I performed for over an hour, and before we went on stage, I told the bodyguard who’s on duty backstage tonight that I didn’t want any girls back there except for the list I gave him. No random women sneaking into my dressing room fawning all over me and hoping for a hook up. I’m over that shit. No liquor in my room either. I need to keep a clear head so I can talk to these record people and see what they have to say.
I did some research on Evergreen and I like the company’s message. They seem selective on who they sign, and they have a couple of up-and-coming superstars on their roster. They have big dreams and lots of plans, just like I do. I don’t think I’d get lost in the shuffle with them. They’re not too big of a machine yet.
They’re exactly what I’m looking for. Now here’s hoping the terms are agreeable.
Once I do a couple of encores—what the fuck is this life—I find my way backstage, collapsing in the chair in my dressing room and going through about two and half water bottles before I finally feel like I’ve got enough fluids in me.
There’s a knock at the door before it cracks open, Stu, the bodyguard, peeking his dark head inside. “Your friends are here.”
“Let them in,” I tell him, anticipation thrumming hard through my veins.
They burst into the dressing room seconds later, noisy as fuck, giant smiles on their faces as they greet me. They all embrace me, even Ava, who gives me a big hug and calls me a sexy rock star.
“Hey, don’t call him sexy,” Eli protests, yanking her into his arms. He glares at me as if I’m going to try something with her.
I just bark out a laugh. He’s crazy.
“I’d say about two thirds of that crowd were creaming their panties over you,” Caleb says to me as we perform a complicated handshake we made up recently. “Though that band before you was a tough act to follow.”
“It was my idea for them to open for me,” I say. Cupid’s Bow are all barely out of high school, like me, and they’re trying to make it big. Also like me. They’re all a bunch of pretty boys who are playing up their looks over their talent, but I get it. They’re not bad, but they look way better than they sound.
“You’re fucking crazy. They about stole the spotlight,” Caleb says truthfully.
I’m not worried about it, but I appreciate his concern. So I just slap him on the back, my gaze snagging on Ellie, who is currently chatting with Gracie and Hayden, glancing over at me what feels like every five seconds.
I don’t stop looking at her either, and when her gaze finally meets mine, I crook my finger at her, silently calling her over.
She doesn’t even hesitate. Just glides right on over to me, her expression wary, though her eyes are clear as she studies me.
“What did you think?” I ask as I grab a towel from the counter and wipe the sweat off my forehead. I’m still amped up. A little shaky even. Adrenaline coursing through my veins after such an epic performance. I need a shower. Wouldn’t mind fucking all of this energy out of me either.
Wonder if Ellie’s game, because she’s the only one I currently want to fuck.
Her smile is small. As if she’s trying to contain it. “You were—good.”
“That’s it? That’s all I get?” I raise my brows, wanting more.
I always want more when it comes to her.
“I’m supposed to be mad at you, Jackson,” she says, though she doesn’t sound that mad at all.
“Yeah, I know,” I say like a smug dick, but fuck it. “What did you think of your song?”
“My song?”
“Pink,” I tell her with a dirty grin. “That was all about you.”
She’s quiet. Everyone else is talking, laughing. They’re loud. Obnoxious. Happy. But the sounds fade, and all I can do is focus on Ellie and what she’s about to say to me. I’m in suspense, worried she might’ve hated it.
“Were you actually referring to my—” She waves a hand in the direction of her lower body.
Unable to resist, I sneak my arm around her waist and pull her in close, dropping a kiss on her surprised lips. “Yes,” I murmur against her mouth. “All of those words were true. I’m a dumbass, El.”
“Oh, I know you are.” She gently sets her hands on my chest, as if she’s going to push me away.
I can feel her touch right down to my bones. Deeper. I want those hands all over me. Taking off my clothes. Stroking me. Guiding me home. To the spot between her legs where I know I’ll fit perfectly.
She doesn’t push me away. She pulls me in instead, slipping her arms around my neck, her fingers toying with the hair at my nape. “You’re a pain in my ass, Jackson Rivers.”
