Times Squared

by Julia DeVillers

  “Cashmere, you should try out for the next show,” Tess said. “You were so good as the Cat in the Hat in our elementary school play.”

  I didn’t know that Tess and Cashmere went to the same elementary. I also didn’t know she starred in a school play.

  “Cashmere is a good actress and has a really good singing voice,” Tess continued.

  “Cashmere is just joining drama to come to New York with me,” Sydney explained. “She’s not trying out for any plays.”

  “I don’t understand why I can’t,” Cashmere whined.

  I understood. I remembered that Sydney hadn’t wanted Cashmere to join drama. It must have been because Sydney wanted to be the star! She was afraid of the competition!

  “Save our seats,” Sydney snapped at her. She tried to lift her giant suitcase.

  “Oh, there’s Nick. He can help me with my bags.”

  Nick came down the aisle. He helped Sydney put her two huge chocolate brown and pink suitcases into the overhead compartment. Then she slid into the seat with her stuffed tote bag on her lap.

  “Whew! That’s a lot of stuff!” he said.

  “Nick to the rescue,” Sydney said. “My hero!”

  Gag.

  But I couldn’t say anything. I could barely look at him! Nick stopped next to where Tess and I were sitting.

  “Hey, guys,” he said.

  I blushed and looked down.

  It’s not like I wanted to avoid Nick. I just didn’t know what to say! I couldn’t believe it. I used to make fun of Emma for not being able to talk to boys. And now I was the one turning purple.

  “Is anyone sitting here?” he asked, pointing to the seat in front of us.

  “Where’s Reilly?” Sydney asked. “Reilly might want to sit there.”

  Nick was cute. But Reilly was definitely the hottest guy in drama. He was in eighth grade and didn’t seem into Sydney, but that didn’t seem to stop her from trying.

  “Reilly’s already sitting up front.” Nick pointed to the front of the bus. “So I guess it’s cool if I sit here.”

  He slid into the seat in front of me. Tess poked me. Yay! I could stare at the back of Nick’s head for the whole trip!

  “Dude!” A guy named Charlie came down the aisle and stopped at Nick’s seat. “I’m sitting with you.”

  “Sorry, Sam’s already planning on it,” Nick said.

  “Not anymore,” Charlie said cheerfully. “Burkle is making us change seats. She doesn’t want me sitting with Reilly because we’re trouble with a capital T.”

  “Go tell Burkle to let Reilly sit here instead of you,” Sydney told him.

  “Pht, I’m not going up there.” Charlie shook his head. “It’s all teachers. Besides, Burkle told Reilly she needed to keep an eye on him. She blames him for the eighth-grade campout bus spitball incident last month.”

  We all leaned to look. Sure enough, Reilly was sitting next to Mrs. Burkle. He was going to have a loooong trip!

  Coach Babbitt called for the mathletes to get on the bus from the back door.

  “The back seats are so much cooler.” I sighed. “Why do the math geeks get to sit in the back?”

  And at exactly the same time, someone behind me said, “Why do the drama geeks get to sit in the front?”

  It was Emma! In class, Emma always likes to sit in the front seat, close to the teacher. I guess the bus was the same.

  I turned around and climbed onto my knees to see what was going on. And looked right into the face of . . .

  Emma!

  She was sliding into the seat right behind me.

  “Oh, hello,” Emma said to me. “I guess you didn’t need to say that whole dramatic good-bye.”

  “I didn’t think you’d sit right behind me,” I said. “I thought we’d be separated.”

  “You can pretend I’m not here,” Emma said.

  I slid back into my own seat.

  “Cool,” Tess said. “We can all hang out!”

  “What is the total surface area of a right circular cone with radius five and altitude twelve?” Emma said in a not-quiet-enough voice.

  Ergh. Annoying. I turned around and leaned over the seat. Emma was droning on.

  “Emma!” I said. “Are you going to talk math to yourself the whole trip?”

  “No,” Emma said.

  Phew.

  “I’m going to talk to Nima, remember?” Emma said. “This is Nima.” A girl with long dark hair sat down next to Emma.

  “Hi, Nima,” I said.

  “Acccck!” Nima looked up and shrieked. Emma and I jumped at the same time.

