Uncrushable (Forehead Kisses #3)

by Abby Reynolds

  “Me too.”

  I held her close to me, calming me down.

  “I’ll try to talk to her tomorrow.”

  “You will?” I knew she hated Adrianna.

  “My ill feelings toward her are irrelevant in this matter. I want to help.”

  That made me love her even more. We could both put aside our differences and do the right thing. I knew most people wouldn’t care. But she and I were different. And that was why we were a set.

  Chapter Eight

  Keira

  Adrianna wasn’t exactly my favorite person in the world. Actually, I loathed her. But if she needed help, I’d be there. No girl should suffer what I went through. And no one deserved to die the way Eva did. It was wrong. Plain and simple.

  I searched for her on campus the next few days but I never saw her. If she was as banged up as Liam claimed, she probably wouldn’t show her face until the bruises were healed.

  Finally, I spotted her at the end of the week. She was in the café on campus, reading her history book while making notes with a highlighter. The bruises on her face faded, but I could see the faint outline of purple around her eyes. She wore heavy eye shadow to cover it up, but being a victim myself, I could see the trail she left behind.

  After taking a deep breath, I approached her table.

  Adrianna flinched when she spotted me. “Um, hi.” She placed her book on the table then capped the highlighter. She quickly averted her gaze then waited for me to speak.

  “Hi…”

  She rested her hand on the table. Her nails were painted a bright pink color. Some of them were chipped at jagged places, like she’d been scratching a chalkboard. “Is there something you need, Keira?” Her voice was quiet.

  “Can I sit down?”

  She was flustered by the question. “Sure…”

  I sat across from her so I could study her face at a vantage point. The circle around her eyes was more noticeable from this proximity. “Liam told me everything.” I didn’t see the point in beating around the bush.

  “Oh.”

  “You already know I went through something very similar. He abused me and took advantage of my weakness. It wasn’t real love. To him, it was just a sick game of control. He liked bossing me around and telling me what to do. He got off to it. And when I didn’t obey, I paid the price. I justified it most of the time because I thought I loved him. But in the end, it wasn’t healthy and I got out. I almost lost my life, but I survived and got through it. No matter how much you think this guy means to you, he’s not worth it. Adrianna, get out.”

  She spun the highlighter in her manicured hands and kept her eyes glued to the table.

  “Liam wants to help. Let him in.”

  “I appreciate you taking the time to talk to me, but really, I’m fine. I can take care of myself. But thanks.”

  I hated the way she brushed me off. “Did he apologize and say he would never do it again?” Judging the look in her eyes, I knew he had. “Adrianna, he’s lying. He will lose his temper again and you will be the object of his release. Don’t believe for a second he’ll change or learn the error of his ways. If he has to exert his power over you by force, then he’s nothing but a weak and pathetic man.”

  She stopped spinning the highlighter, her body becoming stealthly still. She didn’t breathe. The blue color of her eyes was suddenly brighter, more noticeable. Whatever she was thinking, I didn’t have a clue.

  “Let me help you,” I begged. “You deserve so much more…”

  Adrianna took a deep breath while she held my gaze. “I know you despise me, so the fact you’re taking time out of your day to help me says wonders about you, but like I said to Liam, I fell.”

  Why was she in such denial? “Don’t let him threaten you. If the cops can’t protect you and the judge can’t, Liam can. Believe me.”

  She packed her things and shoved them into her bag. “I appreciate the concern, but it’s misplaced.” She shouldered her bag then left the table. “Don’t waste your time worrying about me.”

  I watched her go, feeling pathetic. Since she always wore slutty clothes and threw herself at any man who would take her, I knew she had low self-esteem. But the only attention she drew to herself was bad attention. Maybe she assumed this was the love she deserved. Perhaps she misinterpreted his anger for passion. I knew I did…

  “How’d it go?” Liam asked as soon as I walked into the house.

  I shook my head. “She denied it.”

  He cursed then gripped his hair. “What the hell is wrong with her?”

  “I don’t know…” This was hard on both of us. “From what I remember of my time…with him….was that I couldn’t be helped until I wanted it. My parents always tried to keep him away from me. They didn’t like him and strongly disapproved. Every time they tried to pull me out, I got sucked in again. Only when I was mentally prepared for the severance did I reach out. I risked my life to be free of him forever. That’s how far I was willing to go to get away from him. But until then…there’s nothing you can do.”

  He clenched his jaw. “I don’t accept that.”

  “But you have to…”

  He moved to the couch and sat down with a sigh. “I hope Adrianna changes her mind. We could have her live at your house with Scotty to keep her safe if we need to. Shit, she could stay here if that’s what it takes.”

  “Like I said, she doesn’t want help.”

  He leaned back and stared at the opposite wall.

  I hated to do this but I had to. “I have to go.”

  “Where?” His attention was back on me. The need was in his voice. We would normally head to his room at this time of night even though we wouldn’t sleep for hours.

  “I’m…teaching a class.” It was the first time I admitted it.

  He cocked an eyebrow. “A class? What are you talking about?”

