Lost

by Ker Dukey

  “I’m sorry.” I can’t even say anything more because his words are suffocating me in a good way.

  He closes his eyes, his warm breath exhaling in a rush of emotion. But then he’s kissing me, his lips pressing against me in a way that I can only allow his total manipulation. He adores me in that single kiss, he gives me what lives inside him, hope, strength, promise, and fight. And I take it all from him, I grasp at it, needing it to give my heart a new beat.

  One of his hands slide into my hair as the other sits beneath the curve of my chin, holding me still until he had finished with me. I’ve never felt so much declaration in a kiss, not only devotion and worship but an order, a command to trust him because he will never hurt me. An authority that I’m only too willing to follow.

  Eventually he pulls away but his eyes fix on me as he softly swipes his thumb over my swollen lips. “You’re so beautiful when you’re flustered, Winnie.” There’s a twinkle in his eye, a second of happiness that I didn’t refuse his need for honesty. “I’m shocked, I actually managed to silence you.”

  Narrowing my eyes on him playfully, I swallow back the emotion and quickly say what’s on my mind. “I know there’s something there, Cole, I admit to feeling it too. But you need to learn to trust me or our ‘relationship’ can go nowhere.”

  He nods but he can’t hide his small smile. “Okay. Fifty, fifty relationship.”

  I quirk an eyebrow and smirk. “You can actually relinquish that much power?”

  I gasp when his hand suddenly circles my throat. “Never in the bedroom, sugar. Never there.”

  I have to gulp at the feelings that storm my body, my heart practically panting for him to give me a quick taster, but a hospital room isn’t exactly the place for that, so I bite into my lip and attempt to change the heated direction in which we were going.

  “I want to try and get Frank to talk, to give up the surveillance in the club.”

  Cole’s brows crash together, allowing my detour as he shifts awkwardly on the edge of the bed beside me, his hard erection obviously needing a little give in the tightening crotch of his denims. “Why would he do that, and what are you hoping to get from the club?”

  “The Angel killer was there when we were, he watched us Cole.”

  He stands and paces the floor. “I’ll get a warrant, we need to start doing things legit, Win. My captain questioned me about you earlier today.”

  “What, why?”

  “Because you keep appearing at crime scenes. Why do you think?”

  “Cole, you know that everything that’s incriminating at that club would have already been moved and stored somewhere safe. They know police will be all over the club now they have a reason to. There will be no evidence a warrant can get you.”

  “And how do you suppose we get this information?”

  “With cash, lots of cash.”

  He sighs, rubbing his eyes. I know he’s exhausted and caught between the cop in him and the man looking out for me and Summer but I had to do what I had to do and if he wanted to help he would need to allow me to do it.

  He looks the same, he doesn’t even have any grey hairs, must be nice leaving your responsibilities and becoming successful. His office is the same size as my entire apartment. It’s decorated in soft neutral tones with wilderness photography adorning the walls.

  He’s on the phone but his eyes are glued to mine, both curiosity and astonishment expressed openly through his stare. I told Cole to wait outside for me, which he isn’t happy about, but I needed to do this on my own. Look him in the eye and ask why he left his kid with a toxic parent instead of making a better life for her. When I gave my name at the front desk the receptionist made a call and then I was shown straight in.

  He ends the call and clasps his hands together on the desk. “Wow, I wasn’t sure if it was going to be your mother using your name to get in here.”

  “Does she come here often?” I query.

  He smiles at me and shakes his head. “Not really, but I don’t think I’ll ever be truly rid of her. You look so grown up, like your mother when she was young.”

  That’s the worst compliment I’ve ever been given.

  “She wasn’t always the addict, Winter,” he adds quickly after he sees disgust cover my face with his comparison.

  “Well maybe not to you, but as I was the payment for her drug addiction most of the time it’s harder for me to remember anything else.”

  His brow furrows and a tic appears in his jaw, the twitch of his skin mesmerizing my attention for a moment. “What do you mean by that?”

