by M. E. Gordon
I finally let him have sex with me. Hopefully, that would be enough in his book. He’d cross me off his list and move on. I needed the asshole Kane back fast, so I could snap back to reality.
With whatever strength he had left, he lifted me up with his hands around my rib cage and off of him. Releasing my tight hold, I let my hands slide down his chest as he placed me on the ground. My dress fell back into place around my legs. He let me go and pulled his boxers and pants back up, only buttoning them, the belt hung to either side and his fly was still down. More sweat escaped his body, putting off a scent that was intoxicatingly delicious. We stood across from one another, silent. What do you say after something like that?
“Kane, I think we should just...cherish this and move on. It was great but--”
“Shut the fuck up, Kitty. We’re not going to forget this. We will cherish it, and we’re going to do it again and again and again,” he said as that wicked grin came across his face.
Why can’t he be an ass about this? I guess I’m going to have to do it. “No we’re not. I can’t do this with you, Kane,” I said, reaching down to grab my underwear and put them back on.
“What is your problem? You need to tell me, so I can understand, because you’re acting like a lunatic. Are you psychotic or something? You got two personalities, one that hates me and one that wants to fuck my brains out. I don’t get it.”
Grabbing my hair in frustration, I pulled it back out of my face and into a ponytail, resting my hands on my hips when I was done. Then I took a deep breath.
“Hello, anyone in there?” Kane demanded. “We just had fucking amazing sex against a wall, in a hallway and I’d like to know that I’m going to get it again.”
“Kane, I can’t,” I said softly.
“Kitty, I swear to god, if you don’t start talking to me--”
“My mother committed suicide, all right?” I yelled at him to shut him up. I hadn’t said that out loud in over four years. It was still fucking awful.
He stilled and stared at me. “That sucks but what the hell does it have to do with me?” he demanded.
“I don’t want to be like her. I don’t want to follow her path, and I want to do the complete opposite,” I croaked.
“Caroline, you’re not her--”
“Yes, Kane, if I allow myself to go down this road with you, then I’m just like her. I’ll give up everything that makes me, me, and I’ll follow you. I’ll be miserable, you’ll be an ass. I’m terrified of turning into her so much, that I’m walking away from what could possibly be best thing for me. She ruined me. She acted like everything was fine, but she wasn’t, and instead of doing something to change it, she copped the fuck out and took the easy way out, leaving my father and me to pick up the pieces.”
“Are you listening to yourself right now? You. Are. Not your mother, but you are copping out--you’re just doing it in a different way.” He was trying to convince me, but I had blinders up and wasn’t paying any attention. “You’re not even going to give this a chance, are you?” he asked, straightening up.
I shook my head. “Give what a chance, Kane? I’m leaving in a month and a half. I have an interview back in New York next week. You can’t keep it in your pants. I have commitment issues. We’re a fucking mess.”
As I spoke, his face looked like I had tossed a brick at his gut. “You’re leaving? You can’t leave. B needs you here,” he bellowed.
“I haven’t told him yet. Please don’t say anything. I don’t belong here, in a small town. I miss my home. New York is my home. Since my mom betrayed me, it’s been home, and I want to go back.”
“You’re a fucking liar. You’re going to stand there and preach to me about taking the easy way out. New York isn’t your home. It’s where you used to live. Your home--” He paused, taking a step toward me, his hand cupping the back of my neck over my hair. “Your home is here, with B, with the guys, with me. You can deny it all you want, but you know I’m right.”
“I care about you. Is that what you want to hear? Do you want to hear me say that you’re right about everything? ’Cause you are. Let’s give Kane a trophy because he’s figured me out. It doesn’t matter what you say. I’m not changing my mind about this. When I’m kissing you, I see it all--” I paused momentarily, not sure if I even wanted him to know this. It was just going to make things harder. “I just want to have a good time while I’m here. When I move back to New York, you’re not even going to miss me.”
