Phantom Heartstrings

by Felicia Lynn

  I reach over her shoulder leaving her pressed against me and take her case into my hand. I lean down kissing her forehead, “Let’s go,” I tell her grabbing my own case on the way out. “One more stop before scooping the kids,” I say, taking her hand in my own.

  “Wait... What? That’s it? You aren’t going to take me home and finish what you just started?” she asks as I pull her along, almost dragging her because of her resistance and showing her annoyance that our little incident ended too quickly.

  “Nope. One more stop then we get the kids,” I repeat again. Her little fit only fueling my determination.

  We’re in the car headed to the next stop in Phase II and she’s still full of herself over not getting her way, but I just sit back laughing on the inside but promising myself that tonight she’ll get properly fucked, so she’ll remember that the next time she questions my manhood. Tit for Tat.

  I turn on the radio a little louder and open the sunroof and windows as we drive down I-275. I place my hand on her thigh and she doesn’t object but there’s no response. I casually move my hand a little higher. I feel her muscles tense but she’s playing hard to get and attempting to act as if she doesn’t care. Good. I love cat and mouse. I move closer again and watch out of the corner of my eye, careful not to take my attention off the road. She quickly glances at me and then focuses straight ahead back on the road, ignoring me again.

  I get off at the next exit toward our destination and hear a little huff from her corner knowing she was hopeful I’d change my mind, but getting off at a different exit than the one that leads us home, reality hit her. I’m not giving in, but I’m not cruel. I won’t leave her wanting all day. What would that say about my masculinity?

  I make the right turn at the light and another quick right into our destination. The parking lot is mostly empty here as well and I easily find a spot in a secluded area of the lot under a tree. I remove my hand from her, closing the windows and sunroof and not turning off the ignition. It’s late September in Florida and still very hot outside but I’m about to make in pretty hot in here too.

  I remove my seat belt turning to her and clicking hers off as well. She turns to look at me with a questioning, yet hopeful stare. “I’m not fucking you in the car, babe.” I remove the expectation quickly. “But I am going to take care of you real quick so that you can focus and don’t get hurt on the next adventure,” I tell her, sliding my hand up her thigh, again finding the denim warm to the touch. She is more hot and bothered than I expected.

  Thankful that she chose these short little shorts, making it easy for my fingers to slide right into the inside of her leg. My fingers glide across the wet flesh easily. She braces herself with one arm on the armrest and the other on the door gripping with no sound leaving her mouth. “Breathe, babe.” I order, using the unused hand to slide her legs open wider.

  When my fingers slide into her, she falls deeper into the seat, unable to keep her body engaged. Little moans escape her lips. “Drake, Oh. My. God. Please, let’s go home,” She begs. But I ignore her requests, setting my pace and unbuttoning the top button of her shorts, feeling extremely grateful for the need for tinted windows in the Florida sun.

  As I use my right hand, allowing my fingers to dive in assaulting her inside, I move my left hand into the top of her shorts to find the nub that will send her soaring, as I watch her body begin its slow build up, and tell her in my own strained, husky voice, “Tonight I will fuck you till daylight, but this will have to do for right now. Give it to me,” I finish.

  She reaches over grabbing my cock through my pants. It’s harder than granite. I want to remove her hand knowing I won’t find my own release until much later but my hands are a bit busy. I’m so damn turned on right now watching her quiver and moan softly into her release.

  So. Fucking. Hot. I might need more than one date night if they all include this action. She looks over to me with sedated, hooded eyes. “Wow. Thank you for that,” She says, before looking down at my own little problem as I slide my dripping wet fingers from her body.

  She turns toward me, gabbing my dick while watching me put the fingers with her juices into my mouth, sucking them before turning them to rub on her lips. “You want to taste?” I ask, the energy heavy, with sexual tensions running high. I’m a little shocked when she parts her lips allowing my fingers into her mouth. She sucks them as I gently tug them out, allowing her to use that powerful tongue muscle to do dirty things to my fingers, feeling the sensation all the way to my cock as she fumbles with the button and zipper on my pants.

