Irresistible Refrain

by Michelle Mankin

  “You don’t know the half of it. You should come by. See for yourself,” Dizzy said with an exaggerated eyebrow wiggle. “I need to get to work, but why don’t you come by later, around nine? My uncle works the nightshift and a group of us usually hang out in the garage. I’ve got a used amp and a Fender I’d like to show you. It doesn’t sound too bad.”

  “No shit. You any good?”

  He shrugged. “I’m working on it.”

  “I sure as hell would like to try out your Fender.” I ran a hand through my hair. “I have a beat up Epiphone I could bring over.”

  “Sounds great. And if you need an amp, I could hook you up with one.”

  “Cool.” I adjusted the strap on my back pack. “You mind if I bring a friend? He actually sings pretty good.”

  “Sure, man. Whatever.” An Oldsmobile that was more bondo than metal pulled up alongside them. “That’s my ride.” Dizzy gave me a fist bump. “See ya then.”

  Around nine fifteen, War and I sauntered up the short driveway to the detached garage, loud music and a pack of teens greeted our arrival. Dizzy handed us a couple of red solo cups filled with beer as soon as we entered. We sat down to get acquainted, but before long I noticed that War had lost focus on the conversation. His gaze was riveted on something over my shoulder.

  “Dude.” War suddenly grabbed Dizzy’s arm and pointed. “Who’s that smoking babe?”

  Dizzy turned around. “My sister,” he groaned and rolled his eyes.

  Holy shit, I thought. Hair that used to lean more toward dark gold had lightened. It was long and straight now and the curled ends brushed across the top of a really nice looking pair of tits. She was practically falling out of the tight camisole and sweater set she wore. Her narrow hips and long slender legs were sexy as hell in a pair of tight jeans. No wonder War was distracted.

  Lace Lowell was a total knockout.

  The guy she was currently talking to touched her arm. A primal urge rose up inside of me. I wanted to push that guy the fuck away from her. Evidently feeling the weight of our stares, Lace pivoted in our direction. Those familiar whisky eyes met mine in a collision that left me reeling afterward. She blinked slowly before her lips curved up and she glided over, hips drawing my attention as they swayed.

  Before I had a chance to make my move, War intercepted her. Grabbing her by the arms, he pulled her into him, even rocking his hips suggestively near hers. “Hey, beautiful,” he began, using the same line I’d heard him use a hundred times before. “Names Warren. Friends call me War. You can call me whatever the fuck you want.” He eased back, looked her over, and shook his head in disbelief. “Damn, you’re hot, baby.”

  Her cheeks turned as pink as her sweater set.

  War intertwined his fingers with hers and led her over. I felt my stomach take a crashing nose dive into the pavement. She wasn’t even likely to notice me with War around. Women took to War even more readily now than they had when we’d been in middle school. To my dismay, it appeared that Lace was no exception.

  “We were just talking about our band. I’m the lead singer,” War told her.

  Seriously? We didn’t have a band. We’d only just discussed the idea a couple of minutes ago. But that was just like War. He’d shoot off his mouth and throw out a grandiose idea even if most of the time nothing ever came of it.

  “Lace,” I began, my tongue suddenly too thick for my mouth. “It’s good to see you.” I discovered she was even more gorgeous up close. The garage spotlights made her hair shine. Her amber eyes sparkled with laughter. Her smile was sexy as hell, and her lips practically begged to be kissed.

  “Bry,” she returned, her voice low and flirty as she checked me out from my button down to my boots. “You grew up nice.”

  “You, too, Lace.” I shoved my hands into the front pockets of my pants. Hoping she couldn’t tell that there was a lot more up at the moment than just my height. I’d never felt so tongue tied or so undone by a girl.

  “A band, huh?” Her smile widened, and she shifted her body toward War. “You’ve certainly got the arrogance to be a lead singer.” She reached over and touched his face, tilting his chin one way and then the other as she studied him. “You’re definitely handsome enough to pull it off.” Her voice had lowered to a sexy purr that sizzled like an electrical current beneath my skin.

  Then she turned to me. “So, if he’s the lead, you’d be…” She paused and I filled in.

