Finding Hope (Love's Compass Book 2)

by Snitker, Melanie D.

  ~

  Lance turned as the door to his workshop opened and admitted a tall, lanky man who cast a look around the room.

  “Can I help you?”

  “Hi. My name is Donald Karr.” He reached out to shake Lance’s hand. “I’m here to pick up some custom barstools my wife ordered.”

  “Sure. Let me grab those for you.”

  Lance retrieved the barstools along with the invoice. The woman who’d come in had found a single barstool she liked at a yard sale. She brought it in to see if he could recreate two more just like it. The barstool itself wasn’t particularly ornate, though it had been a challenge for Lance. He’d been happy with the end result. As always, however, it came down to what the customer thought.

  He set the barstools in front of Donald and indicated the first one. “This is the original. I repainted it so that all three matched, as per the agreement.” Lance waited while Donald inspected them.

  “These are fantastic. You did great work here. My wife will love these.” He checked the invoice, pulled his wallet out, and handed Lance his debit card.

  Lance gave a crisp nod. “I’ll go run this and be right back with your receipt.” When he returned, he helped Donald load the furniture into the back of his pickup. They used an old blanket to protect them from any damage during transport.

  Donald held a hand out and shook Lance’s. “Thanks again.”

  “You’re welcome. I appreciate your business.”

  Lance watched him leave and grinned. He whistled as he got back to work. Seeing a customer pleased with something he’d crafted with his own two hands was like a natural high. To know that the family would use that furniture for years to come made it even better.

  No wonder his dad enjoyed his work so much.

  ~

  Lexi had dreaded this for days.

  It’d been hard enough to act like herself at church that morning. Praise and worship had gone a long way in giving her the peace she craved, but knowing what she would tell her family that evening had her stomach in knots.

  Lance had gone to the same church as her family for years. This Sunday, he asked if he could take the seat next to her and she’d nodded her agreement. Having someone else there that shared her secret helped give her the strength she needed to make it through the service. When it was over and everyone was leaving, he leaned closer to her ear and whispered, “I’m praying for you tonight.”

  Now she was trying to relax at the Chandler house, but her family knew her too well. They hadn’t even gotten through the meal before her mom had thrown looks of concern across the table. Tuck questioned whether she was feeling okay.

  Apparently, she wasn’t as good at pretending all was well as she would’ve liked to think.

  Lexi could feel all eyes on her as she took a deep breath. She couldn’t put it off any longer. Reaching deep, she cleared her throat and told them all about her appointments.

  Patty covered her mouth with her hand, blinking quickly as tears filled her eyes. Grams clutched the compass locket that Gramps had given her many years ago. Her lips were moving and Lexi knew she was praying.

  Tuck looked like he was ready to tackle something while Laurie moved to put an arm around Lexi’s shoulder and gave her a squeeze.

  Her eyes fell on Serenity, who sat at the kitchen table and seemed to study everything else in the room.

  Lexi felt like she was suffocating under the emotional weight of the moment. “Come on, guys. I’m having surgery. We don’t even know for sure it’s cancer. You’re making me feel like I’m on my deathbed.”

  Grams joined Laurie and went to stand on the other side of Lexi. She put an arm around her granddaughter. “She’s right. Together, we pray. We pray that the doctor has wisdom and that the tumor is benign. And we’ll continue to pray every step of the way.”

  Lexi let herself lean into the older woman and soak up all the strength she could. “Thanks, Grams.”

  Patty went forward and hugged Lexi tightly while Tuck gave her a reassuring nod.

  Movement at the doorway captured Lexi’s attention. Gideon stood there, his eyes flitting from one person to the other. After a moment, he walked forward to put his little arms around as many people as he could.

  That had all of them laughing as they moved to include him in what had ended up being a group hug. Lexi knew he didn’t understand what they’d discussed before the giant show of affection, which made the boy’s hug all the sweeter.

