by Robin Roseau
“She came to meet me.”
“Prestainamatta, I would consider it a personal favor if you would find time to talk to her. I don’t know what she wants to talk to you about, but this woman is very important to me. Please.”
“Of course, Yalla,” she said. “Of course.” Then she turned back to Ralalta and stepped forward.
“She’s moving closer,” I said quietly in Framaran. And then the Goddess lifted a hand and caressed Ralalta’s cheek. “She’s touching you.”
Ralalta leaned her head sideways. “I can feel her,” she said. “Oh, I can feel her.”
“What does she say?”
“She feels your touch,” I said.
“She does.” The Goddess turned her head to me. “Truly?” She withdrew her hand but caressed Ralalta’s arm instead, and Ralalta looked down at her arm. “She feels me. Oh, Yalla. She feels me. Ask her for me. Ask her.”
“Ralalta,” I said. “She wants to know if you know what Prestainamatta means, and if you hold her in your heart as your Prestainamatta.”
The next nine words Ralalta said were in the language of the Goddess. “Life,” she said. “Love. Joy. Gift given. Gift received. Trust. Serenity. Change.” And then she paused before adding, “Prestainamatta.” She paused again, and then she pressed her hands to her chest. “Prestainamatta,” she repeated. “Yes, Yalla. Tell her yes.”
“She knows what it means?” the Goddess asked.
“She does,” I said.
“This is too important,” she said. “I must see. I must see into her heart, but I would not violate her privacy without permission, and I will need your help. Ask her.”
“Ralalta,” I said. “She wants to look into your heart. She asks permission.”
Ralalta nodded. “Yes,” she said firmly. She straightened further.
“You must place your hands here,” the Goddess indicated, pointing one towards the side of Ralalta’s head and then at her chest. I stepped forward and reached for my queen. She held still as I laid hands on her. And then the Goddess added her hands over mine. “Tell her this won’t hurt.”
I repeated that, and Ralalta said, “I am not afraid.”
I wondered if she lied, but I didn’t ask.
Then the Goddess’s hands began to glow, and mine with hers.
“Oh, Yalla,” she said. “Oh. There is hope. There is such hope.” She withdrew her hands, but she was smiling broadly. “Oh, Yalla,” she said. “Queen Ralalta, be welcome in my Heart.”
“Thank you, Prestainamatta,” Ralalta answered.
“Yalla,” said the Goddess. “Tell her we will have much to discuss, but we must finish our greetings.” And then she took on a fresh smile, and I laughed.
“I know that look, Prestainamatta! Shall we send Ralalta and the young acolytes away?”
“Not just yet,” she replied. “I wish to meet Lamarta, and then you must greet our priestesses, and there are two other new acolytes I must also formally meet.”
“Of course.” I turned. “Mellara. Lamarta.” I held my hand out, and the two approached, Mellara’s hands on her daughter’s shoulders. I couldn’t tell which was most nervous.
“There is no reason to be afraid,” I said as they drew nearer.
“This is Mellara,” Yahamala said. “Your former maid. I watched when she came here the first time.”
“You did?”
“Of course. She loves you, you know.”
“And I love her.”
As they drew closer, Lamarta grew increasingly reluctant. “Prestainamatta,” I said quietly. “She’s nervous.”
“She is so far from home, and am I not frightening?”
“She can’t even see you.”
The Goddess grinned.
Lamarta and Mellara came to a stop. I told them, “When you hear your name, step forward and curtsey.” I gestured. “She is here. When you speak, speak to her, as best you can, and not to me. I will translate.” They both nodded, and I turned back to the Goddess. “Prestainamatta, this is Lamarta, your new acolyte.”
“Our new acolyte,” she corrected me.
Mellara had to push her daughter forward, but the girl took a half step and then sank into a curtsey. The Goddess took her own step and said, “Lamarta, welcome to my heart, and to my Heart. Thank you for coming.”
