Everybody (Else) Is Perfect
Page 20
I mulled over this while I lay on my couch in the days and then weeks after the acquisition. And in giving my body what it needed, my mind was able to heal, too, and eventually my entire perspective shifted. The future was uncertain, but really, it always had been and always would be. The best I could do was be honest with myself about what I wanted and act on that honesty. Whereas I’d always viewed the timeline of my life as inevitable, as containing events that I passively participated in, I could suddenly see each step of the way as an active choice, one of a series of infinite choices that could lead to infinitely different lives I could live.
I felt a new ownership of my existence, free from the limited definition of power and influence that had so recently defined me. There was a gaping hole in place of what I had thought I should want my life to look like. And in that empty space, there was suddenly room for everything.
Acknowledgments
In March 2018, I got an email from Nicki Richesin with the subject “Your Writing.” She was a literary agent who had been following my career and wondered if I’d considered writing a book. Flipping my hair back and sitting up a little straighter, I wrote her back in minutes: Yes. Of course I had. In fact, I had an ongoing Google Doc full of overwrought notes about what the past few years had been like, and I sent it over to her. She helped me turn it into a book proposal, and without her belief in me, I’m not sure I ever would have had the guts to do it.
This book also wouldn’t have been possible without the editing prowess of Michelle Herrera Mulligan at Atria, who, through long phone calls and kind words of wisdom, did so much more than shape my chapters. It would have ended on a much more superficial note if it weren’t for the way she gently steered me toward self-actualization. Thank you also to Lindsay Sagnette for her early belief in this project (and me), and to Melanie Iglesias Pérez for keeping me on track. And thank you to everyone else at Atria who helped this book come to life.
There are two women mentioned in this book who were alive when I wrote it and died around the time I finished it: Elizabeth Wurtzel, who opened the door for women like me to write this kind of book, and Mama Cax (referenced as a model with a bedazzled prosthetic leg), who ushered in a new era of representation in the fashion industry. I was inspired by them both.
I owe my entire career to the women who took chances on me and advocated for me, a scrappy little lesbian with big opinions: Annie Tomlin, Megan McIntyre, Leila Brillson, Neha Gandhi, Mikki Halpin, and Michelle Lee, all of whom showed me what true leadership means and continued to support me even after they weren’t technically my bosses.
Speaking of which, I never would have had the brain space to write a book if my coworkers hadn’t been the absolute best, and I am forever grateful to the Nylon editorial, video, social media, and art teams, and in particular Kristin Iversen, who set the bar for all of us with her dedication, creativity, and general brilliance.
My closest friends, some new and some old, including but not limited to Lindsey B, Leah, Gabby, Mimi, Amy, Kat, and Moira, who are the coolest, strongest, bravest, smartest people in the world, have supported me through everything, including the writing of this book, during which they took turns listening to me rant about it and assuring me that it was, in fact, a good idea to write it.
My beautiful, brilliant, hilarious sisters Miriam and Julia were the first people I trusted to read this pile of feelings in its rawest state (which is definitely a metaphor). I am forever grateful to them for being my anchors throughout my entire life, but especially during this process. Ultimately I just wanted to write something that my sisters liked.
My mom and dad have been, and continue to be, my biggest cheerleaders. In fact, they’ve always encouraged me to write, and really I owe literally everything to them and the way they’ve consistently supported my generally unconventional trajectories without judgment. I’d be nothing without their consistent love and guidance.
And finally, my sweet, beautiful girlfriend, Wally, who made me dinner and rubbed my legs, who listened to me ramble and rant but also (and maybe more importantly) listened to my long silences, who read draft after draft, who held me when I was feeling scared and cheered for me when I was feeling brave, and showed me that love when it’s real makes everything else possible.
More in Personal Memoirs
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About the Author
Gabrielle Korn is an award-winning editor and journalist. She worked in digital media for nearly ten years, after graduating from NYU’s Gallatin School of Individualized Study with a BA in queer and feminist theory, and writing. She’s best known for her work at Nylon Media, where she served as editor in chief, and Refinery29, where she was the beauty editor and, later, director of fashion and culture. She currently works at Netflix. Born in Rhode Island, she moved to New York in 2000 and never left. She now lives in Brooklyn with her girlfriend and two rescue dogs. This is her first book.
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This publication is a memoir. It reflects the author’s present recollections of her experiences over a period of years. Some names and identifying characteristics of individuals have been changed. Some dialogue has been re-created from memory. Some scenes are composites of events. Events have been compressed and in some cases their chronology has been changed.
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Copyright © 2021 by Gabrielle Korn
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First Atria Paperback edition January 2021
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Author photograph © Lauren Perlstein
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Korn, Gabrielle, 1989– author.
Title: Everybody else is perfect : how I survived hypocrisy, beauty, clicks, and likes / Gabrielle Korn.
Other titles: Everybody is perfect
Description: First Atria Paperback edition. | New York : Atria Paperback, 2020.
Identifiers: LCCN 2019057651 (print) | LCCN 2019057652 (ebook) | ISBN 9781982127763 (paperback) | ISBN 9781982127787 (ebook)
Subjects: LCSH: Korn, Gabrielle, 1989– | Korn, Gabrielle, 1989—Anecdotes. | Women journalists—United States—Biography. | Lesbians—United States—Biography.
Classification: LCC PN4874.K667 A3 2020 (print) | LCC PN4874.K667 (ebook) | DDC 818/.603 [B]—dc23
LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2019057651
LC ebook record avai
lable at https://lccn.loc.gov/2019057652
ISBN 978-1-9821-2776-3
ISBN 978-1-9821-2778-7 (ebook)