Finding Forever

by Gael, Christine

  “They were slow dancing,” Steph replied. “Close…realllly close. To some romantic music. They looked like the world’s biggest lovebirds. I almost felt like a voyeur, to tell you the truth.”

  “Holy crap,” muttered Cee-cee. “I didn’t think Pop had it in him.”

  “Me neither,” Anna agreed and then paused, considering. “Although…”

  Steph looked at her. “What?”

  “The other day, when I was over,” Anna replied, “I walked in on them laughing. They were practically in hysterics. I didn’t think much of it at the time, but…”

  “Wow,” Cee-cee said, shaking her head. And then she began to laugh. “Eva and Pop. I never would have thought that would happen.”

  “They were always bickering,” added Stephanie. “I lost track of the number of times she called him an old curmudgeon. And he constantly tells her what a harpy she is. I was honestly scared she was going to get fed up with him and quit, and we would have to find someone else.”

  Anna grinned in spite of herself. “I guess they’re kind of made for each other, though, don’t you think?” she asked, relief already beginning to wash over her. She wasn’t sure what she had been expecting, but it certainly hadn’t been this.

  I’ll be damned, she thought, chuckling.

  “Well, yeah,” Cee-cee agreed, and grinned. “I mean, who else is going to put up with him?”

  “That’s a fair point,” Steph acknowledged, leaning back in her chair and taking another bite of her cupcake. “Anyway,” she said, “that’s the news. I thought you guys should know. It’s… kind of unprecedented.”

  “You can say that again,” said Cee-cee. “And I admit it, I’m gobsmacked. But I’m also happy. I think.”

  “You know,” Anna said slowly, “I think I am, too. If things are going this well between them, then I say let them go for it. They’re both kind of lonely – I think they could use something like this.”

  Stephanie cleared her throat. “It could be good for Pop,” she said. “I’ve been thinking about it, and I’m just wondering if it still makes sense for us to keep her on as a caregiver. If they break up, things could get messy.”

  “True,” said Cee-cee, “but there was always that risk, even before they were involved. Pop’s not easy to get along with.”

  “And you said yourself that it would be hard to find a replacement,” Anna pointed out. “I vote we just let things progress naturally. If things go sideways, we can cross that bridge when we come to it. Eva deserves to get paid for the work she does – she’s been a lifesaver ever since the fire. If she can get some happiness out of the time she spends with Pop, then I say, all the better.”

  “Fair enough,” said Stephanie, nodding. “I don’t think we need to do anything about it. Honestly, I just couldn’t stand being the only one with that picture in their head. So, you’re welcome for that.”

  Anna and Cee-cee both chuckled.

  “Yeah, no matter how old you are, it’s still a little weird to see your parent getting frisky,” Anna said.

  “So weird,” Steph agreed. “But I guess we’ll just leave things alone and see how they play out.” She glanced down at her watch and straightened up. “Anyway, I’m sorry to cut this short, but I’d better head over to the clinic. We had to amputate a dog’s leg yesterday, and I need to make sure he’s doing okay.”

  Anna and Cee-cee exchanged a look as Stephanie stood up, and Anna put a hand on her sister’s wrist. “Can you stick around for a few more minutes, Steph? I actually – I mean, we actually wanted to talk to you.”

  “Oh. Um, sure.” Stephanie looked at the two of them warily, reminding Anna a little of a cornered animal. Slowly, she sat back down, her posture stiff and uncomfortable. “What’s up?”

  Anna cleared her throat and nodded to Cee-cee, who just stared back at her, eyes wide. Anna glared at her pointedly. She’s the oldest, she reasoned. She should be the one giving the motherly talk.

  Cee-cee scowled at her for another moment before clearing her throat, sighing, and putting her hands on the table. “We’re worried about you, Steph,” she said simply.

  Stephanie’s brow furrowed. “Why?” she asked, crossing her arms. “There’s nothing to worry about. I’m fine.”

  “You’re not fine,” Anna said, her tone gentle but firm. “We were talking earlier about the last time I visited, and how you were still in bed when I got there. That’s not like you.”