  ~

  When Lexi spotted Lance in the cafeteria the following week, her mood improved tenfold. Once he’d seen her, he got up and chose something for lunch.

  They met again at the table, slid into their chairs, and began to eat.

  “Do you keep a schedule of the cafeteria meals on your fridge at home?”

  Lance chuckled. “No, on the bulletin board at the shop.” He raised an eyebrow at her and she wasn’t sure whether or not he was kidding.

  “And do you like Mexican food, too?”

  “I like almost any kind of food.” He jabbed his enchilada. “Though today, they are pushing my envelope a bit.”

  It was her turn to laugh now. “It does look a little like rubber.” She took a bite out of one of her tacos and pointed to it. “Stick with the basics. It’s safer.” She studied him over her plate. “What brought you all the way over here today?”

  “I wanted to see how you were doing. Tuck said Sunday night went well. I imagine it was still a huge shock to your family.”

  “It was. But they all handled it pretty well. I’m just glad that’s over. I was dreading it and I think the apprehension was worse than the night itself.” She paused, giving him a small smile. “And I’m doing okay. Thank you for asking.”

  Lance took another bite of rice and pushed it to the side of his plate. “I’m glad.” He laid his fork down. “I was thinking about your surgery. I’d like to be there. I wanted to make sure you were okay with that and it didn’t make you feel uncomfortable.”

  His words wrapped around Lexi like a soft blanket. She liked the idea of Lance being there while she was in surgery. “I appreciate that. Thank you.”

  A slow smile spread across his face and his blue eyes fastened on her. “Good.”

  “You could have called and asked me. You didn’t have to make a special trip for the mediocre Mexican food.”

  “I don’t think you’ve officially given me your phone number. I didn’t want to stalk.”

  Lexi snorted in an un-lady-like fashion and covered her mouth with her napkin. “We’ve known each other forever, Lance. I remember when you and Tuck destroyed my POG collection. I wouldn’t consider a phone call from you to be stalking.”

  Lance had the good sense to appear embarrassed. “I always felt bad about that. We didn’t set out to ruin your entire collection. They were perfect for setting fire to with magnifying glasses. In retrospect, we should have moved the rest of the collection away from the burn zone.” He stroked his goatee, a sheepish smile on his face. “If it helps, my dad grounded me for a week because I was careless with fire.”

  “That helps a little.” Laughing, she got a card out of her billfold and handed it to him. “Now you have my phone number. Officially and all that.”

  He tipped his head and smiled. “Thank you.”

  They spent the rest of their lunch making fun of some of the other phases they’d gone through as kids before going back to work again.

  ~

  The night before her surgery, Lexi stared at the hotel ceiling and sighed. She’d been trying to sleep for hours with no luck.

  Checklists kept popping up in her mind. She’d gotten everything squared away at the hospital in Kitner and would return to work in a week — possibly less. All of that assuming, of course, that she didn’t have to have a hysterectomy.

  She’d shared her situation with Kate and made her promise to keep the details to herself. If everything went Lexi’s way, there was no sense in alarming her coworkers. She was having a minor surger
y and that’s all they needed to know.

  Patty and Grams had taken their nervous energy and focused it on cooking. Over the last few days, they’d managed to stock her freezer with all kinds of easy meals that Lexi could reheat when she got hungry.

  She had to be at the hospital in five hours. All she needed to do in the morning was get dressed and make sure everything had made it back into her duffel bag.

  There was a noise at the door. Lexi held her breath. When she heard it again, it sounded more like a knock. She slipped out of bed and padded over to it, peeking through the peep hole. Her mom was standing outside. She released the locks and opened the door.

  “You can’t sleep either, huh?” Patty gave Lexi a hug.

  “My mind won’t give me a chance.” Lexi sat on the edge of the bed and Patty joined her. “Every time I relax and start to fall asleep, my brain plays the ‘What if’ game. What if they can’t remove the mass? What if it’s worse than they think? What if I have to have a hysterectomy?”

  Patty’s eyes were filled with tears. “Oh sweetie, I’m sorry you’re going through this.”

