BONE_A Contemporary Romantic Medical Suspense Story

by Dee Palmer

  Regan will never fail you. She says everyone deserves a second chance, yet she gave me endless chances, and I never once thanked her. Even now I doubt I’ve put in place anything to make her life easy. I plan to, but I also plan on being around and making amends with the shit I’ve done in my life, with you, with her. I hope I get the chance, and that this letter never sees the light of day.

  If I really believed that, though, I wouldn’t have written this. I don’t know why I feel my life will not be long and happy. I hope it will be happy, at least, and I know with you in my life, it will be better than I deserve.

  Even apples with rotten cores can look perfect on the outside, and that’s all I’ve ever been, hollow and superficial. You made me whole and good. You are the best thing I ever did, and I know Regan will know that too, and she will be the best mother an innocent like you could wish for.

  I love you, and Regan, because you will have had to read this too, I’m sorry. You were always the better half of our mother’s womb, and as much as I hated you for that, I loved you fiercely too. I’m just sorry I never got to tell you. Stubborn to the end.

  Above everything, though, I’m sorry…it doesn’t matter for what specifically. I’m sorry, and I hope you never find out why.

  Take care of my baby.

  Ray

  P.S. I like the names Ruby and Reece.

  “She left this for you? Like she knew she was going to die? Didn’t that freak you out?”

  “Oh, just a little.” Thick sarcasm coats my words, and he has the grace to look sheepish. “I was clearing out her apartment after receiving an eviction notice for unpaid rent, and Ruby was still in the NICU when I found it. I think the fact that I had so much to deal with was why it didn’t really register. Honestly, I was actually mad at her when I first read it. After, though, after I got Ruby home, and we settled into our routine, I read it again, and it helped. She was a fucked-up mess, and not a great sister by any stretch, but I have to believe her intentions and that what she wrote in the letter was real, that being pregnant changed her, and she was going to be a better person for Ruby.”

  “What did she mean, ‘Hope you never find out why?’ What did she do? I mean apart from not providing for her own child and leaving you to deal with all her shit, what else did she do?”

  “That has kept me awake for more nights than I care to think. I have no idea. I believe she just meant she was sorry for a lot of things. Dying kind of trumps any grudges, and as angry as I was, I had to forgive her, or I’d never be able to tell Ruby about her real mother without my jaw aching from the fake smile.”

  “Does she know?”

  “I told her she has two mommas, and one’s in heaven. She doesn’t need to know the truth right now.” I shrug, happy with my decision.

  “I guess she doesn’t really need to know the truth at all,” Joel comments, but it sounds like an open-ended question..

  “That Raleigh is her real mum?”

  “That Raleigh is probably somewhere a little hotter.” He quirks his lips in a knowing grin, and I crack the first smile since Joel crashed my date. Talking of hotter,

  “How are you feeling?” He’s clearly up to cracking jokes.

  “Better than I deserve. Can you ever forgive me?” His throat bobs with a slow swallow, and I can see his eyes hold the edge of apprehension and hope.

  “Can you?” I counter. I never realised I even needed to hear this until I said it out loud. My breath catches as a slow confident smile illuminates his face.

  “Forgiven,” he says. Emotion mixes with my words, clogging in my throat, and I have to mouth the same words back to him just as his lips crash into mine.

  His hands thread into my hair, his fingers gripping to the point of pain, tearing a guttural moan from deep inside my chest, a familiar longing that resonates. He moves my face this way and that, like he can’t get enough, his tongue spears my lips and dominates my mouth, wrapping around my tongue, drawing my own tongue into his, twisting, tasting, devouring. I open my eyes when he breaks contact, and I have to blink to break the intensity of his gaze; it’s too much. This is too much. I hate that I can’t trust myself when he’s this close, not even at the best of times, and this is far from the best of times. Nevertheless, I can’t deny the painful truths and raw revelations laid bare before us both that something is different, something pivotal. I know it. I feel it. I only wish I could trust it.

  “Joel, please. I don’t think this is a good idea.” My voice waivers like my shaky resolve.

