A softness seeps into her eyes, and I’m once again blown away by her beauty. With the morning sun shining down on her, she looks like an angel. Shit, with her potty mouth and wicked ways, she can be a fallen angel.
I send her a wink that has her cheeks flushing and get my ass to work. I’ve wasted enough time this morning.
I pull into the parking lot of Rebels Advocate at the same time as Jace. We each park our trucks and jump down. I reach across to grab my protein shake and throw it back as I make my way to the doors. “What’s up?” he says with a nod of his head as I hold the door open for us.
“No much,” I grin. “What’s going on? You don’t usually get here this early.”
“Thought I’d get a workout in before my group classes.”
“What are you working on? I was thinking of getting in the ring. You in?"
His eyes practically bug out of his head. "Yeah," he says coolly, though I see the excitement deep within his eyes. Jace and I used to face off together all the time in the ring. It was our most basic form of exercise. But since returning from Iraq, I've barely looked at the ring and I know it's been weighing on Jace. He’s been itching for this moment.
I've been neglecting our friendship over the past few months and I know it hurts him, but he's too curious. I see it in his eyes every time I see him. He wants to know every single torturous detail of my time in Iraq, and I know that when it finally comes out, he's going to be crushed. It’s going to kill him. I’ve been trying to spare him from that but he pushes and pushes. Eventually, I’ll have to tell him, and I’m not looking forward to it.
Things have changed between us, and quite honestly, I miss my best friend. We used to have a wicked bromance. Hell, if you looked up the definition of bromance, you'll see nothing but a picture of me and Jace.
I want that back. I'm the one who’s been holding back. All I would have to do is reach out and grab it.
I finish off my protein shake as we walk through the door and I head into my office. The sound of Caden yelling out orders to his client echo through the club and has me looking around wondering why the hell I can’t hear Cole and Xander training.
Looking around, I find them using the treadmills. Xander is sprinting like his ass is on fire and Cole is busily putting the speed up higher and higher, with a grin plastered on his face.
I chuckle to myself as I duck into my office and empty my pockets out onto the desk. Xander hates using the treadmills. He's more of an outdoor runner and Cole knows it. He only makes him use them as a form of punishment, which usually means Xander has mouthed off during their session.
I meet Jace in the ring and he’s bouncing on his toes, excited to get started. “Where have you been all my life?” he says with a grin.
Rolling my eyes, I shake my head at him. I fucking love Jace. He always knows exactly what to say. “You’re such a fucking idiot,” I laugh.
With that, we get straight into our workout. We work our asses off and it feels good to be here again. I feel like I’m finally coming back to myself, and I have Lex to thank for that. Not that I’ll be admitting that to her anytime soon.
I get Jace in a headlock with him bent over at the waist when the prick shoves his foot out, making us both topple to the ground. I land with a hard thump on top of Jace and like the idiot he is, he can’t stop cackling to himself.
I hear more laughter from across the club and look up to find Cole, Caden, and Xander watching us fuck around. Though I don’t miss the look in each of their eyes that suggests just how damn happy they are to see me here. I’m about to tell them all to shove their heads up their asses, when I decide to let them have their little moment and continue on being a bunch of emotional pussies.
I turn back to Jace as he gets himself into a sitting position and rests his elbows on his knees while trying to catch his breath. He looks at me with a sober expression, and just like that, I know shit’s about to get real. “You look good,” he says with a slight nod of his head. Now, I could be wrong, but something tells me he’s not talking about my rock-hard body.
My eyes cut back across to the boys who have suddenly found something more important to do. “I feel good,” I tell him.
“Yeah?” he questions with hope in his eyes. “Did something happen? Did you talk to someone?”
“Yeah, actually,” I say with a shrug, a slight grin starting to spread across my lips as I recall the conversation I had with Lex. And obviously, the events that unfolded afterward. As you know, I can’t think about Lex without my mind taking me there. It’s just not possible. “I did talk to someone.”
A slight jealously crosses his face before he does his best to mask it, and I feel like a prick. Jace has always been my go-to guy, but he just won’t understand this. “So… like a therapist?” he questions.
I shake my head. “You remember Lex, right? My neighbor.”
“Yeah,” he says slowly.
“I told her about it,” I tell him. “I don’t know, it just kind of came out yesterday, but it made me feel better. It’s like I’m not holding onto this awful thing anymore.”
He nods his head before looking back up at me. “I’m glad you’re feeling more like yourself, but you know I’m here, right?” he questions before pointing out the guys. “Out of all these fuckers, I’d be the one to understand. I mean, I was right there with you for the first three tours. I’ve seen this shit.”
“With all due respect, Jace, you don’t get it. You wouldn’t,” I tell him, hating myself for what I’m about to say. “The shit we saw was nothing compared to what I went through. It was fucking child’s play in comparison.”
His eyes go hard before he pushes himself to his feet. “Right. I got it.”
With that, he jumps down from the ring and disappears.
