To Mend Fearful Hearts

by Dixie Lynn Dwyer

  “Get off of her right now,” Kenny yelled and reached for the guy, but Larkin squeezed her so tight she lost her balance.

  Rome grabbed the guy by his ear and yanked him. Larkin released her, and Rome tossed him onto the floor. Immediately the bouncers were there to escort Larkin out of there.

  Kenny cupped her cheek and held onto her shoulder. “Are you okay?” he barked.

  “I’m fine. He was just drunk,” she said and fixed her top. He placed his hand over hers and fixed it for her. His palm grazed her breast, and she paused to stare up at him.

  Rome pressed against her back and moved his arm around her waist. “You need to be more assertive and make sure these men know you mean business.” She was shocked.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” she asked him, tilting her head up and over her shoulder at him.

  “Means he was flirting all night.”

  “He wasn’t the only one,” she said and shoved from their hands and walked away and toward the restroom.

  “Cherise, are you okay?” Leeann asked and Ade too from behind the bar.

  “I need a few minutes. I think the idiot drooled on me,” she said, and they chuckled and just watched her walk away.

  She acted tough, but ever since that night at Black Jack when those men sneaked the drug into her drink, she hadn’t been the same. She couldn’t let on to the fears she had or the nightmares where she recalled the one guy forcibly kissing her and then even sliding his hand between her legs. It irked her. She shoved open the door and growled low. She grabbed onto the sink and wet a paper towel, then rubbed her chest and then dried it. She fixed her top and then looked at herself in the mirror. She felt numb to the incident but not numb to the Waters brothers’ reactions, or the way it felt when they touched her. She couldn’t wait for this night to end.

  She shook her head, took a few more steady breaths, and then headed back out. Rome was there. He grabbed her hand and pulled her down the hallway near the exit door. Instead of going outside, he brought her to the corner and pinned her there. He was breathing through his nostrils.

  “What are you doing?” she asked him, feeling both shocked and a bit intimidated. He towered over her. The man was big and then some.

  He slid his palm up under her hair and head and wrapped his arm around her waist, hauling her close, and he kissed her. He was so big, so strong and solid, she was completely turned on by him. She moaned into his mouth, and he used his palm to squeeze her ass and then cup her breast. She was rocking her hips against him, and he pressed her harder against the wall. He moved his mouth from her lips to her neck.

  “Oh God,” she said.

  “Fuck,” he whispered and licked into her deep cleavage of her breasts.

  She gripped his arm and placed a hand on his waist. “Rome.” She said his name.

  He lifted his mouth from her skin, and he nipped her chin, tugged on her lower lip, and then kissed her again. It was wild, and she was completely aroused, but she was at work. He moved his mouth off her lips and then to her neck. He inhaled against her skin, her hair.

  “Stop, slow down. I’m working,” she said to him.

  He grunted and then slowly pulled back. He yanked her by her hips against his hips. “You sure that you’re okay?” he asked.

  “Okay from that guy, or okay after you just kissed me like that?” she asked.

  He firmed his lips. She was still denying this attraction, and he and his brothers were somewhat too.

  “I need to get back to work.”

  He cupped her cheek and her hair. “You watch your ass and be more careful. Anyone bothers you, get one of us,” he said all possessive like. Like he had a right to her, to protect her, or act like they were an item.

  “Yeah right,” she said and walked away from him.

  Rome slammed his hand against the wall and lowered his head. His cock was super hard in his jeans, his heart was racing. He wanted her. Wanted to feel how wild she made him. Wanted to explore her voluptuous body and pound his cock into her, marking her and claiming her as his woman. What the fuck? He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t, yet he had just grabbed her and kissed her like that because she got him all fired up. He shook his head and exhaled. He needed to get his shit together. He was still coming down from his last tour, from the loss he sustained, and those feelings that were beginning to really eat him up inside. He couldn’t possibly look at Cherise as a means to forget the past, to move on to a new life with her and his brothers. Could he?

  “Hey, what’s going on?” Kenny asked him, coming down the hallway with his brow furrowed.

  “Nothing,” Rome said and stood up straight.

  His brother looked at his lips. “You have lip gloss on your mouth. You kissed her?” he asked with his hands on his hips.

  “This is crazy. Fucking crazy how she drives me insane and then denies it.”

  Kenny pursed his lips. “She isn’t taking us seriously at all. She thinks we’re looking to get laid,” Kenny said.

