Through Thick & Thin

by Natasha D Frazier

  She’d chosen her outfit and carefully laid it on the bed. She would wear a camel-colored empire-waist dress that stopped just above the knee to match her newly purchased Steve Madden pumps. She primped in the mirror a while longer than needed. She was consumed by thoughts of where her marriage was headed. Was she really able to get past everything that happened? The deceit. The lies. She had to give it one more shot before calling it quits.

  Chloe fingered her short curls after spraying on a touch of Rico’s favorite perfume, Cashmere Mist, a part of last year’s anniversary gift. She stood to get dressed, but his presence kept her from moving toward the bed. He didn’t say anything and she didn’t turn around, but she felt him in the room long before she smelled his Armani cologne.

  Dressed in a red and brown plaid blazer, complemented with a red long-sleeved buttoned-down shirt, jeans, and loafers, Rico stood about five feet away from her drinking in her beauty with his eyes. How could he not have appreciated her before? Tonight he was hoping to change that. He was taking her to the Improv Comedy Club; that was where they went on their first date. Laughs were always good for the soul and he hoped that would get her reminiscing on how things used to be between them and how they could be that way again. Even better. They only needed to try. Harder.

  He inched closer to her and placed his hands on either side of her shoulders and caressed them. He felt her stiffen under his touch and again he was disappointed. It was their anniversary, after all. He had hoped his efforts of marriage counseling, catering to all of her needs and giving her more attention than he ever thought he could give would have been enough. Instead, he constantly found himself coming up short when it came to receiving anything in return from her.

  “I’ll wait for you in the living room, honey,” Rico said softly against her ear before caressing it with a tender kiss. He walked out of the room without waiting for a response from her.

  Chloe exhaled when she heard his footsteps on the wooden stairwell. She didn’t realize that she had been holding her breath ever since she felt his hands on her body. I have to stop doing that, she chastised herself. She knew that he was feeling rejected. But how did he think he made her feel when that woman showed up at the coffee shop carrying his child?

  She pulled on her dress and fidgeted with it until she slid the zipper into position. Trying to get that zipper up had always put a strain on her arms, but she managed to get the job done alone. She slipped into her shoes and turned around in front of the mirror, giving her clothes, makeup and hair a once-over before meeting Rico downstairs.

  Rico let out a low whistle as Chloe descended the stairs with her matching camel-colored clutch under her arm. She was beautiful and he made sure she knew it.

  “I’m the luckiest man in the world to have you on my arm tonight. You look beautiful, sweetie,” Rico complimented as he took her hand when she descended to the last three steps. When she made it to the bottom, he lifted her hand and brushed her wedding band with his fingers before planting a kiss on her hand.

  “Thank you.” Chloe blushed a little and returned the compliment. “You look nice, too.” She noticed that he was wearing her favorite cologne as well, but didn’t make mention of it. Rico placed her hand around his arm and escorted her to the car. Their drive to the Improv was filled with chatter from Rico about what they did on previous anniversaries. She didn’t add much to the conversation, only nodded and smiled mostly. She had to admit that those times were nice, but this one was much different. In her mind was the insurmountable obstacle in front of them.

  Rico had purchased their tickets online so they walked straight past the ticket booth to the entrance, where they were greeted by a hostess and shown to their VIP table near the stage. Noting the dim lighting, soft R&B music and the newly renovated facility, Chloe remembered their first date at the Improv, where they saw the comedian Arnez J in standup. They laughed until their stomachs and throats were in pain. She was hoping she would get another whiff of that tonight, although she didn’t know who the comedian was going to be. She just knew that she could use a laugh right about now. And not just any laugh, but a magic laugh that would take away all of the pain that she was feeling and trying so hard to push aside. The type of laughter that would somehow wipe the slate clean for the two of them. She was sure there was no such thing, but she was ready for the magic she hoped the night would bring for her.

  She ordered a Caesar salad and he ordered buffalo wings to enjoy before the show started. On cue, the show began when the waitress came to take away their empty plates. They were tickled a little by the warm-up acts but nothing like what she was waiting for. However, she was feeling more relaxed and her body didn’t stiffen as it did earlier when Rico pulled her chair closer to his and put his arm around her.

  There were still a few residual laughs from the crowd as the host appeared onstage to announce the headliner for the night—Will the Thrill. Chloe didn’t recognize the comedian’s stage name, so she knew she hadn’t heard any of his jokes before. New material. Great.

  Will the Thrill jumped straight into his routine after the round of applause subsided. His first joke was about dating and how he wasn’t ready to commit to his girlfriend by getting married.

  “C’mon now men. Y’all know how much extra work it is to hide the side woman when you get married. Gotta put all these codes in your phone, use aliases and lie, lie, lie. Even when you get caught, stick to the lie. Ain’t that right my man?” he joked as he gestured toward Rico.

  Her anticipation waned at those jokes. In fact, they weren’t funny at all. Bad choice in her mind. What began to tick her off was that Rico was doubled over in laughter . . . clearly, something he shouldn’t have been laughing at given the situation they were in.