  “Exactly how it sounds. When was the last time you saw her?”

  It takes him a moment for that information to sink in but then he sits back in his chair and searches his memory. “About a year ago. She was at the same restaurant I was eating at, she looked well and introduced me as an old friend to her fiancé.”

  Her fiancé?

  My eyes widen in shock and I stare at him as astonishment renders me frozen.

  “It surprized me too,” he admits with a slight shake of his head, “But she looked taken care of, and the place we were eating at was high end.”

  “Do you know about Summer?”

  He shifts uncomfortably in his seat. His reaction makes my hackles rise but I bite into my lip for the moment. I need him, well, actually, I need his cash.

  “That was years ago, Winter. Why bring it up now?”

  His anger heats the already simmering resentment in my gut and I narrow my eyes into a glare. “Because time doesn’t stop, Denny. Just because you want to bail and pretend you’re not a father doesn’t alter the fact that you are one, albeit, a shit one. She’s missing, probably in the hands of a psychopath.”

  His eyes swing to mine and he juts his head back slightly, appearing puzzled by my words. “What the hell are you talking about? Summer died years ago.”

  He completely stuns me. What the hell is he talking about? Now it’s my turn to be confused. “What?”

  “Your mother told me what happened. Are you okay? Does the hospital know you’re here?”

  The simmering anger flips into fury and I have to grit my teeth to stop myself growling into fresh air. I sit forward on my chair, my disdain for him evaporating with his confusion. “Oh my God, what did she tell you?”

  “That you took her to the beach and she drowned in the sea, you couldn’t cope with what you’d done so you tried to kill yourself and your mom had to have you committed.”

  My mouth is hanging open. I would be shocked by how low my mother was willing to go, but in truth, she was a sick woman and there was nothing she wasn’t prepared to do to suit herself.

  “Me and Summer went into care and were then adopted out. Summer didn’t drown and I certainly didn’t let her drown or try to kill myself from guilt. Our mother tried to pimp Summer out to her dealer as payment. She was seven years old,” I spit.

  He stands abruptly and then sits before standing again. I can tell he doesn’t even know how to react to my revelation, his world completely spinning on its axis and mocking everything he knew. “I go to her grave,” he breathes quietly, arguing with himself.

  He grabs me by the arm and walks out of the office, pulling me along with him. Cole jumps up from his chair but I put my hand up to assure him it’s okay.

  “Where are you taking me, Denny?”

  “To her grave.”

  I pull my arm free and stop walking. “It’s not hers, you were lied to.”

  “Why? Why would she do that?”

  “Because she didn’t want you finding out that she used her kids, your kid, as a plaything for her dealer, and that I killed him to protect Summer.”

  There are a few women staring at me, at the drama unfolding in their otherwise quiet workplace, and gasps echo from my truth.

  “It’s the truth, I was the detective to respond,” Cole offers when Denny looks at me dubiously.

  His hands cover his face and I allow him a little time for this to sin
k in. A part of me feels guilty for being so abrupt when it appears he really is innocent in this, but I need to find my sister, and quickly. I don’t have time for tact and niceties, they will get me nowhere fast.

  When he marches back to his office I follow.

  “Before all that happened you still never came around to visit Summer. Why?” I demand.

  He collapses into his chair looking defeated and sighs heavily. “Your mother has never been the easiest of women, Winter. When I met her I was married.”

  And the new information keeps on coming.

  “My wife and I were going through a rough patch, she found out she was infertile and it threw her into a state of depression. I couldn’t go home and tell her I had a child outside of our marriage it would have tipped her over the edge.”

  “So your wife was more important than your child?”

