Forgotten

by Jessica Carbine

  “But he hasn’t kissed me! It could be.”

  “Don’t freak out! Just talk to him. I mean, he’s here, in Pennsylvania of all places! Don’t you think he’d be with his family if it was that serious?” Jenna said.

  Cassie nodded. Surely if he was actually in danger of dying, he wouldn’t be so far away from his only family. “I should call him and let him know about tonight. And you have a date in an hour!”

  “Ah! You’re right! I need to go shower!” She jumped up from her desk, spun Cassie around and pushed her toward the door. “Out, out! But no freaking out!”

  “Alright, alright! Good luck. I’ll see you at seven.”

  Cassie went to her room to call Kyler. The phone rang several times before the answering machine picked up. She was used to his message recording, a strange, unemotional voice confirmed the numbers she’d dialed and asked for her name and telephone number.

  She hesitatingly told the machine it was Cassie and asked it to call her. She paused and said, “I’m really looking forward to seeing you tonight, Kyler. We’re going to be at Zach’s. He lives in Stouffer, too. Building 7B. If I don’t hear from you by 7, meet me there.”

  She tried to study. But waiting for Kyler to call proved to be too much of a distraction from organic chemistry. She paced nervously in her room a few minutes, wondering what could be wrong with him. Surely, whatever it is, he’ll get better? But, what if it’s permanent? And what if that month really is his last—

  “No. Of course not. He said he’d be home in six weeks.” She wondered what he was doing in the two weeks between when he left and when he arrived. Maybe traveling slowly due to his health? He seemed so healthy; she couldn’t understand. Maybe he had to stop off on the way for a treatment?

  Abruptly, she threw open the door to her room and walked out. She moved quickly, trying to escape the thoughts in her head. She went for the stairs, but in the lobby on her floor she saw Kyler coming out of the stairwell.

  Grinning at the sight of her, he said, “Hey you! I was just coming to find you. I lost my cell phone, and wondered if you were trying to get a hold of me.” He showed no signs of stress from his earlier conversation.

  “Hi. I did try to call.” She tried to clear her face from her internal debate.

  “Where are you going?” He took her hand.

  Curiosity momentarily won out over fear. “Looking for you, actually. Will you come with me to my room? I want to talk.”

  Walking down the hall, he grimaced. “Uh-oh. That’s never good.”

  Cassie jumped up on her bed and sat cross-legged, fidgeting nervously. She wasn’t sure she wanted to know the answers to her questions.

  Kyler leaned against her raised bed. “So what’s up?”

  Cassie chickened out. “I want you to meet my friends tonight.” And I want to just pretend everything is as great as I thought it was this morning, she added silently. “Well, more accurately, I want you to get to know them. You’ve already met them, but they’ll be better behaved tonight. They didn’t think you were a keeper.”

  “Alright. But why do I feel you’re bequeathing a great honor? And that you’re incredibly nervous about it?” He jumped to sit next to her, and took her hand again, this time with both of his, thereby preventing it from fidgeting against the other.

  When she answered, it was only to the first half of the question, and tried to just shake the nervousness out of her voice. “Well, I’m normally not with anyone long enough to introduce them. And I’ve never been with anyone so constantly.”

  He smiled faintly, moving his top hand across hers. “And why is that, do you suppose?”

  “That’s hard to explain.”

  “Try. Please?”

  She sighed, wishing she had something to play with, like her other hand. Fidgeting was relaxing. Then again, its current position wasn’t terrible….

  “With most boys,” she finally began. “I lose interest quickly. Or there isn’t any interest to begin with.”

  “And the others?” he prompted.

  “The others. Well there were only two others. One became my best friend, whom you probably remember,” She said it with finality, as though that was all she meant to say. But Kyler wasn’t satisfied. He pressed for more.

  “And the other?” He squeezed her hand encouragingly.

  “And the other didn’t last long, either.” She went on, knowing he would ask, “And the reason why is hard to explain. I liked him. I liked him a lot. We always had fun. He was smart, creative, funny. But something was wrong. And I still can’t really describe what it was.

