Masquerade (Vampires Realm Romance Series Book 10)

by Heaton, F E

  When she had emerged from the small office where the Vehemens had set himself up, she had seen Vivek entering the one the Tenebrae had chosen. Vivek hadn’t looked at her. She had hoped that he would because it would have given her the strength to tell him that she was sorry about Nikolaus. He had closed the door and she had taken to scanning the faces of those waiting in the elegant cream hallway outside the reception rooms, searching for the man from the maze. All of the guests had been unmasked and she couldn’t recognise the man amongst them. There were men that almost matched him but they weren’t of her bloodline.

  The mansion was growing quieter now but Sophis still couldn’t relax. She couldn’t get her mind off the man or Vivek, and thinking about what she was going to do was turning her stomach acidic. There had to be a way she could find some sort of inner peace and release her tension.

  She glanced across the wide expanse of black silk sheets to her sire. He lay on top of the covers, fast asleep, his dark hair ruffled and wild and his body nude from the waist up. He had insisted she go with him to his rooms when he had found her standing in the hall looking lost. She had thought to refuse him, but had decided she might be able to question him about their family and see if he knew anyone of rank who matched the description of her man. It was possible that he didn’t live in the mansion and had come in for the ball, just as her sire had.

  Her sire hadn’t been very forthcoming on the topic and had seemed displeased that she was asking about the man who had stolen her from him during the waltz. When he had pressed her into saying why she was so interested in the man, she had lied and said that it was only curiosity behind her desire to know who the man was. It was better her sire didn’t know what had happened after the dance, although the darkness in the look he had given her before changing the topic had made it clear that he knew she had done something she felt was wrong.

  Why did she feel it was wrong?

  Vivek flashed across her mind, his hurt expression cutting her as deeply and painfully as a holy wood stake.

  Sophis hugged her knees to her chest and rested her chin on them, her back against the thick carved mahogany column in one corner of the four-poster bed.

  Why did she feel as though she was hiding from him in this room?

  She had thought about returning to her own small room several times but she couldn’t bring herself to go through with it. Each time she went to leave, she paused at the door and returned to the bed, using the excuse that her sire would be angry if she left the room while he was sleeping. She was the reason he was here after all. He hadn’t returned to the mansion for the ball. He had come to speak with her about everything she had mentioned in her letters and offer her support, even going as far as holding her while she let it all pour out in some dire hope it would ease the pain in her heart. Speaking to him hadn’t made her feel better. It had only made her feel worse about what she had done tonight. It had only made her want to see Vivek even more than she already had, increasing that need from a minor desire to a full-blown urge to find him and confront him about everything.

  She wanted to know if he still felt something for her.

  She needed to know if she had made a terrible mistake tonight and there was still some small sliver of a chance for them. Her feelings for him hadn’t changed in all the years they had been at war with each other. She had buried them deep, trying to crush them out of existence, knowing that Vivek’s actions would only hurt her more if she still felt something beyond friendship for him. They had refused to die, had burned as embers in her heart, flaring back into life whenever her control slipped.

  Could he still feel something for her?

  When he had given his boots to her, she had seen a glimmer of the man he used to be, the one she had felt sure would become something more than just a friend to her someday.

  She needed to see him again and see whether she had just imagined that fleeting glimpse of the old Vivek or whether she had been right all along and he was still that man inside.

  The darkness of the walls and furnishings around her looked gloomy in the slender light from the single bedside lamp and did nothing to warm her mood and soothe her. The room felt more depressing than her own grey and uncomfortable one. Most of the guards in the family didn’t know anything better than their lumpy hard bed and tiny cramped rooms. She did. When she had been with her sire as a youngling, they had lived in a room like the one she was in now, lushly furnished and with two beds with mattresses and covers as soft as clouds. Sophis had thought she would gain a better room with the rank of captain, and she supposed she had in a way. At least she didn’t have to sleep in the basement with the other guards, sharing rooms.

  She stared at the curtains drawn across the windows and then at her sire. He shifted on the bed, smacking his lips together and rubbing his hair. At least someone could sleep. She blew out her breath, swung her legs over the side of the bed and stood. She had to get out of his depressing room and do something or she was going to go crazy.

  Sophis snuck to the door and then out into the hall. People were still coming and going, moving between the rooms, and the floor below still felt busy. She hurried along the hall and up the stairs to the second floor, and along the corridor to her room. The moment she entered, her gaze slid across to her dressing table and the red ball gown draped over the top of it. Her stomach tightened again, a knot forming in her chest. She pressed her hand there, trying to ignore the urge to find the man she had slept with, and opened the drawers, pulling out her dark grey sweatpants and a black tank.

  Perhaps some time in the training room would ease her and wear her out enough to sleep. Any activity during the day drained a vampire. For the first time in her immortal life, she might be thankful for that.

  She changed out of her uniform and into her training gear, tied her long hair up into a ponytail, and then headed out of her room and down through the house. It was strange to find the mansion so full of activity during the day. The sun had risen over two hours ago and the Law Keepers were still questioning people, but most of those awake on the first floor or relaxing on the ground floor were vampires who had already spoken with them.

