Dirty Fake Fiancé

by Sky Corgan

  “Get out of here. Why do all the good things happen to you?”

  “I wouldn’t exactly say that all the good things happen to me. Would you?”

  “No, but that’s crazy. So, do you have to sleep with him or something?”

  “That's what’s bothering me. I mean, what if he expects sex as part of the deal?”

  “Errh, is he ugly?”

  “No.”

  “Short?”

  I chuckle. “Far from it.”

  “So he’s a hot, rich guy who wants to pay you like one hundred per day to stay with him, and you're worried he's going to want you to sleep with him? I do not see a problem here,” she teases.

  “He looks a lot like Brad Pitt when he was in Inglourious Basterds, and he’s giving me two hundred and fifty dollars per night for three nights," I correct her with a smirk.

  “That’s nearly a grand! Lenka, you need to send me pictures. I want loads of photos.”

  I sigh as I think about my cheap phone with the bad graphics.

  “I don’t know if I should be doing this. I’m not a prostitute.”

  She tuts. “I know that. You’re not exactly hanging out on street corners. Besides, you could be jumping the gun. He asked you to pretend to be his fiancée. I doubt he'd try anything. I mean, he’s hardly going to tell everyone that you’re his fiancée and then start making you hostile towards him. That’d be a bit weird. Don’t you think?”

  “I suppose.” I bite my lip.

  “Hey, I have to go. They say I’m making too much noise and should be cleaning.”

  I imagine one of the nurses telling her to get off her phone.

  “Sure, I’ll speak to you later.”

  “Have fun with Brad,” she giggles before hanging up.

  I want to tell her that his name is Danny, but I doubt it would make any difference.

  I decide that I’ll have a little something to eat, seeing as there’s a tray on the dining table with a silver cover. I lift it up to see a variety of hors d'oeuvres. I can't identify most of what's on the plate, but I haven’t had a decent meal in about two days, so it really doesn't matter what they are as long as they're edible.

  I eat most of the hors d'oeuvres and then return to the bed, finding myself feeling restless, wishing that Danny would come back so that I don't have to be so bored anymore.

  I take the time to call in from work on the yacht so that my mom doesn't get fired for missing this job. The call goes straight to her boss' voicemail. I say my peace and fake a cough before hanging up.

  With that done, I'm bored again. The only thing left to do is fantasize about Danny touching and kissing me in this suite. I wouldn’t say no. I can’t remember the last time I’ve been with a man.

  I lie down, and before I know it, I’m asleep. This is the first time in a long time I’ve got some zs. If Danny wants to pay me to sleep while he walks around the boat, then that’s fine by me. Not only do my feet feel tired, but so does every bone in my aching body.

  CHAPTER THREE

  DANNY

  Why won't she leave me alone? Harper saw me kissing Lenka before boarding the yacht, and she still insists on speaking to me.

  Fuck!

  She has a way of making me feel a rage with just a smile that no one else ever has.

  “Danny, I’m so glad you could make it.” Her blue eyes dart from Adele to me.

  This is the kind of attitude that always used to wind me up. It’s my sister’s engagement/wedding party. Why the hell wouldn’t I make it?

  She’s acting as if she invited me.

  Adele takes my arm and leads me away. She knows that I’m ready to blow. “Bro, be nice.”

  I’m just about to open my mouth when I see Harper attempting to kiss and hug my parents as if they’re old friends. Mom steps back like she's seen a ghost. At least someone in our family has some sense.

  “I thought you said Mom was cool with Harper being here. Doesn’t look like it. Shoot, Adele, did you lie to me? And them, too?”

  Adele avoids my gaze, which gives me my answer.

  Mom rushes towards me. “Danny, darling, if I had known, I would have said something.”

  So, Sis lied to all of us. She never told anyone that Harper was coming.

  Mom grabs my hand and whispers, “We can make a run for it. The boat hasn’t left yet.”