  “Every time I was with him, every time we kissed, I felt... wrong. The closest thing I can think of to describe it is guilt.” Cassie laughed ruefully. “I felt guilty when I kissed my boyfriend. So I broke up with him.”

  Cassie winced, hoping he wouldn’t ask any more questions.

  “But with me... it’s different?” He asked uncertainly.

  “Oh of course it is!” She replied easily, relieved. “With you it’s just easy. Relaxed. Fun.” She shrugged on the last word.

  Kyler nodded with understanding. “It feels very natural. So what are we doing tonight?” She saw her own relief echoed in his face as he changed the subject.

  Cassie checked the clock. “We’re meeting them in an hour to make ice cream.”

  “Okay. One hour. You hungry?”

  “Yeah, a little,” Cassie said, frustrated. She had brought him here to ask about him, but she ended up confessing her failed love life. She sighed. “Do you mind if we just eat at the cafeteria? We’re supposed to meet at Zach’s building.”

  “I’m game.” He hopped down and offered her his hand.

  She smiled as she took it. She could worry about the rest later.

  Chapter 7: A Solution & More Problems

  A little over an hour later, Cassie and Kyler stood on Zach’s doorstep, hand-in-hand. Cassie swung her other hand nervously at her side while Kyler knocked. She was surprised at herself, she was normally much more confident. Kyler made everything different. But Cassie was determined to completely put aside her worries about him, and just enjoy this evening. It wasn’t hard to do, Kyler kept her cheerful.

  “No one’s coming,” Kyler said after a few minutes of silence.

  Cassie tried the door. “It’s open.”

  They walked in slowly. “Hello, Zach?”

  Hearing laughter further in the apartment, they followed the sound. Cassie knew the apartment well, and led Kyler out to a small deck connected to the kitchen. Cassie stopped at the entrance to the deck in astonishment. Zach and Jenna sat across from each other, leaning in. They were both laughing, and they looked incredibly happy. But what surprised Cassie most were their hands, joined together on the table top.

  “Oh!” Jenna, seeing the intruders, jumped up, pulling her hand free.

  “Oh, hi Cassie!” Zach got up, too.

  “Hi you guys.” Cassie tactfully ignored their display of affection. “Good dinner?”

  “Uh, yeah.” Jenna was still flustered.

  “Nice to see you again, Kyler.” Zach offered a friendly hand.

  As Kyler shook it, Cassie apologized, “No one answered, and the door was open. Sorry!”

  “That’s fine. Sorry we didn’t answer, we lost track of time.” Zach gathered up the dishes from the table. “Let me just clear these and I’ll get the ice cream stuff.”

  “Hey, Kyler can you help him?” Cassie asked, and then winked at him.

  He grinned. “Sure.”

  When he left, Cassie nudged Jenna playfully in the side.

  “Maybe I should help,” Jenna tried to escape.

  “No way! They’ve already got everything.” Cassie sat down on a bench next to the railing, and pulled Jenna with her. She linked her arm through Jenna’s. “So, things appear to be going rather well!”

  Jenna tilted her head with half a smile and looked at Cassie. “Do they?”

  “Yes. What happened?”

&nb
sp; “Nothing, really. I think he likes me,” She said with an impish grin.

  “What was your first clue?” Cassie asked, grinning back.

  “He gave it away when he kissed me.” She went bright red.

  “Already?” Cassie asked, impressed. For someone who hadn’t mentioned he liked Cassie for years, Zach didn’t waste any time with Jenna. Cassie’s laugh soured as she wondered what Kyler was waiting for.

  “Yeah. We talked for a while afterward.” Jenna stopped, noticing Cassie’s pained expression. “What’s wrong? You don’t think he should have?”

  Cassie's expression cleared and she chuckled. “No, I’m just jealous.” She laughed even louder at Jenna’s expression. “No, not for Zach. Kyler still hasn’t kissed me.”

  “Oh yeah. I’m sorry,” Jenna said, relaxing.

  “I wonder what they’re talking about,” Cassie said, deliberately changing the subject. She wanted to be far away from the topic of kissing, or the lack thereof, when Kyler returned.

  “You, I imagine.” Jenna grinned.

