by Rina Kent
But when we were growing up, he didn’t allow us to be spoiled by that money, never let us use it as a blanket excuse for our actions or a crutch we could fall back on when things didn’t work out.
We have one motto in our family—everyone is responsible for their own actions.
Even Dad himself.
Sometimes, it feels as if he brought together people who could never fit in the same puzzle, and yet, we somehow do.
We’re somehow the most cohesive family I know.
Despite our dark and bloody past.
“Since you’ve brought the whole of London, why didn’t you finish the job and invite Agnus so he could cook?”
“He came with us, but he chose to finish some pending work at the hotel.” He smiles at the mention of his childhood friend/right-hand man-turned-husband. “And he’s Dad to you.”
“No way in fuck will I call him Dad after I’ve known him as Agnus all my life.”
“Teal does that just fine. Or you could call him Papa, like Elsa does.”
“Eww, no way in fuck. And Elsa does that just to egg him on. She still doesn’t like him, in case you didn’t notice.”
“She’ll get there.”
“Those are empty dreams and you know it, Dad.”
A dark look covers his features and I realize I fucked up by reminding him of facts he doesn’t like to think about. My father’s personal life has always been a mess of epic proportions. His first wife, Elsa’s mother, was a psycho who captured me and Teal after we ran away from our mother, because she wanted us to look like her lost son.
As if that wasn’t enough, he was shot by her and spent nine years in a coma, during which time, Agnus took care of us. And when he woke up, it was like he’d become a different person. When we were young, he used to be more outgoing, but after sleeping for almost a decade, he changed.
The only person who stood with him through it all was Agnus. That man can be mistaken for a mute and Elsa calls him a psycho to his face, and honestly, he does have antisocial tendencies, but I knew early on how much he cared for Dad.
In fact, he only took care of us in his absence for Dad’s sake.
What surprised me, however, was when Dad invited the three of us to a family dinner and announced that he and Agnus were in a relationship.
While I always assumed Agnus was fluid orientation-wise, Dad is the straightest person I know. And he still is, I guess.
He once told me that Agnus is the only man he’s attracted to. It’s not about his gender, it’s about him.
So for the first time in his life, he has stability with the one person who understands him the most. The fact that there’s bad blood between his only biological daughter and his husband has always sat wrong with him.
And in hindsight, I shouldn’t have brought their animosity up, so I redirect the convo to a topic Dad likes—praising his husband.
“By the way, I got the annual report of the portfolio Agnus handled for me, and the profit tripled.”
A rare smirk tugs his lips. “He knows what he’s doing.”
“Obviously. I have more money than I can ever spend.”
“You could start your own firm.”
“Not yet. I need to get a few more years of experience first.”
He fixes me with a glare.
I search my surroundings, then focus back on him. “What?”
“Did you send Agnus a thank-you gift for tripling your profit?”
“He doesn’t like those.” I resist the urge to mention that Agnus is a bit antisocial.
Okay, a lot. I’m a million percent sure that he would’ve become a serial killer if he hadn’t met Dad early on in their childhood.
“Send it.”
“Fine. Is he coming over here later?”
“No, he’ll spend the night at the hotel.”
“Why?”
“I told you, for work.”
I squint. “Since when does Agnus choose work over being your shadow?”
“It’s a special type of work. Drop it.”
“Hmm.”
Dad pauses mixing the soup and stares at me. “What?”
“I’m curious, is all.”
“And I’m curious about your girl and the reasons why you didn’t introduce her to us. Is it not serious with her?”
My spine snaps in a line at his swift way of changing the subject and putting me in the limelight. I take a moment to think, then say in a low tone, “It’s not that. It’s…different.”
“Different as in, you don’t wrap it when you’re with her?” A smile tilts his lips, amusement shining in his eyes.
“How did you…? I’m going to fucking kill Daniel.”
“It was Ronan, actually. He animatedly told the story to approximately thirty people at a party. It was entertaining.”
I close my eyes and take a deep breath. “Please tell me Teal and Elsa weren’t there.”
“They were the first in line.”
“Fuck.”
“It’s due to that piece of information they decided to tag along.” He continues mixing the ingredients slowly, taking his time with the task.
Dad has always been the type of person who doesn’t rush into anything. Whether it’s business or his personal life. He’s steady, almost never provoked, to the point that it’s creepy sometimes.
“Are you going to define “different,” Knox?”
“I don’t know how to explain it. I guess I feel more at peace when I’m with her, a little less perturbed, maybe. Just…not stuck in my head or with my shadows or in the past.”
“Interesting.”
“Do you think that’s normal?”
“Depends on your reasons for feeling that way.”
“What if I don’t know those reasons?”
“You do. You just don’t recognize them yet, which is to be expected considering you closed yourself off for decades.”
“I…didn’t close myself off.”