I translated that and told her she could stand up. The Goddess studied the girl carefully and then turned to me with a smile. “She is weary and tired, but she is ready for her new life. And this is her mother.”
“This is Mellara, my maid and first friend upon arriving in Framara as a girl. She means the world to me.”
“Welcome her to my Heart,” said the Goddess. “And tell her I see she has questions. We will find time to answer them in the days coming.”
“Thank you, Goddess,” Mellara responded. She looked like she wanted to say more, but then she closed her mouth and looked down at the ground.
“Is Lamarta’s father also here?”
“No.”
“But he and Mellara are married and happy?”
“Yes,” I said.
“Pity,” the Goddess said with a grin. “She is welcome to stay, but she may wish to spend the night in the village with the young acolytes.”
“Prestainamatta!”
“It is your choice if you wish to explain to her the choice,” the Goddess continued.
“Oh, no,” I said. “I think I’ll leave that to two others.”
“Well then,” she said. “It is time for you to greet our priestesses, and then...” she trailed off. I had a good idea what would happen next.
And so I turned, drawing Mellara and Lamarta back to a waiting Alta and Ralalta. “I’ll be a few minutes, then there are more introductions.” But I took Lamarta from her mother and led her to her place in line with the other acolytes. I turned to the waiting priestesses and said firmly, “I’ve missed all of you!”
That was all the offer they really needed, and I found myself surrounded, then passed from one set of arms to another. I hugged them all, holding tightly and taking my time. And some I kissed, maybe on a cheek, or just as likely, lips. Hastiá was there, and so she and Vérundia both received warm hugs and kisses. And it had become my custom to offer Ullaméistra a kiss as well.
I came to the acolytes last. They each received a hug, a kiss on the cheek, and whispered words telling them how proud I was of each of them. They hugged me tightly in return, and a few said such things as, “I’m glad you’re here.”
I included my daughters and Lamarta in the hugs, wanting to treat them like I did the others, and I also came to two acolytes I hadn’t met in person before. Oh, I knew when they had been selected by the Goddess, but I hadn’t met them. With those, I spent an extra minute or so and told them I’d want to talk to them much longer while I was here.
Finally I gestured. Alta led the rest over, including Riesa, the nanny. Alta, of course, knew almost everyone, and Ralalta had met many of the priestesses, but not all.
“You came!” Vérundia said, speaking in her deeply accented Framaran. “I don’t think I could be happier. And Mellara. It is good to see you again, and under much happier circumstances than your last visit. Are you pleased to be here?”
Mellara looked down for a moment, then over to me, and then nodded, but I didn’t find it convincing.
“She has unanswered questions,” I said. “The Goddess has promised answers, but I don’t blame her for being nervous.”
I was half afraid someone would make promises to take care of Lamarta, but thankfully, no one did. I didn’t want any reminders that Mellara might be forever parting with her daughter. There was time enough for that, if that was what the Goddess decided.
But then the Goddess was there. “Yalla,” she said. “There are three guests I do not know, and I wish to greet my new apprentices. And then we must speak to Vérundia briefly before moving inside.”
“Of course.” I gestured. “This is Maráestára and Peralianíta. They are Q
ueen Mesenorié’s maids, but she has loaned them to us.” I smiled and leaned closer. “Féla and Naddí have been trying to seduce them, but I don’t know if they’ve been successful.”
Thankfully, either none of the priestesses heard me or she was smart enough not to repeat my words. But the Goddess laughed. “I wish to look into their hearts. Please ask permission.”
On hearing the request, they nodded, and it took only a minute or so for the Goddess to see what she wished to see, working through me like she had with Ralalta. When she was done, she clapped happily. “Welcome them into my Heart, but I do not want them warned.”
“Warned.”
“Don’t be coy.”
I laughed, relayed the greetings, then returned to the language of the Goddess to repeat to Vérundia what the Goddess had said.
“Warned?”
“She told me not to be coy,” I said.
At that, Vérundia turned to Hastiá and took her hand, the two smiling together.
