Tayrym (Galactic Defenders Book 4)

by Jessica E. Subject

  Sol turned around from his desk without Guri even saying a word. Lips tight, he got up from his desk and approached him, wrapping his arms around him. “I’m sorry.”

  Guri’s tears fell. He wanted to be strong, but his entire body felt weak. Including his heart and soul. He’d waited so long for a chance with Tayrym. But it was a hopeless dream.

  Sol held him tight against his chest, letting his tears pour out. Eventually, his hold loosened. “Don’t give up hope. Don’t give up on him. You have to understand—”

  “No.” Guri sighed and pulled away. “Holding onto false hope will only make it hurt more when I realize he’ll never be mine.”

  “Don’t.” Sol reached for him, but he jumped back.

  “He’s not Myar, so don’t expect us to work out because you and his brother were never given the chance.” Guri knew the words would hurt his housemate, but he needed him to stop trying to change his mind. Heading to his own room, he paused by the stairs. Below, a shadow loomed, visible through the small window in the front entrance. Guri shook his head, sure he’d imagined the figure, a figment of his still-hopeful imagination. But the person was still there. And then Guri heard a light tapping.

  As much as he wanted to rush to answer, Guri took his time. Just because he hoped it was Tayrym on the other side didn’t mean it was him. His hand shook as he reached for the knob.

  “Who is it?” Sol called from the landing.

  Guri didn’t answer, instead yanking the door open to find out for himself.

  Tayrym rocked back and forth, heel to toe, waiting for someone to answer. He was late, the sun having set long ago. But he hadn’t been able to leave any earlier, his mother requesting his help to tend the gardens at the palace. That was her contribution to the community in order to keep a home and get two shares of food. Tayrym didn’t have to work while still in school, but he did anyway, to allow his mother to arrive home at a decent time. But, Tayrym hadn’t finished until it was dark, and he’d still had to go home and clean up. If only he’d remembered to ask for Guri’s com tab number.

  Would Guri still be up? Or had he given up on him? Maybe he’d gone out with someone else who actually showed up on time.

  When the door handle clicked, he gulped. Would Sol answer then yell at him for being late?

  But instead of his teacher answering, Tayrym came face-to-face with his crush. Or more like face-to-chest. Guri’s shirt, though not the style he usually wore, was unbuttoned, giving Tayrym a wonderful view of Guri’s perfectly sculpted chest and abs. A sight he’d seen earlier in the day but didn’t think he could ever get enough of.

  “You’re late.”

  Tayrym peered past Guri to see his teacher at the top of the stairs.

  “I know.” He hung his head, afraid this was the end, that he’d blown any chance with Guri. “I was helping my mother and I couldn’t get here any earlier.”

  “Well, that works for me.” Sol left, disappearing somewhere on the second level.

  Alone with the guy he’d imagined moments like this with, Tayrym lost all courage, unable to lift his gaze from the ground. He twiddled his thumbs, trying to decide if the ylafats in his stomach were going to make an escape.

  “Hey.” Guri gently touched his chin. “Look at me.”

  And that’s when he noticed. Dried tear marks lined Guri’s cheeks, his eyes red and puffy.

  “I’m so sorry.” Forget the ylafats. Guilt chewed away at his gut. “I’m sorry for making you think I wasn’t coming.”

  Guri shook his head. “It doesn’t matter.” A small smile graced his. “You’re here now. Come in.”

  Attempting to keep up with his host’s fast-pace through the house, Tayrym examined the place as he followed Guri into the kitchen. The entire place was bigger than where he lived with his mom. Newer, too. When given the option, Tayrym’s mother had chosen to have their own dwelling repaired rather than move to a new one. She hadn’t wanted to leave behind memories of her husband or other son. Even though she forbade Myar’s name to be spoken in her presence. And Tayrym hadn’t been inside any other personal dwelling since the last invasion.

  Everything seemed so clean, bare. Empty. Like no one really lived there. He wondered if the rest of the house was the same, or if the two of them kept all of their cherished belongings in their own rooms. His cheeks warmed at the desire to see Guri’s room. To find out if it resembled what he’d imagined in his dreams.