“Yes, you did.” His voice takes on a more soothing tone. “The first day I met you, you were this scrawny kid with protruding bones and marks all over your body. You were obviously hurt, hungry, thirsty, and scared. You were so scared, you shook with it, but even then, at eight years old, you pushed Teal behind you and came out first. Even though it seemed like your brain told you to run, you didn’t. You stood there, head held high and eyes never looking sideways. It was as if you were giving the world the middle finger and telling it that you wouldn’t run anymore, you wouldn’t hide. You wouldn’t be told what to do. From that point on, you’d fight. For yourself and your sister. You had a fire in your eyes, one that rose from the ashes of sealing your past. That fire is the reason I decided to raise you, Knox, but I always knew it hid a deeper layer, a layer you refuse to face, even as an adult.”
My grip tightens on the knife and I take a deep breath to slow down the fucking pounding in my chest. “What do you want me to face, Dad? My whore mother who sold us out for some drugs or the father whose identity she didn’t even know? They’re both gone, and it’s pointless to think about them.”
He faces me, a dip appearing between his brows. “That’s where you’re wrong. They’re may be gone, but the damage they left behind isn’t.”
“I’m fine, Dad. I’m a lawyer, the youngest partner in the firm, in fact, and bloody brilliant at what I do. I’m not a criminal or a lowlife or a manipulator. I. Am. Fine.”
“That’s what Teal said before she broke down.”
I pause, letting the knife fall to the chopping board because I’m tempted to jam it against my own veins just to see blood.
That was one of the reoccurring thoughts I had as a teen, but I resisted, knowing it would make Dad and T sad. There was no way in fuck I would be the cause of misery for the people I cared about the most.
He meets my gaze, his voice lowering even further, as if he doesn’t want to disturb my shadows. “Teal only got better when she faced it, Knox.”
“I’m not her.”
&n
bsp; “No, you’re not. You’re worse. At least she recognizes something is wrong and doesn’t go pretending everything is perfect. You need to start doing the same if you wish to keep that girl. No woman likes a man trapped with demons from his childhood.”
Before I can say anything, the door to my bedroom opens and my focus immediately shifts in that direction. Teal comes out first, alone, wearing her poker face, which is a typical expression of hers.
She really only laughs and smiles easily around her husband and son. Gone are the days when I was the only one she smiled at.
I might have hated Ronan a bit at first for taking her away, but I couldn’t hold a grudge for long, considering how much he means to her.
How alive she is when he’s around.
Elsa is arm in arm with Anastasia, who’s now wearing a pair of my sweatpants, and although she’s rolled them up her stomach, they’re still skimming the ground.
Fuck. Seeing her in my clothes is a fucking turn-on.
Would I be yelled at and blacklisted from the next Christmas family gathering if I kicked everyone out so I could fuck her against the door?
I’d probably take that risk.
However, my master plan is put to a halt when I realize Anastasia’s attention isn’t on me.
She’s focused on something Elsa is showing her on her phone and smiling. It’s soft, demure, and appears genuinely happy.
“So that’s your son?” she asks in that delicate voice of hers.
“Yeah, his name is Eli.”
“He…doesn’t look anything like you.”
“I know.” Elsa furrows her brow, appearing dejected. “He’s taking after his father and grandfather, but I’m holding on to a slight bit of hope that his personality will at least resemble mine.”
“Don’t hold out too much hope, princess.” Dad interferes with his usual warmth, as if we weren’t having a heavy as fuck conversation just now. “He’s becoming a King more and more.”
“Dad! You’re supposed to be on my side. Don’t you want your grandkid to take after you?”
“Well, I still have Remi and the dozen children Knox said he’s planning to have.”
Anastasia’s eyes widen and her cheeks flush a deep shade of red while Elsa grins.
“I never said that.” I try to be calm but fail.
“Really, now? I’m pretty sure I heard you say before how comfortable you feel around—” I place a hand to his mouth, cutting him off mid-sentence, and shake my head.
His eyes shine and Teal steps between us, staring us down, which is comical at best because we’re tall and she’s so small that it takes effort on her part. “What are you two hiding? Let me in.”
“Nothing you need to worry about, T. And you might need to stop craning your neck before you sprain it. I don’t want Ron on my case.”
“Screw you.” She elbows my side.
“Oh, you’re fucked, T.” I release Dad to grab her ticklish spot. She starts snorting and begging me to stop, but I don’t.
It’s how I used to cheer her up when she was down, which was most of the time, before she met her husband.
I catch Elsa telling Anastasia, “I’m the grown-up in all of this. Excuse the children’s behavior.”
“You’re on, Ellie,” I say, then Teal and I bring her into the midst of us. Even though she tries to fight it, she’s helpless when we both attack her ticklish side.
“I’m sorry, Jane,” Dad tells her with a smile. “My children aren’t usually this immature.”
She shakes her head, grinning, though her mannerisms are still reserved. “You have a beautiful family, Mr. Steel.”
“Ethan is fine. After all, you’re part of us now.”
I expect Anastasia to be shy, maybe shocked, but her smile drops and she looks absolutely horrified.
As if a ghost from her past has appeared in front of her.