  “Can’t blame her. It isn’t entirely false,” Rome said and felt like a dick for saying that. It wasn’t true. He wanted her. Would love to share her with his brothers, but he felt incapable of letting down his guard and letting go like that. He could be the one standing in the way of his brothers’ happiness with Cherise, and her happiness with them.

  “I’m leaving,” Rome said.

  “Hold up, don’t go. We need to do this together. To make her see we want a relationship with her and are ready to commit.”

  “I’m not ready to commit to anything. I’m holding y’all back. Go for it, and leave me out of it,” Rome said and headed out.

  “He left? Why?” Eric asked.

  Kenny was pissed off. His brother was hurting. He hadn’t explained anything about the last mission, just that he was done and he had handed in his papers. Everything was going through. He just needed to leave for a couple of days to finalize things on base.

  “Hey, why?” Eric pushed, and Landon stood close to them as well, looking just as concerned.

  “He kissed her. Back by the hallway, and it must have been one hell of a make-out session, because he was in a state and panicked.” Kenny glanced toward where Cherise was, and of course their buddies were talking to her and flirting. Their comments earlier about her sexy body nearly had Landon and Eric losing their shit, but they knew they couldn’t. Cherise wasn’t their woman.

  “What the fuck did he do? Piss her off more? Make her feel like an object, like all the other fucking guys around this place?” Eric asked, raising his voice.

  “Calm the fuck down,” Kenny said to him, and Cherise came by to get more drinks from the bar.

  Eric slid his palm up her back under her hair, and she tensed up, turning to look up at him with fire in her eyes. “Any particular reason why you’re touching me?” she asked him.

  Kenny was shocked. She was obviously affected by the make-out session with Rome as well.

  “Don’t give me an attitude, Cherise. I want to know what happened between you and Rome. Why did he leave?” he asked her.

  Her eyes widened, and she looked around them as if checking to see if he left. She firmed her lips and exhaled. “Why would I know? Rome does what he wants and thinks people will just follow his lead.” Ade placed the beers and cocktails on her tray. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m working,” she said, and he released his hold and watched her walk away.

  Kenny shook his head. “They’re both pissed off,” Kenny said.

  “Both denying this attraction. How the hell did we screw this up so bad?” Landon asked.

  “Rome screwed it up. We were on board from the get-go. Maybe it has something to do with her past? With whomever she dated or had as lovers,” Eric said and took a slug from his bottle of Heineken.

  “Could we not talk about her having lovers?” Landon asked.

  “We’re screwed. You two know that, right? So fucking screwed,” Kenny said and then brought his beer to his lips and kept his eyes on Ch
erise.

  “You don’t look happy,” Ivy said to Rome as he sat with her outside by the pool area. Keller, Bronc, Angus, and Johnny were working, and Rome came by to spend time with her before Faith came over.

  He firmed his lips and looked out toward the open land in the backyard of his buddies’ home. “I’m fine, Ivy.”

  “No, you aren’t. Talk to me,” she said and tucked her leg underneath her bottom and got more comfortable on the couch outside.

  He sat forward and stared at her. His sister was beautiful, brave, and capable. She also had their best friends wrapped around her little finger.

  “Is it hard, trying to transition back to civilian life after being in the military for so long?” she asked.

  He felt that sensation in his chest. A tightness he would get thinking about retiring and how it was happening.

  “Yeah,” he said to her.

  “I couldn’t imagine. Not that it’s the same thing, but when I was going to take on singing at Black Jack, and getting an opportunity to pursue a dream, I feared the changes that would come. I feared not knowing if I could still work at Harper’s with my friends, still work at the gym with all of you guys, and well, I feared the things that could go wrong. Kind of crazy how one person almost destroyed it all for me,” she said, and tears filled her eyes.

  He reached out and took her hand. “Don’t talk about it.”

  The tears fell. “I haven’t talked to anyone about it. I don’t want the guys to worry, and Johnny gets all concerned for my heart if I get worked up.” She shook her head. “I’m fine though. I’m strong, and the doctors told me nothing is wrong with my heart.”

  “They worry because they love you. You should talk to them.”

  She shook her head. “I don’t want them to worry more. Is that what’s going on with you?” she asked.

  He squinted at her. “What do you mean?” he asked and released her hand.

  “Are you fearing what life might be like after what you experienced as a soldier? Are you going to miss the danger and being there for your friends?”

  He was silent a moment. “All of the above and then some.”

  “You lost friends, didn’t you? I know you were hurt, and you didn’t contact us or let us know, and you seem sad and distant, like you fear getting close or letting down the walls.”

  He was shocked that she knew what he was feeling.