  “It wasn’t like that. I tried to be involved in Summer’s life but your mother wanted me as the whole package. But I wasn’t going to leave my wife, I just couldn’t do it to her. She was broken enough. Yes, I admit I was scared of what she would do and I knew if she ended her own life then that guilt would be on me. Yes, I was a coward.” He flinches at his own words, shame biting at him. So your mother stopped me from seeing Summer. She would meet with me once a month to get money from me and in return she’d show me a picture of her. I didn’t know how bad things were for you both, I would have never stayed away if I knew.”

  “I’m not going to sit here and say it’s okay, Denny, because frankly your excuse is a selfish one. But there is a small way you can stand up and be the father Summer needs now.”

  “I can’t believe she’s alive.”

  “She might not be for long.”

  His eyes expand with this new information.

  “She’s missing, it’s been on the news, but her name is different to what you would know her as. I have a strong lead on who has her but I need information from someone, and it’s going to cost.”

  “I don’t understand? Who has her and why don’t the police get this information from this person?”

  “Because the police don’t know what the hell they’re doing. By the time they do anything Summer will be just another dead girl on this sick fuck’s list.”

  “I need proof of life!” he blurts out abruptly as his cheeks flush with embarrassment.

  I’m gobsmacked for a moment. “What?”

  “I’m sorry, Winter, but for all I know you’re here trying to get money from me and my daughter could have died all those years ago. How can I trust that it’s you and not your mother telling me the truth?”

  It offends me that he would believe I could be as heartless as her but he doesn’t really know me. And to be honest, he does have a point, especially how many times my mother lied to him. He’s bound to have trust issues. I turn up telling him that the daughter he thought died never died and that our mother was a lying bitch who pimped her own kids out.

  Walking around his lavish desk I click on his computer and bring up my social media page. I click on photos and pass the mouse to him so he can click through.

  His eyes mist over as image after image of Summer and me appear in view. My heart breaks a little for him. He has missed out on so much, and Summer is an exceptional kid, any person would be proud to be her parent. I was definitely proud to call her my sister.

  “She’s so beautiful,” he chokes and although I should give him time to come to terms with things, I’m also eager to get shit moving.

  I grab the keyboard from in front of him and bring up a news article about her disappearance.

  Fury covers his face as his teeth start to gnaw on his lips. He’s so tense that I can actually feel the vibrations coming from him. His eyes lift to mine and my stomach rolls when his tears trickle one after the other over his pale cheeks. “I’ll get you whatever you need. Just find her.”

  I’m standing in the bathroom of Cole’s apartment. He made me come back here to get changed and eat. What I didn’t know was he wasn’t planning on letting me go and confront Frank for information on my own. He needed to go into the precinct, and as I was about to protest to waiting for him, he closed in around me, pinning me against the tiled wall.

  He takes my hand in a gentle manner causing my heart to stampede. “I need you to promise me you’ll wait for me?” He brings my hand up to his lips, kissing the pads of my fingers before gently nipping them. My mouth pops open as my breathing becomes labored just from his closeness.

  I feel his cock push against the apex of my thighs and I can’t help but get wet for him. He brings out such lust inside me that it feels like the first time I’ve ever been touched.

  “I want to trace every part of you with my tongue, map out every inch that causes your body to tremor. Can I fuck you, baby? Can I bring you to your knees?”

  “Shut up and kiss me, Cole,” I beg.

  His lips crush against mine in a hungry need, tasting, biting, duelling with my tongue. His hands fight with the buttons on my jeans before moving up to remove my top. He grips the clasp of my bra and tugs until it tears, stripping it from my body. My tits sit proud and sensitive for his view. He just stares at them for a few silent beats before growling and taking a nipple into his mouth while his palm kneads the other.

  I’m throbbing and shaking with need. I can’t get close enough to him, pulling and tugging at his hair to make him suck and bite me harder. Releasing my nipple with a spiteful yet delicious bite he watches, mesmerized, as the blood from his work decorates the flesh of my nipple. “Red is so your color, Win,” he exhales on a broken breath.

