Always and Forever

by Wendy Lindstrom

  Nancy smiled. “I’m glad you were right.”

  Laughs were shared and final goodbyes were said and Hal finally closed the door behind them and sagged against it with a loud groan. “I thought they’d never leave.”

  “What!” Nancy laughed. “You had a wonderful time and you know it.”

  He grinned. “I did. But I couldn’t wait to have our privacy back.”

  “Privacy for what?” she asked.

  “For snuggling on the sofa with my wife and our rascal cat.”

  Chapter Twenty-three

  As Nancy heated leftover baked chicken for lunch, she marveled that two weeks had already passed since she and Hal had taken the final step in their marriage.

  In all her fantasies of married life, Nancy had never dreamed it could be filled with such warmth and joy and passion.

  But it was — and she couldn’t be more content.

  The sound of the kitchen door opening told her that her husband was home. He’d started using the back door at lunchtime so he didn’t have to remove his boots. Taking them on and off took up precious minutes they could be sharing, and so Nancy gladly swept up after he headed back to work.

  “Something smells good,” he said, entering the kitchen and filling the room with his presence.

  Sawdust covered his clothing and perspiration stains wet the underarms of his shirt. His hair stuck out around a dirty old cap. But to Nancy, Hal was utterly handsome. He was so different now from the angry grieving man who’d met her at the train station. Despite his heavy workload and painful grief, Hal had softened and had learned how to laugh again. His natural disposition was actually playful and funny and romantic, and now he brought that charming side of him home to her each day. And that made him even more dashing and positively irresistible.

  Wearing a warm smile, he crossed the kitchen, the spark in his eyes telling her that he was as eager to see her as she was to see him. This tall amazing man was here to see her.

  He slipped his arms around her waist and drew her close. She went willingly and even arched her neck to receive his gentle kiss and playful nuzzle.

  "You smell like vanilla and peppermint," he said, his voice close and warm against her ear.

  She replied, "That's because I've been working in the garden this morning, so I rubbed peppermint leaves on myself to keep the bugs away."

  “That doesn't explain the vanilla."

  She laughed and directed his attention to a plate of cookies cooling on the sideboard. "I used vanilla in the cookies I baked for you this morning. I put a touch of vanilla behind my ears to make me smell better."

  "You smell delicious to me." He growled and nibbled her neck.

  She laughed and eased back in his arms. “If you keep dallying, Mr. Grayson, your lunch will burn. Unhand me so I can remove it from the oven.”

  With an exaggerated sigh, he released her. “I suppose I can eat while you read your letter.” He withdrew a paper from his shirt pocket and handed it to her. “It seems one Elizabeth Tremont has sent you a letter, and I must confess that I’m rabidly curious.”

  Nancy squealed with excitement as she plucked the letter from Hal’s hand. “I can’t believe my sister replied so quickly!”

  “Your sister?”

  Nancy nodded. “I sent her a letter a week ago,” she said, already fully engrossed in opening and reading the letter. She couldn’t wait to hear what Elizabeth thought of her marriage to Hal and to also receive news of home.

  My Dearest sister,

  I cannot express how relieved I am to have received word from you and to know you are well. Father is desperately ill and I beg of you to return home immediately. I miss you terribly and we will speak of your marriage and other topics upon your return.

  Come quickly!

  With deepest affection,

  Elizabeth

  Nancy clapped the letter to her chest and sank onto a kitchen chair, her knees too weak to support her. “This can’t be,” she whispered in disbelief. Her father couldn’t be ill. He was strong and... and, oh dear, he had collapsed once before and his health was so precarious those few weeks.

  Hal cupped her arms and knelt in front of her. “What is it?”

  “My father is ill and I need to return to Buffalo immediately,” she said, her voice flat, her thoughts sliding sideways. Images of her dear father on his death bed spun through her mind. She’d been with him during his last collapse and it had been terrifying... he’d nearly died. He could die now. Before she got home. She had to hold his hand and tell him she was sorry and let him know how much she loved him, that she hadn’t meant to hurt him.