  “Tay?”

  “Huh?” He squinted at Guri, leaving behind his fantasies for reality.

  “Would you like some mead?” His crush held up a mug, eyebrows raised.

  “Uh, no thank you. I don’t really like the taste.” He and his brother had snuck onto the palace grounds after an Allorama many Galactic years ago, and found mugs of mead left behind by royal guests. Tayrym had thought it was the best find until he tasted the liquid. It was worse than the old laundry water he’d accidently gotten in his mouth when having a splash fight with Gwenodyn. Even Galactic years later, when offered a mug from Bryce, the Defender he admired, his tastes hadn’t changed.

  “Okay.” Guri shrugged before putting the mug on the counter. “Would you like to go out back and watch the stars, then?”

  “Sure.” It was too dark to do much else outside. But perfect for searching for constellations in the sky and getting close to his date without having to worry about who would see them.

  “Wait.” Sol rushed into the kitchen.

  Tayrym turned around though he was sure Sol had meant his words for Guri.

  “Tay, Hakon wants to know if you can stop by his place tomorrow and take a look at his com tab.” Sol shook his head. “He can’t get it to work properly, and I’m afraid he’s going to break it before he can get a Defender to show him what he’s doing wrong.”

  Tayrym smiled. “Sure.” Many of the people on Hemera who used Alliance technology asked him to fix their coms. Something that came easy to him. If only athleticism came without difficulty.

  “Great!” Sol headed for the front door. “Well, enjoy your evening together.”

  Guri gripped the counter. “Wait! Where are you going?”

  “To Hakon’s to plan your graduation ceremony.” Sol winked in their direction. “You’ll be fine.”

  “Why does he have to be like that?” Guri said under his breath. He headed out the back entrance into the dark.

  Tayrym glanced back and forth between the two housemates. Had he done something wrong to cause the tension between them?

  Sol flicked his hands toward him. “What are you waiting for? Go out with him.”

  Laughing at himself, Tayrym rushed out the door. Nerves had made him hesitate, but he was there to see Guri, not his teacher.

  Outside, kitchers chirped all around and tappies peeped as they flew overhead. He found his date sitting on a blanket with his legs out in front of him, four lit torches around the edge providing a faint amount of light. “You planned this?”

  Guri shrugged. “I was planning to watch the sunset with you, but....”

  “I’m so sorry.” He’d ruined their night before it had even begun. Maybe he should have gone home instead.

  “It’s okay.” Guri reached up for him. When Tayrym took his hand, he pulled him down to sit by his side. “This actually worked out better.”

  Tayrym frowned. “Because no one can see us this way.”

  “No.” Guri lightly brushed his fingers over Tayrym’s knuckles. “Because we get to see multiple stars instead of just one.”

  A wave of courage swept through Tayrym. He enjoyed the contact but wanted more. He clasped Guri’s hand then paused, unsure how the other would react. “So, um.... You like star gazing?”

  “Yeah.” Instead of letting go, trying to break contact, Guri gripped his hand tighter. Sure, they’d kissed in the woods, but this simple contact meant so much more to Tayrym. Guri lay back on the blanket then rolled onto his side, never breaking their skinship. “I know it’s kind of impossible for us on Hemer
a, but don’t you ever dream about traveling among those stars, seeing what’s beyond our planet?”

  Smiling, Tayrym leaned over and kissed the top of Guri’s hand before lying flat to stare up at the stars. “All the time. Actually....” He would be traveling among the stars in a matter of day cycles. On his way to Kalara for Defender training.

  “What?” Guri reached over and stroked the side of his face. “Tell me what you were going to say.”

  “I....” He swallowed the sudden lump in his throat, his chest aching with regret. For the first time since he’d met Bryce, Tayrym didn’t know if he still wanted to be a Defender. “A couple day cycles after graduation, I’m going to be in space. I’m going to Kalara to become a Defender.”

  “Oh.”

  The simple word felt like a blade to Tayrym’s heart. He finally had a chance to be with his crush, but only for a short period of time. Not long enough to know if it could turn into something more. Unless.... “Hey, if you really want to travel through the stars, you could come, too. Train to be a Defender with me. I think you’d do really well.”