Then I introduced Riesa. The Goddess greeted her but then looked at Riesa then me, then at Riesa and my daughters. She frowned.
“What’s wrong?”
“She cares for your children, but she does not love you or them.”
“She is a very good nanny, and she cares for them.”
But still the Goddess frowned. “Do you believe she holds me in her heart.”
“I find it unlikely. Unless it has been a portion of her duties, she has never visited the temple, and she has never asked anything about you. Are you upset with me?”
“How could I be upset with you? You have brought the Queen of Framara to me.” She offered a brief smile. “There are places for her in the village. I do not want her within my Heart. If Mandi and Nissi require a nanny here, Vérundia can assign one.”
“Of course.” I switched back to Framara. “Riesa, you’ll get a well-deserved rest from your duties. There should be a place for you in the village; someone will bring you shortly.”
I thought perhaps she might argue with me, but Alta was right there and pulled her away, and I let my wife deal with it.
After that, the Goddess met the two new acolytes, spending time with each and promising more, and then she stepped away. “Bring Vérundia, Larien, Terélmarestra, and Ralalta, please.”
I gathered all of them, and we followed the Goddess to the other side of the arch. When she turned, she was grinning widely again. “I’ve missed you so, but you have brought me such joy today.”
“I have missed you as well.” I moved into her arms, and we held each other for a minute.
“You will repeat my words.”
“Of course, Prestainamatta.”
“Vérundia, I believe Hallámierté should escort Queen Ralalta to her quarters.”
“Prestainamatta-“
“Say my words, my High Priestess.”
“But-“
“Say my words.”
“This is a bad idea.”
“It is a very good idea,” she countered. “Say my words, and speak no words I do not understand.”
I sighed. “Vérundia, our Prestainamatta feels Hallámierté should show Queen Ralalta to her quarters. Prestainamatta-“
She set fingers over my lips. “No one is ensnared by our myrasieartet unless she wishes to be.”
And so I nodded. “Larien, please translate this to Ralalta.” I turned to the queen. “I love you. Welcome to the Heart of the Goddess.” Then I hugged her tightly. Still speaking in the language of the Goddess, I said, “I will see you in the morning. I hope you enjoy your evening.”
Larien translated, and then with a nod from Vérundia, took Ralalta by the arm and led her back to the other priestesses, handing her off to Hallámierté.
We watched them head into the cavern, Ralalta looking over her shoulder once more. I blew her a kiss and smiled before turning back to the Goddess.
“Vérundia,” said the Goddess. “We will talk tomorrow.” She grinned. “Myrasieartet. See to it. Yalla, Lásenalta will join us. Call her.”
“Alta,” I called. She turned to me, and I held out my hand. She crossed to me and took it, and I was already holding the other to the Goddess. Together, the three of us turned into the cavern.
Behind us, I knew there was a scramble, but Vérundia was good, and soon we had a stream of laughing priestesses following behind the three of us.
We approached the abyss, a great drop leading deep into the mountain. There was a path along the outside, and that was the route I thought we would take. Oh, the Goddess usually carried me, and we floated together to the bottom, but she’d once said she couldn’t do that with anyone else, and she couldn’t mean to bring Alta that way.
“It is time to see how well you have learned to channel my magic,” she said. “Hold tight to the princess.”
Outside my will, my hand clasped Alta’s, and then the Goddess pulled me right off the edge. I tried to release my wife, but my hand wouldn’t obey, and I pulled her, screaming, over the edge.
And then we floated there. Oh, neither of us was gracious about it. First, we both screamed, and Alta found herself floating upside down, and scrambled to right herself. But we floated, all three of us, the Goddess laughing.
“You said you couldn’t do that!” I complained.
“Things change,” she said. “Oh, she looks silly. Pull her to me, but do not release her.”
The Goddess pulled us both in, helping Alta to turn upright. My wife was gasping for air, but once she was right side up, she looked around. “We’re floating.” She looked down. “Yalla! You could have warned me.”
