Forms Of Contact
There are two forms of contact, direct contact and indirect contact. The person you desire will be observing whether your direct or indirect contact will increase their attraction level towards you. The six attributes will determine how they view and feel about you.
Direct Contact is when you approach the person you desire by making contact. They include face to face, voice call, video call, messaging, email or letter.
Indirect Contact is when the person you desire is observing you without making contact or sometimes without you being aware. These include watching you at the same place of location or social media stalking.
The Attributes In Depth
Unpredictable – your actions should be unique so that the person you desire feels a sense of difference compared to others who have approached them.
→ Direct Contact – your direct contact should be unpredictable based on how you view the person you desire. If they are the type of person who feels powerful, in control and comfortable, then you should change your approach and surprise them with unpredictability. Use the change and surprise strategy.
→ Indirect Contact – your presence in the same place or location should surprise them with changes that you have made. Your social media should also be unpredictable and varying. It should be about who you are as person, your attractive value.
Challenging – you are challenging by demonstrating a sense of control, leaving the person you desire feeling emotionally provoked.
→ Direct Contact – your contact should be challenging by having control of your emotions, thoughts and body language. If your emotions, thoughts or your body language reveals how you feel so easily, you will not be a challenge to figure out. Without curiosity, there is little thought which means less likelihood of attraction developing towards you. If you are not a challenging person, you may easily hand over power, control and comfort which may reduce your attractive value.
→ Indirect Contact – if you will be at the same location, by chance or on purpose, your body language should be a challenge to read. Your social media presence should not reveal your feelings or state of mind towards them. Make sure that you have a happy and healthy lifestyle image on display so that when they stalk you, they see you as attractively challenging because your happiness is not dependent on them.
Exciting – your direct or indirect presence should make them feel the flames of joy, energy and purpose burning within you.
→ Direct Contact – your approach should showcase that you have a healthy lifestyle with purpose and fulfilment. Your tone of voice, dress sense, your body language and how you express yourself should demonstrate a sense of excitement for life. An exciting person will have a higher attraction value than someone who is not.
→ Indirect Contact – your presence in a particular place or social media should showcase your excitement for life.
Elegant – your direct or indirect presence should be commanding, graceful and classy in their eyes.
→ Direct Contact – your approach should be elegant when you pull them in and when you pull away. You do so in a respectful, mature and dignified way. The opposite of elegance is being rude, dismissive or disrespectful in the way you pull them in and the way you pull away. Being disrespectful reduces your attraction level.
→ Indirect Contact – your approach should be elegant in the way you interact with others, because the one you desire will be observing to see if you have a cheap or crass attitude.
Powerful - your direct and indirect approach should demand attention with your confident aura, wherever you go, whatever you do and whenever you speak. It should leave them humbled.
→ Direct Contact – your approach should demonstrate confidence by approaching them with bravery in how you empress yourself in your voice or body language. The opposite of powerful is fearful, doubtful, submissiveness and neediness. Confidence is your ability to control negative emotions or thoughts and being brave despite the challenge.
→ Indirect Contact – your approach should showcase your confidence wherever you are and wherever you go. This includes all places you grace with your presence, including social media.
Enticing – your direct and indirect approach presents a complete package of yourself to persuade them to pursue a romantic relationship with you.
→ Direct Contact – your approach should deliver your complete package; it should include the other five attributes. The more you present to the person you desire, the more likely you will increase your attractive value. If you present two attributes, you will need another encounter to present the others to ensure you leave them with a lasting impression. If you do not get the chance to, then you will have wasted your opportunity.
→ Indirect Contact – your indirect approach should demonstrate your complete package in various places and on social media.
CHAPTER 13: THE MAGIC OF FALLING IN LOVE
The Love Story
“I really enjoyed tonight,” Maria said. She had been standing on the landing of the steps to her apartment. “It’s too soon to ask him in. Even if I want to, I shouldn’t. If only he knew how powerless he makes me feel,” she thought.
It was another Saturday evening; a week had passed since their first date. Bruce had called Maria a few days prior. To Maria’s surprise, things had moved swiftly. Her rhythm of love had worked its charm. He could not get her off his mind. He stood on the sidewalk, looking up toward her. They had returned from a theme park.
“Oh, God, what is he doing?” she thought nervously. Bruce had placed his foot on the step. He wore a raincoat, where his hands had been tucked, and a hat casting shadow on his face.
“It’s getting late,” she said with a hasty tone.
Hushed and unhurriedly, he ascended the stairs. “He’s coming up. What should I do? I need an exit plan quickly.” She inhaled a deep breath, giving air to her throbbing heart. With barely enough time to gather her thoughts, his towering frame was already standing near her. “What should I do? I feel like running inside and shutting the door behind me.” Her knees had been trembling. She took a step back. “I am a grown ass woman. I got this. Don’t do anything silly, you don’t wanna lose him.”