  Holy shit, this is getting out of hand. I pull my fingers out of her mouth and push her hand from the button, shaking my head no, while my brain and cock simultaneously object. “Whoa, Babe. No.” I tell her abruptly seeing her expression fall from my rejection. Shit “Well, not, no, exactly. Just not right now. Believe me, I want what you’re offering.” I try to explain, without her feeling the rejection.

  I hold her face with my thumb trying to get contact with her eyes. “We have a lot of ‘private time’ to make up for, Cams, and I’m going to do many things to your body tonight but right now, this minute, I need you to get out of the car and walk through that building with me, without that freshly fucked look on your face.” I look her up and down realizing that walking into this building with my raging hard on and my wife looking all hot and bothered is going to be a sight. But, this has to be done.

  Getting out of the car with a huge grin, “You asked for it, Mr. Adams,” She says smartly as she walks around the back of the car to meet me. I adjust my cock as best I can, taking her hand to the building.

  Chapter 19

  Cami

  We walk hand in hand through the arcade. I can’t imagine what’s so important here that he’d pass up time in bed for but whatever, at least I’m better. Poor Drake, he’s struggling. It’s written all over his face and the bulge in his pants.

  When we exit the backdoor of the arcade and are walking toward the track, I know exactly what he’s doing. Damn. Go-carts. What the hell? “Um… why are we here? Why is this more important than what we WERE doing?” Annoyance clearly shining through my question.

  He hands the attendant his tickets, clearly purchased in advance. Stupid planning of grand gestures. “Getting back on track. The same track. I might even let you lead and take the win.” He smirks. “Although in my present state, I may not have to just let you win. Being scrunched up in that little seat, with my legs hiked up and a ranging hard on is not going to be easy, thanks to you.”

  The attendant escorts us to the front two carts. We’re the only ones here thankfully, since all the kids are in school. I sit in my cart easily, and watch him maneuver to find comfort with a huge sneaky grin. “You ready?” he asks over the loud rumblings of the cart motors.

  I nod, “Don’t let me win. I only want to win fair and square. If you’re the leader, I’ll follow you.”

  He smiles at my words, “Ditto, Babe. I’d follow you to ends of the earth.”

  The green light flashes and we’re off, racing around the track, wind in my face. As stupid as I thought this was moments ago, I love it. I haven’t been in a go-cart in years, at least since I was a teenager.

  The laughter as we race around each other back and forth with each of us taking the lead at different times, and being just as comfortable leading as following. I find myself looking over my shoulder to make sure he’s right behind me when I’m in front of him, but he’s always right there. His eyes never leave my path and vice versa.

  I get it. I get what he’s doing. It didn’t take explaining to understand. It was the physical act of doing it. Even though he’s using the go-carts as a physical metaphor, I know it doesn’t matter who’s leading or following, the other will be right there.

  We round the track multiple times for a while without ever stopping. When he’s finally had enough, he pulls through the gates. I follow knowing that right now he is leading us. He’s leading us back to a place we’ve
strayed from for so long. He’s leading us back to each other as much emotionally as physically. God, I love this man.

  He takes off the seat belt and jumps out to help me with my own. As soon as the restraints are free he pulls me up into his arms. “How was that?” he asks, kissing my cheek.

  “Fun. New. Informative. You lead, I’ll follow.” I smile back at him. “For now, anyways.”

  His laughter in my ear travels directly to my heart healing it a little more with each of his grand gestures. Then with my hand in his own, he leads us to the car just in time to go pick up our munchkins.

  As we’re sitting in the pick-up line a good bit early, to get the kids, Drake is checking his emails on his phone and I’m happily lying back in the seat just relaxing.