  “You’re right Jenna.” Kyler suddenly appeared holding an old fashioned ice cream maker with ingredients spilling out the top. “We were.”

  “But only good things, Cass. Don’t worry,” Zach added behind him.

  Cassie tried to laugh, but it sounded a little off. She really hoped he hadn’t heard her previous sentence.

  “Did we come back too soon?” Kyler asked with a mischievous smile.

  Cassie smiled and shook her head at him. Oh well, she thought, if we’ve only got one month left, then…. She consciously redirected her thoughts. “That depends,” she said aloud, “did you bring Oreos?

  “I’ve got them.” Zach brandished the bag. They set to work adding ingredients to the pot, and then they sat back in the deck chairs to talk while the men took turns cranking the ice cream handle. They grilled Kyler about his home and family circumstances, and he was even more cryptic with them than he’d been with Cassie. Eventually they gave up, and the conversation became more equally divided.

  “Oh, Cassie!” Zach said suddenly as he turned the ice cream around in the ice, “I only just remembered, last week I saw Craig.”

  “Craig?” Cassie asked with a wary glance at Kyler that he did not miss. She’d rather not go into that story just now.

  “Yeah, remember, you wondered why he’d disappeared from your class? Apparently he dropped out.”

  “He dropped out? Of school entirely! Why?” Cassie couldn’t be more astonished. He definitely wasn’t the type to drop out.

  “He’s joined the army.”

  “What!? No way.” The military? “That doesn’t make any sense! Why?”

  “I have no idea. And apparently neither does he,” Zach said mysteriously, getting out of his chair to allow Kyler to take a turn at the crank.

  “Who is Craig?” Kyler asked.

  “What do you mean Zach?” Cassie asked, pretending not to notice Kyler’s question.

  “He was complaining loudly at the admin building to one of the secretaries. He claims he didn’t mean to drop out. He says that he just woke up one morning, dropped out and signed up for boot camp. He claims that, while he remembers doing it, he doesn’t remember why. And now, because his grades were so low, they won’t let him back in, even for ROTC. So he’s being shipped out.”

  “You’re kidding me!” Cassie asked, even more shocked. She wasn’t surprised that his grades were bad, she had suspected he’d been exaggerating. However, his story was too outrageous, even for him. If he had been forced to drop out, he was devious enough to create a good story, and this one was not. He’d come up with a believable, complimentary lie for why he’d decided to join the army. The contradiction between his story and his character convinced her he was telling the truth.

  “Nope. Crazy, huh? Course, he could just be lying. Covering up for being tossed out.” Zach echoed her thoughts.

  “No, I don’t think so. He’s clever enough to be believable. I wonder if he was using drugs.”

  “Okay, now you really have to tell me who this guy is,” Kyler said exasperated.

  “Just a guy I went on a date with,” Cassie said vaguely, waving a hand. It was all very nonchalant, but Kyler wasn’t fooled.

  “Yeah, right! You’ve been on dates with hundreds of guys; I doubt that your best friends remember all of their names.”

  “He definitely has a point,” Jenna said with a grin. Cassie glared at her.

  “Cass?” Kyler asked when she didn’t respond.

  “I’ll tell you later, alright?”

  “Tonight?”

  “Sure,” She said, lying.

  “Alright then. I think the ice cream’s done.”

  “Good, I think I’ve got the Oreos crushed well enough.” Jenna brandished a bag of blackish-brown powder.

  “Oh, Jenna! What is that?” Cassie protested.

  “Crushed chocolate and cream cookie sandwiches,” Jenna said, rolling her eyes.

  “It doesn’t look like it! It looks like some sort of chocolate crack. But not in a good way. There are no chunks! Here, I’ll add a few more.” They both dumped Oreo into the ice cream, Jenna’s powder and Cassie’s quartered cookies.

  They played games as they ate their ice cream. Cassie was pleased. It was a pleasant evening, with everyone acting friendly. Even Zach seemed to like Kyler, which was surprising. Zach didn’t normally like any of the guys she dated. Though, that made more sense now, in light of his confession. She was also delighted by Zach and Jenna’s interactions. Within a half hour, Zach gave up all pretenses and grasped her hand, causing Jenna to gasp, and then redden. Every time Cassie looked at their hands, Jenna’s blush darkened.