  “What in the hell is so funny, Rico?” she sneered, leaning to the side to look up at him wiping tears from his eyes.

  “What?” Rico asked, clearly confused.

  “So cheating is funny?”

  “Sweetie, these are just jokes. C’mon now.”

  “I’m glad you think ruining our marriage and our lives is funny. I’m getting out of here!” Chloe scooted away from the table, snatched her purse and walked away with Rico following close behind.

  “Looks like someone got caught doing what I just said not to do!” the comedian joked to their retreating backs as they exited the room, causing an uproar in the crowd.

  Rico grabbed her hand and she spun around. She yanked her hand back and folded her arms across her chest. The look she gave would have killed him if looks could kill. Infidelity was a sore spot with her and definitely not a laughing matter. Rico couldn’t understand why she took it so seriously. Everyone in the room, except her, knew that those were only jokes. There was no reason to get upset over nothing. But to Chloe it wasn’t nothing; it was the reason her life was turned upside down.

  CHAPTER 2

  Nearly two weeks had gone by since their anniversary-date disaster, and Chloe had thought more and more about the state of their relationship. It seemed as if Rico was the only one who had moved past his infidelity. He admitted he cheated and gave up his parental rights to his child, but he seemed to want to act as though it had never happened. He had never expressed remorse, and he hadn’t given any promise it would never happen again or made any plans to act differently in the future. He just wanted to forget about it, and have her do so too. As for her, she had a long way to go, if she were to ever get past their issues. She’d tried and she just wasn’t ready.

  “Rico, I don’t love you,” Chloe confessed with a duffle bag slain across one shoulder and another latched onto her rolling suitcase. And she silently added, not the way that a wife should. She knew that she promised to love him forever on their wedding day, but he was the one who forgot or at least chose to neglect the promise he made to her. And for that, she felt like she rightfully had a reason to end their marriage. Truth be told, it was over the moment he started seeing other women. And if there was any salvaging their marriage, that
notion was over when he impregnated Raegan.

  “Y-you c-c-can’t be s-serious,” Rico stammered, lifting his head from his palms to see his wife walking toward the door with her luggage.

  Chloe paused mid-stride, astonished that Rico found it surprising that she was leaving. Although Raegan lost Rico’s baby, there were so many other reasons why she and Rico could not be together. No trust. No love. Only lies.

  Rico raced over to her and placed his hands on the luggage handle. She had to give him another chance to make this right.

  “Please don’t go; I know we can work this out, baby, please. Just please give us another chance . . . please.” His voice was beginning to strain as he fought to choke back the tears and the wave of emotion that threatened to overtake him, as the reality of their situation set in. She was about to leave him.

  Turning slightly to face him, Chloe glared, her eyes cold. “It’s funny that you think of this now. Where was all of this passion for our relationship when you were with another woman?” Chloe dared him to answer.

  Rico remained silent with his hands holding her luggage. He knew there was no answer that he could give right now that would right this wrong.

  “See there? That’s exactly what I thought. Please remove your hands from my luggage or be helpful and put it in the trunk,” Chloe snarled. She glanced down at her suitcase as if she had some sort of superpower to remove his hands.

  Rico dropped his hands from the handle and Chloe opened one of his hands to place her keys inside. He was a gentleman by all means, but there was no way he was going to stand there and help his wife leave him.

  Without another word, Chloe shifted the luggage so that she wouldn’t drop anything, opened the door and went to her car. Rico had to try once more, so he followed her through the front door to the driveway.

  “Where are you going?” Rico pleaded.

  “Never mind that; I will be back for the rest of my things at a later time. Please do not contact me. I really just need to be away from you.”

  “For how long?” Rico asked, hoping that her need to get away was temporary.

  “I can’t say whether it’s a week, a month or forever. . . . I just need some time.” Saying those words out loud brought her some relief. She had to break free.

  Rico felt defeated. He stood there with his head low, shoulders slumped, hands in pockets, watching as his wife packed her things into her car to possibly leave his life forever.

  Chloe watched Rico in the rearview mirror as she drove off. Her heart broke for him as she saw him standing in the driveway. He looked dejected. However, the sadness she felt for him did nothing for the heartbreak she was experiencing. For the life of her, she just couldn’t understand how he could do something like that to her, after all they had gone through. She had always been there for him and made sure she gave him special attention when she wasn’t at work.

  She was planning to spend a few weeks with a friend before she rented an apartment, but she got the feeling that she really needed to get away. Away from Houston. As far away from Rico as possible so that she could think.

  She’d only told him she didn’t love him to hurt his feelings. Although she couldn’t say without a shadow of a doubt that she didn’t love him, she also couldn’t say that she still loved him. She was caught somewhere in between.

  Rico stood in the driveway for thirty minutes hoping that Chloe would turn the car around, but she never did. The words of his friend Michael suddenly echoed in his mind. All of his dirt was finally catching up with him and he had no one to blame but himself.