It was nearly midnight. The landing was poorly lit. A gash of wind had whizzed by, shifting her dazzling green dress along. Bruce moved to her side to shield her against the breeze, whilst she pressed her dress against her thigh.
“I think it’s getting late,” she muttered. She kept facing straight down the stairs, keeping her eyes away from him. He drew his hand from his pocket, laid hold of her chin and turned her face towards him.
“It’ll only take few minutes,” he said with a rich and soothing voice. She could not help but turn her slender figure toward him.
“His voice. And that smell, it always gets me,” she thought as she faced his chest. His lengthy raincoat wrapping around her as it flapped.
The trees planted along the sidewalk hissed and rattled with the wind. The neighbouring apartments and passing vehicles added to the vibrant atmosphere. She placed her hand against his chest, lowered her eyelids, inhaled a deep breath and soaked up the moment.
Bruce moved her face upward. She could barely see his piercing eyes amidst the shadow. “He makes me feel so at peace and powerless. I’ve never felt like this before,” she thought. He shifted her hair behind her ear and gently caressed her cheek.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“I am admiring how beautiful you are.”
He held her chin as he reached down with his lips. The first kiss was brief. A peck that had lasted a few seconds. He pulled back and stared right at her. Her eyes had adjusted, and his eyes overwhelmed her. It was as if she had known him in another life. “I think I have really found him.”
He reached down for a second kiss, and it felt like an eternity. It was as if time stood still. Passing cars had frozen, the trees had been stiffened, and the noise from the apartments muted. The passion, the chemistry an
d the rush that she felt was magical and sensual. She placed both of her hands on his cheeks and held him for a little while before breaking free.
“I’m sorry, I have to go; I have to use the toilet. I’m sorry,” she said with an unsettled face.
She turned toward the front door of her apartment, dug in her bag and laid hold of her keys.
“Oh, God, why is my hand shaking so much?” She quickly opened the door, turned back and said, “I’m sorry I’ll call you.” She fought the urge of wanting to slam the door shut. “Oh, God, I can’t be around him anymore,” she said as she leaned against the door. Maria slid down and sat on the floor.
“I think I’m in love. It’s too soon.” She sat still, trembling and in awe of what had just happened. Half an hour later, she still had not got herself together.
A week later, Maria was in her apartment. She had returned from work. It was a Friday afternoon; the sun was setting beyond the horizon of the apartment balcony window. She threw her briefcase on the coffee table and sat on the sofa. “The week has been so long. Worst one in a while. Things had been going fine. I haven’t heard from him since. I hope he isn’t upset that I walked away from him,” she thought as she untied her shoes. “I will call him or else he’ll think I don’t care.”
She laid flat on her back, staring at the ceiling. “Why am I feeling guilty? I am worth the challenge. He has to see me as valuable. Maybe the way I walked away wasn’t elegant, but I couldn’t help it. I would have been all over him.” She sat up and continued, “I think it’s time. I’ll invite him over for dinner.”
Sunday evening arrived. The buzzer to her door had rung. Maria wore a cream silk dress hanging by a thin thread on her shoulders. The round table stood beside the balcony, set with candles, wine and the flowers he had given her.
“Hey, glad to see you,” she said as he opened the door. Bruce leaned forward and gave her a peck on the cheek.
“Glad to see you, too.” Bruce climbed the stairs behind her, with his eyes fixed on her hourglass-like figure. Maria had let down her hair; she was bubbly, playful and seductive.
He sat at the table as she served dinner. He was as attentive to her as he had been on the first date. She found it hard to resist his charm.
“When was your last relationship?” she asked.
“Well, a gentleman doesn’t tell.”
“Oh, come on, it is not fair, I tell you everything.” She had reached over and struck him on the shoulder. “That hurt, careful or you’ll send me to hospital,” he said smiling.
“Whatever!” She sipped on some wine while she scanned his broad shoulders, muscly arms and soft lips.
Bruce wore a burgundy coloured polo-shirt and some denim jeans. “He hasn’t looked at them even once. Doesn’t he like them? Maybe they are not big enough?” she wondered as she placed her hand on her cleavage. The dress revealed a fair display of her bosom.
“So, are you going to tell me?” she asked.
“Oh, you mean if I have dated a woman as beautiful as you?”
“You know what I mean,” she said with a stern look. She raised her glass; and took another sip while fluttering her eyelashes.
“Well, probably never. None of them compare to you.” He looked at her dead in the eyes. A surge of excitement, from the pit of her belly to the private places, stirred her desire. The response caught her off guard.
The tension between them began to build. Maria flicked her hair as she stood on her feet.
“I made a lovely dessert. Let me get it. By the way, what music are you into?”
