It was a hoarse whisper.
It sounded painful to bite out, like his mouth burned to admit it.
I waited as Dom wrapped a tighter arm around me, covering me with half of his body, shielding me from family, from danger.
“Then trust me to see this out the way it needs to be done. We don’t condemn the innocent, I’d like to think that out of everyone I love, out of everyone I would die for — you would get that simple fact. I promise you, if she betrays us, if blood wins out, I’ll cheerfully cut her heart out and hand it over.”
A shudder rippled through me. I actually believed him.
And Chase must have too.
He put the knife away and shook his head. “Tex better watch his back, you bloodthirsty bastard.”
Dom cracked a smile.
Chase full on laughed.
And I suddenly felt like I’d just been pranked.
But when Chase’s eyes met mine, the smile was gone, the laughter replaced with disdain. “I hope you’re better than your blood.”
“Me too,” I whispered, unsure of what else to do.
He nodded at me, patted Dom on the shoulder like they were frat boys and walked off.
I would have slumped to the ground had Dom not caught me and held me steady. “Are you okay?”
“No,” I admitted honestly. “Would you be? Never mind, that’s a stupid question, you’re a—” I didn’t say it, though it was on the tip of my tongue.
“Killer?” he offered.
“No,” I lied. “I just meant… you’re different.”
“Different doesn’t mean I don’t experience common human emotion.” He smirked.
I shivered in his arms a bit and then watched Chase’s retreating form. “He’s the scariest of them all.”
Dom hesitated then followed my gaze. “Would you believe me if I told you, this is him when he’s acting tame?”
My eyes widened automatically. “Tell me that’s your idea of a joke?”
“I wish.” Even Dom appeared uncomfortable, and maybe if I looked a little further into his eyes… afraid. “The guy’s been through a lot, seen a lot. He’s… well let’s just say nobody would ever look forward to fighting him, because I’m not sure I know anyone who would win, at least not now, not with the passion he has to survive, not with the debt he feels he needs to pay.”
“Debt?” I pried.
“He swore to wipe out a blood line — he means to see it through.”
Dread trickled down my spine. “Which blood line?”
Dom hesitated and then whispered, “Yours.”
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Dom
Fear washed over her face with such chilling impact she swayed on her feet and then jerked her head to the side as Chase’s form retreated and finally got into a slick black Mercedes.
He wasn’t alone.
I smiled.
Good thing someone kept him in check.
“What?” Tanit asked. “What’s funny?”
I glanced back at the car as it sped off and full on laughed, “Ah, that’s a story for another time. One of the best ones I’ve heard. Kinda wish I’d been around to experience it.”
Her eyes flickered away from mine before she looked down at the ground, her shoulders hunched, her body looking more frail than I’d ever seen it.
“You mean it, don’t you?” She hugged her body tight. “You’d cut out my heart.”
She didn’t say it like a question. It was a complete statement, one I didn’t feel the need to answer.
“You already know what the answer is, Tanit.” I shrugged. “You know this life. You could be the love of my life, the very air I breathe, my whole existence, and if you betrayed me — they’d still demand your head.” I gritted my teeth. “It wasn’t always this way.”
“But it is now.” She sighed.
“Before…” I scratched my head, trying to think of a way to explain. “Before there were no kids, no extra lives, no souls running around needing protection. Things change when kids are involved, Tanit. They can’t stay the same, not when you’ve been given that sort of responsibility.”
She had the most curious look as she bit down on her lip and then put her hands on her hips. “That, at least makes sense.”
“See? The mafia isn’t all bad.”
She rolled her eyes. “You’ve got a really screwed up way of deciding what’s good and bad.”
I laughed then reached for her hand and squeezed. “Good?”
She nodded.
I tugged her against my chest and captured her lips, and then sucked until I could taste her, until I felt the warmth of her tongue slide against my lower lip. I drew back. “Good. And yet still bad, because it’s not something I should do. Good and bad always depend on where you’re standing, Tanit. Remember that.”
I released her and nodded toward the dorm. “Let’s skip class.”
“You’re a bad influence.”
“Thank you.” I winked.
“That wasn’t a compliment.”
I reached for her hand then let my own fall by my side. I was creating too much of an emotional bond. I used to think I was the kind of guy who could kill a nice old grandma in cold blood if she double-crossed me.
And now?
Now, I was slowly beginning to realize the only reason I’d been under the assumption I was a bad ass was because my kills had always been strangers.
I’d never been put in a position where I had to choose blood over my heart.
And it terrified me that it was coming.
That my life all came down to one single choice.
Me. Or them.
I didn’t want it to be like that.
I didn’t know how it could be any other way.
And because the universe was shoving me toward a path I didn’t want, my phone vibrated in my hand.
I highlighted the text and read.