He dropped his hand from around my neck and took a step back.
I hate this.
“All right,” he finally said, crossing his arms.
CHAPTER 22
Kane
“No matter what I say, I’m not going to convince you. I don’t want to ruin whatever it is that we have, so I’m going to back off.”
That tasted so fucking sour.
“Okay, I think this is the best for both of us. We got all the sexual tension out of the way and we can move on.” She was lying again--fuck if she wasn’t a horrible liar. Her nose always scrunched up right after she did. “Will you answer one question, before we put this all behind us?” She bit her bottom lip, her eyes stayed glued to the floor.
“Shoot, Kitty,” I replied.
“Did you really stop sleeping around?” she asked, scrunching her face up.
That question could go one of two ways. The first, I could say yes. I could tell her the truth that I couldn’t get it up for anyone but her. Now, if I answered yes, she could react in one of two ways. The first, hopeful that maybe we could make this work. The second, it could frighten her to the point where she didn’t even want to talk to me, and I couldn’t have that.
My second option, lie my ass off. If I did this, it might make her decision to keep her distance, easier for her. She could also be disappointed that I had said I would give it up and basically, I would be proving her point of why we’d never work.
I’d never fallen for a girl before, not like this, not like her. For the first time, I didn’t want to be selfish. I wasn’t thinking about what I’d get in the end. I wanted to make this easier on her. I’d eventually get over her, but I couldn’t take having her upset and terrified that she was like her mother, whether I thought it was crazy or not. So, I did what I thought she wanted me to do, I was that asshole she was always accusing me of, and I lied.
“Come on, Kitty, you believe that?” I asked, winking at her.
Her face brightened as she looked up at me. “I knew he was full of it,” she replied.
“Who told you I was being celibate? Trent, or was it JJ?” I asked.
“It was my father, to be honest.”
I snickered to myself. “No shit.”
“We need to keep this quiet. I don’t want anyone to know that, we...umm...keep your mouth shut, Kane, or I’m going to grease up my vice clips. Get my drift?” she said, clearly threatening my precious balls.
“Loud and clear, Kitty.” I bent over to fix my belt and zip up my jeans. I retrieved my shirt, putting my arms through the holes. I paused before putting my head through. “All right, you can’t do that,” I said, taking her off guard.
“Can’t do what? I’m not doing anything,” she shrieked, clearly embarrassed that I had just called her out.
“You can’t look at me like that anymore, like you’re trying to decide which part of my body you want to lick first. That can’t happen, because this happens when you do that,” I said, gesturing to the bulge in my pants, after I pulled my shirt all the way on. My cock was straining against my jeans again. This was going to be a long fucking month and a half.
***
“It’s got to be 100 degrees out here,” JJ said wiping the sweat off his brow.
We had just finished up working for the day and were packing up when JJ’s phone rang.
“It’s Kitty,” he said, looking over at me. “What’s up, Cuz?’ he asked. “Yeah, I know where that is...You want us to come?...Oh yeah, she is...Count us in. I’ll be by t
o pick you up in twenty, that good?...All right, see ya.”
I stared at him from across the truck. His face had lit up like a freaking light bulb. “What was that about?” I asked, dumping a bottle of water over my face.
“Kitty wants us to take her to the lake. You up for it?”
Hell, yeah, I was up for it. Sitting back in a chair, watching her fine ass frolic along the shoreline? Wouldn’t miss it for the world. “Yeah man, I’m all about watching her walk around in a bathing suit, dripping wet,” I replied, running my hand through my soaked hair.
“Bad news, Nate’s meeting her there for a date, with his sister and her friends. Supposedly, they are big fans and just turned my favorite kind of eighteen.”
She would do that, go on a date with him, and drag us along?
“Whatever. Doesn’t mean I can’t look.” I jumped in my truck. JJ did the same. He called the rest of the guys, telling them to meet us there. We headed for the bar to pick up Kitty, so we could escort her on a date.