Shit. Why can’t he see that I’m trying to protect him from the ugliness of it all? He did his time as a soldier and has moved on. He’s already seen things that no one his age should have to, and I’m not about to be the reason for him to lose faith in humanity. Just because I have, doesn’t mean he should have to as well.
Usually, when he’s pissed off, he’d find a punching bag to lay into. But after our workout, he’s probably sulking in his office or has disappeared altogether. Who the fuck knows?
He’ll come around soon enough, after all, he has a group session starting in an hour.
With a sigh, I climb out of the ring and jump to the ground. I grab my drink and squirt some water into my mouth as I head back to my office. Passing by Jace’s door, I see him lounged back in his desk chair, hands behind his head, looking like the world is against him.
I can’t help but stop in his doorway. I don’t wait for him to acknowledge me. He knows I’m here. “I’m sorry,” I sigh. “You know I’d tell you if I could. It’s not like it’s easy to talk about. The things they did…”
“Fuck, man,” he curses in anger. “All I want to do is help you. I know you’ve been to hell and back. That part is clear. I know it wasn’t easy, and I’m sure it was the worst thing any human being could have possibly endured. But I’m your best friend and have been for the last twenty years, so when I tell you I’m here, I fucking mean it.”
“Jace,” I sigh.
He flies to his feet cutting me off. “You know, I just don’t get it. A week ago, you told me you couldn’t stand that girl. You said she was fucking irritating and impossible. Yet somehow, you can go and tell her all about it, while I get ‘you wouldn’t understand’.”
He walks around his desk, reaches for the door, and stands before me. “Well, fuck you, too, dickhead,” he says. “I fucking get it. Any weaker man wouldn’t have survived what you went through, but did you stop to think that we were going through our own hell? I thought you were fucking dead, Luke. Every day I was waiting to hear that your body had been recovered. Then you show up four months later acting like nothing happened,” he says. “I can’t just forget about that shit.”
“Come on, man,” I say.
<
br /> He shakes his head in disbelief before yanking on the door and slamming it in my face.
Shit. I deserved that.
I’ve been such a bad friend to him. He’s right. Not once did I consider what the people at home were going through. I’ve been a self-centered ass. He needs his closure. He needs to know the extent of what happened so he can finally put it behind him.
The only problem is that my mind is still screaming at me not to tell him.
I let out a breath and step away from his door.
My fucking great day has just gone to shit.
Pushing my way into my office, I collapse down into my chair, feeling like an absolute prick. I sit there for a while before deciding I should probably get a bit of work done.
I flick through some emails and spend a bit of time looking at the final plans for the new club. The new Rebels Advocate. It’s going to be incredible. Though, as exciting as it is, this club is my home. The plans are awesome and show exactly where every last thing is going to go.
The new Rebels is going to be huge, probably three times the size of this one. But it’s closer to the city and has everything in its favor. There’s no doubt in my mind that this new club is going to be a major success. The second we have it up and running, I’m sure it will open the doors for a third and fourth Rebels Advocate.
I can’t fucking wait.
As I busily go over every tiny detail, my phone vibrates against my desk beside me. I glance down at the screen and see a name appear on my phone that instantly puts me on edge. Sharpy. The best damn sniper the military has ever seen. He’s a sharpshooter and those skills got me out of a shitload of trouble.
I unlock my phone as the sinking feeling settles in my stomach.
Sharpy – Hey man, just checking in. How are you holding up? Have you talked to Ben recently? Apparently, he’s not doing so great. Doc says its PTSD. He could really use a visit from you.
The sinking feeling stops and is replaced with absolute agony. I should have been checking on him.
Luke – Shit. I’ll head up there this weekend.
Chapter 15
Lexi
Holy crap, Batman. It’s hot.
I don’t know what the hell has been going on lately, but the weather has been ridiculous. It’s like some kind of heat wave has come through to kill us all. Maybe it gets a kick out of watching us poor earthlings fanning ourselves with our hands and making that sticky noise when we try to unstick ourselves from leather couches.
I’ve just started ripping out the bathroom, and it’s the most exhausting thing I’ve ever done. It’s too hot for this shit, but I’m far too determined to give up.
After working my ass off trying to dislodge the old cracked bathtub, I manage to get it over to the door. I twist and turn as I try to get it out of the bathroom, but the fucker is well and truly stuck in the door. “Come on, you big bastard,” I groan at the stupid thing.
I give it a big old kick, but all that does is wedge it between the doorframe. Shit. How the hell am I going to get it out of here?
I glance around the bathroom, realizing that since the doorway is now blocked, I’m also well and truly stuck. I mean, fuck the bathtub, how am I going to get out of here?
There’s a tiny window that’s high up on the wall. I could possibly get my head through and then fall to my death on the other side, or I can try to wedge myself underneath the bath and risk being crushed by the stupid thing.
Options. Options.
I go with the crushing.
With a huff, I get down on my hands and knees and work out how the hell I’m going to get under this thing. Dread fills me, but I have no other choice but to stick my head through and try to worm the rest of my body through the small gap.