  “Come on,” Steph replied, sounding a little defensive, “that was one time. I mean, am I not allowed to sleep in anymore?”

  “Sleeping in for you is getting up at eight AM,” Anna said. “It’s not being in bed until noon.”

  “And it’s not just that,” added Cee-cee, touching Steph’s hand lightly. Steph flinched a little at the contact, but said nothing. “You haven’t been yourself lately. You’ve been shaky, jumpy, you look exhausted… There was that time in the restaurant, when you left early, not to mention all the times I’ve caught you zoning out.”

  “Guys,” Steph said, looking like she was getting ready to brush them off, “please--”

  “Are you depressed?” asked Anna, not wanting to gang up on her but unable to help herself. “Or is it something else? Are you still taking the meds your doctor prescribed?”

  There was a flash of outrage in Steph’s eyes, and Anna could see she had touched a nerve. Stephanie opened her mouth to speak, closed it, and then opened it again, looking from one sister to the other with an expression that had now become pleading. Finally, she sighed, looking down at her half-eaten cupcake.

  “Okay, so I’ve been… having a bit of a hard time,” she admitted slowly, quietly. “Things haven’t been easy since what happened with Bryan, I guess.”

  “What’s going on?” Cee-cee asked her softly. “You can talk to us.”

  “Just some anxiety,” Steph insisted. “And I appreciate your concern, but I’m fine. Really. I just need some more time.”

  “What about your medication?” Anna persisted. “Are you still taking it?”

  “I have a prescription,” replied Steph, looking a little uneasy. “I’ve been seeing the same doctor since the accident.”

  Cee-cee shook her head slowly. “It’s been months. If you’re leaning on this too much…” She sighed. “Just because you have a prescription doesn’t mean it’s a good idea to keep taking it.”

  “It’s medicine,” protested Steph. “And I’m pretty sure my doctor knows more than you do about it,” she snapped.

  “Is it supposed to be taken every day,” Anna pressed. Something in her sister’s face told her the answer was no. “It’s not, right, Steph? It’s meant to be situational.”

  Stephanie remained silent, not meeting her eyes. Anna pulled her phone out of her back pocket and brought up a search engine, her fingers already flying over the keyboard.

  “Look,” she said moments later, showing them a web page. “It says right here that eight to twelve percent of people prescribed meds like that over long periods develop a dependence. And look,” she added, scrolling down. “Twenty-one to twenty-nine percent misuse them.”

  That made Stephanie bristle. “Misuse them?” she demanded, her voice rising a little. “So you think I’m a druggie, now?”

  “Stephanie, wait a minute,” said Cee-cee. “It’s a common thing to have happen. It’s not a judgment.”

  “You’re saying I’m abusing my medication,” Stephanie said. “How is that not judgy? I am running a successful vet clinic while also taking care of our father. Pretty sure if I was an addict, I wouldn’t be doing all that.”

  “That’s not what we’re saying,” Anna protested. “We’re asking if you’re being careful, and letting you know that if you’re having a hard time right now, we should work together to find other solutions.”

  “Oh, please,” Steph said, rolling her eyes. “Stop acting all high and mighty, okay? You have no idea what I’ve been going through!”

  Things were escalating, and Anna
felt helpless to stop them. “That’s what we’re trying to understand!”

  “Don’t do me any favors.” Abruptly, Stephanie shot to her feet, shoving her chair out from the table with more force than needed. She was shaking a little now, her eyes flashing as they darted from Anna to Cee-cee. She grabbed her purse and slung it over her shoulder. “You’re not my doctors. I’m going to keep taking the medication I’ve been prescribed – which, by the way, is supposed to be helping me deal with the aftermath of getting kidnapped and shot by my husband’s murderer. My trauma was like something ripped out of a frigging Lifetime movie. I’m lucky to be alive. So the next time you want to attack me for the way I’m handling things, just remember that.”