  “You feel it too, don’t you?”

  My heart clenches, yes, yes, I feel it. Too terrified to acknowledge the significance, I crudely try to deflect.

  “Your erection? Yes, I feel it. It’s kind of hard to miss. It’s like a branding iron on my thigh.” I press my leg against his cock.

  “Not what I meant, and you know it. Don’t do that.” He eases back from the contact, and his tone is deadly serious.

  “Do what?”

  “Make this out to be just another lust-fuelled fucking session,” he reprimands, and as futile as it is, I started down this path of denial, and I have to persevere.

  “That’s all we are, Joel, fuck buddies.”

  “That’s all you think we are, but as I’ve said before, Reggie, you don’t have a fucking clue what you are talking about.”

  “I swear to god, Joel, if you tell me I’m special, I’ll rip your cock clean off with my bare hands.” My eyes fill with tears, and a wave of nostalgic emotion glazes my vision and soft focuses the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen, however they do little to lessen the impact of what he says next, words which decimate me.

  “It’s only ever been you, Regan, it’s only ever been us. I’m a fucking idiot for not telling you when I returned, but you’ve been hiding just as much as I have, and it ends tonight.”

  “Don’t,” I plead.

  “Too late. I love you.” He places his hand around my throat, his middle fingers resting gently on a racing pulse point that calms under his touch. He holds me, tethers me to him as his eyes seem to delve deeper inside me than ever before, infiltrating every fibre of my being until I feel his possession, everywhere.

  “Joel, I can’t breathe.” My soft voice breaks into a whimper, and he smiles at me like he’s won some grand prize. I don’t understand what’s happened, but I take comfort that he clearly feels the same, and however confused that is, we appear to be on the same page.

  “Me, neither.” He stands and pulls me flush again his hard body. He tips my chin up lightly with his finger and informs me, “Tomorrow we talk. Tonight, I claim what’s mine, over and over again, if necessary, or just until you understand there is only us.”

  He’s right about one thing: I can’t focus on a single thing other than the heat consuming us both. Sensual flames seem to engulf us both, distorting reality with a blissful haze all around where the only thing that makes sense to me is him, us. Flames lick my body where his fingers touch. His lips brand my skin. His gaze scorches my soul. As good as this feels now, I’m way too hot to be in heaven.

  “I’m burning up,” I pant.

  “Shower,” he suggests, and my whole body shudders at the idea.

  “Oh, god, yes.” My eager response makes him chuckle, and he scoops me into his arms, swishing the swathes of satin into my lap to prevent him tripping when he takes the five long strides to my compact bathroom with the world’s smallest shower. This could kill the mood. Joel places me carefully on my feet, and I have to fight the smirk as he takes in his next challenge, the glass cubicle with fixtures and fittings protruding from three of the four flat surfaces. Someone’s going to get hurt, and given his size, I think it’s going to be him.

  “Joel, we don’t have to do this together. I know there’s not much room. It’s a sexy idea, but having to surgically remove the shower-head from my ass because you’ve thrust too hard will not only put a damper on the evening, it might take some explaining at the Emergency Room.” He laughs while men
tally calculating the physics involved.

  “It’s fine, and it looks bigger than a single cubicle, we’ll make it work… my shower is bigger, though,” he muses.

  “Understatement. I bet your shower is bigger than my living room. Come on, let’s take this to the bedroom,” I offer, and he reels back like I’ve insulted his manhood, or worse, suggested he can’t do something. He always did love a challenge.

  “No, I can do this, we’ll just be careful,” he asserts, and I keep my mouth shut. I shouldn’t really be surprised; he’s not one to give up so easily. He slides the door open and leans in to turn the shower on full blast. I’m about to unhook the straps on my dress when he suddenly yanks me into the downpour. His body blocks most of the water when he turns and presses his back to the wall to give me more room but we are both instantly drenched. Harper’s going to kill me.

