Beautiful Broken Rules

by Kimberly Lauren

  I took advantage of his appearance. “Hey Jace, how was class?” I asked, sliding closer to him and dropping Micah’s arm. “Thanks for saving me,” I whispered into his ear.

  “Just trying to avoid a fight.” He nodded toward the lunch line and then leaned forward to eat his food. Jaxon was pushing his tray through the line behind a couple of girls, looking directly at me. He looked angry.

  “Shit, shit, shit,” I continued whispering under my breath. “I knew I would be terrible at this.” When I motioned to get up and leave, Jace clamped a hand down onto my leg to keep me seated.

  “Don’t run away, Ems. He’ll be fine. Just relax,” Jace’s reassuring voice kept me in my seat.

  Jaxon walked up behind me and placed his tray down in front of me. He had gotten enough for the both of us. “Move it, Woods, you’re in my spot,” he said to Micah.

  “Dude, last time I checked, we didn’t have assigned seating,” he replied, scooting closer to me.

  “Micah, just move… please,” I said, trying to move away from him and bumping into Jace.

  Micah shoved his tray to the opposite side in front of me and got up to walk all the way around the table and benches. When he came back around and sat down, he eyed me curiously. Jaxon sat down in his vacated spot and, with his arm behind my back he gripped my hip and scooted me closer to him. Then he brought his arm back and started eating like nothing had happened. Quinn and Cole finally came to join us at the table as well, moving in next to Micah.

  I leaned into Jaxon. “I didn’t know if you wanted to stick around here or eat at home so, I didn’t grab any food,” I told him.

  “Do you want to leave?” he asked, motioning to get up.

  “You just bought all this food. We should at least eat it.”

  He situated himself back into his seat and shrugged noncommittally. I didn’t like that I felt like I was in trouble for something, like I needed to explain my actions. I hadn’t even done anything wrong. I placed my palms down on the table so I could push myself up taller. I gave Jaxon a quick peck on the lips and I watched as the tension left his face. He looked down at me and smiled, then gestured for me to eat as well.

  With a mouth full of food, Micah pointed his fork at the both of us. “What’s going on with you, Emmsie? You never dole out the affection.” Apparently, the extent of my nicknames at this school was never-ending; I hadn’t heard that one yet. I wasn’t a fan.

  “Not for you, Micah,” I responded vaguely.

  “Don’t call her Emmsie,” Jaxon shot a hard look at Micah while speaking.

  “What, you’re the only one that can call her something special?”

  “Just drop it,” I said to both of them. I noticed Jace stiffening up beside me.

  “I call her by her name, jackass. Not some cutesy nickname,” Jaxon replied anyway.

  “Emerson sounds like a dude’s name,” Micah retorted, and then a cocky grin spread across his face as he got an idea. Uh-oh I didn’t like that face. “When I’m pounding into her, I like to call out a chick’s name.” My mouth fell open at what he had just said.

  First, I noticed Jace’s fist clenching, and then I felt the air rush past my head as Jaxon’s body flew across the table. He took Micah down with him during his flight. Both of them grunted from the impact of the hard ground, although Micah took the brunt of it with Jaxon on top of him. I sat up to look over the edge of the table at the two of them down there. Jaxon was pummeling him in the face with his fists repeatedly. Micah was trying to bring his forearms up to block the punches.

  Jace swiftly scrambled over the table feet first and grabbed Jaxon by the collar of his shirt. I realized Jace had been anticipating this, because he scooped him up way too fast to have been surprised. Cole jumped up and helped Jace move Jaxon away from Micah. Cole stepped on Micah’s hand and twisted his foot to grind it into the ground on his way out. Micah didn’t say anything, but I saw him wince from the pain. Quinn shook her head back and forth at all of them. As the three of them were walking out of the cafeteria, Jace and Cole had their arms wrapped around Jaxon.

  “Fuck you, Riley!” Micah bellowed from his spot on the ground.

