressed it to my ear. “Liv, is that you?”
“Hello, Charles.” My grandfather’s voice made me stiffen. I hadn’t talked to him in almost three months and it had been on my mind to call him. Of all the times in the world, now was the worst time for him to call. I didn’t want to hear his ‘I told you so’ and I had no energy to argue.
“Where are you, Charles?”
My tone was flat. “In a hotel. The same as when I first arrived.”
“Oh, good.” He sounded relieved. “You had me worried there for a second. Liv told me you left after a dramatic incident and she was worried about you.”
I frowned. “Wait a minute. How the f…” I stopped myself before cursing. My grandfather had always looked down on vulgar speech. “How do you know Liv?”
“I’ll explain everything if you come home to see me.”
“No. Tell me right now.” I couldn’t stand still, so I paced the floor.
“All right.” He sighed. “But you have to promise me that you won’t hang up until I’m done explaining. Things aren’t as black or white as you think.”
“I’m listening.”
“I did my research and Conor O’Brien isn’t who he made you believe he is. His real name is Conor Bricks and he has a long list of criminal behavior from his past.”
“I know all of that, but it’s all lies.” I rubbed my forehead, annoyed with myself for defending the man who had seduced my girlfriend just to prove he could have her.
“Charles, you believe the best about people and he’s good at lying. He has perfected it over his entire life, but the man leaves a trail of misery in his path. We believe he killed the boy’s mother to gain her life insurance.”
“What boy? Are you talking about Nathan?”
“Yes. His mom was scared of Conor. That’s why she hid in England, but he found her and forced her to commit suicide.”
I closed my eyes and rubbed the spot between my eyebrows. “That’s absurd.”
“Yes, it is. But we’re dealing with a man without scruples.”
“Does this mean you were the one who hired those private detectives?”
“Yes.”
I snorted. “They were amateurs and came to make accusations with no proof to back it up.”
“They weren’t there to prove anything. They were there to put pressure on Conor. I would like for you to meet up with Kit tonight. She can answer a lot of your questions. I’m also happy to send over the report we’ve gathered about Conor Brick’s dark past and current deception of his cult members.”
“It’s not a cult. Don’t start with me again. I’ve already told you.”
“How much did you pay him?”
I rolled my eyes and sighed out loud. “Not much.”
“Are you saying that you didn’t pay at all?”
“No.”
“How much, Charles?”
I hesitated before giving him my answer. “Four hundred thousand.”
“Is that it?”
“Yeah, the truth is that I was going to transfer another one hundred and fifty thousand dollars, but that was a donation for his foundation. It would build three schools in Africa.”
“His foundation is a scam. Kit can tell you all about it. No more than ten percent is used for philanthropy. The rest is channeled into his own pocket.”
“But he doesn’t need the money. Conor is a millionaire himself.”
My grandfather scoffed again. “Only because he’s scammed rich people like you, Charles. It’s what he does.”
“No, he used to be a code breaker for the government. He’s a genius.”
“Charles, use your common sense. The man is a convicted criminal. I know you heard that straight from the Irish police, so stop defending him and ask yourself, how someone with
his criminal record would get a security clearance. Bricks might have wished he was a code breaker, but I assure you it’s just another lie.”
My chest felt heavy and I found it hard to breathe. How could I have been so blind?
“About Liv…”
“Yes?”
“She came to get you out.”
“What do you mean?”
He coughed. “I found your diary from that time at Harvard where you met her. It’s an old proven method that cults will lure people in by using attractive members to do the invitation. I believe that’s what happened to you too.”
I was going to protest, but Sara had flirted with me at the conference and made me think I had a chance with her before she invited me to join her mastermind group.
“I’m not sure. Maybe.”
“Well, I figured we could reverse the method and send someone to lure you out.”
“Are you saying that you paid Liv to be with me?” It felt like an iron band was squeezing my lungs making it hard for me to breathe. “Was she just acting?”
He sighed again. “Here’s where it gets tricky. You see, when I told her about you being wrapped up in a cult, Liv was eager to go and help. I offered her money but she didn’t want it. I think she was genuinely happy to connect with you again.”
“Then why is she there and not here? She made me believe she was in love with me.” My head was about to explode with confusion and my eyes were getting moist.
“She is, Charles!”
I made a sound of skepticism and sat back down on the bed.
“Whenever she called me to report about the progress that she was making, she would talk about falling in love with you. I believe that part was very real.”
“You’re just saying that.”
“Don’t insult me. You know me better than that. I’m sorry Liv chose to stay at the manor. It wasn’t part of the plan.”
I was quiet, trying to calm my emotions and think rationally. “So, what was the plan?”