Not for a Moment: One Moment, Book 3

by Toni J Strawn

  “Van.” She gasped as his mouth landed on her pussy.

  A ripple of sweat sheened her body. Her hips rose from the bed, and she tangled her hands in his hair. Van flicked his tongue across her clitoris, the slow pull and thrust of his thumb as it pressed into her depths. She came apart, everything drawing together for one exquisite moment of ecstasy.

  Van murmured soft words of encouragement as Jess quieted, his hands smoothing the curves of her body. Before the last aftershock faded, he came back up the bed and his mouth found hers. She tasted the tart sweetness of champagne mingled with her own musky flavor on his lips. Mixed with Van.

  Jess’s body responded and she pulled him to her.

  “Condom. Now,” she ordered.

  When he was sheathed, Van cradled her ass in his hands and slid all the way. Until nothing lay between them. Chest to chest, hips joined, legs entwined. He went deep, going hard, his mouth finding hers as she felt pleasure knot inside her again.

  “Harder.” The cry was wrenched from her.

  Van’s tempo increased. His balls slapping against her thighs, soft grunts of pleasure exploding from him every time his shaft wedged deep. Jess dug her nails into his buttocks, urging him on.

  Her control was gone, stripped away by the exquisite feel of his cock sliding inside her. Sweat dampened her crotch, the musky aroma of sex wrapping her in its sensual heat, sharpening the hard edge of her desire.

  “Ah. Fuck. Jess.”

  The world exploded around Jess for a second time. With a cry, Van collapsed and she held tight until the tremors receded and the air cooled. She let him lie there for a moment before pushing at him.

  “Heavy,” she murmured.

  He rolled to lie beside her, his breath still rough and uneven. He turned to her with a grin.

  “Pleased with yourself much?” Jess brushed her thumb across his satisfied smile.

  Van smirked. He tried to capture her under his arm but Jess ducked out of range, twisting up on her knees. It was her turn now.

  “Careful.” He sat up as she winced.

  Jess adjusted her position. Her teeth clicked together as irritation flared. “Oh, so it’s fine as long as you’re doing it.”

  Van’s smile faded and he shifted on the bed. There was something in his expression. Jess stared at him, her breath catching as the pieces tumbled in place.

  “Oh fuck. That’s it. Isn’t it?” She sat up, her eyes going wide. “You’re doing this on purpose.”

  “What?” Van tried for innocent, but the drop in his shoulders told Jess the truth.

  “Sexercise,” she spat out, glaring at him. “You’re controlling this. ‘You can take control in the bedroom.’ Bullshit.” She pointed her finger at his nose. “You’ve been controlling everything. Haven’t you!”

  Van flicked a gaze around the room as if trying to find an escape, then came back to Jess. He blew out a short breath.

  “To some degree,” he finally admitted.

  Anger bubbled up in her chest, her lungs burning. She scrambled off the bed, looking around for her clothes.

  “Don’t deny you haven’t enjoyed it.” Van grabbed at her arm, pulling her around to look at him. “What does it matter if we’re both having fun?”

  “That isn’t the point.” Jess wrenched free. She scanned the floor for her clothes, already regretting the wild abandon with which she’d lost them. In light of what she’d just found out, it seemed all the more humiliating.

  Where was her damn bra?

  Van crossed his arms, frustration written all over his face. “You want control? Take it. Take whatever you want.” His eyes glinted dangerously and he got off the bed. “I don’t give a shit who does what. I just want you. I love it when you scream out my name when you come. It turns me on. That’s why I like doing things to you.” Van breath was ragged and his stare drilled into her. “So, you’re right. I’ve been a selfish bastard. But, here’s your shot.” He lay on the bed and spread his arms wide, inviting. “What do you want to do to me?”

  Fuck. He was so damn hot. Jess tried to catch enough air to fill her lungs. Despite her anger, her pussy was wet, her nipples tight and tingling. Need scattered her thoughts. He was right. What did it matter? She enjoyed this, didn’t she? She got what she wanted out of it.

  Van.

  The temptation to give him back as good as she’d got was too much for Jess to step away from. With a shudder, she climbed up on the bed. She gripped his hair, staring down at him, trying to see the truth in his eyes. Van’s gaze never wavered.

