Eros & Capricorn: A Cross-Cultural Survey of Sexual Attitudes and Techniques (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior Book 1)
Page 10
Essentially, this mental technique is much the same as those patent medicines sold to retard the male climax, nerve-deadening creams which may have some value in some cases. Whether one applies an anesthetic ointment or contemplates the Dow-Jones averages, the same principle is involved. Orgasm is delayed because the experience is rendered less exciting, the response—sensory or mental—is less acute, and the act is, on balance, less enjoyable.
Many of us are no doubt familiar with the story of the mathematician who, while embracing his wife, attempted to refrain from reaching orgasm by attempting to figure out the value of pi to thirty decimal places. He became so engrossed in this mental agility that he utterly forgot to finish making love to his wife! It is unlikely that many lovers would be so singularly absentminded, but the point would seem to be clear. And it is true that sexual anesthesia, whether induced through a cream or through a feat of mental acrobatics, may result in a loss of erection before copulation is completed.
The mental disciplines more likely to retard orgasm are twofold. First of all, a man must in one way or another develop the sort of mental attitude that will make him wholeheartedly desire to prolong coitus. Men who secretly or unconsciously find copulation to be evil, unpleasant, or in any other way undesirable may ejaculate prematurely in an effort to be done with the performance. Others are mainly concerned with completing the act as soon as possible so that they will be “rewarded” with the pleasure of orgasm. When a man is motivated in either of these ways, he must school himself to regard the prolongation of coitus as wholly desirable, both to ensure satisfaction for his partner and to enhance his own enjoyment of the act.
It seems evident that delaying orgasm does increase the male’s enjoyment of the act, and not only in the sense that it gives him pride in his prowess and satisfaction at having pleased his partner. On the one hand, it increases his pleasure in that any distinctly pleasurable experience—in this case, coitus—becomes more enjoyable the longer it is carried on, barring such countermanding factors as boredom, fatigue, or irritation. Additionally, there is the generally acknowledged fact that the satisfaction of the male climax is to a degree in proportion to the amount of time spent in preparation for it. In the vernacular, prolonged coitus enables the male to “build up a good head of steam” and reach a heightened climax.
By ridding himself of attitudes tending to hasten orgasm, a male may influence his staying power to a marked degree. Still greater results may be attained by cultivating a mental attitude that leaves one fully responsive to sexual stimulation without fostering an immediate need for orgasm. The ideal attitude is almost schizoid; it enables the male to be wholly involved in coitus without being compelled by it—compelled, that is, toward orgasm.
In an earlier chapter on aphrodisiacs, the sexual properties of marijuana were delineated at some length, and in this context we discussed the drug’s occasional effect of prolonging coition almost indefinitely. This mental attitude engendered by marijuana, this involvement-cum-detachment, permits extensive copulation without climax. Certain evidence would seem to indicate that other drugs, notably hallucinogens like mescaline and such experimental psychedelic drugs as LSD, have a somewhat similar effect under certain conditions and operate in much the same fashion.
The ideal object, of course, would be one of achieving the effect without using the drugs. There is no question that this may be done, but instructing an individual on how to acquire the skill is no simple matter. The literature of the Orient hints constantly at various techniques but rarely supplies a prescription.
It is somewhat more simple to pin down methods of retarding orgasm through physical means. By controlling the muscles of the body, the male may prevent himself from ejaculating, either to prolong coition or to avoid emitting semen entirely in the course of copulation. Although ineffective as an absolute birth-control measure (other secretions may carry sperm cells into the vagina, for example), this practice may have other values, among them being that it permits renewed coitus after a short interval instead of exhausting the male partner.
For many Orientals, retention of sperm assumed infinitely greater importance. It was thought that ejaculation robbed the male of energy, that sperm retained in the male’s body was absorbed into the bloodstream and contributed to his health, perception, strength, and general well-being. Thus the retention of sperm is at once a technique and a credo of Hatha Yoga, for example. The prophet Mohammed was supposed to have practiced retaining sperm all his life, and the sexual tension thus engendered no doubt contributed greatly to his visions and hallucinations. In our own time, Ghandi serves as a model of a sexual ascetic who deliberately provoked himself by taking young virgins into his bed and refraining from ejaculation.
(In this context, it might be worth mentioning that the Indian science of Yoga has two very definite objectives of which the average Westerner is not well aware. One is immortality; the other is increased sexual potency and sexual control. Arthur Koestler’s The Lotus and the Robot provides a particularly perceptive analysis of this aspect of Yoga, and interested readers would be well advised to refer to it.)
The retention of sperm is best accomplished through the development of muscular control, which does not come naturally to most persons. Certain muscles, usually thought of as involuntary, may be contracted in such a manner as to block the canal through which sperm pass in ejaculation. The necessary technical aptitude is best acquired through practice during urination, as essentially the same muscular control is required to stop urination voluntarily. Through frequent practice, the male makes the necessary mental connections to localize the precise muscles and to form a mental image of the process of contracting them at will. Then, occasional practice at other times strengthens these muscles and builds his control over them to the point where he may contract the muscle groups at will, even in the throes of passion, and thus effectively prevent ejaculation of semen.
