And I’d wanted it so desperately.
Wanted him.
That I hadn’t even thought of the repercussions.
He was my roommate!
I couldn’t just sleep with my roommate.
Not to mention the fact that he was next in line for a mafia throne, and that made him just as much of a target as I was.
I sucked in a breath.
My father could never know.
My family could never know.
Not that it mattered, did it? They’d all but abandoned me, sacrificed me on the family altar the minute they dropped me off at college and basically told me to survive.
I took a deep breath and tried to process my tumultuous feelings, the distress at having the sexiest guy on the planet in my bed — in my room.
The reality that he’d done things to me that I’d never even thought possible — that his dirty talking mouth was relentless in its pursuit to taste every inch of me.
But what about a few hours from now?
When darkness left.
I chewed my lower lip as my gaze fell to the white horse sitting on my nightstand. I didn’t know why, but some part of me expected him to take the marker away — the reminder of what happened to rats — to those who betrayed him and those closest to him.
I reached for it just as Dom turned over onto his back and opened his eyes.
“You done thinking?” His golden chest was all muscle and perfection as he put his hands behind his head and grinned wide. “Seriously you were giving me a headache.”
My voice caught in my throat before I answered in a gravelly voice. “Sorry.”
“Come here,” he whispered without moving.
I crawled across his body and pressed my chin to his chest, he was still naked. I could feel every inch of his skin burn beneath mine.
He tensed for maybe two seconds before very slowly bringing his hands to my shoulders and squeezing, and then he was lifting me closer to him. My body slid against the hard lines of his stomach as his mouth found mine, and then I was lost again to the sensations only he could bring as he flipped me onto my back and made me forget all the reasons I was worried.
Kiss, after relentless kiss, I lost a little bit more of my heart to him, and when his eyes darkened with need, when his crazed expression locked on mine, I knew I had him.
That was all that mattered.
I had him.
For now.
It was all I needed.
“Don’t close your eyes,” he urged, filing me completely. “I want to see you. Always want to see you.”
Lost again.
To my enemy.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Dom
I watched her sleep.
Like a psycho.
I even took a picture of the way her hand fell against her cheek, making it even worse, when she inhaled so loudly I had to turn on my side and pretend be asleep.
She.
Was.
Everything.
All the things I shouldn’t want.
All the things I didn’t need.
I sighed.
Like a chick.
Then I grabbed the white horse and tucked it in my pocket. My lips lingered around her right temple then finally made the choice for me as my mouth lowered and touched her smooth skin.
What the hell was I doing?
I asked myself that every time I bent and pressed my lips her ear, her chin, the soft spot on her neck, and even the corner of her mouth.
And every time… she inhaled and fell into a deeper sleep.
I watched her eyes.
The way they were closed and yet still so focused.
I thought about the lies, the betrayal, the things said and unsaid, and then I did a very dangerous thing.
I wondered.
I hoped.
I wanted.
What if.
What. Freaking. If.
What if she wasn’t her blood?
What if she was different?
Better?
I wanted that for her so bad.
I quickly shook my head then went to the shower, the very non-co-ed shower, as I vigorously washed my body then found at least two girls waiting for me with a towel.
“Thanks.” I grabbed my own, nodded my head, and went on my merry way as two disappointed freshmen scowled in my direction, and just when I thought things couldn’t get more complicated, I opened the door.
To a naked roommate.
Oh, she had a towel.
Wrapped around her waist.
But her breasts.
Free of any sort of covering.
I gawked.
Shut the door harder than necessary.
Gawked more.
Then counted my lucky stars as she crooked her fingers to me, beckoning me, calling me to her body, devouring me with her mouth.
My lips embraced her again.
And I lied.
I lied to myself.
I told myself it was okay.
Another quick break.
Me and her.
Her and me.
Our forever.
How short it may be.
Our.
Sad.
Freaking.
Lie.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Tanit
I must have fallen back asleep. My body ached in all the right places, and before I even opened my eyes, I was grinning.
I still tasted him on my tongue, felt the imprint of his fingertips on my skin.
With a yawn, I stretched my arms above my head and looked to the empty spot on my bed, frowning as my gaze flew to his bed.
Empty.
His things were still scattered around his side of the room.
But Dom was nowhere to be found.
I remembered him coming back in from a shower, water dripping from his dark hair. I’d never been so amazed at male beauty, the way he carried himself with such power, the way his eyes held mine with such longing.
It was as if the rest of the world faded away.
As cheesy as that sounded.
I felt safe in my enemy’s arms.
And I wanted to spend an eternity trying to figure out why.
But he was gone.
I slowly threw the covers off my legs as a chill hit my body. I checked the screen on my phone.
I had class in less than an hour.