  “I’m here for you if you want to talk about it. I mean, I can sort of understand, I wasn’t armed, and I wasn’t expecting Madison or anyone else for that matter to try to kill me, but it happened. I was so happy right before that moment the shot rang out. So happy,” she said and looked toward the yard.

  “I know what you mean. Things had been going right for us, for my troop, and I was pleased because we did what we needed to do. We got comfortable, and when the shit hit the fan, we were ambushed out of nowhere.” He shook his head.

  “Gavan fucking blew up right in front of me, eight others lost their lives, and I probably should have died there too, but I was so angry, so pissed off, I just kept shooting and shooting, taking hit after hit to my vest and then my leg, and when I thought I wasn’t going to make it, the others appeared, firing their weapons. We took the enemy out, and we got to go home. Gavan, the others—they didn’t.”

  She swallowed hard and hugged his arm as they leaned back against the couch together. “Oh God, Rome, that must have been so scary and terrible to experience. You were shot? You didn’t even tell us,” she said.

  He slapped his leg. “Right here. Got myself a little limp sometimes, but I’m working on it.”

  “I guess we share getting shot in common now too, huh?” she asked.

  He turned to look at her. “Sweetie, you never should have gotten shot. That was crazy shit that night. I won’t ever forget it, nor the look in your eyes, the shock on everyone’s faces, and your men, my buddies as tears filled their eyes and the doctors said you might not make it. It was insane, and just goes to show you how life can change in a flash.”

  “I know that. I truly do, and it’s one of the reasons why I don’t want to ponder over the fears I have, the nightmares about that night, and the insecurities I hide from the guys. I know that I got a chance at life. That Madison didn’t win, so why would I not take advantage of living, of having this opportunity to be loved by them, cherished by them, and to enjoy life? Why waste the time on those fears, those bad memories, and not just go for it, ya know?” she asked him.

  “You’re inspirational, do you know that?”

  She chuckled. “I doubt that. I’m not comparing our pain or our experiences. I would never understand that fear, that anger of the situation you and your troop were in, but the end decision is the same. You’re here. You’re alive and well. You should live your life, Rome. Live because who knows what tomorrow might bring.”

  Chapter 3

  Kenny spotted Cherise getting out of her blue jeep. She wore a short jean skirt, a sleeveless blouse in green, and low heeled sandals. He couldn’t take his eyes off her. She looked up as he waited for her on the sidewalk. He was heading to the MMA gym to start a class in thirty minutes.

  “Hey, Cherise,” he said to her, and she gave him a smile.

  “Hi, Kenny.”

  “Nice day out, huh?” he asked as she stopped in front of him.

  “It sure is. Hoping tomorrow will be as beautiful as the weathermen say. The outdoor concert is still on, right?” she asked as they walked together.

  “I believe so. Are you going to be attending?”

  “I think so. How about you?”

  “Not sure. It’s up to my brothers. I know our sister wants to go and was hoping we could all set up a spot like we did a couple of years ago.”

  “That would be fun. Different times, back then,” she said and looked away. He touched her hand, and she paused. He reached up with his other hand and cupped her cheek.

  “Not so different. There were great memories made then. Bet we can make some new ones together.” He held her gaze. Those stunning hazel eyes drew him in. The scent of her shampoo and the sight of her full breasts in the top she wore made him feel possessive of her. He pulled her closer. Her scent filled his nostrils and aroused him. “Baby, talk to me. Tell me what you’re thinking right now. Please?” he asked her.

  She gulped. “You and your brothers can’t keep doing this to me. Making me feel things and then wonder if you’re sincere or just looking for action.”

  “Shit, Cherise, we aren’t like that. And you feel the same attraction we do. We get wild when we kiss you and feel you in our arms.”

  “But you want sex, not a commitment. I know that. It’s why we’ve avoided this, and it’s why we have to still avoid it.” She went to step back, but he just couldn’t get himself to release her.

  He gripped her hips. “Please try to understand that things were different last year. Rome was still active duty. He’s retiring now. He’s staying put.”

  Her eyes widened, and he stroked her skin under her blouse against her ribs.

  “I don’t want to get hurt. I don’t feel like you and your brothers are on the same page when it comes to me.” He narrowed his eyes at her. “I’m not denying the attraction. I’m keeping it real. We aren’t at the same place still.”

  “That isn’t true. We worry about you, want to protect you and make you our woman. Hell, Cherise, that night you got drugged was terrible for us. We couldn’t stop thinking about all the things that could have gone wrong. How you could have wound up raped, taken and God knows—”