  I nod, thinking that we’ll leave Dad and Sis on the yacht. The wedding’s not even taking place on board. They're having it at Tarrytown House Estate. That’s where the rehearsal dinner is, too. Technically we don’t need to stay on the boat. We'd only miss the engagement party.

  “You are not leaving this boat!” Adele says.

  Mom looks down as if she’s a little kid who just got caught stealing candy.

  Dad walks over. “Well, this is a bit awkward,” he says in his British accent that after forty years of living in the States hasn’t faded one bit.

  “Everyone, just calm down.” I sigh. “We can do this. It’s Adele’s wedding, and we need to just get along.” I think about Lenka in my room. I brought her here for a reason. To help keep Harper at bay.

  Mom looks at Dad, and I know what she’s thinking. She remembers when Harper said that Dad had made sexual advances towards her. Another lie. Harper tried to harm everyone in this family in one way or another.

  I decide to leave the drama behind and go to my suite. Even though Dad offered me some of the A. H. Hirsch Reserve that he has, I had to decline.

  The band starts playing as I'm leaving the deck, and then I see Candy. She’s strutting her stuff, and wow, the girl can sing. I thought she was going to be waitressing along with Lenka. I shrug when she winks at me, and Adele throws me a quizzical look.

  I head down to my suite, and Harper starts to follow me. Luckily for me, one of Harper’s old friends spots her and steps in her path.

  I use my key to get into my suite, and I’m shocked to find Lenka sleeping on the bed. She looks so peaceful sprawled out like an eagle. Judging by the lack of space in the suite, my only option is sleeping on the wooden floor. I should have checked the room before agreeing to take it.

  I grab a glass and pour some wine, looking out at the view. I need to relax and stop being so tense. I take a sip of wine, and then I hear Lenka jump out of bed.

  “Sorry! I didn’t mean to,” she says with a frightened look on her face.

  “Sleep?” I ask. I didn’t want to wake her, but I must have, and now I feel a bit guilty about it. “I want you to feel at home. I don’t want you to be anything but yourself.”

  She giggles. “And your fiancée.”

  I incline my head. “Yes, that too. If anyone asks, just say we met at my favorite diner, Sweet Chick, and that that's where I proposed to you."

  She nods. “Okay. But don't I need to know more about you?”

  I think of myself as a simple man. There’s nothing incredibly interesting that needs sharing. “I live on the Upper East side. I own Turner Holdings, which is one of the biggest advertising companies in NY. I have three cars, but I tend to drive my Porsche the most, which isn’t often because Henry, my driver, takes me most places. I play squash with my friend Carl on Fridays and…”

  "Are you friends with the groom?” She seems genuinely interested.

  “We went to college together. We were inseparable back then. I would never tell Adele the truth, but when they first started dating, I wasn’t too keen.” Carl had a bad reputation in college. So fucking bad that when he told me he was dating my sister, the last thing I wanted to do was give him my blessing.

  My friend and my sister, sometimes it feels too close for comfort, but then other times I look at them and think they’re made for each other. Carl says he put his college days behind him. He hasn't shown any shady behavior since he started dating Adele, so I'm inclined to believe him.

  “Anyway, my dad’s British,” I continue. “You’ll like him; he's funny. Mom, on the other hand, she’s more like me.”

  “Oh?” Len
ka gives me a curious look.

  “She’s a pussy cat. Anything else that you need to know?”

  Her eyes dart around the suite as if searching for something else to ask, and then I realize something. “I don’t know anything about you.” I’ve been talking about myself, leaning against the window and watching her on the bed.

  She mumbles something and then says out loud, “I’m twenty-three years old.”

  Fuck, she’s a baby. More of a hot sexy kitten!

  “I have a brother who’s a senior in high school. He’s going to be a professional football player, so I do all that I can to support him.”

  “Oh.” I raise an eyebrow. "What about your parents?"

  “They're both from Russia," she tells me. "My father left when Scott, my brother, learned how to walk.”

  I take a deep breath. “Your mom?”