  “I’ll buy you a new one. I want to see the material stick to your body before I take it off. Trust me, it is totally worth it,” he says, disarming my initial fear with the raw desire of his gaze. The water heats my skin, yet I shiver when his hands deftly loosen my straps, and he peels the now heavy dress from my body. The electric blue is soaked to a more midnight colour, and the weight of the soaked material pulls it clean to the floor in a sodden mess of luxurious fabric, ruined. She’s still going to kill me. My skin prickles with a million bumps of erotic anticipation, and I have to focus to steady my breathing in the searing heat and clouds of steam enclosing around us. Despite the tropical heat, my nipples are tight peaks begging for attention, and I’m grateful he doesn’t keep them waiting. I cry out when his eager mouth covers and sucks, twirling his tongue around my stiff little pebbles. He holds both breasts up, reverently massaging, and he takes turns teasing and squeezing, nibbling and grazing the soft silky flesh with his teeth. He takes his time, and only when I’m a breathless, aching mess does he move, standing to his full height he towers above me and the spray from the shower head.

  One of his hands fists my hair, and I look up through soaked lashes to see him looking down with feral desire and liquid lust that consumes me. I tear his dress shirt straight down the middle, buttons fly and ricochet off the tiles, and I only stop when I’ve ripped it from his heaving wet chest, and even then I only take a moment to enjoy the wondrous sight. Hard muscle quivers with every deep, heavy breath. Water trickles over the bumps and dips of each sculpted curve of his abdomen until it gathers at the waistband and belt of his trousers. My next mission.

  My fingers fumble with the wanton need coursing through me. I unclip the buckle only to lose all motor function when he leans down and delicately kisses along my shoulder and up to my ear. It’s a pendulum of emotions, violently swinging from sweet and tender to raging, feral lust and back again. My head spins, and my heart is barely keeping up as I suck in deep breaths to fuel my rocketing desire. His other hand wraps around my waist, holding me tight to him, as I can’t help but writhe and undulate my body to his. Soft moans and groans echo off the tiled walls as we explore each other with fingers, mouths, and bodies. The water aids the glide of skin on skin, but I’m surprised it hasn’t sizzled or turned to steam, our bodies are so damn hot.

  He finishes my poor attempt at undressing, and while he’s kicking his pants to the floor, he drags my panties to join the final pile of clothes almost covering the entire shower tray. He tips my chin up, my lashes flutter with heavy drops of water, and my lips part with a full, wet, and wonderful smile.

  “You’re so beautiful,” he mouths, releases my chin, grabs my ass cheeks, and lifts me high on his hips, so I’m just hovering over the erection I can feel like a branding iron nudging between my cheeks. He positions the head of his cock at my entrance, homing in perfectly, and slides easily inside me right to the hilt in one thrust of his hips and a slight drop of my body.

  “Ah!” I sink my teeth into his neck, careful not to bite, but I’m not sure I have that level of restraint when this feels so good, so unbelievably deep.

  “You feel that, angel?” He exhales with a deep satisfying grumble as he flexes inside me.

  “Hard not to.” My voice is pitched and poised to cry out. I’ve never felt him this big and so damn deep, my pain sensors are on super high alert.

  “Not what I meant, but I’ll take the compliment.”

  “Yes, I feel that, and honestly, it scares the shit out me, Joel.” I know what he meant, and I’d take the pain of a thousand palm prints on my ass over being in love again.

  “Trust me?”

  “Joel,” My hands press flat on his shoulders as I try to gain any distance. I can’t do this, and I can’t get any kind of space; he’s everywhere.

  “Do you trust me?” It sounds more like a heartfelt plea rather than a question, and the look in his eyes almost breaks me. What does he want from me?

  “To break my heart again? Yes, I trust you’re capable of doing that.”

  “Reggie, I love you.” I swear the water turns to shards of ice, and I can’t breathe from the shock. Steam continues to billow in clouds around us, and as I realise the water temperature is unchanged, I wake up.

  “Don’t do that. You don’t have to do that, Joel.” A chill taints my tone.

  “I know I don’t, if you know one thing about me, Regan, you know I don’t have to do anything, but I need you to know I love you. I should’ve told you long before now and this probably isn’t the right time.”