  I watched as Jace and Cole’s arms flexed from the brief struggle Jaxon put up. Then they continued out the door toward the parking lot, without even a glance back. It all happened so fast that not many people even noticed in the loud cafeteria. I think the only people that saw were those at our table, and one of the other tables that Jaxon and Micah fell between. Micah’s food was half on the table and half on the floor. He pulled himself back up on the bench and sat down in front of me again. His face didn’t look that bad, it was mostly just red. I knew if Jaxon wanted to, he could have done some real damage. He had his head bent forward looking down at his food.

  His angry eyes looked up at me, “You should stay away from him, Em. He’s insane.”

  “Only to assholes, Micah,” Quinn said from beside me, glaring at him.

  “I didn’t say anything I wouldn’t say any other day!” He lifted his hands in frustration.

  Garrett and a few of the other Frat guys slid down the bench toward us. “You know what you said, fucker, just drop it.” He eyed Micah.

  I looked down at my food for the next couple of minutes and picked at the turkey and ham sandwich. Micah may have been a jerk for what he said, but at the end of the day, he was right. I had allowed all of the guys to openly joke about our times together; hell, I was usually the one making the jokes. They didn’t know any better. I wanted to believe that Micah wouldn’t have said something like that if he had known I was with Jaxon now.

  “I’m sorry, Micah, that was my fault. You didn’t know.”

  His hard eyes shot to mine. “Didn’t know what, Em?” he angrily responded. He knew and he was trying to get me to say it out loud, but the coward inside of me couldn’t even do that.

  “You just didn’t know,” I sighed.

  Everyone had finished their lunch and vacated the building about fifteen minutes later. Quinn sat faithfully next to me the whole time, offering her silent support.

  “I don’t think I can do this, Quinny.”

  “You can and you will.” She looked at me with a serious expression.

  “Quinn, you can’t force me to be in a relationship,” I spoke through a laugh.

  “I can and I will.”

  “Cute…” I replied drily.

  “Em, I’ve never seen any of those guys look at you the way he does. I’ve never seen you look at any of those guys at all, really. You look at Jaxon though, and you let him in. Don’t quit now.”

  I sighed in defeat. She was right. The fact was that, I didn’t want to let Jaxon go or even be away from him, period.

  “Jaxon’s never going to be okay with the fact that I’ve slept with practically everyone.” I said.

  “He’ll have to learn, won’t he? Besides, you haven’t slept with EVERYONE. You haven’t slept with Jace or Cole,” she winked at me. “Let’s keep it that way, okay?”

  “Yes, ma’am.” I leaned my head on her shoulder. Quinn was good for my spirit. She knew what I was thinking before I even had to say it, and she knew how to ground me when I was becoming a flight risk.

  We walked out to the parking lot to get in our car when we noticed Jace and Cole standing around the truck talking. There was no Jaxon in sight.

  “Where is he?” I asked them, anxiously.

  “He hopped on the bike and left as soon as we got out here,” Jace said with a shrug, but I could tell he was worried about his brother.

  “Do you think that was the smartest thing to let him do when he’s pissed?”

  “I think he’s just pissed at himself,” Cole said.

  “At himself, why? I figured he was mad at me.” I was shocked.

  “He thinks he scared you,” Jace said looking a bit forlorn.

  “The only thing I’m scared of is him out there riding that thing while he’s got so much running through his head.” I pulled my cell ou
t of my pocket and brought up his name in my contacts.

  Me: Come back, please?

  Jace pulled down the tailgate and we sat on top of it next to each other. Cole pulled Quinn into the bed of the truck and tucked her into his lap. I heard him whispering into her ear, but I didn’t know what he was saying. I sat there swinging my legs back and forth, hoping that Jaxon was okay and that he would come back by here soon.

  “Em, I have a class to get to,” Jace’s voice sounded unsure. I knew he was wondering if he should stick around to make sure Jaxon was okay.

  “Go ahead, Jace. I’ll text you when he comes back.” I patted his leg.

  “Thanks, Em.” He leaned and kissed me on my cheek right before he leapt down off the tailgate. “Go easy on him, kay?” I nodded my head at him.