  “The guitarist.”

  “Ah Slash, I should have guessed. Just like when we were kids.”

  I nodded, my heart thundering inside my chest. I wanted her to touch me like she’d touched War. She trailed her eyes over me instead, a half lidded lingering appraisal.

  “Yeah,” she said huskily. “You could totally rock the brooding guitarist role. I’d throw my panties at you.”

  “Would you now?” I leaned in, playing the game, cocking a brow.

  “Uh-huh” She leaned in too, her face tilted up. “If I was wearing any,” she whispered.

  Holy hell! I reached for her arm, but War pulled me away from her.

  “I need a beer,” War announced.

  “What?” My mind was still turning over the panties thing.

  “You thirsty, babe?” War asked Lace over my shoulder.

  “I could use a beer, Mr. McMoves.”

  “Alright.” War laughed. “We’ll be right back.”

  Reluctantly, I followed War. While he filled a cup from the keg, my mind remained preoccupied with thoughts of Lace.

  “Bryan.” War shook my arm.

  “Huh?”

  “I’ve gotta have her.”

  “Lace?” I laughed. “You only just met her.”

  “I’m fucking serious, man.” War ran a hand over his face while holding the beer steady in the other. “I mean it. I’ve never felt this way around a chick.”

  My eyes narrowed. War was never serious about any woman. “Come on, War. She’s just a freshman. You’ll be bored with her in no time.” I cast a quick glance around. “Let me ask Dizzy if he knows anyone.” I lowered my voice. “Someone older, more interesting and experienced, you know, like you usually go for.”

  War frowned, his head cocked to the side. “What’s your problem, Bryan?” Tension seemed to crackle in the air between us. He straightened. “You think Lace’s too good for me?”

  “No, War. Of course not. I’m not saying anything. I just don’t think she’s your type.”

  “You gotta be kidding. She sure the fuck is. Bold, sassy, sexy as hell.” He raised his brows, giving me a look like I’d lost my mind. “How’s that not my type?”

  “Ok.” I shrugged, trying to be casual about it. Maybe he’d let it go. I prayed he would.

  “Bryan.” He put his hand on my arm. “We’ve been through a lot of shit together, haven’t we?”

  I nodded.

  “And I’ve always had your back, haven’t I?”

  “Yeah, but I really don’t see what this has to do with…”

  “Took that stint in juvie when you wrecked my old man’s car,” he cut in. “Did all that AA counseling bullshit. Still doing the community service hours.” A shadow fell across War’s face giving it a sinister glow.

  Grimly, I nodded. He’d done all that for me and more. I owed him.

  “I saw how you looked at her, man. But I don’t want you coming between me and this chick, understand? This one’s mine.”

  I made a promise based on our friendship that night. I figured he would get tired of her in a week or so, like he always had with all the other girls before. Then I’d be free to make my move. Unfortunately, it didn’t work out that way. And that promise ended up costing me more over the years than I ever could have imagined.

  I exhaled the breath I’d been holding, my eyes following the attractive brunette Bryan had just dismissed. As she pulled herself unsteadily up on a bar stool, her shoulders sagged. The weight of Bryan’s rejection obviously hit her hard.

  I could relate.
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br />   I’d thought that I had managed to put my life back together pretty well after my mother left it in a pile of rubble. Unfortunately, the foundation had been faulty. Like a stack of Jenga blocks, Bryan’s love and approval had been the critical bottom layer. When he had yanked that away, the tower had begun to wobble. Then War and the group had shut me out, bringing it completely down. Martin was there waiting to set fire to what was left. I was worse off than before. Instead of rubble my life was scattered ashes.

  The brunette drew my attention again as she knocked back another shot, swiveled around on her chair, and scanned the room. Bryan hadn’t been the first one she had approached. She had made overtures to all the guys, except for my brother. She stood, swayed a bit, and crossed the room toward him. Dizzy already had two girls with him, one on his lap, another one beside him. She stood in front of him at least five minutes before he finally acknowledged her.

  “Whatcha staring at, babe?” War asked me.