  “Oh, I don’t know.” I hold my impassive expression for just a second before I crack and blurt out a deep belly laugh, of all the times…

  “Ah, no, no laughing.” Joel tenses, and his eyes widen with panic which fuels the fire, and I fight to contain the fit of giggles I’ve unwittingly unleashed, “You clamp like you’re going to squeeze my cock off when you laugh. It’s killing me.”

  “But what a way to go.” I quell the laughter but feel the truth in everything he’s just said, and my smile couldn’t be any wider. I clasp his head and place a thousand kisses all over his face, playfully at first, but the underlying current of sexual tension bursts its banks. Joel turns us and slams me hard against the only wall with no hanging bath toys, scrubbing utensils or scented paraphernalia.

  “Right, only one way to stop that wickedness, young lady.” He growls

  “Oh, God!” I cry at the depth of him inside me.

  “That’ s more like it.” He fists my sodden hair and yanks. My head tilts, and I gasp for air as he thrusts his tongue into my open mouth. It’s ferocious and wild. Like a storm brewing, the crashing of lips and bones are like thunder, as I match his urgent thrusts with greedy grinding and desperate hands on firm unyielding flesh, countering each move of his possessive tongue with my own demanding moves. He slides his arm under one of my legs and pushes it flat to the cool tile. Angling his hips, he buries himself even deeper than before, and my whole body freezes with the shock of sweet pain. My eyes water, and I can’t speak, so I simply absorb every thick inch stretching my core.

  My arms tighten around his shoulders, and my whole body, still tense at the intrusion, quakes as a deep rumbling explosion grips the base of my spine and sets off a chain reaction I am helpless to contain.

  “Relax, beautiful,” he coaxes, and I nod. My eyes fix on him, passion, desire and undeniable love mirror the glassy reflection of his golden irises.

  “Look at me,” he demands, the strain in his voice the only evidence he’s struggling with the enormity of what we’re sharing. It cracks in just the right places. My, bottom lip is gripped between my teeth. So much for relaxing.

  “Breathe with me, angel. Feel me, hmm?” His exhales the words softly over my face, and I smile, nodding. “Feel how deep I am. How good does that feel?” His tone is deep and gravelly, calm and soothing, washing over me.

  “So good.” I sigh, and he languidly rolls his hips once more, making me suck in a sharp breath when he hits that sweet spot. “Oh God, so good.” My voice catches and I drop my mouth open on a silent cry.

  “More?�
� he asks, and I have to question my sanity when I reply. His eyes are fixed on me, deep, dark pools of liquid lust.

  “More…please.” He complies, thrusting, relentless and feral, pushing me higher, he delves deeper, owning every inch of me, mind, body, and soul. I’m seized by an almighty shock of pleasure that tears through me out of nowhere. I explode as he continues to drive into me. My lips seek his, ravenous for the contact. Dazed and delirious, I float, my lips part, and an inaudible whimper is all I can manage.

  Only as we slide to the floor, our landing softened by the deep pile of soaking wet clothes, do I realise that Joel didn’t come. He’s still rock hard and deep inside my limp and sated body.

  “I’m sorry, but I don’t have an ounce of energy left. You should’ve come with me.” My head flops onto his chest, for a moment too heavy for me to hold up. When I finally manage to tip it back so I can look up, he speaks.

  “And miss watching you fall like that? Not a chance.” He wipes the trickles of water funnelling down my brow and sweeps them away from my eyes. “You’re stunning when you come. I could have that image tattooed on my chest and never tire of looking at it.”

  “Because everyone loves a come face.” I snort.

  “Not at all, just yours. You’re stunning.” The sentiment makes me smile, the twitch of his cock inside me, however, makes me wince.

  “I’m exhausted.” I confess.

  “Then let’s get you to bed.” He kisses my forehead, but I’m already shaking my head.

  “Oh no, I didn’t mean that. I want you to…you know. It’s just I’m not sure how much participation you can expect on my part. I haven’t been up this late since Ruby was a baby, and certainly not like this since, well, you, actually.”