  Still bristling with barely-contained fury, Stephanie spun on her heel and marched toward the door. She made it nearly all the way there before pausing, turning around, and coming back to grab the rest of her cupcake. With a sniff, she stormed out of the kitchen a second time, leaving Anna and their oldest sister to stare after her in stunned silence.

  Well, damn.

  That hadn’t gone at all like she’d hoped. But there was one thing Anna knew now for sure.

  Stephanie was on a very slippery slope, and if they didn’t find a way to get through to her soon, it might be too late.

  16

  Stephanie

  “So you’re just going to want to keep the boots on for the next six weeks,” Steph explained, lifting the annoyed-looking cat from the examination table and handing her back over to her owner. “She’ll probably try to find ways of getting them off, so make sure they’re on tight enough that she can’t wriggle out of them.”

  “And after six weeks?” Lois, a worried-looking woman not much older than Steph herself, asked.

  “The meds should take care of the itching,” Steph replied. “If not, bring her back in and we’ll try another course.”

  “Thank you, Doc, you’re the best!” Lois replied, tucking the cat back into her carrier and picking it up.

  Steph got up and opened the door to the exam room, giving her the most coolly professional smile she could manage. “You’re welcome,” she said. “If you notice anything else off with her, please don’t hesitate to call us.” She led the woman back down the hallway and into the reception area, where Todd was rifling through some papers at the desk.

  “Everything good?” he asked, looking up.

  “Yes,” Steph answered curtly. “Everything’s fine.” Todd’s eyes narrowed and she cleared her throat, not liking the way he was studying her. “What time is it?” she asked abruptly.

  “Oh, uh…” Todd glanced at his watch. “Almost eleven thirty.”

  “Thank god,” muttered Steph, running a hand through her hair. “I’m starving.”

  Truth be told, she wasn’t sure if she could eat anything right now, but lunch had started to look like her only reprieve from her son’s scrutiny. She knew he was worried about her, and she could appreciate that in the objective sense, but the last thing she wanted right now was more of her loved ones looking at her like she was some kind of failed science experiment. It was hard enough keeping her cool around him when the subject of Cee-cee and Anna came up; if he started asking questions about her mental state, that might just be enough to send her over the edge.

  It had been a few days since Steph had last spoken to her sisters, and she’d been doing her best to be cool about the whole thing, but she was unable to control the anger she felt whenever she thought back to that morning at Cee-cee’s bakery.

  They had trapped her. Like a set up. She’d gotten them together to tell them what she had seen between Pop and Eva – she hadn’t had to, but she’d wanted to – and they’d used the opportunity to corner her and grill her like some sort of criminal.

  It made her see red every time she thought about it.

  Todd straightened up and turned to head into his office, but stopped in the doorway and glanced back at her. “Mom?” he said, that cautious, curious look still on his face. “You look distracted.”

  “I’m fine,” Steph insisted, although even she was starting to have trouble believing it.

  The truth was, she knew she wasn’t in a good place right now. It was something she’d been refusing to acknowledge for a long time now, but even denial could only last so long. She was struggling, and things didn’t seem to be getting any better, even with the medication. That said, though, was it so much to hope that her own sisters would cut her a little slack? They had seen what she’d been through over the past few months; she had trusted them to understand and be in her corner. For them to gang up on her like that made her feel an almost irrational sense of betrayal. Maybe some part of her did know that they were just trying to help, but that part was overpowered by her own frustration. It made for an unsavory combination, and time by herself or with Ethan was starting to feel like her only respite.

  Todd opened his mouth to say something else, but they were interrupted by the sound of the front door opening. Into the clinic hurried Jane Stover, followed by her young son, Anthony. Jane had been coming to Steph’s clinic for years now, ever since their family dog, Beau, was a puppy. It had been a pleasure to watch the spirited jack russell terrier grow – a bit, Steph imagined, like how it might feel for a family doctor to watch a child grow up.

  Now, however, it was immediately clear that something was very wrong, and not just from the bloody bundle Jane had managed to carry in with her. The woman’s features were wracked with worry, and her ten-year-old son Anthony was practically in hysterics.