BACKGROUND WIPED — HER FATHER IS ONE OF THE DE LANGE ASSOCIATES WHO RAN — RUSSIANS HAVE HIM AS KILL ON CONTACT. DAUGHTER LIVED WITH HIM HER WHOLE LIFE. NO CHANCE IN HELL SHE KNOWS NOTHING. SHE’S SEEN SOMETHING. SHE’LL BETRAY HIM. BREAK HER. KEEP HER ALIVE. —NIXON
I crunched the phone in my hand. Shit.
“Everything okay?” Tanit pulled her hair into a ponytail sending erotic images of tugging it free throughout my brain and already hard body.
“You’re really pretty.” I meant it. But the compliment made me feel dirty, made the whole situation feel wrong.
She blushed. “You hit your head or something back there?”
I rolled my eyes. “All right, personal bodyguard says you should change into something comfortable, eat junk food, and make fun of Twilight.”
She gasped.
I glared.
“Kidding, I’m totally on board with that. I’ve never really been much of a skipper.”
“Shocked,” I said dryly. “Probably got straight A’s and perfect attendance.”
She shrugged like it wasn’t big deal.
I swiped my key card over the pad, letting us into the elevator. The doors closed, and she met my eyes.
“My dad wasn’t very…” She swallowed. “…forgiving when it came to bad grades and skipping.”
She started rubbing her arms. She was fidgety.
“Did that bastard beat you?” I hissed.
“No.” She took a deep breath. “But sometimes words hurt just as much, you know? He yelled. A lot. And it caused him and my mom to fight, and then he tended to take it out on her so I just… tried to be perfect.”
“Must be exhausting.” I reached for her.
She grabbed my hand. “You have no idea.”
It was an in.
The perfect timing.
I was literally given this girl on a silver platter.
I needed to strike.
Family.
Blood.
Tanit was just another girl.
Another job.
I kissed the top of her head. “Don’t tempt me, Tani
t.”
“Tempt you?”
“Bet you’re a virgin, bet you’ve never stayed out past midnight, bet you’ve never slept with a guy in your bed, bet you’ve never let him touch you.” I grazed her breasts with my knuckles as her breath hitched. “Bet you’d let me.”
“That’s a lot of betting.” She gulped.
The elevator doors opened.
We walked in silence to the room.
I opened the door, she followed after me.
And when she reached for the lights, I pushed her hand out of the way and whispered against her mouth. “Don’t.”
She pulled away slightly. “What are you doing?”
“What I do best. Making good girls go bad,” I teased. “And making you forget all the bad that went with the good. See, told you… good, bad, it all depends on where you’re standing, and from my vantage point…” I eyed her up and down, her full breasts, her kissable mouth the way her lips were slightly parted as short breaths escaped. “All I see is good. So much damn good.”
“I bet.”
I laughed at her teasing, even though I could tell she was nervous.
“I’m going to make you wish this place had only one bed, Tanit. You gonna let me?”
A single nod.
I was going to burn in Hell.
At least Chase would be with me.
Right along with every member of my family.
We weren’t good.
We just told ourselves we were.
How else can you sleep at night? When you have blood on your hands and a Glock under your pillow?
I took her lips.
And knew, I would take it all.
Her innocence.
Hear heart.
Her soul.
And she’d give it freely.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Tanit
I knew I was breathing because I hadn’t passed out yet. No spots appeared in my line of vision — at least what I could see in the darkened room.
I felt his breath on my neck, his hands digging into my arms as he slowly pushed me toward my bed.
I should have dug my heels in the floor.
Told him that I didn’t trust him enough with my secrets to even think about giving him my body.
But he made me feel something other than terror.
I was still afraid of him — but more afraid of my reaction to him — was it normal to want the very man you know without a doubt would kill you in your sleep if you betrayed him?
How was he any different from the rest of them?
From my father?
I didn’t have time to think beyond that simple fact, and then he was turning me in his arms, tilting my chin toward his face, sighing against my neck, inhaling me like he’d never smelled perfume before, or maybe just my skin, and then pressing an open-mouthed kiss against my hammering pulse.
“Tanit,” Dom whispered.
“Y-yes.”
“Are you afraid?”
“Maybe.”
He released me. “Do you trust me?”
“I want to.”
“Good.” He seemed pleased with that answer.
Maybe he was just pleased that I wasn’t spouting lies, for what woman in her right mind would say that they weren’t terrified in his dominating presence?
“All right, good girl.” His dark chuckle made goose bumps erupt up and down my arms, he ran his fingers down my bare skin, his predatory grin widening. “Tell me something I should know…”
I frowned. “I um, I don’t, know?”
“Uh-huh.” He captured my lips between his without warning, his hands sliding to my hips and pulling me against him so hard I gasped in his mouth. He deepened the kiss, causing my legs to nearly buckle as his tongue dipped in my mouth, teased me and taunted with a retreat, only to come back again and tempt me beyond all reason. “Tell me something…” The words buzzed against my mouth. “Important.”