The weeks that had followed our sex-capade in the hallway were pretty normal. We went right back to the way things were. She never brought it up and neither did I--because I liked my balls. She was gone for two days, for her interview. B didn’t take it too well. He was in a pissy mood from the moment she told him she was still leaving at the end of summer. She came back, hopeful and rejuvenated, so it must have gone well. She informed us that they’d be calling her in the next week or two. It was now the second week and her perky disposition had deflated--big time. I was currently sporting a new bruise on my shoulder and poor Reece almost got his ear ripped off.
I still didn’t understand why she thought being with me was going to make her think she was her mother. From what I had learned from JJ in casual conversation, her mother had given up her career to raise Caroline. B was working late nights and was always tired, and they drifted apart. By the time anyone started noticing, Caroline’s mother was already on loads of meds. One night she made a lethal decision and put herself to sleep. No one saw it coming, not B, not Caroline, not even her mom’s close friends. Total blindside.
For this reason, and this alone, I could see why Caroline was so pissed. But to disappear for four years, not even visit her father, and from what I could tell, she acted like her mother never existed. She wasn’t dealing with it the right way, but I was not a fucking psychiatrist, so who the fuck knew?
“You really got a thing for her, don’t you?” JJ asked, pulling me out of my thoughts and back into the cab of my truck. His out of the blue question put me on edge.
“Nah, man, I just hate that she won’t give it up.”
JJ adjusted himself in his seat, so he could get a good look at me. “You’re my best friend. I know you, and I know you’re fucking into her. It’s painfully obvious. You’re constantly watching her. You get in a pissy mood if you don’t see her, and I swear I hear you calling her name in your sleep, unless of course, you know someone else by the name of Kitty.”
Shit, I’d been had. “It’s not--ah fuck, it is. She’s got me by the fucking balls, dude. Do the other guys think the same?” I asked, secretly praying they didn’t. I didn’t need Reece knowing and giving me shit for the rest of my life.
“Secret’s safe with me. They don’t have a clue. Have you even gotten close?” he asked.
I wanted to shout it from the roof, that yes I had, and yes it was fucking amazing, but I didn’t, because, again, I liked my balls. “Kissed her twice, but she’s holding out on me still, felt up her ti--”
“Enough!” he shouted, cutting me off. “I don’t need to know anymore. Go easy on her. She’s been through a lot of shit.”
Sadly, I knew that already.
We stopped by the house, got our swimming shorts, chairs, and a cooler filled with beer. When we pulled up to the back of the bar, Caroline was sitting under the patio waiting for us. She was wearing the same dress she had on the night she finally let me in, in more ways than one. Stopping the truck, we both jumped out, slamming the doors closed behind us.
“So you have us chaperoning now? What the hell is that about?” I asked, with a snicker to my voice.
“I just didn’t want to go alone. You guys are like brothers and I’d like to have you there for backup.”
Backup? What the hell does she mean by that? What the fuck does she mean by brothers? If that’s the case, and she thinks of me like a brother, then we have committed a disgusting crime, and I still want to fuck my sister.
“What do you mean by backup?” JJ asked, taking the words out of my mouth.
“Nothing. I just want you guys to come and have a good time, plus he’s bringing his sister and her friends.” There she goes again scrunching her nose up--liar.
“Whatever, I gotta piss, then we can go,” JJ said, walking in the bar and leaving us standing there alone.
“So, what’s really going on? I know you’re lying about why you want us there. Is Nate bothering you?” I asked.
I had ignored it as much as I could, but she was hanging out with Nate a lot. Seeing them kiss the Fourth of July had nearly given me an aneurism. I hated the guy and I hated the fact that he was free to date her and kiss her, but I wasn’t. I was one jealous SOB.
She was gathering her book and towel in her hands as I spoke. An anxious looked washed over her face, and I thought that she was going to be honest with me, but she quickly recovered and hid behind her wall. I’ll say it again. I never liked Nate Rodgers. He was a year older than us and was creepy as hell with his whole I’m-a-cop-you-can-trust-me act.