  “I’m sorry you are, too, Mom. After everything with Dad, you shouldn’t have to be dealing with this again. It’s not fair.” She balled up her fist, squeezing as tightly as she could. “Getting cancer wasn’t my fault. Still, I can’t help but wonder if there were some foods I should have avoided, or vitamins I could have taken to strengthen my immune system.”

  “Shoulda. Woulda. Coulda. They’re dangerous words, Alexis. And none of them do you a bit of good.”

  “I know.” She did, too. Every time her mind tried to go off on a tangent, she did her best to pull it back and focus on the task at hand. She prayed again for strength and for peace — something she’d been doing every time she felt her courage start to slip. She glanced at the clock on the nightstand. “Grams will miss you.”

  Patty and Grams had decided to share a hotel room to cut down on cost. “She was awake, too. I told her I was coming over to check on you.”

  Lexi nodded. “I hope Gideon’s doing okay in the hotel tonight. I’m worried about Serenity. She won’t talk to me.”

  “Don’t take it personally. She’s not talking to any of us about your surgery. I think there’s something she’s struggling with right now. I don’t know if it’s because of the way we lost your dad, or if it’s another issue completely. When she’s ready, she’ll let us know.”

  “You’re probably right.” Lexi leaned over and let her head rest against Patty’s shoulder. “I love you, Mom.”

  “I love you, too, Alexis.”

  They visited for another half hour before Lexi insisted Patty go back to her room and at least try to get some sleep before the surgery.

  When she bid her mom a good night, Lexi retrieved a tablet from her bag, pulled the comforter off the bed, and curled up on the small plush chair in her room. If sleep wasn’t going to happen, she could at least have one of her favorite books to occupy her mind until the sun came up.

  Chapter Five

  Lexi changed into the gown the nurse had given her and tried to get comfortable on the hospital bed. She nodded that she was ready and Patty went to open the door. The rest of the family gathered around her bed, Lance coming in right behind them.

  Gideon was squinting, his eyes riveted to the floor at his feet. He was calm, which said a lot since he rarely did well in medical settings. Squinting like that was his way of handling a situation that was visually overwhelming to him.

  She smiled at him. “Hey, Gideon. Thanks for coming to see me.”

  He turned his head to look at her, his eyes little slits. Serenity tightened an arm around his shoulder and gave Lexi a tentative smile. “He’s worried about you.”

  “I’m good, buddy. You don’t need to worry about me.” She moved her right arm to hide the IV as best she could. “I’m more than ready to get this ball rolling, though. Is it cold in here, or is it just me?”

  Patty produced a blanket and spread it out over Lexi’s form.

  “Thanks, Mom.” The blanket did little to help and she realized it had to be her nerves that were prompting her shivers. Her eyes roamed the room, pausing at each of the people who had taken time to come and see her: Patty, Grams, Tuck, Laurie, Serenity, Gideon, and Lance. She received smiles, nods, winks, and thumbs up. “You all didn’t have to come, but I appreciate it.”

  Tuck held Laurie’s hand with one of his and elbowed his best friend in the ribs with the other. “If you have any trouble back there, let us know, and we’ll come in with guns blazing.”

  “In a heartbeat,” Lance agreed.

  “I have no doubt you guys would do that, too. Don’t worry, I’ll call if I need the cavalry.”

  The door opened and the doctor entered followed by the anesthesiologist and a nurse.

  Lexi listened as they again explained what would happen in surgery. They wanted to see if she had any questions. When she assured them she didn’t, the anesthesiologist stepped forward.

  “I’m going to start medication in your IV to make you sleepy. You’ll still be awake when we get to the operating room, but you’re not likely going to remember it.”

  She held up a hand to stop him. “I’m a registered nurse. I know the drill.”

  “In that case, stop me if you need anything.”

  “You got it.”

  Lexi leaned back against her pillow and felt the sting as the medication entered her body through the IV, followed by warmth as it traveled through her blood stream.