  “Are you okay?” Emma and I said at the same time.

  “There’s two Emmas?” Nima said, still looking startled.

  “Oh, I’m her twin,” I said, reassuring her. “You haven’t seen us in school? Or maybe . . . on the school VOGcast?”

  “Nima can be a little oblivious to the world,” Emma said. “Right, Nima? That’s why I like her. She’s focused. All math, all the time!”

  Nima smiled like she’d been given a compliment.

  “Sorry I screamed,” Nima said to me. “I thought I was seeing double. Maybe I’d been studying multiplication so much, even people multiplied.”

  “We look alike but we’re totally different people,” I started to say. But Emma turned to Nima.

  “Emma,” Nima said, “the answer to your conic geometry question—which is my specialty—is ninety times pi.”

  All right, enough of that. I slid back into my seat. Their chanting math problems floated around and wedged in my skull.

  “Okay, they are going to drive me crazy,” I said to Tess.

  “Mathletes competitions are pretty intense,” Tess said. “Practicing is a good idea for the trip.”

  Oh yeah, Tess used to be on mathletes too.

  “A gelato shop has four different flavors and six different mix-ins. If you wanted to get one flavor and two different mix-ins, how many different combinations could you get?”

  I just couldn’t tune her out! And then Tess called out, “Sixty.”

  “That’s right!” Emma said. “Good job, Tess.”

  Oh no! Tess was going to get sucked in too.

  “Uh, Emma?” I leaned over. “Would it be possible for you to switch seats and go sit somewhere else? Pretty please?”

  “The front seat is a sign of academic power,” Emma explained. “The front seat in class, the front row of the bus. Sitting here gives me a mental edge going into the competition.”

  Then she lowered her voice.

  “And Jazmine James has the other ‘front’ seat,” she whispered. “So I can’t give her the win.”

  I looked over across the aisle. Jazmine James was sitting in her seat with Hector. They were quizzing each other too.

  Well, I didn’t want those two sitting behind me either. It was like the rectangle of evil over there, with Sydney, Jazmine, Hector, and Cashmere.

  Defeated, I slid back in my seat. I’d have to ignore the goings-on behind me, but at least I could look at Nick’s head in front of me.

  “Help,” I pleaded to Tess. “Entertain me so I don’t have to hear Emma’s voice.”

  “Do you want to do math problems?” Tess asked. “I could quiz you.”

  “No!”

  “I’m kidding!” Tess said.

  “Children! Children! Please direct your attention to the back of the bus.”

  We all turned around to see a woman in a black suit and red scarf standing in the aisle near the back. When Jazmine groaned, I realized it was her mother.

  “I am Mrs. James. I am one of your parent chaperones.” Mrs. James looked stern. “We are seated in the very back of the bus, if you need our assistance. Or to go to the restroom, which also is located in the back of the bus.”

  Everyone was like, “Ewww! Go to the bathroom on the bus? No way!”

  I noticed Jazmine had shrunk down in her seat and looked embarrassed. It made me very glad that my parents were not chaperoning. />
  “Students! Please remain seated while the bus is in motion!” Coach Babbitt announced.

  And then the bus started to move. We were off!

  Tess and I drew pictures on our hands with markers. We talked about our favorite songs and the show that was on last night. We talked about wizards versus werewolves versus fairies. Then I played Tess my new ringtones on my cell.

  “Do you want some snacks?” Tess asked. She pulled out her tote bag.

  “I hear snacks!” A head popped over the top of the seat.

  “Swedish fish.” Tess held up a bag.

  “Yum,” Charlie said. He reached over and grabbed a handful.

  “I have cheese puffs,” I said. “They’re in my overhead case.”

  I got up and stood in the aisle. I reached up and found the cheese puffs where my mom had packed them in the outside pocket.

  I could see Nick sitting in the seat in front of me. And he looked up and smiled at me.

  Ah. He had a cute smile. I tugged on the bag of cheese puffs. Then my suitcase tilted and started falling on my head. Whoa! I pushed it back and then—

  “Hey!” I heard my sister yell.

  And Nima yelped and Tess gasped and Charlie started laughing, because cheese puffs were falling from the overhead!

  “Dude, cheese puffs from the sky!” Charlie tried to catch them in his mouth.