“I know. I’m a stupid fuck. But come home with me tonight and I’ll show you how much you mean to me,” I murmur, just before I steal a kiss.
“What the fuck? Now you two are together?”
This comes from Caleb.
Ellie pulls away from me, her cheeks flushed as she laughs. “We don’t know what we are, Caleb.”
“I know what we are.” I slink my arm around her shoulders, pulling her into my side. “She’s mine.”
They all say “ooooh” at the same time, the fuckers. Every single one of them.
Ellie’s cheeks turn pink. I glare. They all laugh at us, just as we start laughing too.
I am on top of the world right now.
On top of the fucking world.
There’s a loud knock at the door, just before Stu barges inside. “There’s a group from Evergreen Records here to talk to you, J. What do you want me to tell them?”
I glance around at my friends. “Time to leave, folks.”
Complaining groans fill the air, but they all file out of the room, offering their congratulations to me as they pass by. Ellie tries to make her escape with them, but I keep my arm firmly around her shoulders, not letting her go until they’re all gone and I’ve sent Stu away to bring Rick and his cronies back to the dressing room.
“Give me a kiss for luck,” I tell her, feeling cocky.
“You don’t need it.” She gives me a sweet peck on the lips anyway, pulling away before I can demand more. “Good luck. You’ve got this.”
“This one feels right to me,” I tell her, suddenly nervous.
Scared.
Damn it, I’ve never been scared talking to any of these record label people. Not once. I’m the one who always acted like I’ve got nothing to lose, and they’ve had everything to gain. But right now, I’m worried I’ll somehow mess this up.
And I don’t want to. Not with this label.
Ellie’s expression turns serious too. As if she understands how important this is to me, even though I haven’t said that out loud yet. The girl can read my mind. She’s so attuned to me. Just like I’m tuned in to her.
“You’re going to be fine. I’m sure they already love you,” she whispers, patting me in the center of my chest. She curls her fingers around the chain dangling from my neck, pulling on it so I have no choice but to meet her lips one more time for a gentle kiss. “Just be yourself, Jackson. They won’t be able to resist you.”
I blow out a harsh breath, leaning my forehead against hers for a beat as I gather my thoughts and nerves. “Right. Okay. You coming back to my apartment? We’re having a small get-together. I want you there.”
“I wasn’t planning on it,” she admits, biting her lower lip in that way of hers. I want to be the one who bites that lip. “I was kind of mad at you.”
“You still mad?” I hang on her every word, praying she doesn’t reject me.
“A little.” She shrugs. A small smile tickling the corners of her lips. “How can I stay mad when you write me dirty songs?”
“Then it worked.” I squeeze her hand as she slowly pulls away from me. “I won’t be too long, I don’t think. I’m not sure how this is going to go.”
“It’ll be great.” She smiles.
I wish I had as much faith in myself as she has in me.
I watch her leave the room, my gaze glued on her
ass, exhaling loudly with relief that she’s not completely pissed at me. The minute she’s gone, three dudes and an extraordinarily beautiful woman stride into the dressing room, all wearing matching cool smiles on their faces as they study me with undisguised interest.
It’s a little creepy. I feel like an animal locked up in a zoo.
The one in the expensive suit steps forward, his hand thrust out toward me. “Jackson, a pleasure to meet you. I’m Rick.”
I shake his hand. “Nice to finally meet you.”
“Terrific performance tonight. Really enthusiastic crowd,” he says, nodding as he glances around the cramped dressing room. “No alcohol to celebrate?”
“Wanted to keep a clear head,” I tell him truthfully.
“Got it. Well, we think you’re fabulous. Amazing. Such a unique sound, considering the market currently. Great rendition of Vultures. Mayer is a lyrical genius,” Rick gushes.
“Thanks.” I’m suddenly filled with the need to have a shot to calm my nerves.
“And that new song. ‘Pink’? That’s a hit in the making right there,” Rick continues. “A little fine tuning is all it would take to turn it into a chart topper.”