I keep my eyes locked on the door, knowing a particular neighbor likes to barge his way through. I can only imagine what he would say about this. For the first time in two days, I’m pleased about this ridiculous heat wave as it has a layer of sweat covering my body, making it that little bit easier to slide myself through.
I manage to get through mostly unscathed, but end up with grazed elbows and knees. I get myself to my feet and walk down to the kitchen where I keep my first aid kit.
As I’m cleaning up my knees I realize something is off. I look around the room and can’t quite work it out until I look up. The ceiling fans are off. No wonder I’ve been feeling so damn hot.
I could have sworn I flicked them on. In fact, they’ve been on for the past two days. I swear, if they’re broken, I might just die.
I walk over to the switch and give it a quick flick with my eyes focused intently on the fans. They instantly start rotating, but the second they gain a little speed, a white powder starts flying across the room.
“What the fuck?” I shriek as I duck for cover.
I flick the fans straight off, but the damage has been done. There’s flour covering the living room and kitchen from top to bottom. My teeth clench down and my hands ball into fists. I mean, the place looks like a flour bomb exploded in here.
There’s not one single doubt in my mind how it happened, and if I thought the bastard was home, I’d be over there right now, beating his door down and giving him a piece of my mind.
I know this is payback for what we did to his house, but this is taking it a little too far.
I thought things had changed between us. We had that intense moment together a few days ago. He told me about his scars and opened himself up to me. We connected on this crazy level, and I felt things I’ve never felt before.
The following morning, he returned my speakers, and I felt as though it was some kind of truce. Since then, I’ve been the perfect neighbor. I guess I was wrong.
I really should have taken it a little further when we were boobytrapping his home. At least that would have made me feel better about the mess I’m going to have to clean up. I mean, it’s not like I can storm over there and throw him over my shoulder, demanding he clean it up.
Damn him.
I can just imagine the grin on his face if he were to see this. Not only is my home a mess, but I am too. The sweat covering my body makes the flour stick to me like glue. I swear, I look like a ghost right now. Not to mention, I just ripped out the bathroom, so I can’t even get myself cleaned up.
Unless…
I grab a clean set of clothes and walk straight out the door. I don’t bother locking up. I mean, if someone walked into that disaster, they wouldn’t want to stay long.
I head over to Luke’s house. His truck isn’t here, so I’m assuming he’s not home. Well, I’m hoping he’s not here. But then, it wouldn’t be the end of the world if he was here. I could really give him a piece of my mind right about now. And if he were to feel so inclined, I could really go for round two between the sheets.
I try his door and naturally, the bastard has it locked up like Fort Knox. I walk around the side of the house to his living room window and I get to work giving it a good old wiggle. I can’t believe my luck when it actually slides open. “Holy shit,” I grunt to myself before resisting the urge to pat myself on the back.
Hoisting myself up through the window, I grin at the flour handprints left behind on the windowsill. Not even bothering to wipe them off, I head down his hallway and into the bathroom, leaving a trail of footprints behind.
I strip out of my flour covered clothes, and get straight into a cool shower. I mean, this is his mess, so it’s only fair that I use his bathroom, right? I wash my hair and stay in here until my skin starts to wrinkle before I hop out and wrap his towel around me.
I get myself dried up and dressed before heading into his kitchen and making myself at home. I don’t doubt he’s watching me on his little security camera that comes up on his phone. Rifling through his fridge, I make myself a sandwich, leaving behind as many crumbs as possible, before getting my ass back home.
I find the broom and sweep a path from the front door to the hallway, then get a little creative and make paths
off that path to all the rooms so I can get around without making a mess.
With my bathroom in a bit of a sticky situation, I decide to call it a day as there’s really nothing I can do about it until I can get someone to help me with the floating bathtub in the doorway.
With the rest of the day to waste, I decide there’s no better time to sit with my drip than now. I get myself all hooked up in the living room and start fiddling on my phone while I wait.
As usual, the quiet moment has my mind wandering to Luke. I can’t help but think back to the moment in my guest bedroom where he blew my mind. I haven’t spoken to him since then. I’ve seen him walking in and out of his place, he winked at me and set my underwear on fire, and of course, he’s still comfortable making his way in here, but why hasn’t he actually spoken to me?
I have this incredible need to be with him again, and the fact that I haven’t been able to touch him is driving me insane. Just once is never enough with a man like him.
I never expected to feel this way about the asshole who boils my blood. Well, I guess calling him an asshole is a bit much. That’s not who he is. He’s so much more than that. He’s actually… pretty incredible.
As I’m playing on my phone, I press down on the hold button and chat away with Siri. “Siri,” I ask. “How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?”
She responds instantly. “As many cookies as Cookie Monster could muster if Cookie Monster could master cooking cookies.”
I chuckle to myself before letting out a sigh. “Siri?” I ask again, getting serious. “When’s Luke going to come around?”
“Texting Luke,” Siri replies. “When’s Luke going to come around?”
Wait… What?
My eyes widen as I look down at the phone to see a text message open to Luke, in the middle of sending. “No, no, no, no. Shit,” I yell before I desperately try to backtrack. But once the text has been sent, there’s not a lot I can do about it.
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