  “I’m sorry, Nancy. I don’t have funds to take us both to Buffalo, but I’ll find a way to secure passage for you. I didn’t think Elizabeth was married,” Hal said.

  “What?” His words barely registered in the swirl of memories and worries muddying her thoughts.

  “Did your sister marry a Tremont?”

  “No.” Nancy shook her head, more to clear her thoughts than as an answer. “She isn’t married yet.”

  Hal’s forehead creased, lowering his dark brows. “Your sister is a Tremont?”

  Nancy nodded, wondering how quickly she could pack and if she could catch the afternoon train. The heat from the oven made her nauseated and she wanted to leave the kitchen.

  Hal tapped the table top, startling her.

  “How can Elizabeth be a Tremont if you’re a Mitchell?” he asked, the suspicion in his eyes becoming eerily reminiscent of when Nancy had first met him.

  Suddenly her thoughts crystalized and became clear. Ice filled her veins and her heart beat wildly in her chest. She froze as if she’d suddenly found herself caught in the sights of shotgun. Hal was staring at her, disbelief filling his eyes. There was no way out of the truth. She had unwittingly revealed her secret. The warmth that had been in Hal’s expression only moments ago was gone now, leaving behind stark eyes filled with questions and embers of anger.

  “You are twins, which means you have the same father,” he said, and she could see the dawning horror in his eyes and that he already knew the truth. He shoved himself away and back-stepped as if she’d suddenly become a poisonous snake. “Dear God, you’re Lloyd Tremont’s daughter?”

  Nancy rose to her feet, her legs quaking beneath her. “Yes, and he’s terribly ill. I’m sorry, Hal. I hadn’t meant to deceive you—”

  “But you did.”

  “I had no choice... that is... my father spoke of your family a number of times and how tragic it was that the Graysons had come to despise him and his bank and—”

  “With good cause,” Hal snapped. “He’s heartless and greedy and—”

  “Not the man I know!” She pressed a hand to her stomach, queasy from emotion and from hearing her husband speak such unkind words about a man who had given her everything. “I won’t defend myself, but I will defend my father because he is a good man. I know firsthand that he has helped a great many people. I don’t know what transpired between our fathers, but I know without doubt my father would never intentionally destroy another man or his business. You need to get both sides of the story before you make a wholesale judgement about a man’s character, Hal. Because the Lloyd Tremont I know is a kind and loving father and a generous business man. Whatever problem stands between you and me is of my own doing, not my father’s.”

  “Your father’s hand is in this whether you see it that way or not. You had to escape his unjust demands and so you ran off and made up a name to hoodwink my brother.”

  “Mitchell is my mother’s maiden name and I... I couldn’t tell your brother my real name or he wouldn’t have accepted me.”

  “Darn right he wouldn’t have!” Hal jabbed his finger her direction. “You lied to him and you lied to me. And knowing all of this, you let me marry you.”

  “I had to,” she said, quietly. “I had no other place to go. I wasn’t being entirely self-serving, Hal. I knew John was from a good family. Regardless what you think
of my father, he thought highly of your family. I fully intended to be a good wife to John. And when circumstances changed, I found myself with you and... and I desperately wanted a real, loving marriage with you.”

  “You let me come to care for you,” he said, hurt thick in his voice.

  “Hearing you say all of this aloud makes it seem so much worse, so dreadfully underhanded, but that was never my intent.”

  “But it was underhanded,” he said, his voice hoarse with emotion. “What else would you call it?”

  “A mistake.” Sizzling sounds and wisps of smoke came from the oven. The lunch she’d lovingly prepared for him was burning... just like his hatred of her.

  He snorted with disgust. “It’s far more than a mistake, Nancy. It’s a betrayal of everything I thought we were building. And what I find most appalling and—” He pinched the bridge of his nose as if willing himself not to lose his temper. “—and unforgiveable, is that you betrayed my brother.”

