by Mya Black
“Come on, Dr. Baker. You can’t be serious!”
“I am serious. Sorry. But how about we get to the ultrasound?”
“Isn’t it too early for that?” She was surprised, yet again, at his knowledge.
Dr. Baker smiled. “No. We can wait until twenty two weeks, but at eighteen, we’ll get the heartbeat and see the baby.”
“Really,” his eyes widened with surprise and hope.
Dr. Baker laughed. “Yes. So,” she looked to Eve,” are you ready for this?”
Eve nodded because it wasn’t like she was going to say no. She lay on the table staring at the ceiling, while the doctor slathered her belly with blue gel. Her eyes were closed as the wand rolled over her stomach in search of her baby, already playing hide and seek. They popped open in alarm when a loud thug-thug noise sounded in the room. “Oh my…is that?”
“Yes, it’s the baby’s heartbeat. Incredible, right?”
“Fucking amazing,” Alessandro whispered, his voice awe struck. He reached for her hand and she opened it to him. “That’s our baby’s heartbeat,” he whispered. “It’s strong.”
“Do you want to know the sex?”
They stared at each other without saying a word, neither willing to voice an opinion until the other had. Finally, Alessandro spoke. “As long as the baby is healthy, I don’t care. But if you want to know for the nursery, then let’s find out.”
She smiled at him, tears trickling down her face. “Let’s be surprised then!” If Alessandro noticed her unintended slip, he said nothing. His gorgeous smile was beaming at her and all the love she’d been feeling for him but had been denying flooded her system with warmth. She did love him, but dammit, she refused to spend her life as the other woman.
***
It finally seemed as though they were falling into a routine. Eve still kept her walls up, but they’d reach a sort of détente. He wouldn’t try to force his explanations on her, and she would stop the snide remarks. She allowed him to take care of her without much fuss, and he did his best to show her how well he would take care of her and their baby. The week had been quiet since they’d heard the heartbeat, but it had also been tense.
Alessandro fell in love more and more with her and he was sure she felt the same way. If only she could trust him.
Tonight, he wouldn’t worry about that. He would have a good night with good food and lively company. His younger brother Valentino was coming for dinner and they would give them both a little bit of theoretical, if not physical space. Valentino was young and carefree, and he never met a beautiful woman he couldn’t charm. Hopefully, that would be enough for Eve to relax. If not, he’d planned a spectacular dinner that was sure to leave her feeling satisfied.
Eve shuffled slowly to the door, but he beat her to it. “Have a seat and put your feet up. Please.”
She frowned. “That is not how I greet guests to my home.”
He threw his hands up and walked back towards the kitchen. “Fine. Put our baby at risk for the sake of etiquette. Be my guest!” He said nothing more as he made his way to the kitchen to check the pots on the stove.
“Wow, you are one gorgeous piece of work!” Alessandro smiled at the sound of his brother’s voice. “If my older brother wasn’t so head over heels for you, I’d steal you right away.”
He chuckled at his brother’s antics. “You must be the more charming Scotti brother.” Valentino laughed loud, although Alessandro was sure it was for his benefit.
“Don’t forget more good looking and better in the sack.” Alessandro could see his brother with one arm slung lazily over her shoulder, smile wide and dimples on display. She laughed. She was enjoying Valentino’s company. He was glad, but he’d be lying if he said it didn’t sting.
“Come on in and I’ll get you a drink.”
He followed her in and spotted his brother. “Alessandro! How’s it going?” He leaned in and did the half hug thing they always did.
Alessandro shrugged. “Fine.” The brothers shared a brief look, but Valentino quickly turned his attention back to Eve.
“So, do you guys know what you’re having yet?”
Alessandro ignored the question, leaving it up to Eve to answer. He was still upset she was being so stubborn about the baby so he pretended to be busy in the kitchen. “No we decided we didn’t want to know.”
“Why not? How will I know what color earrings to get him or her?”
She laughed. “You have a few years before a girl will need earrings and I don’t see you with any stones in your ears, so why would you want to turn your nephew into a punk?”
He threw his head back and laughed. “A punk? What are you, eighty?” At her narrowed gaze, he doubled over with laughter. He leaned in. “So, what’s got my brother in such a funk, besides worrying over you?”
Eve at least blushed at his words. “Just that, as far as I know.”
Valentino considered the beauty before him. “You know, I thought it would be amusing as hell once Alessandro actually fell in love, now not so much.”
“Yeah, right. He’s already married, so obviously he’s been in love.”
“With Sabrina? You have to be kidding, right?” Valentino shook his head and leaned closer so Alessandro couldn’t hear. “That was no love match, Eve. He married her because she lied and said she was pregnant and shortly after the wedding she ‘miscarried.’” His air quotes didn’t go unnoticed.
“If that’s true, why didn’t he divorce her?” She wasn’t ready to believe Valentino’s words any more than she was ready to listen to Alessandro’s explanations.
Valentino shook his head in disgust. “You really haven’t talked about any of this?”
She wore a sheepish grin. “He’s already lied once, how can I believe anything he says?”