  Sophis reached the entrance hall. She bowed her head and waited at the top of the stairs when she spotted Lincoln. He nodded in return and continued to ascend, carrying a sleeping Lady Lilith in his arms, cradling her to him with such tender care. Both of them still wore their ball attire, Lincoln’s arm beneath Lilith’s knees lost in the black waterfall of the skirt of her dress. He smiled when he reached the top step, a look that Sophis felt was supposed to convey his amusement that his mate had fallen asleep with the rising of the sun. Lady Lilith was still very young, practically a newly turned vampire, so it wasn’t surprising that she hadn’t been able to resist the lure of sleep. Sophis smiled politely at Lincoln and he continued down the hall, lowering his head and pressing a kiss to Lilith’s brow as he walked.

  Another image of Vivek flashed across Sophis’s mind and her insides squirmed again, her chest tightening with her turbulent emotions. He had carried her like that over a week ago when she had been poisoned, holding her so carefully in his arms, looking always ahead, only there hadn’t been love in his eyes as Lincoln had. There had been intense pain.

  Fear.

  It was clearer than ever now.

  He had feared for her.

  The feeling inside her worsened until she felt sick.

  Part of her said to ignore it and find the man, to see if there was a chance of something more happening between them, but she couldn’t get Vivek out of her head or her heart.

  She had to find him because thinking about what she had done last night and the horrible feeling that had twisted her gut when she had said that Vivek was less of a man than the one she had slept with, had her confused and she wasn’t sure how she felt anymore. If she could only find Vivek and speak to him, then she was sure that she would know her heart and his.

  She turned around, intent on heading back up to the second
floor and seeing if Vivek was in his room. No. She had come down here to train and she was going to do just that. It would clear her head and she would get some much needed sleep, and then she would speak to Vivek when she felt refreshed and was thinking straight.

  Sophis strode across the entrance hall and down the stone steps to the basement. She didn’t break her stride until she reached the training room and felt someone was already in there. She paused near the open door.

  Vivek.

  He worked with his bare back to her, his muscles twisting beneath his pale skin as he fought an invisible foe, blowing off steam just as she had come here to do. Or was he? It seemed like more than that as she watched him. He wasn’t going through the motions of a routine. He was pushing himself, honing his skills for the fight ahead, and she couldn’t help admiring his determination. This was the Vivek she used to know. He wanted to be at the top of his game and ready for anything.

  Her gaze worked over his back, following the line of his spine down from his broad shoulders, and stopped on the thick knot of scarring to one side of it. The sight of it still turned her stomach and caused anger to bubble through her, filling her with a dark need to make Izabella pay for what she had done. She would. Izabella and Aleksis would come with the next wave of hunters, she was sure of it, and Sophis would kill her and have her vengeance.

  Vivek shifted, turning towards his right before growling and moving left again, and her eyes dropped lower, admiring the lean length of his body. Two dents above his backside signalled a good place to stop but she failed to keep her eyes from continuing downwards to the waist of his pale grey sweats and his bottom.

  Sophis dragged her gaze up and it caught on his shoulders. The breadth of them and the power visible in his honed muscles as he continued to fight in the brightly lit pale room held her attention. She had always quietly admired his body whenever they had trained together. He worked hard to maintain his physique and it impressed her, along with the other women in the bloodline. She ground her teeth when she remembered Ella sitting on his lap, flirting with him.

  So what if her friend wanted Vivek. She had her own man to worry about now, didn’t she? Her stomach knotted again, an unsettled feeling squeezing it tight until she couldn’t breathe. She stared at Vivek, watching the dragon tattoos on his arms dancing with each swipe and strike he made. He knew she was here but he wasn’t stopping and he wasn’t turning to face her. He was ignoring her, and it hurt. She wanted to step into the room, catch his attention, and apologise.

  Why?

  She hadn’t done anything wrong tonight by sleeping with the man. He had been a Venia after all. Her guilt certainly had nothing to do with the fact she had forgotten her duty for a few brief moments. It had everything to do with the man training in front of her, pushing himself relentlessly even though she could sense his fatigue. He was hurting himself by training so hard.

  Something flashed in his hand as he brought it up, so dazzling that it hurt her eyes, and she flinched away from the light that reflected off it. Vivek was facing her when she opened her eyes again, his hard chest heaving with each breath, muscles straining beneath his pale skin. Dark red marks littered his chest and his arms from the fight earlier tonight.

  “What do you want?” he growled the words and her gaze fell away from him, and onto something that sent a chill through her blood and caused an icy lump to form in her chest.

  Her limbs trembled and her side burned. She pressed her hand to it, fingers shaking, and fear crawled up her throat as she stared at the dagger in Vivek’s grasp.

  “Why?” That word came out in a hoarse quaking whisper. She couldn’t believe that he had kept it. Why would he do such a thing?

  Vivek raised the dagger, his hazel eyes dark and deadly, and flexed his fingers around the grip. His gaze shifted from the blade to her, as cold as ice and sending a shiver through her.