  Grams stepped forward to take her hand. “Let’s pray.” When everyone had bowed their heads, she began. “Our heavenly Father, we ask that you surround Lexi with Your perfect love and peace. We pray for clear minds and wisdom for the doctors and nurses who will be performing this surgery. We pray that you place an angel in that operating room to give guidance to all involved. We ask that Your will be done.”

  Several murmurs of agreement echoed in the small room followed by a moment of silence before Tuck closed the prayer.

  “Thank you for carrying Your children through the challenges in life and for Your faithfulness. In the name of Jesus, Your Son, we pray, amen.”

  “Amen.”

  The word was uttered by the rest of the family in unison. The nurse and the anesthesiologist prepared her bed for transport. “We’ll take good care of her,” the nurse assured them.

  Lexi’s eyelids were getting heavy as the nurse wheeled her out of the room and into the hallway.

  ~

  Lance listened as Patty told the story of Tuck when he had his appendix removed as a child.

  “The doctors warned us he shouldn’t eat much for the rest of the day. But you know Tuck, he’s always hungry — and he eats a lot.”

  Tuck groaned and Laurie patted his knee sympathetically, a smile on her face.

  “She’s never let me live this down. I was seven.”

  His mother chortled as she continued. “He was resting on the couch and we were keeping an eye on him. The next thing we know, he’s in the kitchen eating a sandwich and diving into a bag of chips. How the boy moved that swiftly after a surgery, I still don’t know.”

  Laurie shook her head and gave Tuck’s leg a squeeze. “You didn’t.”

  He shrugged. “I did. I had convinced myself I was starving to death.”

  Patty pointed at him. “And what the doctor predicted came true — you wound up sick as a dog, on top of having an incision.”

  “One of the most painful moments of my childhood.” Tuck placed a hand on his side. “I can honestly say that sandwich, no matter how good it tasted at the time, wasn’t worth it.”

  Grams’ laughter blended with the others. “It doesn’t surprise me. You never had a strong stomach. Not like Lexi. She takes after me. Our stomachs are made out of iron.” She shifted her legs and crossed her ankles as she prepared to tell her story.

  Lance thought back to the discussions that went on in his own family and they weren’t unlike this o
ne.

  Laurie seemed to enjoy every single one of them. He knew that she hadn’t had much of a childhood and she appeared to find the Chandler stories entertaining.

  He checked his watch. Lexi had been in surgery for just over an hour. The doctor said it could take as little as an hour and as long as three, it would depend on what situation she faced once she got inside.

  Serenity had taken Gideon down to the cafeteria a little while ago and they were walking around. The boy had been getting restless. She’d planned to be back soon as she didn’t want to miss the doctor when she came out with a report.

  Lance had a difficult time sitting there waiting for news himself. He’d been tempted to get up and wander, except he didn’t want to leave the rest of her family. He took comfort knowing Lexi was asleep and unaware of what was going on. He prayed that God would make His presence and peace known to her when she woke up.

  ~

  Lexi caught a few words as they filtered through the fog. Stable. Minimal. Dressing.

  People were talking, but she couldn’t tell how far away they were. She couldn’t open her eyes.

  An unfamiliar sensation in her lower abdomen made her flinch. Or at least she thought she flinched. It was a hot pressure, as though a heavy iron were sitting on her skin and slowly making its way through to the organs within. She tried to squirm but it made the pain worse and added a pinch of nausea to the mix.

  Or maybe she only thought she was squirming.

  Where was she, anyway?

  She searched through the murkiness of her mind and finally grasped onto a memory. She tried to pull it out of the dark just before everything faded again.

  The next time she woke up, she felt a hand on her arm. It was a struggle, but her eyelids lifted. She recoiled from the bright lights in the room.

  “Mom?” Her voice croaked and she cleared it. “Hey.”

  “Take it easy, sweetie. You’ve been coming in and out of the anesthesia for a while. Do you remember anything from before?”