  “Nothing,” I muttered distractedly. I wasn’t about to share. I didn’t know why I found myself so interested in the brunette, or why the way the guys were treating her disturbed me so much. Or maybe I just didn’t want to examine my reasons too closely.

  Dizzy waved her off too.

  I stiffened when she rushed past me with tears in her eyes.

  Shit.

  “I’ll be right back.” I slid War’s hand off my thigh and immediately went to look for her. I found her in the restroom, her hands braced on the edges of the porcelain sink. Telltale trails of black mascara ran down her cheeks. In the mirror, eyes flooded with pain met mine before darting away. I obviously wasn’t the one she was hoping to see.

  I moved beside her. “Listen,” I said softly. “They’re not all that.”

  “Who?” she asked, though I think we both knew who I was talking about.

  “Tempest.” I hooked a thumb over my shoulder. “Those jerks who just blew you off.”

  “Listen, I grew up with those guys. They’re no better than you are. They put their pants on one leg at time.” Watching the desperate way she had thrown herself at the guys made me sad for her. Third night on the tour and already I was sick of this groupie bullshit. It turned my stomach. I touched her arm. “I don’t know when they started being such asses, but I wanted to apologize, for my brother Dizzy in particular.”

  Her eyes widened in acknowledgement.

  “What’s your name?” I asked.

  “Lilly.”

  “Lilly, let me tell you a few eye opening things about Dizzy.” I pulled a towel out of the dispenser, wetted it, and then started to wipe the mascara from her cheeks. Without the makeup, I realized she was much younger than I’d assumed, probably not more than seventeen. A hard age, a vulnerable age, the age for me when I’d lost everything. “The guy’s personal hygiene sucks. He literally stinks. I’m sure you noticed. He’s been re-wearing the same clothes for the past two days. Then there’s his eating habits. He thinks just because milk duds have the word milk in them that they’re nutritious and therefore make an acceptable breakfast.”

  Her lip twitched.

  “Oh, yeah.” I nodded. “He’s a junk food junkie. Eats Cheese Whiz straight from the jar. And even though he’s twenty-one, he still acts like he’s twelve. He watches SpongeBob. All. The. Time. He’s got every single episode memorized. This from a guy who half the time can’t be bothered to remember the words to the songs from his own band.”

  Lilly smiled. “Why are you telling me all this,” she asked softly.

  “Because I want you to get that he and the rest of the Tempest guys are just like the guys you probably go to school with. I saw the way they treated you out there and I didn’t like it. So they’re in a band and they look really sexy when they’re up on stage under the lights.” Her face was clean now, so I threw away the towel. “Don’t idolize them. Don’t let them get to you.” I took her hand and led her out of the restroom. “You deserve better than the disrespect that’s being dished out there.”

  Back in the main party room, I stopped to study her again. Her eyes glittered way too brightly to have just been the result of my pep talk. I wondered what she was doing besides those shots. I scrambled for something to say that might help keep her from making all the same mistakes I had.

  Just as I was getting ready to speak, another girl walked up and joined us. She was blonde and her four inch heels made her taller than me. She gave me a hard look before turning to Lilly. “This chick bothering you?” They were obviously good friends, the blonde’s expression sympathetic as she glanced at Lilly and squeezed her shoulder.

  “No.” Lilly shook her head. “She’s cool. She’s Dizzy’s sister.”

  “You’re really lucky to have someone looking out for you,” I told Lilly while my eyes searched for the one who I used to rely on in that way. Bryan had been hard to miss in a dark charcoal button down that did amazing things for his eyes, but I couldn’t find him now. He had been standing over by the window before I’d followed Lilly into the bathroom. I wondered where he had gone.

  Eyes back on the pair of girls, I finished my thought. “Hold on tight to that. Having just one person who believes in you can make all the difference in the world.” I pulled in a deep breath through my nose. I suddenly felt really fucking old and worn out. “You two should get out of here. I love these guys, but you know as well as I do, they’re not looking for a relationship. They’re just looking to get laid.”

  “She’s right.” Lilly’s friend tugged on her hand and pulled her toward the door. “See that’s what I told you.”