  “I intend to kill Aleksis with it, and Izabella too. I will have my vengeance.”

  Sophis stared into his eyes. The steely look in them and the intense hatred she could sense in him, the fury and hunger, gave her the answer to a question that had plagued her for so long now. She knew why Vivek had changed around her. She wasn’t the only one who was haunted by that night. Vivek had been carrying around this rage inside him for a decade, waiting for his chance to have his bloody vengeance. She was too afraid to let herself believe that it might be because of her and that he wanted revenge for her sake, not his own.

  She crossed the room to him, her feet carrying her there without her noticing, and caught his wrist when he went to turn away. His gaze penetrated hers, holding it when she wanted to look away and hide as she spoke to him. The years between that night and this one and everything that had happened between them in that time made it difficult to find her voice. The knowledge that everything might have been different if she had only found the words back then cut her deep inside. If she had gone to him and told him what she was going to now, the apology she wanted to give him would have come a lot easier.

  Sophis held his wrist, her trembling fingers locked tightly around it, and fought against her rising panic and desire to leave without speaking. She had to tell him. He deserved to hear it and things were never going to change between them if she didn’t face what she had done and apologise.

  “Vivek...” Sophis stared deep into his hazel eyes and tried to hold the tremble from her voice. She sucked in a deep breath and slowly exhaled, trying to release all her tension with it. “I’m sorry... I’m so sorry about what happened that night and that my weakness was the reason you were so badly injured, that you were almost—it wasn’t how you taught me to fight. You trained me to be stronger than that and I let you down, and you risked everything for me... and I’m sorry you were hurt and... I’m sorry.”

  He stood there, his eyes locked on hers, and she fought her need to look away and hide the tears stinging her eyes from him. She was being weak again but whenever she thought about that night and what Seth had told her or saw the scar on Vivek’s back, she felt ill and wanted to cry. Vivek had been so good to her, had trained her so well, spending so much time with her and teaching her everything he knew so she would be a good soldier, and she had let him down. She had repaid his kindness by almost getting him killed.

  Vivek continued to stare at her as though he wasn’t sure what to say and Sophis had the feeling he was going to shirk her grip and leave without saying anything.

  She jumped when he dropped the dagger, curled his hand around her back, dragged her hard against his body and kissed her.

  Sophis’s eyes widened at the first brush of his lips against hers and then her eyelids fell when he slanted his mouth over hers and she found herself responding. It felt so good. So familiar. She frowned and it dawned on her. These strong arms around her and this soft but demanding mouth stealing her heart with such fierce passion were the same as those that had carried her to Heaven at the masquerade.

  It had been Vivek.

  She broke away from him, confused and her mind reeling, and touched the bite mark on her throat.

  Vivek didn’t release her and didn’t take his eyes away from hers. She searched them, trying to see if it really was him, unsure of herself as she struggled to comprehend it all. Her eyes dropped to his chest and the new cuts there, and she placed her fingertips against them, matching them against each long red line. She traced them downwards over his hard pectorals and his sharp intake of breath and the way his pupils dilated and his grip on her waist tightened told her everything she needed to know.

  She had made those marks.

  She had slept with Vivek.

  Sophis couldn’t believe it but it made a terrible kind of sense as she stared into his eyes, her mind replaying every moment that had passed between them from his claiming her as his dance partner to her fleeing from him in the maze when he had asked her to remove her mask.

  Her stomach warmed and heart clenched. She had felt instantly attracted to him and he had seemed famil
iar to her at first. Had she known on some instinctive level that it was Vivek behind the mask? She looked at him, taking in the cut of his jaw and his sensual mouth, and she couldn’t deny they were the same as the man’s, or that he was beautiful and as alluring as he had been last night.

  And she wanted him.

  “Did you know it was me?” she whispered, afraid of his answer and what it would mean.

  He nodded slowly. “I would know you anywhere, Sophis.”

  She wasn’t sure how to feel as she looked at him, torn inside between feeling relieved that she had slept with the man now holding her close to him and being angry that he had taken things that far with her without mentioning who he was, deceiving her.

  She opened her mouth to speak again but he pressed his finger to her lips, his cool touch sending them tingling.

  “I did not mean for things to happen this way. I only meant to speak with you and make you cast aside your current opinion of me... and to tell you that I never meant to hurt you. I only wanted to protect you, Sophis... I know I went about it the wrong way... and that I was cruel and made you suffer... I know that. I hate myself for it. Forgive me?”

  A darker part of her heart said not to, said to throw it back in his face and make him suffer as she had, but she couldn’t go through with it when he was looking at her so beautifully and with so much warmth and hope in his eyes.

  Her anger faded as she recalled that he had tried to talk to her several times. She was the one who had refused to listen and had goaded him into it. She had seen the desire in his eyes and had let it sweep her along. She had lured him into wanting her, and then when he had taken her out onto the balcony, probably to talk to her, she had triggered his hunger again by making him chase her. The hunt had excited both of them to the point of no return.