  “Sorry! Sorry!” I said.

  Emma stood up to help me and grabbed the cheese puffs bag just as it fell completely. Unfortunately, that just poofed the remaining cheese dust into the air.

  “Hey, look.” Charlie laughed. “Orange twins!”

  I looked at Emma. She had massive cheese-puff fallout in her hair. I’m sure I matched. I saw Sydney and Cashmere laughing hysterically. I couldn’t even look at Nick.

  Could this be any more embarrassing?

  “Excuse me,” Emma said, looking to Charlie. “The proper term is ‘conjoined twins.’ And Payton and I were never conjoined. But the most famous pair were Chang and Eng, who were conjoined at the liver and traveled with a circus.”

  Yes. Yes, it could be more embarrassing.

  “Maybe you two could travel with the circus,” Sydney suggested.

  “Emma, why don’t you help dust off Nima?” I said brightly. “And shush.”

  “People!” Mrs. Burkle’s voice rang out. “Emma Mills, are you standing? Even though I stated everyone must stay seated while the bus is in motion? Are you breaking my rules?”

  “Mrs. Burkle, I was just . . . I was just . . . ,” Emma called back frantically. “I was just about to suggest a bus singalong! For . . . Gecko spirit!”

  A what?

  “A Gecko singalong!” Mrs. Burkle said happily. “What a marvelous idea! Emma, why don’t you lead us in song!”

  “Me?” Emma said, turning deep purple. She looked at me for help. Sorry, singing was one place twin-switching would not make a difference. Neither of us could sing.

  Emma was frozen.

  “Sing.” Sydney smiled. And then I thought of someone who would sing.

  “Cashmere!” I said. “Do you know ‘Three Cheers for the Bus Driver’?”

  “Duh,” Cashmere said, and started singing. Whew! And wow! She did have a good voice. No wonder Sydney wouldn’t let her try out.

  “Everybody sing!” Mrs. Burkle joined in. Coach Babbitt’s voice boomed.

  “Three cheers for the bus driver, best of them all!”

  Everyone was singing. Well, pretty much everyone. I was mouthing the words. I was sure Emma was too.

  Phew.

  Brrrrzt. Emma was texting me.

  Thx for the save!

  I texted her back.

  ? What were u thinking? U wanted 2 sing?

  I choked! I couldn’t think!

  Well, every1 is now.

  Except me. It’s too loud to practice math.

  Gee, I felt so sorry for her. Not! I did feel sorry for me. I had totally embarrassed myself in front of Nick. I leaned over to pick up some cheese puffs as everyone switched to singing a Barney the dinosaur song and cracked themselves up.

  I tried to wipe the orange off my fingers.

  “Here.” Emma handed me something through the seats. Hand wipes. Of course. Emma always carried a pack of them.

  “You can use them up,” Emma said. “I brought a travel two-pack. And just so you know, if you need bandages, floss, or duct tape, I came prepared.”

  Four

  STILL ON THE BUS

  “New. York. City!!!”

  I looked up from my mathletes book. People were cheering. I stood up to look over at Payton. Some moments I needed to share with my twin. I knew she was as excited as I was to be in the city.

  Payton was asleep, her head tilted back against the seat.

  “Payton!” I said. “We’re here!”

  “Oz?” Payton asked. Oh, she was sleep-talking. Heh.

  “Wake up, Payton!” I said. “Tess, shake her a little. Otherwise she’ll sleep through the whole trip.”

  “Trip? Click your heels three times,” Payton said, eyes still closed.

  Tess grinned and shook Payton awake.

  “Wha?” Payton asked, a piece of hair sticking out at a thirty-degree angle from her head.

  “Good morning, bedhead,” I said to her. “Technically bus head.”

  Payton patted her hair, felt the wayward chunk, and said “Gah!”

  I smiled and sat back down in my seat, where Nima still had her nose in her math book. I looked over her and saw tall buildings in the distance. Not like our hometown tall. Skyscraper tall! Our bus was crossing a bridge over the Hudson River that led to . . .

  “New York City!” Everyone started cheering. I looked over at Jazmine James. She was staring down at her study book, ignoring the noise.

  “Mathletes! Dramatic Geckos! Silence!” Coach Babbitt didn’t have much volume, but his voice meant no nonsense.