30
ANASTASIA
When Kirill said Aleksander would keep an eye on me, I didn’t think it would be close.
As in, across from the firm close. As in, he’s in his car, watching me like a hawk while I walk through the front entrance with coffee.
Usually, Gwen gets the coffee, or Chris. Anyone but me basically, since I try to keep human contact as minimum as possible.
But today, both of them were busy and I had to go. I had to cross the distance to the coffee shop and pretend that I wasn’t being shadowed by a scary man in a black suit.
It’s been like this for a week. Ever since I was ambushed in my apartment by Kirill and Adrian and told that I had a role to play.
That no matter what I do, I’ll never stop being the Bratva’s princess.
As promised, Adrian must’ve not told my father, or he would’ve sent his guards to fetch me.
Kirill kept his word about not leaving me unsupervised, which is why his right-hand man, Aleksander, has been following me around discretely. To people on the outside, it wouldn’t be noticeable since he changes car models, plates, and even the color of his clothes.
He’s a professional, after all.
Though this is a rare occasion where he’s not acting like Kirill’s shadow.
And because I’m attuned to him and to the danger he represents, I spotted him the first time Knox and I left his penthouse together.
I had to distract him from looking at the rearview mirror so he wouldn’t realize we were being followed. The last thing I want is for him to clash with the other men from my life.
Especially after I met his family, a welcoming one with their distinctive sense of humor and mannerisms.
That night, they stayed over. We had dinner together and played board games. Ethan and Elsa told me all sorts of stories about Knox’s teenage years and how competitive he was—still is. I listened with keen interest to every detail, every piece of information about a version of Knox I’ve never met.
No clue why I held on to every word, but it felt vital in a way. Like a memento I needed to keep close.
Or maybe I just care about Knox more than I want to admit.
Teal wasn’t much of a willing participant in telling stories, but I loved the seamless relationship she has with her brother.
The way they understand each other without having to say a word.
Before they left the following morning, she stood there with her hands crossed over her chest and told me point-blank, “You better not hurt my brother.”
That sentence stayed with me the most after their visit.
It’s as if she knew that’s exactly what would happen.
I don’t blame her for disliking me. I actually respect her for looking out for her brother. That’s what family does.
Unlike mine.
My gaze flits to Aleksander’s car. Even though it has tinted windows, I can almost picture him staring back with that cold gaze of his that only ever softens around Kirill.
He must’ve figured out my relationship with Knox, and if Adrian’s threat is any indication, they wouldn’t hesitate to use him against me.
To hurt him because of me.
Because that’s what they do in the brotherhood. They use people, break hearts, and crunch bones.
And I’m no exception.
If anything, I’m placed on a high pedestal for being the Pakhan’s daughter. It’s a cruel twist of fate that my mom got pregnant after a short fling with my father—the number one man in the Bratva.
She married my stepfather afterward and I should’ve been a normal citizen. But that jerk was abusing her, both physically and emotionally, and although she tried to protect me, she knew she couldn’t.
That’s why she took me to the park that day. I won’t forget it, ever. Not only because Mom was shaking, but also because she seemed relieved when a tall man with harsh features came.
And I remember how his shadow blocked the sun as he stood there, watching us. Or more like, watching me.
She told me he was my father and I grabbed onto her, thinking she’d leave me with him, but she
didn’t.
They just talked while I played hide-and-seek with one of the other tall men who came with him.
Before Mom and I left, Papa patted my hair. I remember having eyes so big, they nearly reached my hairline. My stepfather never did that, never treated me like more than a pest in his path.
One he kicked around whenever he saw fit.
Papa also gave me a piece of paper with his number on it and told me to call him if I needed anything.
In hindsight, I should never have done that.
It’s why I got trapped in his world in the first place.
But it’s not like I had any other option that night.
Now that I think about it, the moment I called him, crying on the phone, was when I sealed my fate.
That was when I became part of the Bratva.
My phone vibrates in my pocket, bringing me out of my reverie.
It’s a text from an unknown number.
I don’t see the lawyer losing any cases. On the contrary, he’s coming on even stronger. Here’s a little incentive for you.
My thumb shakes as I click on the attached video. It’s taken from a parking garage’s surveillance camera. The building in which Knox’s apartment is. I recognize it from the yellow lines on the ground and the strong light.
It’s dimmer in the video, though, as if someone cut off the power on purpose.
My heart hammers in my throat when Knox steps out of his car, carrying his briefcase and talking on the phone. He’s wearing the black suit that I helped him put on yesterday. I clearly remember it because he decided to fuck me at the last second before we went to work and ordered me not to mess up our clothes.
This footage was taken when he got home last night, later than usual, since he had a long meeting with Lauren about Sandra’s case.
At exactly that moment when he was getting home, I was trying to fix something for dinner. Elsa called me and I burned the pasta anyway, so I kept talking to her and ordered something.
It all seems normal until the angle shifts to following Knox from behind as he walks to the elevator.