“No shit?” I rub my jaw. I wrote it for Ellie, never thinking it could be an actual hit. I just wrote it to work my feelings out.
“Very racy,” the attractive woman says with a faint smile, her gaze meeting mine. Her eyes are ice blue, her hair platinum blonde, her skin is smooth as silk, and her tits look ready to bust out of the low neckline of her shirt. “Lots of innuendo.”
“More than innuendo. We can all figure out what you were singing about.” Rick laughs. “Though you don’t come right out and say it.”
“Yeah.” I smile, glancing around at each of them. “I’m glad you enjoyed the performance.”
“We did. We did. We’re, uh, we’re also very interested in the band that opened for you. Cupid’s Bow.” Rick shakes his head, rubbing his jaw with his hand. “Those boys were something else.”
My stomach sinks. “Did you talk to them?”
“We did. We did.” He nods repeatedly, overly enthusiastic. “We set up an appointment with them next week.”
“Great. They’re an awesome bunch of guys,” I say, fighting disappointment.
Rick keeps rambling, and the other guys chime in, introducing themselves to me, though I immediately forget their names. The woman eyes me like a piece of meat she wants to consume. They talk and talk, but they don’t say anything of substance, and that’s when it hits me.
They’re not going to offer a meeting to me. I know it. I can feel it in my bones. And I did this shit to myself. It was my idea to have Cupid’s Bow open for me, and look what it got me.
Straight out of a record deal.
Twenty-Six
Ellie
The moment Jackson walks into the apartment, everyone starts cheering. Calling his name and clapping, Caleb whistling so loud it makes my ears hurt. I clap along with them, my excitement dying the moment I see the look on Jackson’s face.
He’s not happy. Not at all.
Oh, he’s smiling and nodding and holding his hand up, so his friends can slap their palms together. He graciously hugs Ava and Jocelyn, who are both gushing over his performance. Diego gives him a hug too, just before the couple slips out, having to get home so they can relieve their babysitter, which is Jocelyn’s mom and sister.
But I can see it in his eyes, in his entire demeanor. Things didn’t go the way he wanted them to with the record label, and my heart aches for him.
He takes the beer Eli offers him and polishes it off in a couple of gulps. Caleb gives him another beer as I wait for him to come to me, my eyes never straying from him as he moves about the apartment.
It takes him a while to notice me, but I’m not offended. I can tell he needs their accolades. He was feeling down and they’re treating him like the man. I totally get it. I’m just sitting here, listening to Gracie go on about how she got the Snapchat handle from one of the guys in Cupid’s Bow, and how she’s totally going to hit him up.
Finally, Jackson notices me, and the relief that crosses his face when our gazes meet sends a little thrill deep inside me. I sit up straighter, on the edge of the couch, pleased when he settles directly beside me and leans in for a kiss.
I give it to him, right in front of everyone, pleased that he’s not holding back. I’m so used to him doing that. When we were both in high school, he would talk to me for hours on Snap, and then pretend I barely existed in person. It devasted me.
To have him kissing me in front of everyone, not giving a crap who sees, is what I’ve wanted for what feels like years.
“Are you all right?” I whisper when he pulls away.
His smile stays firmly in place as he slowly shakes his head. “Not really. We can talk about it later though.”
I touch his cheek, wishing he wasn’t so down. “It’s going to be okay.”
“With you?” He raises a brow.
I nod.
Jackson presses his cheek against mine, his mouth at my ear. “I wish we could go to my room.”
“I wish we could too,” I whisper in return. “But they want to spend time with you.” I wave my hand in the general direction of our friends.
“I’ll give them thirty minutes,” he says, as he reluctantly pulls away from me.
“That’s definitely not long enough.” I laugh when he scowls. “Ninety minutes.”
“No fucking way,” he practically growls. “An hour.”
“Perfect. An hour.” Anticipation races through me when I see the dirty gleam in his gaze as he studies me. I know what he’s thinking about.