  “Lord, I know You haven’t heard from me in a while,” Rico began to pray as he slowly walked back into the empty house. “But I need You to bring my wife back. I know I’ve done some terrible things to her and I’ve already apologized; I just don’t know what else to do. How can I get her back? I’ve really messed up this time, God, and only You can help me through this. Please Lord. Amen,” Rico ended his prayer the moment he stepped inside the house. He closed the door and slid down on the floor against it, praying again, this time silently.

  His prayer was interrupted by someone knocking on his front door. He quickly jumped up and flung the door open, thinking that God must have answered his prayers and Chloe was back. It was only the mailman dropping off a package that couldn’t fit into their mailbox. He reclaimed his spot on the floor against the door, rubbing his hands behind his head. What am I going to do?

  Read Shattered Vows Now!

  Out of the Shadows (Love, Lies & Consequences Book 4) is available now!

  Chapter 1

  [Note: Some parts of this scene have been removed to prevent spoilers from Shattered Vows (Love, Lies & Consequences Book 3)

  “Five, four, three, two, one! Happy New Year!” Shane and Chloe shouted along with the rest of the congregation. There was hardly a dry eye in the building as the congregation reflected on Pastor’s sermon and shared hugs and high fives with one another—grateful to have made it into the New Year. The choir emotionally sang, “You Made a Way” while the congregation celebrated. Pastor Jacobs had just finished his sermon, titled “Kneel Before You Build,” encouraging parishioners to seek God before creating their New Year goals.

  “No more resolutions because resolutions tend to get tossed to the side after mid-February. Uh-uh, I won’t get any Amens on that. This year, I want each of you to be people of faith. Be intentional about the path that you’re going to take. Set your goals after being led by our Lord. And then take it a step further and create a plan to accomplish those goals. Faith without works is dead—isn’t that right, church?” Pastor Jacobs preached. He went on to encourage his members to bring their plans to church at the end of the month so that he could pray over them.

  Shane wondered what was in store for him and Chloe. To Shane’s dismay, he and Chloe were still only friends. He didn’t want to keep bringing up the situation for fear that Chloe might feel like he was rushing her, but what was he to do? Wait forever? He would move on if someone else even compared to her, but he didn’t believe such a woman existed.

  “What are your plans for this year?” Shane asked during the ride home. She had seemed pretty emotional during the service and all he could do was provide hugs, prayers, and an occasional squeeze of the hand.

  “Hopefully something greater than my past. Honestly, other than tonight, I haven’t prayed about or thought about it much. What about you?”

  Other than taking things a step forward with you? Shane wanted to ask, but instead he answered, “I want to try something different in the force. Something more like a desk job, you know? I’m getting a little older, so I want to settle down. No more chasing bad guys. I’ve been praying that God would provide opportunities for that to happen. So when you think about me, add that to your prayer list.” There were only so many ways that he could tell her that he was ready, and this was yet another way of showing her. He didn’t need her worrying about him too much while he was at work. She’d told him once that she couldn’t live with the thought of knowing he may not come home at night because of his line of work. Now it was something he was ready to change.

  “Of course! That’s great Shane. That’ll be a great move for you.”

  Shane nodded in agreement.

  When he pulled into her driveway, he shut the engine off and for a moment it was silent. He searched for the right words to help her see that they were right for each other and the time was now, or at least soon, for them to decide if their relationship was ever going to go any further.

  “Please be patient with me,” Chloe said as if she could hear Shane’s thoughts. “I know you’ve been doing that, but just give me a little more time.”

  Shane nodded slowly, not sure what direction the conversation was headed. He’d been there for her, just like he said he would. He’d been around to cheer her up, take her out to brighten her spirits, and give her a shoulder to cry on. If she just needed someone to sit with her, he was that person. He wouldn’t change any of
that, because he loved her and wanted to be the person she trusted and relied upon. He just wished that she could see that would never change and that was who he’d always be to her—whatever she needed him to be.

  “You’ve been so amazing to me. I guess what I’m trying to say is my hesitation has nothing to do with you. You know how much I went through; I just want to be sure that I can be the woman you need me to be before we take our relationship further. You need me to be whole,” Chloe said, reaching over to caress his hand.

  “I can understand that. I won’t push too hard,” he said and chuckled softly. His face turned serious before he continued, “But I’m ready . . . lady, I’ve been ready most of my life.”

  “I see that now.” Chloe leaned over and planted a kiss on his cheek. She was grateful for the friend she had in Shane.

  “I won’t keep you any longer. It’s very late.”

  After Shane saw her safely inside, he revved up his engine and drove home, but sat in his driveway for a while, thinking about the conversation he’d just had with Chloe. Years ago he had come to the realization that he and Chloe would never be together, when she grew up and gave her heart to someone else. When she returned home with the news that she was getting a divorce, his hopes were raised, but they were quickly let down again when she told him that she would be devoted to her husband until the very end, no matter what had previously gone on between them. And that left him right where he was now . . . waiting for her to accept him and his love in a way that would lead to their forever. Read now.

  CHAPTER 1

  Delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass. Those were the Scriptures that Kensi had chosen to live by, and her desires were simple: career progression and family. Today she was trusting God to bring one of those to pass. She could feel it in her bones; besides, she’d been positioning herself for this promotion since she was hired eight years ago.