As far as Oriental sexology is concerned, this prevention of ejaculation does not prevent a male from climaxing. On the contrary, the greater portion of the pleasure, relaxation, and satisfaction of orgasm occurs at the time when semen would be ejaculated in the absence of muscular constraint. In essence, a practitioner of semen retention experiences a climax without an ejaculation. He is not so exhausted afterward and is able to perform coitus a short while afterward—or to resume it at once, in many cases.
It is highly doubtful that many Occidentals would care to go through life in this fashion. Oriental superstition to the contrary, there is no scientific evidence to indicate that ejaculation seriously depletes the body or that retention of sperm is hygienically beneficial. On the contrary, sperm is sooner or later dispelled one way or another; if not in coitus, then in involuntary nocturnal emissions.
Nevertheless, the skill involved in retaining sperm would appear to be highly desirable for any man. The mental and muscular processes involved enable a male to achieve that dream state of being able to control the duration of coitus entirely, or, as the vulgar verse would phrase it,
I must allow it’s quite a thrill
When man can come and go at will.
—♦♦♦—
Physical Techniques for the Female
Most erotic manuals concentrate on the activity of the male, and this is rightly so—the male is the initiator and aggressor in sexual relations, and he most generally guides the course of sexual intercourse, setting its patterns and selecting its forms. One outcome of this has been a lack of emphasis—indeed, a de-emphasis—of those techniques by which a woman may increase her own and her partner’s enjoyment of sexual love.
That a woman should participate in the act, that her movements are an important part of it, is a tenet few would question. The joke of the Frenchman who was found making love to a corpse washed up on a beach and who explained that he did not know she was dead but thought she was an American shows by implication the popular view of the sexually adequate female as a sexually active female.
>
The basic motions of the female in coitus demand little in the way of explanation or description. In the main, they run parallel to those discussed earlier in this chapter as movements for the male. A few more specialized techniques for the female include those which require the prior development of muscular control, which the average woman, sexually experienced or not, does not possess. Several of these methods differ minutely, but they are alike in that they involve the ability to contract and expand the vagina at will. This muscular control, though not unknown in the West, has long been one of the legendary attributes of the accomplished Oriental courtesan. Speaking of such women endowed with this facility, the author of The Sultan’s Wives makes the following observation.
She can close herself up so that not a blade of grass may gain admittance, bearing down with power that would crush a man’s scepter utterly. And she can open herself wide enough to grant admission to a bull elephant…
Then put your weapon into her, and, moving not at all, suffer her to make the motion of open-and-shut, bearing down upon your weapon and then relaxing again and yet again, while pleasure washes over you like waves upon a beach, until your seed comes with a rush.
Eastern erotic literature holds little hint as to how this skill may be acquired. The same source notes that young girls are trained in the art from before puberty and in another context mentions “young women performing a display of physical prowess—they squat upon the ground, posing themselves so that they may pick up from bare earth a seed of bean, gripping it only with the lower mouth (i.e., the labia) and by this means holding and lifting it. When a woman can do this with a bean, what can she do with a celery stalk!” (In other words, if her skill enables her to contract the vagina so thoroughly as to pick up a tiny seed or bean, what tricks may she perform with a man’s sexual organ!)
Frank Harris apparently encountered a French girl who possessed the same ability, and he describes the sensation he experienced in coitus as one of being “milked.” The following passages record his description of and reactions to two such incidents—first with a young Negro girl in America and then with a French woman in Europe.
The next moment, I was in her and now she kept even better time than at first and somehow or other the thick, firm lips of her sex seemed to excite me more than anyone had ever excited me. Instinctively the lust grew in me and I quickened and as I came to the short, hard strokes, she suddenly slipped her legs together under me and closing them tightly held my sex as in a firm grip and then began “milking” me—no other word conveys the meaning—with extraordinary skill and speed, so that, in a moment, I was gasping and choking with the intensity of the sensation and my seed came in hot jets while she continued the milking movement, tireless, indefatigable!
With the French woman, Harris was thus awakened:
I was awakened suddenly by the acutest pang of pleasure I had ever felt, and found Jeanne on top of me. How she had managed it, I don’t know, but… my sensations were too intense to be abandoned. In a moment I had reversed our positions and was seeking a renewal of the delight, and not in vain: her sex gripped me and milked me, with an extraordinary strength and cleverness, such as I had never before imagined possible. Not even with Topsy had I experienced such intensity of pleasure.
Various pornographic works have suggested that this particular skill is best learned during female masturbation. The masturbating girl or woman learns how to control her vaginal muscles during sexual excitement and can practice various arts upon her finger that she will later put to use with a lover. In one such work, the “heroine” has been relating her erotic history to a sexual partner and has discussed her masturbatory habits at some length. She then makes the following observation.