  “I applied to be a mentor for a woman’s support group…women who were abused or are still being abused. I just thought I could help someone. You know, tell them my story and convince them they can be free too.”

  Liam gave me a look I’d never seen before. His eyes were heavy with emotion, and a darkness crept into them. His body tensed visibly then released again. He held my gaze, never backing down. I had no idea what he was thinking. He released a breath from his lungs then placed both of his massive hands on my face. “You’re the most incredible woman I’ve ever known.”

  There were many things I expected him to say, but that wasn’t one of them.

  “I’ve never known a stronger person, and I’m so proud of you. You’ve come so far, Keira.”

  “Because of you…”

  “No.” His command sliced through the air. “I may have helped you but you did this all on your own. You can fight now. You’re strong. You’ve gained back the life you’ve lost. The girl I once knew isn’t here anymore. Now she’s solid like steel and tough like rubber. Nothing can break her or shake her. Now you’re uncrushable.”

  Warm tears bubbled under my eyes then broke the surface. Like drops of rain on a window, they leaked down and streaked, leaving a visible mark in their path. My mouth opened slightly, and an involuntary gasp came from my lips. I swallowed the lump in my throat and closed my eyes.

  Liam wiped them away with the pads of his thumbs. “I hope those are happy tears…”

  I nodded. “They are...”

  He closed his eyes for a span of a heartbeat then opened them. A tear came loose and fell down his cheek. His eyes reddened and the moisture built. “Mine are happy tears too.”

  I was nervous. I’d never done this before or anything like it. I always blended into the background, not wanting to be noticed. The less attention I drew to myself, the better. But I couldn’t hide this time. Even though I was here to help others, I was helping me at the same time.

  The chairs were placed in a circle, all facing the middle. I sat at the front of the class and waited for the attendees to show up. My hands were cold but they wer
e sweating at the same time. I’d never led a lesson before. All I had to rely on were my own experiences. Liam was the first person I was open with, telling him everything that happened.

  But that needed to change.

  When members started to join me, I studied their faces. They all had the same characteristic; fear. I could see it in their eyes. They were afraid to tackle their emotions, or perhaps they were afraid their abuser would find out what they were up to. Or maybe they were scared they actually showed up.

  Every person had similar body language. They were closed off, crossing their arms over theirs chests and the legs at the knee. No one made direct eye contact with me. They stared at the floor or the wall. Some people stared at their phones to pass the time. When every seat was filled, I knew it was time to begin.

  I cleared my throat, making it obvious I was just as nervous as they were. “Hi, I’m Keira.”

  A few women whispered a greeting to me. Others nodded. One even waved.

  “Let’s go around and introduce ourselves.” That was a simple way to begin.

  The girls read off their names clockwise. I tried to remember them all but I had a feeling I would have a slip-up. There were ten of them, and they were all different ages. One girl in particular caught my attention. She looked like she was still in high school. She might be in college. It was hard to tell. She had black hair and wore heavy make up. Her smoky eyes drew attention to her face, but she looked like she wanted to be unnoticed.

  “Stacy,” she whispered when her turn came.

  I nodded. “Thanks for coming tonight.”

  Okay. Now what do I do?

  I just decided to be honest. “I’ve never done this before…as you probably figured out by looking at me. But when I saw the notice on my campus, I was drawn to join you for these sessions. All I really have to offer you is my own experience.” I swallowed the lump in my throat. “Which was very painful.”

  They all stared at me, waiting for me to continue. “It’s my hope that my past can change your future or help you sort through the pain. I was just a girl in high school when I was abused. He was older than me, and I had a crush on him for the longest time. When we got together, I couldn’t believe how lucky I was he picked me. My parents never approved, and now I wish I had listened to them. His sweet whispers quickly turned into random bouts of anger. When he started to hit me, he apologized and I forgave him. By the time things got really bad, I was in too deep. I couldn’t get away because his hold on me was too tight. I actually thought he might kill me…and he almost did.”

  The sympathy moved into their eyes. New light emerged on their faces. I could see the connection and the trust. At least I was getting somewhere.

  “When I finally decided to end it, I knew there was a good chance I wouldn’t survive. But I chose to risk it in the hope of a better life. Being with him was unbearable. He was controlling and jealous, and at the time I didn’t realize this, but he was cheating on me left and right. He used me, never really caring about me. My parents told me to end it, but being a brat that I was, I didn’t listen. And the night I finally decided to do it, they heard me sneak out and followed me. But they were hit by a drunk driver…they died because of me.” I felt the tears bubble up and fall down my cheeks. I hated thinking about what I did to my parents, the people who loved me unconditionally since the day I was born. I sniffed then wiped them away.