  The sun had long since sunk down behind the horizon when Kyler stood up. “Well, perhaps we should leave. We have a conversation to have tonight!”

  “Yes, we do.” Cassie knew he wanted to discuss who Craig was, but she intended to use the opportunity to find out about his plans… and health. She stood up next to him. “You two have a good night. I’ll talk to you later.”

  “Did you have a nice time?” Cassie asked as they pulled onto the main road in Kyler’s car.

  “Yeah, you’re right, they were friendlier.” He grinned at her, “You didn’t mention they were dating.”

  “That’s because they weren’t.” Cassie smiled.

  Looking at her, Kyler smiled in response. “You look happy.”

  “I am. For them.” She qualified. Kyler took a right onto a busy street.

  “Are we going somewhere in particular?” Cassie asked curiously.

  “Yeah... you’ll see.”

  Cassie recognized Manor Park as they pulled in to the parking lot. “Back here?” It was where they’d first officially met.

  “You haven’t been swinging since we met, have you?” He asked happily as they headed toward the playground.

  “Nope. And I hadn’t been before, either.”

  “Really?”

  “Maybe I have. I don’t remember.”

  “Oh. Of course. I’m so sorry.” He looked it.

  “Don’t be. It’s not your fault.” He went red, as though it was his fault, and she laughed. “Besides, it makes me more mysterious. I bet that’s how I’ve gotten half the boys I’ve dated.”

  “Now I’m even sorrier,” He said it with a grin, but he still looked sincere. He pushed her for a few minutes, talking about trivial things, then he sat on the swing next to her and they just moved back and forth gently.

  “You know I want to know about Craig,” He began.

  “Yes, I know. But I have a few questions to ask you first. And if you answer me then I’ll tell you all about him,” She offered.

  “Hmm. And if I don’t answer, I don’t get to hear the story, right?” He teased.

  “Right.”

  “So what do you want to know?” He asked, more serious now.

  Cassie, nervous, just kept swinging.

  “Cass? I’m ready to tell you anythi
ng you want to know.” He amended that, “Any questions you would think of, I would willingly answer.”

  “I wonder if you would mean that if you knew... ”

  “Knew what? I know a lot about you, Cass.”

  “You don’t know that I was in the administration building this afternoon,” She said, gaining courage to look at his face. Then she dropped her face quickly. He looked horrified. “See?”

  “No, you don’t understand,” his voice was hoarse. “I would have told you anything, but that’s not how I would have wanted you to find out. I can’t remember everything I said. What did you hear?”

  “Halle wants you to come home,” She said quietly.

  “Yes.” It sounded more than just an agreement to her words, but an agreement with Halle.

  “She wants you to leave me!” She was almost crying now.

  “No,” He said, positively. Cassie looked up. “She wants you to come with me.”

  “Why would she—” She stopped, pressing the more important matter she asked, “Why are you leaving?”

  “I didn’t say? It seemed like I did.” He stopped, struggling for words.

  “You said that you didn’t have a lot of time... I think I understand. That’s why I have to talk to you. When you said you have a month, did you mean... a month before you leave or a month before….” Her voice broke.

  “Before what?” He seemed honestly confused.

  “Before your time is up.”

  “I don’t understand. My time is up when I have to leave.” He tried to look into her eyes, but she had stopped swinging and was looking at the ground. She didn’t want him to see her cry.

  “So what’s wrong with you, exactly? Is it... permanent?”

  His face hardened. He wished he had a different answer. “Yes, it is.”

  “So what is it? Are you going to be very sick soon?” The tears were flowing freely now.

  “What?” His voice was so surprised, she looked up at him. He was staring at her in complete confusion. “Sick? You think I’m sick?”

  “Well... you talked about time, and injections, and medicine….” Cassie’s heart leapt, maybe she was wrong.

  He sat stumped for a solid minute before responding, “Whatever you think you heard, you must have misunderstood. I’m not sick.”