  After Jace said his good-byes, Quinn scooted out of the truck. “I have to be at my tutoring session in five minutes, I’ll see you at home?” she asked.

  “Man, I never got to finish my lunch. My stomach’s going to be growling the whole time, Quinn,” Cole complained.

  “You know you don’t have to sit through her sessions, right?” I teased.

  “As long as Bryce is her student, I do.”

  “You guys are over-protective cavemen,” I grumbled.

  “Come on babe, you can eat in the Tutor Hall Café,” Quinn said, while grabbing his hand. “Em, you can take the car, you should go home. Cole has his car.”

  “He’ll come back here. I’m going to wait.” I watched as they shrugged their shoulders and walked off.

  I was left alone on the bed of the truck. It’s ironic that I was just here yesterday hiding from Jaxon, and now I here I was hoping to find him. I scooted further into the bed and laid down flat on my back. The weather was unusually warm today and the sun felt good on my skin. I noticed a shirt balled up in the corner, so I reached over to grab it. It was Jaxon’s and I wondered when he had taken this off to toss it back here. I used it as a pillow under my head to help alleviate the discomfort of the ridges on the truck bed floor. The scent of his cologne helped me doze off in the comfort of the sun.

  I woke up with a start when I heard the loud rumble of a motorcycle engine. Jaxon was parking the bike next to the truck and pulling his helmet off. His eyes were already on me before the helmet was all the way off his head. He snapped the helmet straps around the handlebars of the bike. His backpack swung around the side of his body and he reached in to grab out that black ball cap. I sat up on my elbows to watch him. I adored when he wore that cap; he looked even more sexy than usual.

  “I love when you wear that,” I decided to tell him.

  “The cap?” he asked, looking surprised and I nodded to him. Then as he thought about something, he frowned at me, “You’re going to be sunburned if you’ve been lying out here the whole time.”

  “I knew you would come back. I wanted to be here,” I said quietly. “Ready to go home?” I scooted out of the truck.

  He gave me a confused look and then nodded his head. I got up and went around to the passenger side of the truck. I wasn’t even going to ask if we could ride on the motorcycle, since I knew the answer to that one. Jace and Jaxon carried both sets of keys with them at all times now. They were always switching out on each other without telling the other one. I think by now, Jace knew that if I was with Jax, the truck would be occupied. Jaxon followed behind and lifted me up into the seat. He stared into my eyes like he wanted to ask me something or he was waiting for me to say something. I leaned in and kissed him softly.

  The ride home was quiet. I couldn’t read him. I still didn’t know if he was mad at himself or me. His emotions were all over the place on his face. I grabbed a hold of his hand as we were walking up the stairs to the apartment. He pulled out his keys and let us into his place. He pulled me into his bedroom and laid me down on the bed. I started breathing heavily as he climbed above me. I was instantly turned on by his proximity. His body was the best kind of aphrodisiac. The only problem was that his face still held a lot of worry as he looked into my eyes. I reached up to smooth the lines under his eyes.

  “Beautiful, please just get it over with. Yell at me; tell me how mad you are, so I’ll feel a little better. Not that I deserve to,” he said in a rough beaten tone.

  “Huh? Why would I yell at you?” I questioned.

  He bent his head down into the crook of my neck as he spoke. “Because I acted like an idiot.”

  I shoved his cap off his head and ran my fingers through his soft hair. “Jaxon, all of that would have been prevented if I wasn’t such a coward.”

  “No babe, I shouldn’t have let that get to me.”

  “But it did and part of being your…just yours,” I had almost said the ‘g’ word, “I need to find a way to get over my insecurities and make you feel more comfortable.”

  I felt the side of his cheeks pull up into a grin when he caught me stuttering over that ‘just yours’ part.

  “No, I don’t want to make you move so fast that it scares you off again. I can handle it next time, promise. I just hate that they feel like they can touch you whenever they want and say whatever they want.”

  “I wouldn’t hate it if you touched me whenever you wanted to though.” I wiggled against him.

  “Hmm… damn, I’ll never get tired of you telling me that,” he said, while lifting my shirt up. His head bent down to take me into his mouth and I moaned, writhing against him to find relief. His sweet torment was going to be the death of me.