“I didn’t know she was going to do it,” I replied.
“You pulled me with you.”
“I couldn’t let go. It’s not my fault.”
“Come along, now,” said the Goddess. “I am anxious.”
We began to descend, but we went more slowly than usual, and the priestesses for a while were in the lead. But we touched down a moment or two before the ones most in the lead, and the giggling goddess pulled Alta and me along through the corridors.
“Where are we going?” Alta called out.
“I imagine the Heart of the Heart,” I said. “I hope your under things are clean.”
“We’ve been on the road for weeks. What do you think?”
* * * *
We didn’t slow until we reached the Heart of the Heart, the great cavern glittering around us. The Goddess released my hand as we stepped in, turning towards me and stepping backwards, watching me.
I, as I always did, found myself looking up at all the glittering gems. “It’s so beautiful,” I whispered.
“Yalla,” said the Goddess. “My words.”
“But Alta-“
“Alta will understand what she needs to understand.” She crooked her finger. “Come to me.”
Alta was watching me. I smiled at her then pulled her forward, following Yahamala to the altar. She circled the altar, only half way, then waited for us, standing beside the altar. I knew without looking we faced the word “Joy”. I could feel all the words, and could sense them with my eyes closed.
Such was the magic of the Goddess.
“I wish the two of you to touch,” she said. “And until much later, you may only speak my words.”
I nodded. “Yes, Prestainamatta.” I turned towards my wife and smiled, stepping closer. I caressed her cheek. And then my hands moved to her cloak. I released the clasp and let it fall to the floor beside us. Then I went to work on her other clothes.
I confused Alta. I was never the aggressor in lovemaking. “What are you doing?”
I caressed her cheek and then kissed her, briefly, fleetingly, but my fingers continued to work on her clothing.
The Goddess stood behind me, watching, but she began moving around us, staying very close, breathing into my ear, and then moving behind Alta and breathing into hers. She whispered something, but I couldn’t hear what it was.
Alta smiled. “She’s here, isn’t s
he?” I nodded. “She’s telling you to do this.” I nodded again, and then I lifted the tunic over her head.
“Well then,” said my wife. And she lifted her hands to my own clothing.
We undressed slowly, like unwrapping presents. And the Goddess circled us; she caressed us. She kissed Alta’s head and my shoulder, once it was bare.
And then I knelt before my wife and removed her boots, one and then the other. With a grin, I pulled her leggings from her, helping her to step out of them. When I stood, I pressed us together, and then the Goddess was at my back, pressing against me as I embraced my wife.
“I love you, Yallameenara,” she said. “I have missed you so much.”
“And I missed you,” I said.
And then the Goddess began helping Alta to remove the last of my clothing. When Alta realized what was happening, she began laughing. It wasn’t the first time I’d had two women working to remove my clothing, and it wasn’t the first time the Goddess had helped me out of my clothes. But this was the first time for Alta, who couldn’t even see the Goddess, but only the results of what she was doing to me.
She actually stepped back and watched as the last of my underthings slid down my legs. I, of course, could feel the hands of the Goddess, and I could see her, but to Alta, I imagine it looked like magic.
She laughed again and then closed the distance. We kissed, and touched, the Goddess at my back, also kissing, also touching. And it took almost nothing, almost nothing at all, before I was entirely enflamed, and Alta as well.
“Put her there,” said the Goddess, pointing to the altar. And so I scooped my surprised wife in my arms and set her on the altar.
And then I did the things the Goddess told me to do. And as I did so, the Goddess filled me, and I filled Alta, and from the three of us, dimly, I could feel everyone in the Heart of the Goddess, filled with love and joy of the Goddess.
* * * *
“Wow,” Alta said, quiet some time later. “Why don’t we do this every time we’re here?”
I opened my eyes. I still felt filled, although when I looked around, the Goddess was gone. I dimly remembered when she left us, telling me how happy I made her, and promising such promises.
“That is a good question,” I said.