  “I don’t think so.” Guri let go of Tayrym then rested his arms behind his head. “That’s your dream, not mine. I want to go into space, but not like that.”

  Tayrym bit his lip, trying to divert the pain there instead of his heart. Just when he believed he had everything he’d ever wanted, he realized the impossibility of living both dreams at the same time.

  Silence filled the air. Even the creatures of the darkness seemed to sense the tension and grew quiet. As each moment passed, the ache in Tayrym’s chest grew stronger. Should he go home? Give up on Guri completely rather than face the pain of leaving him behind later on? He sighed. What did it matter? They really hadn’t had anything but possibilities. But not anymore. Only the memory of a couple of kisses. Pushing to his feet, he ignored the tear sliding down his cheek. “I should take off.”

  “What? No.”

  Tayrym turned to see Guri on his knees.

  “Please don’t. I mean....” He sat back down. “Unless you want to.”

  “No. I just thought, since you weren’t talking, that you wanted me to go.” Tayrym wiped away his tear. “But I guess I shouldn’t have dropped that information yet.”

  “No, I’m glad you did.” Guri patted the blanket beside him. “It’s better I know what to expect. But that doesn’t mean we can’t be friends?”

  Tayrym shrugged in disbelief. “Okay.” Friends wasn’t what he’d wanted. But he couldn’t expect much more. Any time spent with his crush would be better than being at home, pretending he was someone his mom wanted him to be.

  “So, I have a question,” Guri said as Tayrym returned to his side. “And I want to know the truth.”

  “Okay.” He’d never discussed his sexuality with anyone except that one moment with Gwenodyn, but figured he could trust Guri. He was the only person around who would truly understand.

  “Why does Princess Gwenodyn call you Scrym, but no one else is allowed to?”

  Tayrym gasped. Not at all the type of question he’d expected. And definitely not one he’d wanted to answer. But he’d told Guri he’d be honest. “Well, Gwenodyn and I have known each other since we were very young. So many Galactic years before Lalia returned.”

  Guri nodded, his intense stare consuming him. Yet Tayrym continued.

  “She looked up to me for some reason, followed me everywhere. The same thing I did with my brother, Myar.” He’d always admired his brother. Wanted to be just like him. And in many ways, he was. “His friends at that time didn’t like me hanging around. Used to always say ‘Scram Tayrym.’ Gwenodyn was so young at that time, and I guess she thought that was my name. She tried to say it all, but ended up shortening it to Scrym. She knows my real name, but called me the other for so long, it just stuck.”

  “Okay, I get it.” Guri nodded. “So, why don’t you call me ‘Raw’ like the rest of my friends?”

  Tayrym tried to figure out an answer. He’d never really thought about it. “I guess because we haven’t been ‘friends’ for that long.” He wanted to be more than friends with Guri, but with his impending departure date, that wasn’t possible. “And it’s their nickname for you. I feel awkward saying it.”

  “Okay, I understand.” Guri brushed the tips of his fingers along the side of Tayrym’s hand. “So if I call you Tay Tay, what do you want to call me?”

  He smiled. “Mine.” His cock stirred as he waited for Guri’s reaction.

  A deep laugh rumbled from Guri. He grinned before lying back and closing his eyes. “As much as I want that to be true, I don’t know if it’s possible. Not with you leaving in a few day cycles.”

  Tayrym tapped a finger against his bottom lip. Why did this have to be so hard? Why did they only now get together?

  “I know I said friends, but let’s give it a try. See where it goes.” Guri yanked Tayrym toward him.

  Not expecting the force, Tayrym tensed and fell face first into Guri’s chest. He pushed off the other while his eyes watered and his nose throbbed with pain.

  “I’m so sorry.” Guri sat up and pulled him onto his lap. “I didn’t mean for that to happen. Tay Tay, please tell me you’re okay.”

  Tayrym nodded, wiping his eyes. “I’m clumsy, and your chest is so hard.”

  Guri laughed then kissed his cheeks. “I’ll try to protect you.”