  He grabs me, turning me to face the mirror over the vanity unit where he has his and her sinks. His bathroom was huge and it made me wonder if a woman had once lived here with him but in this moment I didn’t care. “Look at you, really fucking look at how beautiful you are.”

  I can’t refuse to look in the mirror because his hand is under my jaw, directing my head to look, but it’s him behind me, strong and demanding that holds my attention. His free hand reaches for a leather pouch on the unit; flipping it open he takes out a cutthroat razor and sends my body flying with possibilities.

  “Wiggle those jeans down, Win,” he commands and I comply willingly, stepping out of them as they reach my ankles. “Reach behind you and free my cock.”

  My hands hurry to expose his hard, pulsing cock from his jeans, immediately sliding my hands up and down the velvet shaft in firm strokes and pulling a deep, throaty moan from him. His hand moves from my jaw to clasp around my throat. I love that he’s so much bigger than me allowing his hand to completely surround the entire extent of my throat easily.

  His heavy breath breezes across my ear lobe as he growls, “Lean forward and place your hands either side of the faucets, Win.”

  He releases my throat and I do as he asks. He pushes a nozzle, which pushes the plug down in the basin, and then turns the cold water on, filling the sink. He pulls something from behind him and before I look to see what it is he’s cuffing my hand to the faucet and then repeating the process with the other hand.

  The freezing water quickly rises and with the position I’m in my tits become submerged, causing my nipples to tighten and peak, the cold stilling my breath and making me pant. The edge of the unit cuts into my stomach a little, giving me some guilty pleasure.

  “I’m going to fuck this beautiful ass of yours, Win, and paint the canvas red as I do.” I feel him push a finger against the tight hole and gasp. “But first I need some cum to lube you up.”

  His cock strokes up the seam of my pussy before prodding at the opening. The water has begun running down my navel and between my thighs, creating a puddle at my feet. The contrast with the cold water against my fevered flesh heightens all my nerve endings.

  “You ready, baby?”

  “Yes,” I barely murmur before his cock plunges into me as the blade of his razor simultaneously slices the flesh across my ass cheek.

  I call out from the pleas
ure and notice his eyes on mine through the mirror. He pounds into me a few times causing my body to splash and slap against the unit. I have to work to keep my feet from slipping and he smirks at me, knowing he has my mind concentrating on too many things to completely succumb to the pleasure just yet.

  Gripping my hair in one hand, he pulls my head back and thunders his pelvis into the back of me. Bringing the blade to the spot below my ear, he delicately slices, leaving a crimson line in his wake. The pleasure makes my breath hitch and my pussy tightens as the drop of blood hits the water in the sink.

  I build with his thrusts and just as I’m about to scream out he pushes my head down into the water, seizing my oxygen and shocking my body. I come undone at the same time my body fights for air. My pussy clutches at him and pulses as I come around his cock. My whole body shudders and weakens with the height of the orgasm. It feels like I’m about to pass out but my head is lifted and a rush of air whooshes into my lungs as I suck in the oxygen.

  His cock leaves my pussy as I fill my lungs and before I can focus, he pushes his fingers into my ass. A sting lights up my ass cheek as he makes a few shallow cuts and then makes a grunting sound before hot cum rains down across my back and ass. His fingers push further into me and swirl around causing my legs to weaken and my head to drop forward.

  Pulling his fingers free he mixes his cum with my blood and smears it over the tight hole and inside. The sting from the cuts mixed with his cum bring an ecstasy like no other. A heavy palm comes down, slapping over the fresh wounds. “You ready for me, Win?”

  “Yes!” I cry out, desperate for more. I’m amazed he has a fresh erection so quickly.

  His cock prods at the hole and pushes inside, he isn’t at full thickness as a result of just coming, but as he urges further inside the tight, forbidden hole it grows and lengthens, filling me up.

  “Fuck,” he groans, pinching at my hips as he delves deeper inside me. “I want you to watch us in the mirror as I fuck your ass, Win.”