  “She’s not well,” she says a bit too quickly, avoiding eye contact. It's obvious that talking about her parents makes her uncomfortable.

  “And waitressing is your full-time job?”

  “Not exactly.” She sighs, then finally looks at me, her expression changing like a calming wind has washed over her. "You forgot something."

  "What do you mean?" I furrow my brow in confusion.

  “There’s no ring!” She lifts up her hand to show me her bare fingers.

  “Crap! Give me one minute, I’ll think of something. Don’t go anywhere!” I say before taking my leave.

  I only know of one person who has an engagement ring, and as much as she’s going to hate doing this, she lied to get me on the boat. She owes me a favor, and I need her ring.

  As soon as I spot Adele talking to some of her girlfriends, I go up to her and grab her by the arm.

  “What now?” She rolls her eyes.

  “I need to speak to you for a minute.”

  “Now?" She hesitates before turning to her friends. "Sorry about this, ladies. I'll be right back.”

  Gillian winks at me. She’s in my black book, a little secret between us. Nothing serious. When the need arises, I call her, and she comes running naked!

  I drag Adele away to her suite so we can talk in private. She’s not happy, but then she knows that neither am I because Harper’s on the yacht.

  “Okay, so you have me in my suite.” She crosses her arms over her chest. “If you want to give me another lecture about Harper, forget it. I've already heard it from both Mom and Dad.”

  I scowl at her and sit down on the bed. “Did you talk to Harper about staying away from the rest of the family?”

  Adele shakes her head. “I didn’t because this is supposed to be my wedding and I'm not supposed to be worrying about this bullshit.” She drops herself heavily onto the bed beside me.

  I get distracted as I look around her white suite and think that it's completely different from mine. The dark wooden flooring and lighting give it a more expensive feel than the room I'm staying in.

  I lie back and gaze up at the ceiling.

  “You haven’t noticed, have you?” she says.

  I bend my head back, wondering what I’ve missed. "What?"

  "Carl isn't here," Adele replies softly. "He called to say that he got held up at work and will meet us at Tarrytown House tomorrow.”

  I roll over onto my side. “So, he can miss his engagement party, but I can’t? What the fuck?”

  “Danny!” She hits me. “I don’t think I could go through this without you.”

  “Please! It’s the groom that you need, not me.” I realize then that Carl not being around makes what I need to ask a lot less awkward. “Well, if Carl isn't here yet, then he won't mind if I borrow your engagement ring for a little while."

  She jumps up. “I just told you that the groom’s not here, and you want my ring. Why?”

  “You invited the devil to your party. I got someone to be my fiancée, and the only way that she’s going to convince anyone is if she has a ring on her finger.”

  Adele laughs. “Wow, you really went all out. Where did you get the poor soul from? Does she know about the dead animals?”

  I shake my head.

  “Or about the one that ended up in the hospital?”

  Again, I shake my head, thinking about the time that Harper met my old secretary and tried to beat her up, accusing her of sleeping with me in the office. She saw Harriet bending down to pick her pen up off the floor, and Harper decided that she must have been giving me a blowjob. She waited for her in the parking lot. Harper’s kickboxing classes were put to use, and Harriet ended up in the hospital.

  I sigh. "Harper's bad fucking news and you know it. I don’t get why you let her on the boat?”

  Adele doesn’t say another word. She simply hands me the ring, tears cascading down her cheeks.

  “Hey, no tears," I tell her, knowing she's worried that Carl might not show. "It’ll be okay. You’ll have the wedding of a lifetime. You wait and see.”

  I’ll fucking kill Carl if he stands my sister up on her wedding day!

  She smiles at me weakly, and I'm beginning to get the feeling that there's a bigger story behind her concern. I know that she’ll tell me in her own time, but for now, I’ve got to give Lenka the ring.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  LENKA

  Part of me was relieved when Danny left the room. The kiss, the way he speaks, his accent. Bryony’s right. Not only is he hot, but he’s turning me on, and he doesn’t even have to try. I kept thinking of inviting him to join me on the bed.