  Tayrym gazed with adoration at his date. If only he would be by his side forever. His admiration faltered when Guri caught his eyes, his focus devouring all of Tayrym’s thoughts.

  Heat flared across his cheeks and burned down his body. He couldn’t look away, couldn’t blink, so mesmerized by Guri’s dark, penetrating eyes. Peace and war together. He tried to speak, but his mouth went dry. Instead, he placed a hand on Guri’s cheek.

  The other grabbed his wrist. Before he realized what Guri had planned, Tayrym was on his back, his date straddling his waist and lips on his. He wrapped his arms around Guri, holding him close, deepening their kiss. Guri was confident, forceful, somehow very experienced. And Tayrym enjoyed every bit. Their tongues clashed together, battling for supremacy, but he let Guri have the lead. Guri kissed down his neck, sucking and biting as he went. Every nerve in Tayrym’s body sparked. His cock throbbed. Not from fantasies, but the real thing. The real Guri. And he wanted more. Grasping the other’s hips, he pulled him down while thrusting up. Euphoria.

  Guri moaned against his neck before lifting his head. “You shouldn’t do that. I...I can’t right now.” He rolled off Tayrym and onto his back. Clasping his hand, Guri kissed the back of it. “I really like you. A lot. But, this isn’t how I expected things to be.”

  Tayrym nodded and lightly squeezed his fingers. “I understand.”

  “I want to be yours, Tay Tay. I’m all yours. But, I can’t go any further until I figure things out.”

  “Okay.” Tayrym ran his tongue across his swollen bottom lip. He really hadn’t known what he was doing, had no plan, only went with the feeling, the needs of his body.

  “Let’s just watch the stars.” With his finger, Guri traced wavy lines up and down Tayrym’s arm.

  “Can I cuddle with you, then?” For as long as Tayrym could remember, he and his brother had shared a bed, Myar always on his side, and Tayrym curled up to his back. After his brother had been taken away, he’d found it hard to sleep alone, eventually using an extra blanket in his brother’s place.

  “Yes, of course.”

  Tayrym didn’t need any encouragement to tuck himself into the other’s side. But curling up to Guri felt different. Instead of finding comfort, he became more anxious. So when Guri fell asleep under the stars, Tayrym simply admired at him, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest, the way his lips would come together when he breathed out. And every now and again, his eyes would flicker right before he sighed. “Tay.”

  Chapter Three

  Dressed in a golden-yellow button-down shirt and black trousers borrowed from his ho
usemate, Guri stepped on the stage to receive his diploma. A piece of parchment that meant more to those in the audience than it did to him. He’d worked during the day so he could contribute to the household, and, with Sol’s help, finished his education at night.

  Hakon shook his hand before he moved to Sol for the same congratulatory greeting. His other friends cheered from the audience, but it was Tayrym’s wide smile and excited clapping that caught his attention. He waved at his boyfriend before returning to his seat in the row ahead.

  They’d decided on that title the second night they’d spent together. The second of many spent talking, touching, and tasting. Yet never crossing the boundary of full penetration to unite them body and soul. Guri simply enjoyed getting to know him in ways no one else ever had. Tayrym always left moments before the sun rose, rushing home to get ready for his last day cycles of school.

  Other students around their age were called up until it was Tayrym’s turn. Guri could barely contain his excitement. He had so many things planned to celebrate this accomplishment. Though it meant little to him, he knew Tayrym was excited about graduation, looked forward to his limited day cycles of freedom before he left the planet.

  Guri cheered as loud as possible as his Tay Tay received a diploma. And when Tayrym passed him with a shy smile on his way back to his seat, Guri couldn’t help but pull him in for a kiss. Nothing intimate like what they’d shared on his bed. Just a quick peck on the lips. But enough to silence the crowd.

  Realizing his mistake, Guri let go of Tayrym and sat down. Regardless of who already knew about their relationship, there was still shock among the audience, their whispered opposition growing louder and louder.

  Tayrym bolted back to his seat while Guri tried to make himself as small as possible. Yet that didn’t take the audience’s attention off them. Thankfully, Sol still had more diplomas to distribute.