  “For the following year, I hid from the world. The only person I trusted was my cousin Scotty. He took care of me and accompanied me everywhere I went. I swore off men and flinched when a guy even looked at me. I turned to alcohol to drown out my problems, but that never did anything. When my cousin finally suggested that I see a specialist, I rejected the idea immediately. No one could help me…

  “But then I met someone very special. Disguised as a muscled fighter, he was the gentlest man I ever knew, nothing like the package he came in. After he told me he lost his sister to an abuser, I knew our souls were from the same origin. He picked up the pieces and put me back together—for the most part. He gave me the push I needed, but I’ve been doing the rest. Now my nightmares are gone. I’m not scared to be alone with a man. I’m not scared of anything. He helped me get there but I did the rest on my own. I say this to inspire you…if I could do it you can do it. And I’m here to help.”

  After I finished my speech, I surveyed the faces around me. I had their undivided attention. One woman’s eyes were tinted with red. Another one looked choked up.

  “Would anyone like to share?” I asked gently.

  Stacy met my gaze before she straightened herself in her seat. “I left my parents’ house as soon as I turned eighteen. My boyfriend and I have been together since high school, and when he asked me to move in I jumped at the request. But…he started to get controlling. He didn’t want me to hang out with my friends at first, and then he didn’t want me to go out altogether. Now he keeps me cooped up in the house, never allowed to go out and see anyone. I can’t even call my parents. When he thinks I’m not looking, he checks my phone. And anytime I don’t do as he asks…he hits me.”

  That sounds too familiar. “Stacy, you need to get out.”

  “But I can’t,” she said sadly. “I have nowhere to go. I don’t have money or a job. Besides…he’ll hurt me worse.”

  “Tell your parents the truth.” I didn’t put too much pressure on her. I was simply nudging her.

  She shook her head. “I said some pretty mean things to them…”

  “But they still love you. Believe me, when you tell them what’s going on, all that will be water under the bridge.”

  Her eyes welled up but she blinked them back. “I’m not even sure they can protect me…”

  “They can. You have to take the chance. Staying their forever isn’t the answer. Maybe he beats you now and you can tolerate it, but it will only get worse over time. And one day, he may lose his temper. And he could kill you.” I didn’t say this to scare her, just to make her understand how serious it was.

  She rubbed her hands up and down her arms. “You’re right…”

  “I went through the same thing,” another woman said quietly. “No matter what I did, I made him mad. If I didn’t make dinner right, he slapped me across the face. I was isolated from everyone around me. My friends turned their backs on me because I stopped calling. My family gave up trying to see me. He took my life away from me. Running was the best decision I ever made. I formed a support group of family and friends after I told them the truth. With a defense like that, he couldn’t touch me. And my husband now…he makes me feel safe.”

  This was going exactly the way I wanted. Everyone was getting involved, working out their own problems while trying to help someone else.

  “He’d kill me if he knew I was here…” Stacy shivered visibly.

  “And we would kill him,” I threatened. “You’re only as weak as you let him make you. Any man who subdues a woman through violence is innately weak. He can’t exert his power in any other way. And if you defy him, you will win.”

  “You make it sound so easy,” Stacy whispered.

  “No, it wasn’t easy at all.” I shook my head. “It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life. I wish things had been different. I wish I broke up with him when my parents told me to. I should have listened. But living in regret won’t change what happened. I’m responsible for what happened to my parents, and that regret will always burn in my heart. But I know they would be happy that I made it out of that relationship. If there’s such a thing as heaven, that’s where they are. And they are glad to see where I am now. The best way I can honor them is to help others, not make their deaths end in vain.”

  “I’m sorry that happened to you,” Stacy said.

  “Thank you,” I said. “And I’m sorry about what happened to you.”

  A blonde tucked her hair behind her ear. “This man who helped you…is he still around?”

  I nodded. “He’s my best friend in the world, th
e other side to my coin, and the yin to my yang. He makes me feel safe, but more importantly, he made me feel strong. He never gave up on me when I was weak, never accepting less than what I deserved. He brought me back to life, because I was just a ghost before he came along. He was my savior, and I want to be that for you.”

  The group stared at me, their eyes full of emotion.

  “Would anyone else like to share?” I asked.

  A few other women came forward and talked about their abusive partners. While Finn was horrible to me, these girls had it worse. They used knives to make them submit, taking abuse to a new level. There was no time to waste. They needed to get out and they needed to get out fast.

  “There’s women’s protective services,” one girl announced. “You could always call them.”

  “No one can protect me from Roger.” The girl rubbed her hands together anxiously. “Not even the cops. They might throw him back in jail, but as soon as he gets out, he’ll come for me. And this time with vengeance.”

  “Then you better be ready for him,” the other woman said. “I took a few self-defense classes. It helps me sleep at night.”

  “And getting a new man helps too,” another woman said with a smile.

  It was the first time someone lightened the mood.

  By the end of the session, I knew we made substantial progress. I hoped the women who were still with their abusers would act quickly and leave their situations, but I knew from experience it couldn’t be rushed. They needed to do it on their own. That decision stayed with them.

  Most of the women hugged me, saying the session hit them right where it hurt. Their words of gratitude caught me off guard. I felt like I wasn’t doing enough for them, but I gave them everything I had.

  After they left the room, I started to fold and stack the chairs. The classroom was in the old library so everything was worn and frayed. After I put the last chair down, I took a deep breath while I stared at the wall.