  When I hear a knock at the door, I assume it’s him.

  “Oh!” I open the door to a blonde-haired woman, the one Danny's been trying to avoid. She pushes past me as if she belongs in his suite. “Danny’s not here,” I inform her.

  “I know!" She slams the door shut behind her. Something tells me she’s not here to say hello. “I want to know what you’re doing in the same suite as him?” she demands.

  “He’s my fiancé.” Holy crap, that didn't sound convincing. I should have just said that I’m with him. She’s caught me completely off-guard.

  She squints her eyes at me, obviously not believing me. “None of his friends know you, and I don't see a ring on your finger."

  She makes me feel inferior. It’s as if she’s the popular girl. The one that everyone would follow back in high school just because they were bullies and no one had the guts to stand up to them.

  As if right on cue, Danny opens the door and says, “I’ve got it!” When his eyes land on the blonde woman, anger takes over his expression. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

  She walks towards him. “It seems that she thinks you guys are getting married.”

  “We are, Harper. Get over it, and get out of our room. There’s a restraining order in place for a reason.”

  His words don’t seem to phase her. She moves slowly as Danny holds the door open for her to exit. Before she leaves, she winks at me, sending a chill down my spine.

  He slams the door shut and blurts out, “I should have warned you about her. Sit down. We need to talk. I'll tell you everything. That girl is a fucking psycho.”

  I sit and take a deep breath, thinking about our encounter just now. If Danny hadn’t walked in then, what would she have done?

  I’ve got a feeling this job’s going to be a lot more difficult than he made it out to be. I have a feeling these next three days are going to be a living hell.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  DANNY

  I tell Lenka everything about my past with Harper, and I can see that she's afraid. I leave nothing out, divulging every nasty incident where Harper tried to hurt someone just because she thought they were too close to me.

  "Do you still want to do this?" I ask when I'm done telling the story.

  She hesitates before nodding, and relief sweeps through me. To be honest, I thought she might want to back out. And who could blame her? Now that she knows the full magnitude of what she's dealing with, it would be natural to want to run in the other direction.
>
  "We should be seen together if you want people to think we're really engaged," she suggests.

  “Here, this is the ring." I hand it over to her with a smile. "Remember, I proposed to you in the place we first met.”

  She slides it onto her finger, taking a moment to admire it.

  I sigh as I think about tonight. "I'm going to head out onto the deck. Get changed and join me when you're ready."

  There’s only one way I’m going to find out if we can pull this off, and that’ll be up on deck. I take my leave, shutting the door behind me, then I head up to the deck with everyone else. Maybe after socializing for a bit, I’ll join Dad for some bourbon. I wish I could drink right now, but I need to have a clear head.

  As I walk up the stairs, I find the party in full swing. Earlier, Candy didn’t want to give up her suitcase, but as I suspected, she’s managed to find a long black dress that’s stunning on her. She sings, and everyone starts to dance. She has a sultry voice, one that I'm sure has had many men begging for her number. There's a crowd of guys watching her, so I know I'm not far off the mark.

  I bob my head to the beat, wondering if maybe I should have hopped in the shower before coming up on deck. I’ve managed to lose the jacket and tie, but I still feel stiff. The guys are wearing summer shirts. Dad’s in his usual polo and pants. And the ladies are leaving little to the imagination.

  Mom starts to head towards me. I pick up a glass of champagne and get another one for her. She’s empty-handed and doesn’t seem as uptight as when she first saw Harper.

  Harper’s in the middle of the dance floor tearing it up.

  “She always was a good dancer,” Mom says as she catches me watching Harper.

  I nod. “We have to be here for Adele.”

  “Seeing as the groom couldn’t be bothered to do it. We really do need to be here for her. Did he call you?”

  I shake my head. “He better turn up, Mom, otherwise I swear that I’ll…” I should have called him the second Adele informed me that he wasn't on board, but I was so caught up in protecting myself from Harper. If that bastard doesn't make it, I'm going to fucking kill him.