  Before I knew it, we were both completely naked and he was thrusting into me feverishly. It was strange being able to do this with him whenever I wanted to. I didn’t have to worry about my stupid rules. I didn’t have to worry that he was with someone else, because he was with me. I didn’t care if anyone else liked him, because he was mine. Because of those things, I got to pass my three-limit rule repeatedly.

  He grabbed my wrists with one of his hands and held them tightly above my head. He was driving so hard and fast it was almost impossible to concentrate on anything besides the euphoria he was building inside of me. I pulled my legs up so they went up over his shoulders and he turned his head to trail kisses up the inside of one of my legs. The contrast between his fast and hard movements, versus this sweet side of him, started pushing me over the edge. I clinched him hard inside of me and I heard him groan as his hand gripped me tighter.

  “Fuck, baby, do that again,” he panted. When I did, he let out a long groan.

  “Kiss me,” I gasped.

  His lips slammed against mine passionately. I couldn’t hold on any longer and I screamed out his name so loud that if anyone else were home, I would have been embarrassed. Jaxon was able to hold on for a couple more minutes, slowly building me back up. No one had ever revved me up this much.

  By the time he let go, I made sure my eyes were open to watch the ecstasy on his face. The pure pleasure in his eyes sent me over the cliff one more time. He had let my hands go in his release so I grabbed onto his back, sinking my nails into his skin with my back arched into him while riding out the waves. He finally collapsed onto the spot right next to me. I rolled over to lay my head on his chest while we both panted from exertion.

  His hand ran up and down my back softly. The soothing motion made my eyes heavy. I sat up to look at the clock because I had work tonight and Jaxon pulled me back down to his chest.

  “Shh, Beautiful… just sleep, I’ll wake you in time.” He leaned down to kiss my forehead.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Boyfriend?

  The weeks until winter break flew by. I thought it was best if we stayed away from the parties for the rest of the semester. Jaxon didn’t argue with me. I think he felt like he couldn’t yet control the urge to punch other guys who got too close to me. It was nice to be able to go out without the added drama of other people. I also still wasn’t able to admit we were in an actual relationship, so if we didn’t hang out around others, I didn’t have to define it. Jaxon never brought it up
either. We’d had a lot of time to open up with one another, and he finally told me about his dad dying and how hard it was for him to cope afterward. It seemed like a good time to tell him about my parents, but I just couldn’t do it.

  We hadn’t seen each other too much this week, besides at nighttime after one or the other got off work. We entered finals week and I realized it was too hard to study around Jaxon, so I forbade him from coming over to distract me. It seemed to work out for the best because we both felt extremely confident about our grades.

  On Thursday after our last final, all five of us were hanging out at the guys’ apartment watching movies and eating junk food. We had all planned on going out to a house party together later, but we still had a couple of hours until then. Quinn convinced us to finally get out and celebrate the end of the semester.

  “Are you excited about spending the holidays with your mom and dad, Emerson?” Jaxon asked.

  Quinn’s head shot over to look straight at me. I knew she was shocked that I hadn’t told him yet. She tried to act casual, moving toward the kitchen as if to get something, but it was obvious something had bothered her. Cole stood up awkwardly to join her.

  “Uh… no, not really. I don’t really like holidays.” Actually, holidays were the absolute worst time of the year, aside from February 2, the day they were both killed. Coincidently, that was also my birthday as well. Yep, happy birthday to me. I NEVER celebrate it. It’s forbidden. Quinn doesn’t even mention my birthday anymore.

  Completely oblivious to our odd reactions, Jaxon laughed a little and said, “What? Who doesn’t like the holidays?” He was holding my hand and I had to release it.

  I looked over at our audience; Quinn, Cole, and Jace all knew. I looked to them for help, for someone to distract him from this topic. No one stepped up and I was all alone.

  I gripped my hands together tightly and murmured, “Umm… someone who… doesn’t have parents.” It was hard to get out of my mouth but I couldn’t lie to him.