  “Mrs. Stover?” asked Steph, all thoughts of her sisters temporarily gone from her mind as she rushed over. “What happened?”

  “It’s Beau,” Jane replied, her voice shaking. “We were just heading inside to bring in our groceries. He raced out the door and ran into the street, and…”

  “Hey, it’s okay,” Todd said, coming to stand beside his mother as he helped her take Beau from Jane. “Let’s see what’s going on, okay?”

  “Okay,” Jane said, her eyes wide.

  “What’s gonna happen to Beau?” asked Anthony, wiping at his red-rimmed, teary eyes with his sleeve.

  “We’re going to figure out what’s wrong with him,” Stephanie told him, handing off the dog to her son as she popped a squat in front of the weeping child. “If you can sit out here and wait with your mom, I promise we’re going to do everything we can to get him fixed up, all right?”

  The child nodded with a sniffle and she straightened. “If you guys don’t mind waiting out here, Todd and I will get him into an exam room right away.”

  “Thank you,” Jane said, taking Anthony by the hand and slowly dropping into a chair. “Thank you. Please do whatever you can. He’s part of the family.”

  “We’ll treat him like our own,” Todd assured her. They walked briskly into the back, injured animal in tow. As soon as they had him on the exam table, they worked together to unwrap him from the blanket, which was soaked with blood. The dog’s breathing was labored, his eyes wide and listless.

  “What did she say happened?” Todd asked as he began to take Beau’s vitals, working like a machine.

  “Hit by a car,” replied Steph. “What’s his blood pressure?”

  “Seventy over thirty-nine.”

  “Damn. Okay. Do you hear that?”

  Todd put his stethoscope back to Beau’s chest, although that wasn’t necessary to hear the strained, whistling sound of the dog’s breathing. “Sounds like some kind of respiratory trauma,” he said. “Collapsed lung?”

  Stephanie nodded. “That’s what I was thinking. Maybe traumatic pneumothorax.” This was fairly common for dogs who were hit by cars – a puncture wound to the lung could cause air to seep into the chest cavity, putting pressure on the internal organs and making breathing difficult. Just because it was common didn’t mean it wasn’t dangerous, though.

  “Here,” she said, pushing the blanket out of the way, “help me turn him over.” They worked together to roll t
he terrier onto his side to minimize the pressure on his right lung, which, judging by the way his chest was moving, looked to be the one that was still intact. They were going to have to work quickly. “Oxygen--” she began.

  “Already on it,” Todd said, wheeling the tank over and attaching the mask over Beau’s mouth. The dog didn’t struggle.

  “Start prepping for anesthesia,” Steph told Todd as she pulled on her own pair of gloves. “We’re going to have to do a thoracentesis.”

  “Got it,” Todd said, already getting gloves on and beginning to assemble the necessary supplies. He was fast and efficient, and Steph felt a surge of pride seeing how easily her son navigated an emergency like this. There was a reason he’d followed in her footsteps, after all. Within a minute, he had laid out the instruments they needed, and was already turning back to the medication cabinet. “Ketamine?” he asked.

  “No,” said Steph. “We don’t want him seizing up on us. Use Telazol.” She took a moment to appraise the dog before nodding and adding, “Try 210 milligrams.”

  Todd did as he was told, putting the anesthetic into the IV and beginning to prepare an injection site in the cephalic vein on Beau’s left foreleg. In the meantime, Steph squatted down and looked into the pup’s large, frightened eyes. She stroked the top of his head between his ears, making a gentle shushing sound and murmuring, “It’s going to be all right, big boy. It’s going to be all right.”

  Whether she was saying this more to the dog or to herself, she had no idea. Either way, Beau seemed to appreciate the soothing words, and his tail gave a couple of weak wags as she continued to comfort him.

  Within moments, Todd had administered the IV, and soon Beau’s body had relaxed, his eyes glazed over. He wasn’t under all the way, but this would be enough to do the trick for their purposes. “I don’t think we have time to clip him,” Todd said, approaching Steph’s side of the table.

  “It’s fine,” Steph replied. “Let’s just take some of this pressure off.”