  I can’t help but think about how far we’ve come in just a few days with really open conversations. Fighting with Drake has always been a huge fear. I never wanted to be ‘that couple’ that was constantly arguing. Sweeping things under the rug and being non-confrontational was a tool that I believed was in all of our best interests.

  But I’ve learned differently, the blowup fight although painful, may very well have been our saving grace. Without that fight, we wouldn’t be sitting here. We’d be dancing around each other trying to avoid the obvious. Pretending that all is well to the outside world, while inside we’re crumbling.

  I’m sad I lost the baby. It leaves a pain I don’t think I’ll ever truly escape, but I can’t help but wonder what the status of our relationship would be without that hardship. Would we ever have talked? Would I ever have admitted that living up to the perfection that others have grown to expect from us, is slowly killing me? I’m really not sure we would have. So in an odd way, I feel like the little angel unknowingly left behind a gift that is so much bigger than we may ever be able to realize.

  The thought brings tears to my eyes instantly. I’m wavering on an edge of happiness and sadness that I don’t understand. I wipe the tear that escapes not noticing that he’s watching me. His face falls with concern and I’m not sure I can explain my feelings to him, without making him think I’m dismissing the loss of our baby.

  He runs his finger across my cheek catching the next tear. “Cams, what’s going on in your head, love?” His sweetness only fueling the growing ache.

  “I don’t know how to tell you.” Doing my best to swallow the emotions.

  “One word, then the next. Just tell me. I’m right here, ready to help.” His hand not leaving my cheek.

  “Everything happens for a reason. Our baby died before we could meet him so that we could be okay. It was his gift,” I whisper.

  When his own eyes glass over meeting mine, I know he sees it. I know he understands and I’m grateful. “Cams, we’re going to be okay. My heart is healing and yours will too.”

  “I know. It’s working. Just…Thank you,” I tell him before wiping the last escaped tear, and even with a heavy heart, happiness is occurring. Life IS going on. And Drake is giving me the strength I didn’t know I needed.

  Chapter 20

  Drake

  The kids are an incredible emotional distraction. They’re loud as they tell us about their day on the ride home. I look in the rearview mirror at them proudly as we’re stopped at a red light. Life happens at a high speed pace and if you don’t stop to watch, you can miss some amazing things that happen.

  I fear I’ve missed some big things over the years. Luckily for me, there are so many more things to come and my eyes are wide fucking open. I’m not going to let that happen again.

  We’re almost home and I’m excited about them all seeing what’s in store for us. I’m excited that tonight a new memory will be made as a family. The part of Phase II that was just for Cami has worked like a charm. The second part of Phase II is for us all.

  The driveway is empty and the house is dark. Good sign. No one’s here. When I made my arrangements the most important part was timing it correctly.

  “I didn’t make arrangements for dinner this morning. I have no idea what we’re eating. Don’t expect too much,” she says when we all jump out of the car and everyone is racing in the door.

  “No problem, babe. We’ll figure something out,” I tell her, knowing her little problem will soon be fixed.

  The kids are thirty steps ahead of us and are screaming and asking questions before we even make it through the door. We both walk faster wanting to see what they are seeing.

  Through the windows in our backyard are huge pillows with more pillows tossed on top making an outdoor bed. The white lights and lanterns strung from the trees. There are candles all around and the gas fire pit is lit with all the makings for s’mores close by. A screen the size of a marquee is lit up with the words, “Welcome to your outdoor movie party, Adams Family”

  Cami can’t take her eyes off of it, even as the kids are pulling on her screeching with excitement. “This is so cool,” “Can we go outside?” “Mommy look at the lights.” “I want to make s’mores” “What movie are we watching?” The kids say loudly amongst themselves. She’s shocked into muteness, not answering any of the questions. Surprised again.

  When she finally drags her eyes from the backyard to children then to me, I can see from her expression how much this means and she’s not alone. I know how special this night will be to the kids and us as well.