  Silence.

  “The seat across from Mrs. Burkle is currently unoccupied,” Coach Babbitt said. “Someone needs to return to his or her seat immediately. No wandering.”

  “It is Samuel!” Mrs. Burkle said, and raised her voice. “Sam the munchkin! Return to your seat immediately!”

  I remembered Sam, from the Wizard of Oz play.

  “Maybe he went back to Munchkinland?” Hector suggested loudly.

  Jazmine snickered, but she did not move her eyes from the page.

  “Boy, she’s really serious about this competition,” I whispered to Nima.

  “She wants to take back what is rightfully hers,” Nima whispered to me. “The mathletes championship.”

  Excuse me?

  “That championship is rightfully mine,” I said, louder than I’d intended. “I won.”

  “Only because I had caught a virus from your snotty twin rugrats,” Jazmine said.

  By “rugrats” she meant Mason and Jason. Okay, they kind of sneezed on her.

  “You’d better keep studying, then,” I said in my best competition voice.

  “So should we,” said Nima. “We’ve got approximately fifteen minutes before our arrival in Times Square. Emma, how many points with integer coordinates are exactly five units away from the origin?”

  I pictured the coordinate plane and calculated using the distance formula. “Twelve points,” I said.

  “Correct.” Nima nodded.

  “Sam the munchkin!” Mrs. Burkle yelled again. “Yoohoo! Are you in the restroom? You’re taking a long time! We’re waiting for you!”

  Lots of people giggled.

  “Ox!” a voice hissed. “Hey, Ox!”

  Yikes!

  The voice came from under my feet! Then Sam’s face appeared from under the seats ahead of me.

  “Aaack!” I shrieked.

  “Aaaack!” Nima shrieked.

  “Where’s Ox?” Sam said, looking up at us.

  “Not under our seat,” I told him.

  “Why are you crawling on the floor?” Nima asked. “How
can you even fit under there?”

  “Didn’t you hear?” Hector said, blurting in from his seat on the other side. “He’s a munchkin.”

  Jazmine snorted.

  “I couldn’t take it up there anymore. Burkle’s been doing some vocal exercises. She sounds like she’s a gargling cat.”

  Payton’s and Tess’s heads popped over their seat backs.

  “Sam,” Payton complained, “you’re kicking my legs.”

  That made sense. They had the lower part of Sam’s body under their row.

  “Oopsie,” Tess said, and dropped a chunk of bagel. It bounced off Sam’s head.

  “Hey!” Sam exclaimed. Loudly.

  “What is going on here?” Coach Babbitt came down the aisle and stopped at our row.

  “Emma Mills is harboring a fugitive,” Jazmine James said.

  “I am not.” I glared at her. “He just . . . appeared.”

  “Sam, get up,” Coach Babbitt ordered.

  “I think I’m stuck,” Sam said, his face turning a shade of red.

  The bus was quiet. Everyone was interested now.

  “Who knew all the drama would be in the mathletes section?” someone in front of us said. Ha-ha.

  Then.

  Thump. Roll. Thump. Roll. A strange sound grew louder and closer, then bump!

  “Ow!” Sam yelled. “Something just hit me.”

  Tess disappeared, and then came up holding a soda can.

  “It must have rolled down from the front,” Tess said.

  Nima and I pulled our legs up onto our seats to give Coach Babbitt room to reach down and assist Sam. Coach Babbitt tugged, and Sam slid out.

  “Back to your seat, Sam,” Coach said. “We’ll discuss your consequences up there.” Coach Babbitt went back up the aisle. Sam calmly stood up, brushed himself off, and moved to the aisle.

  Whew. I stretched my legs out.

  “Thanks,” Sam said. I was about to say “You’re welcome” when I realized he was talking to Tess. He’d taken the soda pop out of her hand.

  “All that crawling made me thirsty,” Sam said.

  Oh. No.

  “Don’t—” I was going to explain the scientific results of rapid molecular movement and a sudden release of energy when it happened.

  Sam popped the top.

  Ka-floom! Foam, bubbles, and liquid exploded into the air. And then gravity intervened, and it all rained down. Mostly onto the two people on the inside aisle. Payton and me.