I was, as you can see, a randy little devil of the lewdest sort, and was given to frigging myself furiously whenever granted the opportunity. I rapidly graduated from simple rubbing of my pretty little clitoris to wholesale jerking, first with finger and then with such objects as came to mind, such as candles and bananas. It was a valuable education. My hot little pussy learned how to stretch to admit the object, and learned next how to love it properly. All of the finest tricks I know were learned in this manner. My slit learned on a candle so that it could properly perform with a cock.
Selections such as that quoted above are often of dubious validity at best. Unlike many erotic works, hardcore pornography of this sort is written more to excite than to instruct, and the desire to construct a provocative scene overrides the requirements of truth. Yet this instance seems to have a certain claim to validity and is here offered for whatever it may be worth.
—♦♦♦—
Mechanical Aids
The various inventions designed for heightening sexual pleasure have never made a tremendous impression upon Western culture, although certain of them, most notably the “French tickler,” have gained a certain place in our sexual folklore. Although they have gained a firm foothold in Oriental erotic life, the introduction of mechanical elements into sex play and coitus, most notably through their introduction into the female sex organ, seems to run against the grain of Western sexuality. Some of these erotic contrivances, then, may merit a few words of description.
“French tickler” is a term that covers any number of devices. Fundamentally, it refers to a condom equipped with feathers, beads, or other protruding objects that extend into the vagina during coitus and bestow new or reaching sensations upon the female partner. French ticklers presently enjoy a slight underground sale in the United States and Europe. They are peddled more or less openly in Mexican border towns as a staple item for sale to American tourists, offered by the same peddlers who specialize in cantharides, lewd photographs, and the like. In the Orient—most particularly India and Japan—these devices are offered more openly for sale and seem to be used by natives; they are not solely a novelty item for curious visitors.
The Autumn 1962 issue of Eros includes an article entitled “My Quest For A French Tickler In Japan,” by Mimi Sheraton, in which the author describes her experiences at a Japanese sex store. Stores of this sort, much publicized in recent times, offer a wide variety of erotic items ranging from aphrodisiacs to mechanical devices such as French ticklers. An illustration accompanying the article shows several of the ticklers, condoms with multicolored rubber protuberances, assorted bands, and ribbon-like extensions at their tips.
It seems possible that French ticklers might have a certain effect in heightening a female’s sexual response. Areas of the vaginal canal that normally get little direct stimulation might be affected, and such organs as the cervix might be stimulated more than they would otherwise. To an Occidental, however, the ticklers are distinctly “funny” in appearance, and it is more likely that the average female would find the device ridiculous than that she would be sexually moved by it. Miss Sheraton reports that she suggested as much to an American soldier whom she advised against buying a French tickler. “‘No girl would do anything but laugh at you,’ I said. ‘Can you imagine how you would look with nothing on but a French tickler?’”
Devices built upon the same principle as the French tickler have been a basic element of Oriental sexology for centuries. Often they take the form of rings, either plain or studded, worn upon the penis. By both increasing the girth of the male organ and providing it with a textured surface, the sensual effect upon the female is increased. Hindu sexual manuals, ever conscious of the disproportionate union of men with small penises and women with large vaginas, especially endorse them in such cases. Discussing his sexual experience in India, Frank Harris offers the following description of one such device and its effect upon his young partner.
A few days later she drew out a “hedgehog” and showed it to me: it was a silver ring with a number of very tiny fine feathers brought in all round it. The ring was not closed and Mrs. Redfern slipped it over my thumb and said, “There; if you use that, you will make all the girls crazy for you.”
…That evening Wi
nnie was coming to spend a couple of hours with me. At first she seemed less passionate than usual, but after half an hour or so of love’s dalliance, when I thought she had reached the height of feeling, I slipped on the ring and began the final essay.
In a moment I knew that Mrs. Redfern was justified. Almost at once Winnie spread herself feverishly and soon for the first time began to move her body uncontrollably and utter strange sounds, now whimpering, now gasping, “Oh, I can’t stand it; oh, stop, please; or I shall go mad! Oh! Oh! Oh!”
…Then began for me with Winnie an astonishing series of experiences. Passion provokes passion, and when one gives intense pleasure one is summoned to try again. And again and again I tried and each time with some new thrill of delight.
The Chinese silver clasp is a further refinement; fastened around the base of the erect male organ, it constricts the blood vessels and thus perpetuates the erection. This Chinese device is often employed in conjunction with alum, to constrict the vaginal opening, and various irritants, to heighten the stimulation for both male and female.
The famous Japanese golden balls are still another mechanical means of heightening excitement in coitus, illustrating the tremendous degree of invention displayed by humankind in the endless search for the perfect orgasm. The balls are hollow inside, with bells fitted into them. They are inserted deep into the vagina until they touch the mouth of the womb. Then coitus is performed, and the motions of the female in coitus cause the bells to ring melodiously, an effect alleged to be highly stimulating to both man and woman. It would seem that whatever effect the bells might have is psychological rather than physiological; perhaps the touch of the exotic that they add acts as a stimulant.