  For once, thankful for daylights savings time, it’s dusk and will soon be dark enough to enjoy the movie. With my eyes meeting hers, I shrug. Reaching to the huge buckets of popcorn sitting on our kitchen table, I stuff my mouth with a handful, earning me a little laugh packaged nicely with her huge smile. “Pizza is in the oven,” I tell her, hopeful it actually is but since everything else has been completed perfectly, as I requested, I expect this will too.

  She walks over to me wrapping her arms around me, looking up at me, “You are incredible, Mr. Adams. What am I going to do with you?”

  I respond, returning her embrace, “I can think of many, many things but most importantly, just love me.”

  Our moment is immediately interrupted when the children begin berating us with questions again and Cami goes into mommy mode, getting everyone’s attention as she goes into the kitchen to make plates for our little army telling the kids, “Daddy has thought of everything. Isn’t this so cool? What movie do you think we’re watching?” and engaging the children.

  I watch her take care of the children, in awe at how easily she makes it look. She seamlessly goes from child to child giving them each her undivided attention and affection. My kids have no idea how lucky they are but I’ll make it my job to keep reminding them.

  When dinner is finished and Cami is helping them get thier PJs on just in case they fall asleep, as they sometimes do in late movies, I take a minute to return a long overdue call. I walk outside hoping for a little privacy and hit send on my phone.

  She picks up on the first ring. “Hey. I’ve been waiting to hear! How does it look?”

  “Whit, this is incredible. Thank you for arranging everything. The event planning company did everything perfectly.”

  “How’s our girl?” she asks, concerned, knowing now that Cami finally disclosed all the details to her and I can speak freely without betraying her.

  “She’s doing better, but I think it’s just going to be one of those things that always lingers, you know?” Understanding, because I too think there will always be that missing piece.

  “Yeah, I know. I just love her. I hate to see her hurting. How else can I help? Anything else you need from me?” she’s organized everything for tonight and tomorrow from home through her contacts. I’ll never be able to thank her enough. I’d never have been able to pull this off. I wouldn’t have known where to even start.

  “We’re great, Whit! Thanks again. Everything’s good and on track for tomorrow?” I ask, hopeful.

  “Yep. All is a go. Check your email. You’ll find the timing details there,” she says, pausing, “Drake, thanks for calling me and letti
ng me help. You’ll never know how much it means to be able to do something for her.” But little does she know, I do understand. Cami is selfless and jumps to help others, it’s rare that an opportunity to return the favor presents itself.

  “Thanks Whit. Get some rest. I’ll get in trouble if you aren’t taking care of yourself because you had to rescue me.” I finish as we both laugh, saying goodbye and disconnecting just in time for the intruders to arrive.

  Chapter 21

  Cami

  I’ve never seen my children more excited, and we’ve been to Disney World. If you watched their reactions not knowing what’s in our backyard, you’d expect Mickey & Friends with every Marvel comic hero out here. I walk into the backyard seeing the kids dancing around happy, and Drake right along with them. Moments like this are rare.

  “So daddy, what are we watching tonight?” I ask to the group, knowing he’s probably chosen a kid favorite. I have brought the big tubs of popcorn out, distributing one to the boys who are sitting on one of the jumbo pillows and taking the other to where Drake and Aubri are sitting, with room for me on the other side of Aubri. I laugh quietly to Drake, knowing he’s thinking the same thing, right in the middle of all the action.

  “I was thinking Big Hero 6,” He says to the group and I know it’s a definite favorite amongst the house and will be met with agreements.

  He presses a button on a little remote and the movie comes to life on the screen. He reaches around the back of our littlest one between us and rubs his hand firmly along the back of my head and shoulders massaging me.

  Everyone is engrossed in the movie even though they’ve seen it a million times. Somehow seeing it in our outdoor movie theater, has made it feel like we’re watching it for the first time. I have no clue what it took to put all this together, but he’s thought of every single detail and spared no expense on the little extras. I silently plan to show him my appreciation when we’re alone, later tonight.