  “What about you?” Lilly looked concerned as she turned back toward me.

  “I’m good,” I lied. But I wasn’t. I realized that I wasn’t really much more than a groupie myself. I was a lost cause. No further down to go. I’d blown my chance for better.

  After they left, I went back to War. He talked me into doing another line in the coat closet. He got really amorous after that, his tongue trailing up my neck and his lips stopping below my ear. “Lacey,” he groaned, his hands framing my face. “Let’s go back to the bus. I want you now.”

  “Alright.” He took my hand and guided me through the crowded room. I put on a pair of sunglasses as we entered the lobby, the lights too bright for my dilated eyes. The bus was deserted when we boarded. War’s mouth immediately descended, his tongue delving deep into mine while his hands groped my ass in a way that was just short of being painful. War was an aggressive lover, a trait I knew from experience was magnified whenever he was high.

  He tossed his sunglasses aside, and walked me backward without breaking the kiss. My own shades slid through my fingers as he pushed the button to open the door to the sleeping section.

  He hefted me up. “Wrap those beautiful legs around me, babe.”

  I did as he asked, folding my legs around him as he stalked us to the back bedroom. He set me down on the window ledge and leaned back to look at me. My pink dress was hiked up around my hips, giving him an eyeful.

  “Damn,” he whispered voice thick, eyes dark. “I need more of that mouth of yours.” He plunged his hands into my hair. My head banged against the cold glass as his warm lips covered my own.

  My heart hammered against my ribs. I took in short shallow breaths through my nose as his tongue speared repeatedly, possessively into my mouth. Threading my fingers into his silky caramel locks, I scraped my nails against his scalp the way I remembered he’d always liked.

  He groaned into my mouth breaking the embrace just long enough to reach back between his shoulder blades to tug off his shirt.

  My eyes trailed over his lean smooth torso. He was just as sexy as he’d ever been, the irreverent black heart inked over the spot where his real heart lay. But my mind conjured up a vision of another.

  “Gotta see you,” War growled as he pulled my head forward yanking down the zipper of the dress and unclasping my bra. Cold air hit my skin as both parted open. War peeled the dress down my shoulders and off my arms.
As he stared at my bared breasts, my nipples tightened. “Feed me, baby.” His voice was low and demanding.

  I cupped my breasts in my hands while he spread my legs wide enough to step between them. His fingers dug deep into my upper thighs. He rocked his arousal against me before lowering his head to trace my breasts with his tongue, in and around my splayed fingers.

  I moaned and my head started to loll back when I heard a sound. I turned. Bryan was standing beside his bunk, his eyes dark and hooded as he returned my gaze. At first, my cheeks flushed with embarrassment. But then my eyes narrowed at him in defiance.

  Go ahead and look. You might not have wanted me but War sure as hell does.

  Bryan’s gaze slid to the side. “Shut the door next time, asshole,” he growled before leaning forward to slap his hand against the door switch.

  “Sorry babe,” War’s lust glazed eyes went from the closed door and then back to me.

  I dipped my head in acknowledgement but wasn’t interested at all after that. War didn’t seem to notice. When he was finished, he moved away and I was left feeling used and shaky inside. I climbed down from the window ledge and readjusted my dress.

  They’re just looking to get laid.

  “I’m going to get cleaned up,” I said softly, tiny tremors shaking my hands as I grabbed my toiletry bag from the tiny closet.

  Oblivious to my distress, War grunted a response and flopped back on the bed with a magazine.

  I padded out the door on tiptoes. King and Sager were laughing at something in the front lounge. I saw their faces glowing from the reflection of the television. Hopefully Bryan had already closed his curtain and gone to bed. I risked a peek at his bunk.

  He was awake. His hands were clasped behind his head, his earbuds were in, and his piercing grey green eyes captured me in their glittering gaze.

  I’d only thought he looked dangerous up on stage the other night. That was just an act. This was real. I could feel the dark energy radiating off him in waves. Anger, disappointment, and something else I couldn’t pinpoint flickered across his face, before his lids lowered and he shut me out.