“Well, believe me, then. He refused to believe she would be so mercenary, so he stuck it out for another six months. Then, he came home early from Australia and found the next-door neighbor balls deep in his wife.” Valentino fairly spat out the words, anger radiating off him in waves. “He filed for divorce the next day. Two weeks later, Sabrina got into the accident that turned her into a rutabaga.”
She giggled and then caught herself. “A rutabaga? Why?”
“Because they’re the ugliest damn vegetables around, just like her. Sabrina came in a decent package, but inside she was dead and rotting and ugly.”
Wow. Tell me how you really feel. She wanted to believe Valentino, but he was Alessandro’s brother and therefore, likely to take his side in the matter. “So, why is he still married? I’m sure he could have gotten a divorce.”
“You would think so, right? Well, that’s because he can’t consent on her behalf as the one seeking the divorce, which means a parent or a power of attorney has to. In her case, they were one and the same. And her parents are as mercenary as she was. They refused because they’d be on the hook for her medical care.”
So Alessandro was stuck with a wife he didn’t want, and he wasn’t free to find love. That was heartbreaking. And, she’d been such an unreasonable asshole! “Oh God, I’m…just, shit!”
That made Valentino laugh. “Yeah, I can see why he likes you, Eve. You look like a goddess, swear like a sailor, and I’m guessing you screw like a porn star.”
Eve leaned over and laughed so hard tears streamed down her cheeks. “Gee, Valentino, tell me what you really think.”
“I just did.”
“I’ll bet that smile lets you get away with everything,” she shook her head in amused affection.
“With everyone but Alessandro.” He stood when the doorbell pealed. “Are we expecting company or a stripper?” He opened the door. “Please tell me you ordered her just for me!”
“You wish,” Carla said with a laugh and breezed into the house.
“Damn right, I do.”
Carla ignored him and kissed her friend. “How are you and the nugget doing?”
Alessandro watched as Eve rubbed her growing bump. “Gett
ing better every day.”
She leaned over to Eve’s stomach. “That’s because your daddy is taking such good care of you both.” Alessandro smiled and made a note to get Carla a pair of her favorite designer shoes.
“Dinner is served.”
***
“Now you know everything – you have to talk to him,” Carla pleaded with Eve while the men were out to satisfy one of Eve’s ice cream cravings.
“I feel so stupid, and God, I was such a bitch to him!” She’d been beating herself up ever since Valentino told her the truth about the marriage she used to torture Alessandro the past few months. “I was nothing short of awful to him and he took it. He took it all and still took care of me. Of us.” She rubbed her stomach with affection.
“He loves you, dummy. Of course, he put up with it.” Carla was glad the truth was finally out in the open. “So, you’re going to talk to him, right? Right?”
“I guess I don’t really have a choice.”
“You always have a choice, Eve. Either you want to be with him and you want to talk it out, or you don’t want to be with him and you need to work out custody once the baby comes.” She sat back with a smug look on her face. “The choice is yours.”
Eve stuck out her tongue. “You won’t be so smug when I shave half your head.”
“Pssh, I’ll still be sexy and then I’ll just sell multi-million dollar homes to rock stars.” She flipped her shiny black hair over her shoulder to show it off.
They both laughed for a long time before Eve sobered. “I’m so glad I have you, Carla.”
She swiped a dismissive hand in the air. “Of course, you have me, Eve, but you also have Alessandro. What else does the man need to do to prove his love?”
“It’s not him. It’s me.” I’m the broken one, she wanted to say, but couldn’t. Carla knew she felt that way, but she could never say it aloud.
Chapter Thirteen
“I’m sorry, Alessandro. For everything, all of it. For doubting you, and for being such a shit to you over the last few months.” She’d waited too long to give this apology and it was messy and stilted. She should have apologized the night of their dinner party as soon as he’d returned with a few pints of pistachio ice cream and raspberry and green apple sorbet. Instead, she waited. Perhaps too long.
There had been two more trips to Dr. Baker, two more months of Alessandro taking care of her and the baby, and two more months of falling deeper in love with the man. She was an idiot.
Alessandro’s face was stern, his mouth a straight line pulled tight. “Valentino told you.”
She nodded, her voice quiet. “He did.”
Leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees, Alessandro looked at her. His face was tight. “So, his explanation as good enough, but mine wasn’t worthy of listening to.”
It wasn’t a question and she knew he didn’t need an answer. “I didn’t ask him, he just started talking.”
“So, I should have just forced you to listen to me?”
“No, look,” she stood, “I’m just trying to apologize for my behavior, my treatment of you. Why can’t you just accept my damn apology?”
Her outburst did nothing to quell the fire starting inside him. How dare she expect that after months of torture, he would just accept her half-assed apology. “Oh, I’m sorry. Am I making this too difficult to you?”
She didn’t miss his sarcastic tone. “I said I’m sorry. What more can I say?”
How about you love me? He knew it was ridiculous to think Eve was anywhere close to saying those words. She had so many walls built up around her, it would take his best demolition crew to tear them down. “I don’t know what else you can do, Eve. But if it makes you feel better, fine apology accepted.”
“Are you kidding me? If it makes me feel better,” she mocked him. “I’m trying to make things right here and you’re being an ass.”