“Any, as long as it’s not too wild.” Bruce stood up and continued, “I’ll help you clear the table.” Maria walked over to her living room, and she filled her home with some soulful music.
“I’ll be right back.” She spent some time pampering herself. When she opened the door, Bruce stood outside her bathroom.
“Oh, God. You scared me,” she said as she struck him on his broad chest. “What are you doing?” He moved towards her, grabbed her by the cheeks and passionately kissed her. She stood powerless, surprised and frozen.
But then, excitement came to her again, intensified tenfold. Maria hopped on his waist and wrapped her legs around him.
“Where is your bedroom?”
“I think we are moving too fast,” she replied as she stroked his hair. Bruce moved towards the wall, and he kissed her again. The passion, and the chemistry between them was off the charts.
“Does this feel too fast for you? Tell me and I’ll make my way home,” he said as he gasped for air. She was sweating and breathing heavily too.
“Why would you want to go?” she asked.
“Because I want you. Are you not my woman?” He had said the right words. Maybe a little too soon, but, the right ones, nonetheless. She felt the same, she was his and he hers.
“It’s that way.” She pointed. “Through the first door to your left.”
Bruce laid her on her queen size bed. They undressed each other, pausing in between each effort. The breaths became heavier, and the clothes fell on the floor. The long-awaited day had finally arrived. Bruce made love to her, like she had never felt before.
All through the night, till the break of dawn. It was worth the wait. She laid on his chest, as they slept through the morning.
CHAPTER 14: GETTING AN EX BACK
The Love Story
It has been six months since the first date. Bruce and Maria have been an inseparable item. They spend most of the weekend together; Maria would stay over at Bruce’s place and he would stay over at her apartment.
She had fallen deeply in love with Bruce. She had found the one for her, her knight in shining armour. Not an hour went by without her thinking or daydreaming about the time she spent with Bruce. Wherever she went, she would have Bruce in her thoughts. She would message Bruce in the morning, and afternoon and call him in the evening. He would reciprocate by reaching out to her, too.
As time went by Maria lessened her attention on things that gave her fulfilment and purpose in life. Her hobbies, interests and activities took backstage. She found little joy in them. They did not compare to what mattered to her the most. She devoted most of her free time to Bruce. After all, he was now the source of her happiness.
The inevitable day finally came, on the 20th of November 2012. “I think we need a break,” Bruce said as he broke the news to her. The words plagued her mind for weeks to come. The breakup occurred after six months of togetherness. Maria tried everything to get him back. She begged and pleaded. She tried to reason with him. She sent him heartfelt messages. And she even tried the mutual friend’s route to vouch for her. Nothing worked. Maria was left devastated and heartbroken. She called in sick for work. She spent Christmas alone. Her messy house, the darkness and the comfort of her bed became her companion.
The year had come to end, and though it had started as a gift from the heavens, a wish from the stars, it ended as the last one did. On New Year’s Day, Bruce was tagged with someone else in pictures. He seemed happy. He was accompanied by a gorgeous girl with hazel eyes and black hair. She sat on his lap while kissing him on the cheek. It was the final curtain call for Maria. All hope was lost.
Love Without A Rhythm
The art of seduction ignites the flames of love in the person you desire. The positive emotions you induce cause them to want you. Love without a rhythm is like fire without the fuel that keeps it burning and alive.
The fuel of love is the six attributes of seduction. They ignite and keep the passion of love alive.
Maria had forgotten that love has a rhythm. She felt that once she had gotten together with Bruce that just being with him was enough. She stopped doing things that made her attractive and valuable in the first place - the things that made Bruce want her. In doing so, she became needy, which made her predictable, unchallenging, unexciting, powerless, and inelegant. She stopped enticing him with who she is as woman. The person that he came to love and admire. There was nothing lef
t for Bruce to hold on to.
Maintaining Your Attractive Value
Once we are in a relationship, we develop a sense of ownership and comfort. We forget the reason the person chose to be in a romantic relationship.
To maintain your attractive value, you must:
Focus on things that give you a sense of fulfilment and purpose.
Utilise the six attributes of seduction to keep the passion of love burning.
Use the change and surprise strategy to breath excitement and unpredictable into the relationship.
How To Get An Ex Back
Getting the one you love back means starting afresh, leaving the history you both had locked in a box of the past.
Before you initiate contact there must be sufficient space so that any negative feelings or perception of you is replaced with positive memories. Time is your friend, so you must exercise patience and put in the necessary effort to rebuild your attractive value and self-confidence.
Take a few weeks to undertake the necessary changes so that you surprise them when you do make contact. But be mindful that they may be doubtful and may not be receptive. Nonetheless, maintain your goal of rebuilding your image and taking their sense of power away slowly but surely until you induce curiosity, and you ignite the feelings that they once had.
The Rhythm of Love Page 5