With a squeak, I ran around the room like a mad woman and was able to get ready with five minutes to spare. I snatched my room keys and phone from the table and froze when I noticed the white horse was missing.
Was that a good thing or bad thing?
That it was gone?
That he’d been the one to take it?
What was this? He slept with me, and then I’m no longer a threat?
Or worse.
He took everything.
Walked out of my life.
And left me without protection.
Panic seized my lungs.
No. I refused to believe it. Last night was different. The way he touched me, cared for me… it wasn’t fake.
He wasn’t capable of being that good of an actor.
I rubbed my chest with my hand and slowly walked out of the room to the elevator.
I swiped my key card across the pad and frowned when the elevator didn’t work.
Then tried again.
“Need some help?” came a familiar male voice.
I froze as more panic washed over my body like a bucket of ice water.
“No.” I didn’t turn around.
“Looks like you could use some.” He came up around me and scanned a black card over the pad. When the elevator doors opened, he motioned for me to get in.
The hall was empty.
Nobody was going to save me but me.
I gulped and took a step inside as he followed.
And as I assumed, the minute the doors closed, he stalled the elevator, his crystal blue eyes raked over me for a few seconds before
he leaned back against the wall and crossed his arms. “He likes you.”
“Who?” I played dumb. I wasn’t good at it.
Nixon’s lips curled into a mocking grin. “Pain in my ass, adopted son, heir to the Campisi throne, about this tall,” He held out his hand. “Has no self-control and likes flirting with the enemy — apples rarely fall that far from their trees.” He cursed and bit down on his lip.
Nixon terrified me.
It was in the way he held himself.
I couldn’t read him. One minute he was smiling the next I was staring into the face of a ruthless killer, his eyes penetrated, and his stance was always one of attack.
“Dom.” I hung my head.
“The very one. See? You’re better at this than you thought.” Nixon sneered, “He’s the only reason, Tanit De Lange.”
I sucked in a breath, but I still couldn’t breathe; it felt like a thousand pounds were crushing my wind pipe as Nixon sauntered toward me, pinning me against the wall with his body. “The only damn reason I’m not putting a bullet through your brain. Tell me I’m not being an idiot by asking him to protect you. Tell me I’m not setting him up to die just because you think he’s good in bed.”
Tears filled my eyes. “Our apples.” I gulped. “They tend to fall extremely far from the tree… as in, a different continent, but it doesn’t change the fact that I’m still an apple, does it?”
Nixon sighed and leaned back. “And those apples… do they have plans to ask you to join them back at the tree?”
“Not yet. No.” I exhaled.
“And when they do?”
“I — I don’t know. They won’t. They sent me here in enemy territory. Do you really think they care about me that much?”
“Why?” Nixon whispered. “You should be asking yourself why… why send a defenseless girl into an enemy’s hands? I’m surprised you haven’t already figured it out. Hell, I’m surprised they didn’t pin a welcome card to your sweater and throw you a party.”
“What are you talking about?” I grit my teeth. “They abandoned me!”
“No, sweetheart…” He pushed the elevator button again as it started its slow descent. “They’re baiting us, baiting the next in line with a pretty little package, and we’ve already played into their hands. Trust me, it won’t happen again. I’ll be assigning someone else to you. Your time with Dom is finished.”
When the doors opened, a man in jeans and a leather jacket was waiting for me with an easy smile on his face.
Nixon didn’t even look at him, just walked right past.
And joined Dom.
My Dom.
The one who had held me.
Who had kissed my tears away.
He’d removed the white horse.
Because he’d removed himself.
He stared through me and then very slowly turned on his heel and followed Nixon to a waiting black Escalade.
I waited for him to hop out.
To tell me it was all a joke.
To confess his love.
His need.
Instead, I felt hands at my arm. “Tanit, you have class.”
Tears filled my eyes as I numbly started walking out the door. “Who are you?”
“Married. With one kid and another on the way.” He joked, and then sobered. “Thirty-two years old, with a few kills to my name, Scorpio, and avid soccer fan.” He put on his sunglasses. “And at night, I think about all the reasons I do what I do — and count them with the smiles on my family’s faces, so my suggestion for you is to keep your head down and get an education, before your life is cut too short to enjoy it.” He smirked, “All right, so, biology?”
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Dom
I wasn’t sure what was worse. Watching her from her bedroom, in a bed across from her, lusting.
Or getting glimpses of her via text from Ax.
Every time he sent me a picture of her, I wanted to crush my phone in my hand, and every single time he told me about the people who ignored her in class, I wanted to maim every student on campus.
Violent did not even begin to cover it.
She had no friends.
She’d had me.
And I was gone.
I rubbed my thumb over the white horse in my hand then chucked it across the room.