  Her heart banged in her chest and her body trembled. “I can imagine how you must see this, Hal. An apology seems insignificant in the face of so much injury, but I’m truly sorry.”

  “Do you realize that the legality of our marriage may be questioned because you married me under a false name?”

  A rush of moisture filled her eyes and she could barely squeeze words from her thick throat. “It’s legal to me.”

  Fists clenched, he glowered at her, his face red with anger and disbelief and... hurt. “Pack your bag. I’ll return in an hour to take you to the station.” In a two long, angry strides he’d crossed the kitchen and slammed out the back door of the house.

  Nancy sagged against the table, her heart pounding, regret, tears, and the smell of burning chicken clogging her throat. What had she done?

  An hour after he’d stormed out of the house, Hal returned home, no calmer than when he’d left. He could understand what had provoked Nancy to misrepresent herself to John Radford. Desperate circumstances led to desperate measures. Hal could fathom that. What he couldn’t understand, what he would never understand, is how she could have withheld the truth from him knowing he was falling in love with her. Hal had opened his heart and shared everything with her, his dreams, his regrets, his grief. Had none of that had been sacred to her?

  Had she felt anything for him at all? Or was that a lie, too?

  Nancy’s deceit outraged him and left him trembling with anger and hurt. It appalled him to think that he had married the daughter of the man responsible for putting his own father in financial jeopardy. But the thing that cut the deepest was that she’d known all of this while lying in his arms, while he whispered words of love and they made promises and created dreams together.

  Clamping down his outrage, Hal strode inside to get his deceitful bride and put her on a train as he should have done the day he met her.

  He went to the kitchen, retrieved a tin cup from the cupboard and filled it from the water jug on the sink. Gulping the cool liquid, he let it soothe his hot throat. Turning, he leaned against the sink expecting to see Nancy entering the kitchen.

  But the light sound of her footsteps was absent.

  A paper lay on the table beside a roasting pan of badly scorched chicken. Curious, Hal picked up the paper and realized with dread that it was a letter from Nancy.

  Dearest Hal,

  Knowing how you feel about my father and perhaps me as well, I am having Mary take me to the station. I hope your love for your brother will help you understand why I took the course I did. My intent was never to lie, defraud, or betray anyone. I only wanted to protect my sister. I hope over time you will find it in your heart to forgive me. As for whether or not our marriage is legal or binding, I will leave it up to you. In your arms I have found joy and love that I never expected and that I never want to lose, but I understand if you feel differently. I will await your reply to know whether or not I should return to Fredonia, and to you, upon the resolution of my father’s illness. Whatever you decide, please take loving care of yourself and Captain.

  With affection and deepest apology,

  Nancy

  With a curse, Hal slammed the tin cup onto the scarred tabletop. Water splashed across the table, the place he and Nancy had shared so many meals and conversations and plans. She had rolled her pie dough here. Hal had offered to sand and stain the top smooth and varnish it to a luster, but she’d begged him to leave it because it had character. She claimed the divots and scars in the table told a story and that they would add their own marks to the tale. And someday their children and grandchildren would become part of the tabletop legend. And so now he’d left his own mark in the top, one of anger and frustration and heartbreak.

  Tossing his cup in the sink, Hal strode out the back door, rounded the house and headed across the orchard to visit Mary Tucker.

  When Mary opened her door, she nodded as if she knew he wasn’t in the mood for tea and a cordial chat. “I see you have something on your mind, Hal. Come in,” she said, inviting him into her cozy kitchen where Hal and Nancy had shared joyful meals with Mary and William.

  He took a seat at the table across from her. “Did Nancy tell you what’s happened then?”

  Mary nodded. “She’s dreadfully concerned about her father.”

  “You took her to the station, I presume?”

  “Yes, after a visit to the watchmaker, we went straight to the station.”

  Hal’s jaw clenched. “Did she say why she needed to stop at the jeweler’s?”

  Mary shook her head. “She didn’t say, but I admit I thought it odd for her to take the time to shop when she was in such a hurry to catch her train.”