I’m thinking about it too.
“Countdown is on,” he says, just before he leaps to his feet. “See you in an hour. I need to go make the rounds with my people.”
I giggle, waving at him. Fighting the combination of nerves and excitement that fills me at what we’re about to do. At what epic line we’re going to cross in our relationship.
The moment he’s gone, Gracie says something. And I’d sort of forgotten she was sitting there on the couch.
“What was that all about?” The sly look on her face tells me she already knows.
“Nothing,” I say, trying to infuse my voice with an air of mystery, but Gracie isn’t buying it.
“Uh, huh. Are you two making sex plans for later?” She crosses her arms, waiting for my answer.
I can’t hide it from her. I’m too excited. “Yes,” I say with a giant grin. “We are.”
“Make sure he’s gentle with you.” When I frown, she rolls her eyes, lowering her voice. “You’re a virgin, Ellie. It’s going to hurt.”
I don’t want it to hurt. I want it to feel amazing. I want him to feel amazing too. I’m sure he’s used to being with women who aren’t virgins. Who are adventurous and willing to do anything. I’m definitely willing when it comes to Jackson, and I’m sure I’ll be bold, especially when it has to do with him, but I don’t want to be in pain or cry over it.
“Won’t it hurt no matter how we approach this?” I ask her.
“Yeah. I mean, the intensity level could fluctuate,” she says, her expression thoughtful. “Make sure you’re good and lubricated.”
Ha. I sort of want to die of embarrassment over this.
“I don’t think that’ll be a problem,” I say, trying to keep a straight face.
Just before we both burst into giggles.
I spend the next hour enjoying my time with my friends, soaking up Ava’s bubbly good mood, laughing with her and the rest of the girls as she tells us stories about her time so far in San Diego. The weather is perfect, she spends a lot of free time at the beach and she’s become friends with her dorm roommate.
“But she’ll never replace you,” Ava says to me at one point, which makes me misty eyed.
“She better not,” I say gruffly, just before I pull her into a hug.
I’m hugging on a lot of people toni
ght. It doesn’t help that I’ve had a couple of shots. A giant margarita made by Caleb, who’s on bartending duty tonight. I don’t even ask where the liquor comes from. They just always seem to magically have it, I’m guessing thanks to older friends.
Oh wait. Caleb keeps mentioning his fake ID. That’s where they’re getting it.
“There’s a party at my frat tomorrow night,” Caleb says. “You should all come.”
“Yes!” Ava shouts, smiling at all of us. “I’m there.”
“What if I want to keep you to myself?” Eli asks her as he approaches her from behind, slinging his arms around her waist.
“We can hang out at the party for a while,” she says. “And then you can have me all to yourself.”
A happy sigh leaves me as I watch them, feeling sappy. Gracie sighs too.
“They’re couple goals,” she says.
“So are Hayden and Tony,” I add.
“Right? He would do anything for her. He’s so good for her. They’re good for each other.” Gracie slowly shakes her head. “It feels like I will never find that.”
“You will,” I tell her firmly. “He’s out there, just waiting for you.”
“Really? Because I’m starting to think a guy like that doesn’t exist for me.” Her gaze goes to Caleb, as if she can’t help herself.
“You like him?” I ask.
“Not particularly,” she says with a sigh. “I find him attractive. I’m drawn to his pretty face and his fucked-up mouth. I bet he’s amazing in bed. Or wherever else he likes to have sex.”
“I had a huge crush on him in middle school. When he was in the eighth grade and I was in the seventh,” I admit.
Her eyes widen. “Really? Do tell.”
I shrug. “It’s like a rite of passage at my school for every girl to have a crush on Caleb Burke at some point in their life. He’s just so attractive and flirty. He always has been. He makes every girl feel like she matters, even though, deep down, he doesn’t really give a shit.”
“I don’t think he doesn’t give a shit,” Gracie says, actually defending him. “It’s more like he just really likes women. All sorts of them.”
The Sophomore Page 23