“Kane, it’s fine. Nate’s a guy, and just like you, he’s looking for more. I’m not going down that road with him, so things have been a little awkward. I just want to go, have a good time, and get my mind off everything.”
“Okay, don’t be surprised if I’m sporting a raging hard on while you prance around in a bikini, I’m warning you now. Try to contain yourself,” I said, wiggling my eyebrows.
Her laugh was music to my ears, and her vicious punch to my already sore arm was painfully pleasurable.
“All right, you ready?” We turned to JJ and nodded, smiles plastered on both our faces.
“I’m going to grab some wood for a fire,” I said, turning to do just that.
“Shot gun!” she yelled, running to the truck, passing JJ and hopping in the front seat.
“Fuck no, Kitty, get out! In the back with you,” JJ said leaning through the open window.
“Aww, please,” I heard her beg.
I glanced over at the truck, JJ was talking quietly to her. Her smile faded. She opened the door, jumped out, and got in the back.
Tossing some wood in the truck bed, I jumped in. Peeking in the rear view mirror, I saw that Kitty was sitting in the middle, her arms crossed, and a confused look on her face. JJ must have said something to the effect that he knew about us, that’s the only thing I could think of. She didn’t say a word the whole way there, seeming deep in thought. I’d glance in the mirror every so often and caught her quickly adverting her eyes.
This whole situation was fucked up. She clearly had issues, but to completely shut me out, just because she didn’t want to turn into her mother, was fucking ridiculous. The past three weeks she flirted with the guys, snuggled up with Trent--she’d do anything to put me out of her mind, that even included stringing along Robo-Cop. I hadn’t fully gone back to my ways, but every night I saw her, I’d come home horny as hell, and if there happened to be an extra laying around, I’d indulge. Was it good? Fuck no--it was just enough to get me off, cure a little itch to a big fucking rash.
As I pulled up, I saw Nate’s car and Trent’s truck. They had a bunch of chairs set up around a fire pit that had yet to be lit. About six girls in barely there bikinis were splashing in the water.
“Jesus Christ, these girls are here to get laid and I might have to indulge. You sure they are all eighteen?” I asked, leaning closer to the window to get a better look.
“Christ, I hope so,” J
J added, grinning in pleasure.
“You guys are fucking gross,” she yelled, getting out of the truck.
She slammed the door closed. I watched as she stalked over to Nate, wrapping her arms around his neck. She practically swallowed his face. I knew exactly what she was doing, and it wasn’t going to work. She thinks she’s going to make me jealous. She’s playing with fire. By the end of tonight, she was going to wish she hadn’t started this war with me.
CHAPTER 23
Caroline
Third beer, in thirty minutes. If I kept that up, I wasn’t going to be able to walk to the car. Under the cover of my black sunglasses, I sat on the beach, watching as Kane and the other guys made asses of themselves. They were chasing these barely there eighteen-year-olds up and down the beach and through the water. Nate was sitting next to me, our chairs butting up to one another’s. His fingers were playing with mine, and I was about one second away from ripping them away, when I caught Kane grabbing one of the girl’s ass.
Clenching my fists, I narrowed my eyes on him, still shielded by my sunglasses. He looked right at me while he did it, a stupid grin spread across his face. I instantly unclenched my fists and stood from my chair. I turned to face Nate, knowing my ass was facing the water, and knowing full well that Kane still had his eyes glued to me. I bent over painfully slow, leaning over Nate and resting my hands on the arms of his chair. I kissed his nose, wiggled my ass, then stood back up. Turning to the side so I could get a peek at Kane, I stretched my arms over my head, pushed my chest out, and arched my back. I heard a huge splash in the water and turned to it. Kane stood back up from under the water, his hands covering what I knew was his violent erection. Don’t mess with the Queen, because you’ll lose.