  Hal knew why she’d stopped at the jewelers and it wasn’t to shop. It was to sell another piece of jewelry. But she said she’d sold off everything, so what could she have offered the jeweler that — oh, no. Hal’s gut clenched with anger and hurt. She’d sold her mother’s ring... her wedding ring. It was the only piece of valuable jewelry she had left. He’d told Nancy he would find the funds to send her to Buffalo, so why did she sell a ring she held so dear to her heart? Because she hadn’t wanted to ask anything of him while he was so angry with her? Because she feared he wouldn’t let her travel to Buffalo? Or because she no longer wanted to be married to him?

  Mary reached across the table and squeezed his clenched fist. “I don’t know what’s going on, but I suspect it involves more than Nancy’s father. I think you should know, Hal, that she was extremely concerned with your wellbeing. She asked me to look after you and Captain.”

  Hal closed his eyes and shook his head. Regret, anger, outrage, and a myriad of emotions swirled through him and made him sick to his soul.

  She was gone. He had no idea what to do with any of it, and so he did the only thing he knew how to do — he got up and went back to work.

  For days he worked around the clock, his mind turning over the mess with Nancy. Time in the house was painful. The rooms were empty. Dishes were piling up in the sink again, and he didn’t care. The house was unbearably silent, devoid of Nancy’s presence and the sound of the out-of-tune pianoforte she loved playing. Even Captain wouldn’t come inside, preferring to hide in the barn rather than subject himself to Hal’s misery.

  The emptiness consumed Hal. It seemed forever ago that he and John had shared the house. The minute Nancy set foot inside, she’d filled it with light and love. It seemed even the house was missing her presence. When Nancy left, all sense of home left with her.

  Her absence cut a gorge through Hal’s chest. He missed her in the deepest part of his soul. But what she’d done was unforgivable — and he just couldn’t get past that.

  Chapter Twenty-four

  Granted a brief respite from her father’s bedside, Nancy wandered in the garden at her childhood home. Only she found no comfort there because the sprawling estate didn’t feel like home anymore. She’d been here eight days... eight long and painful days fraught with worry and heartache and regret. The large house was q
uiet and everyone’s focus had been on her father, allowing Nancy time for reflection without being barraged by questions. She’d given her mother and Elizabeth a short account about finding Mr. Grayson’s advertisement and that she’d found it preferable to her arranged marriage. She assured them that her decision had been a good one as she was quite happy with Hal Grayson.

  For the most part she had told the truth. She’d left out the part about John Radford, allowing them to think it was Hal who placed the advertisement in the newspaper. It wasn’t that Nancy was trying to cover up the truth but rather that she was too weary and heart sore to divulge the painful details.

  Thankfully, Nancy’s father was improving a bit each day and the grip of terror was easing in her gut. But part of her heart was dying. She hadn’t heard a word from Hal. Not one.

  Mary Tucker had sent a short letter, however, and Nancy was eager to read it. Anticipating word from home, she sat on a wrought iron bench beneath a young pear tree to read the letter. Birds twittered overhead and sunlight splashed down through the tree branches and warmed her shoulders.

  Mary shared news of her visit with Hal and her hope that whatever burdens Hal and Nancy were carrying would soon be lifted. She was keeping an eye on Nancy’s boys, as she referred to Hal and Captain, and taking Hal a hot meal each evening. She had taken in the clothes Nancy had left on the clothesline and placed them on the kitchen table for Hal. She had watered Nancy’s garden during the last two hot days and encouraged Nancy to hurry home as the vegetables were ripening and weeds were sneaking in.

  The thought of weeds taking over her little garden made Nancy cry. She didn’t know if that forty-foot stretch of tilled earth would ever again be her little garden. She missed Captain so badly it caused physical pain in her heart. And Hal... any thought of him, any memory of their time together sliced through her like one of his sharp gouges digging through a piece of basswood.

  She had found so much and had lost it all.