“Ah, the amount of times that horse has been thrown.” Phoenix joined me in the living room and handed me a glass of wine. “You doing okay?”
Dark circles. Always the dark circles under his eyes, and the ever-present darkness around his body, like he’d finally just accepted it and lived in harmony with every demon who refused to leave his side.
Phoenix was never the same after that night.
Dante refused to talk about it still.
It was our secret to keep.
Our Hell to live with.
I just wished I knew more of the backstory, why the guys went above and beyond, why their trust was so skewed.
Hell, they didn’t even trust the mailman, and the guy was eighty and had a lazy eye; he even brought the mail to the door in the snow.
“Stop thinking about it.” Phoenix shrugged. “No amount of thinking will make it better. No amount of analyzing. What’s done is done. Move on. The boss, your boss, made a judgment call. Accept it.”
“Not my boss.” I said through clenched teeth.
Phoenix’s smile was cruel. “Until Tex dies, steps down, or you kill him — you’ve been put under the Nicolasi house. Disrespect Nixon again and I’ll be forced to shoot someone else I actually like.”
I scowled. “You like me too much to make it fatal.”
“Probably.” He shrugged. “But I can make it hurt.”
I gulped. Yeah, I knew how he worked. Ever since… ten years ago, when I was still eleven and stupid and trying to find my way in a world that had abandoned me, he and the guys had enveloped themselves in a sort of darkness that never left. And they’d forced me to breathe in that same air, become part of that same hatred for a bloodline that dared turn on its own.
I stared down at my hands. “She isn’t them.”
“Famous last words. This probably isn’t the place for this conversation but listen up. We have kids, families. We need to protect them. Bringing her in, even if she is innocent, only brings their attention. There isn’t a way to protect her without ending her life. You would have to make her your blood. She would have to go through the ceremony.”
My gut churned.
Another thing they’d changed.
When people entered into the fold.
They suffered to prove their blood.
Blood, after all, was always spilled.
Always.
Because blood was the only true thing in our lives.
“I would never make her go through torture just so I could have her.”
“Well.” He shrugged. “Then I don’t know what to tell you, except, sometimes it’s easier if you’re the one torturing.”
I gaped at him. “You can’t be serious!”
“How much do you want her?”
That was all he said before he finished his wine and patted me on the shoulder. “Think about it. Know there will always be a place within my Family if you decide this is what you want. Nixon would accept this.”
It was insanity.
Even contemplating it.
The suffering she would endure.
To be mine.
To be part of us.
To gain protection.
“Heard the conversation.” I knew the voice. I closed my eyes. She was beautiful, not mine, not that I’d ever wanted her in the first place, but it was hard not to stare. I didn’t even like uttering her name because it pissed Him off, and that was the last thing I wanted to do. “What are you going to do, Dom?”
I sighed. “I don’t have a clue.”
“Life is measured in these choices. Don’t take it lightly. You choose for both of you, and that choice can’t be undone.” Sadness etched across L
uc’s face like she was carrying my burden when I’d never asked her to, but that was what she did for Chase, for everyone who let her. She was a light. And we all loved her for it.
That’s what she always did.
“Thank you.”
“Anytime.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Tanit
Bored, I watched the rain pelt my window. Ax had gone back to the compound or whoever the heck he went at night while campus was on lockdown, leaving me by myself in my room and ready to pull my own hair out.
My heart ached.
And my fear was that it would never get better.
My father didn’t contact me.
I had absolutely no one in this life.
Why did I even exist?
I tried to push away the dark thoughts. I’d even tried focusing on school, but nothing worked — I saw his face every time.
The lights flickered in my dorm room.
I quickly grabbed my cell and turned on my flash light just as everything went black.
“Don’t freak out,” I said to calm myself. “It’s just a storm.” Tears blurred my eyes when I realized all I wanted to do was call Dom. I wanted my enemy to rescue me.
Save me.
Love me.
I hugged myself as the tears streamed.
Something sounded in the hall. I turned to my door just as the knob moved, a figure in black walked in, I stumbled back against my bed and dropped my cell to the floor face down just as something hard hit me in the cheek.
And all I saw was darkness.
When I woke up, I was in a dark room. There was no light, and it was freezing. The metal chair dug into my body making it impossible to get comfortable, and my hands were tied behind the metal. Already I could feel my tender wrists bruising.
I bit against the gag in my mouth. I wanted water so bad I could cry.
I screamed.
It was muffled.
The sound of a door opening and closing jolted me in my seat, but everywhere I saw there was black.
Black everything.
My eyes burned with the need to make out the shape that walked in. He was tall.
He moved directly in front of me.
I started to shake.
And then the blade of a knife came into contact with my throat.
I was going to die today.
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