“My curfew was eight.”
He paused and then, “At night?”
“No, in the morning.” I shoved his chest a bit. “Yes, at night.”
He gripped both of my hands and pressed them against his chest, and then lowered until they gripped the front of his jeans. “Explore, Tanit, I don’t mind, seems we have a lifetime of curfews to make up for.”
“What makes you think I wanted to be out doing… things?” I couldn’t even say it. Yeah, I was an embarrassment to college freshman everywhere!
“Because…” His tongue swiped my lower lip. “You taste like danger.”
I almost laughed out loud. “I’m not dangerous.”
He sighed as if I was being ridiculous, and then we were kissing again, his hands left my hips as they inched my shirt over my head. He tossed the button up to the hard wood ground with a loud smack, like he was angry, like the shirt offended him. And then his hands were on my uniform skirt. His fingers gripped the zipper and then the skirt fell to the floor faster than I expected, making the cool air rip through my skin.
My tights were next.
And I was letting him.
Letting him strip every inch of clothing away from me as I stood there watching his eyes burn hotter and more intense.
And then that icy gaze was back on my face, as he brought my hands to his jeans and tilted his head. “I said explore. Are you just going to stand there?”
“I have no idea what I’m doing.”
“Oh.” He licked his lips, and then gripped my hips with his hands as he slowly ran a thumb across my black underwear and then dipped that same thumb inside. “You will.”
I gave my head a shake as he lifted me into his arms and kissed me again, not allowing me to breathe in anything but him.
Dom, Dom, Dom.
My entire body hummed with his taste, his dominance, and when I felt the back of my own mattress against my legs, I opened my eyes to see something I didn’t expect in his eyes.
Guilt.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Dom
I had her where I wanted her.
And I wanted her everywhere.
I was a man who knew my own mind.
My own boundaries.
Control had been bred into me before I even knew the entire alphabet — it was expected.
Demanded.
She made me want to throw it all away.
To forget why I was there.
And just focus on the curve of her neck, the soft sighs coming from her mouth, the way her lips parted, opening for me as she waited for me to make my next move.
I wanted to take it all.
Everything she had to offer.
My heart pounded against my chest as I leaned down for another kiss, as my hand slid up her ribs and cupped a perfect breast.
When I swallowed her moan, I felt a mixture of unrelenting lust — and guilt.
So much damn guilt.
Because no matter how many times I convinced myself what I was doing was okay, I still knew that my motives were about me, about my family, and about what she knew.
She reached for me, tugging me closer, beckoning with a look of wonder in her eyes as she scraped her nails down my chest.
And just as I was about to say screw it all, and take her, sink into her and claim her — my eyes landed on the white horse.
The one sitting on her nightstand.
I froze.
My body went completely numb as memories washed over me right along with the stories of warning.
Of betrayal.
I couldn’t do that to her.
Be that to her.
I jerked away and stood.
“Dom?” She frowned, her face confused. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I lied, doing a quick circle and then facing the door again so I wouldn’t get even more tempted then I already was. My dick was completely on board with jumping back on the bed and finishing the job.
My heart on the other hand.
My freaking conscience.
I ran my hands through m
y hair then tugged it. “Shit.”
“Dom?” Her voice wavered, like she was afraid, like it was my fault she was afraid — again.
“Yeah.” I didn’t turn around.
But I felt her.
Oh, I felt her as she stood and wrapped her arms around my middle and kissed my back so tenderly that I wanted to scream with the injustice of it all.
Of finding someone that made me feel more like me — only to pretend to be someone else for them.
I hung my head as she jumped on one of my only weaknesses.
Touch.
Care.
I was the object of parents who’d rather see me dead.
Of friends who would rather stab me and challenge me than offer me a high five.
Placed in a family that loved me — but weren’t really mine.
Not really.
All this time, I thought I was the one attacking, probing, infiltrating.
Until she touched me.
And my heart clenched.
Until she kissed me, and my breathing hitched.
Until she turned me around in her arms and claimed my mouth with such unrestrained passion — that I forgot it all.
The mafia.
The plan.
Her place in the world.
And when our clothes were discarded to the floor, when I inched into her, when I moaned her name as she gripped me tight — I told myself that it was going to be okay.
Even as she moved with me, a tear sliding down her cheek.
Even as her legs tightened around me.
I told myself it was different.
This was different.
Not betrayal.
And when she cried out against my mouth, her gorgeous head falling back against the pillow as I filled her more.
I admitted.
I was selfish.
And I would burn in Hell.
But I would remember this for an eternity.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Tanit
My eyes burned like I’d just cried for days. I rubbed them with the back of my palm and jolted up in bed.
Dom was still sleeping, his face harshly beautiful as his body remained motionless, his even breathing had my eyes gazing at his sculpted chest. I shivered, remembering the way his kisses felt pressed against my body. His hands had touched me everywhere.
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