“Okay.” There was no point arguing with her, he knew. She was pregnant and irrational and still struggling with her feelings for him. “It takes one to know one.” Just because there was no point to it, didn’t mean Eve didn’t deserve a little payback. He could see her seething, but he went on, “I’ve been here for months trying to prove how much you mean to me. Taking care of you and the baby and waiting all damn day and night for you to listen to me explain about my life. You refused.” His fingers tunneled roughly through his hair. “My brother spills everything in one five minute chat and all is forgiven. Months later.”
Yeah, she deserved that. She had known for a little over two months what the real story was about his marriage and still, she said nothing. Finally, she offered up an apology and expected him to just accept it. It was unreasonable. She was still being an ass. “You’re right.”
“I know.”
She looked at him with his arms crossed so defensively and her heart sank. It was over. She’d waited too long. “So, what do we do about it?”
Alessandro moved to sit on the coffee table so they were facing one another. “I guess that depends. Tell me, Eve. Are you sorry because I’ve been taking care of you or because you care about me and you know your actions hurt me?”
“Alessandro, you know I care about you. I wouldn’t have been so hurt if I didn’t care.”
He smiled. “That wasn’t my question, love.”
She glared and tried to bite back a smile. “I’m sorry for all of it. I’m sorry that I’ve been a shit and you’ve taken care of us and that I hurt you. Because I care about you.” She mumbled the last part and she wasn’t ashamed.
“So, is this apology a way for us to move forward or because you were wrong and needed to assuage your guilt?”
She swallowed because this wasn’t the conversation she wanted to have. Not right now. "Is there a way forward for us, Alessandro? I mean, I am sorry for not listening, but you should have told me you were married and you didn’t.”
His gaze raked over her body. “And you would have given me a chance if you knew?”
Her shoulders sagged.
“Yeah, I thought so.”
Alessandro grabbed both of her hands in his, brought them to his lips and closed his eyes. He savored even this small taste of her. He released a long breath and looked deep into her gold flecked eyes. “I love you Eve, and I think we have a real shot at being a family. Me. You. The baby. But we both know it’s up to you.”
A lone tear slid down her cheek. “How can we be a family, Alessandro, while you’re already married? What if Sabrina wakes up and doesn’t remember that you were in the middle of a divorce? What if she stays in that coma for the next hundred years? Are the baby and I just supposed to wait until you’re free?”
He groaned his frustration. “No! Don’t you see? Now, I can petition the courts for a divorce without the approval of her parents. Between the divorce petition and being in a serious relationship with a child on the way, it’ll be next to impossible to deny me this.”
She looked at him thoughtfully, the emotion shining in his eyes. He had thought it all through, which meant he was serious about a relationship with her. Didn’t it? “Are you sure you want this, Alessandro? I mean, me and a baby, that’s a lot of commitment.”
“Sweetheart, the problem was never about commitment. It was about committing to the wrong woman. You, Eve, are definitely the right woman.”
“You mean that, Alessandro?”
“Goodness, woman, are you blind? You think I put up with your obnoxious behavior because you’re fun to be around? Hell no! I did it because I love you and I knew you loved me, too. I just need to stick around long enough for you to realize it.”
His wink knocked her off kilter and her breath stumbled out of her body. God she wanted this man more than had ever wanted anything in her life – more than the scholarships that got her through college, more than the loan that helped her launch her first salon. At this moment, she wanted him more than she wanted the next breath. “Alessandro, I-I,” she stopped to consider he words and a telltale bu
zz began in his pocket.
He looked at her apologetically. “I’m sorry, I should get this.”
She watched him stand and listen to the voice on the other end of the line. His brows twisted in confusion and anger. “Deal with it, then. You wanted it this way, so you fucking deal with it!” He was breathing fire when he turned to face her.
“Problem?”
He shook his head, debating on whether or not to tell her about the call. If he didn’t tell her it would cause further problems, but if he told her before she admitted her feelings, well, he didn’t want to think about that. “That was Sabrina’s parents.”
Shit.
***
“I love you, too, Alessandro, but I don’t know if I can allow myself to love you.” He listened as she told him that she felt more for him than she had for any man in her life. He felt ten feet tall when she told him he felt like home to her. It was the best compliment she could have given, yet all he could focus on was that she couldn’t allow herself to love him.
“Why can’t you,” he’d asked with desperation in his voice. He needed to know what was holding her back. He suspected it was about more than his inconvenient wife.
“Because I’ll never be your first priority. The baby will never be your first priority. Whenever there’s a problem, you’ll be on the first plane to Seattle to sort it all out. For me, that would be half a life, and I can’t live like that. I’m sorry. As much as I love you and want a future with you, I just can’t.”
Then, she leaned in and kissed him until all he could see, hear, and taste was her. She was the only thing that existed for him in this world. Her lips were the only thing tethering him to the earth. The kiss was sexy and bittersweet, painful and full of longing. Longing for a future they would never have all because Sabrina’s parents were greedy fucks who got off on screwing with his life. He kissed her and kissed her until they were both breathless and panting. He wanted her.
He had to have her.