  “Tell me what you want. I’ll do it. Whatever you want.” His tongue came out to touch his top lip.

  Jess tightened her hold, knowing it must hurt. She wanted him to hurt. “I don’t want any more of this control stuff,” she rasped. “I want you to fuck me like we’re equal.”

  “Then do it.”

  There was still a half a glass of champagne left. Jess grabbed it up.

  “My turn.”

  She doused her fingers in the bubbles, liquid running down her wrists as she brushed the tips of her fingers across his mouth. He let out a soft groan as her lips followed, licking and nibbling at his mouth. She sucked the flesh of his bottom lip between her teeth and bit down, hard, but not hard enough to draw blood. He lay still and Jess let go, licking the spot to soothe the hurt.

  She pulled back and swirled her fingers into the glass. Jess gave Van an arched look as she rocked back on her heels, liquid dripping while she pondered the sweet torment of where to dabble the champagne next.

  Van didn’t move. He appeared hypnotized as she drew lazy circles around his nipple. His breath caught. Jess traced a trail of glistening liquid over his rib cage, his skin taut under her touch. She hovered over him, her tongue teasingly close, wetting her lips. Flashing a wicked smile, Jess tipped the glass, allowing a small amount to dribble onto his stomach. Van cried out, catching her arm.

  “Uh-uh-uh,” Jess warned, letting the glass swing in her fingers. Champagne sloshed around the edges, threatening to spill. “It’s my turn, remember?”

  Van lay back, his gaze wary. Jess smiled, well aware he couldn’t work out what was punishment and what was pleasure. She loved that. With a thrill of victory, she lowered her mouth and felt him tremble as her tongue lapped, following the sparkling path across his skin. She wanted to tease and torment him, drive him as close to the edge as he’d driven her.

  She didn’t even get halfway down his body before Van erupted from beneath her. With a growl, he flipped her over, sucking the last of the wine from her mouth, his tongue tangling with hers on a low groan. He was close to losing control.

  “What are you doing?” Jess drew back. Although she knew. She’d always known.

  “You said you wanted us to fuck like equals. I need to fuck you. Now.” His breath rasped in and out, his hands roaming over her body like he didn’t know where to touch first. Yet he held back. Waiting for her answer.

  “Yes.” Jess squeezed the word out.

  It was all that was needed for Van’s leash to snap.

  “Condom. Now,” he ordered.

  His groan of satisfaction as he slid deep inside was everything Jess wanted. She might need Van.

  But he needed her too.

  * * * * *

  It was an eternity before Van could move again.

  Jess stirred beneath him and Van sat back, loving the feeling of her gaze sliding over him. She smiled and his heart started beating again at the simple gesture. He realized he’d been waiting to see it. He wanted her to be happy. With him. He wished she wasn’t involved with the clinic, or that he needed her so much…

  Van stopped to consider that thought and the truth hit him like a punch to the gut. If it came to the crunch, he would rather be with Jess than have her as a case study for his extension treatment. The realization was both devastating an
d liberating at the same time, and Van had the insane urge to laugh.

  It changed everything.

  Yet, it changed nothing.

  Van still needed to go home in a few weeks, even more so now he’d made contact with his mother. And he refused to make false promises, paint some abstract picture of a future they might have together when he knew he had to leave. He rubbed at his chest. The truth about how he felt about Jess would have to remain with him. She still had a long way to go in her recovery and he refused to give Jess any reason to think he had something to offer that he didn’t. Van respected her too much for that.

  “What now?” Jess’s head rolled to the side.

  “What did you have in mind?” The beginnings of his interest stirred. She did that to him.

  Her nose wrinkled. “Actually, I have to go. I’ve already skipped too many classes this week.”

  “Tease.”

  “If I was teasing, I’d say, you have the clinic to think of. Jayne will be expecting you,” she mocked.

  “Your loss.” Van stretched out, letting Jess see exactly what she was missing.

  “Been there. Done that.”

  She let out a squeal as Van lunged after her.

  “Roll on the weekend,” he growled in her ear. “I won’t be letting you out of my sight so easily.”

  “I’m yours from Saturday night,” she promised, her gaze softening. She wriggled against him, obviously enjoying the feel of being wrapped in his arms as much as he liked having her there.

  His heart stuttered, a streak of possessiveness jarring with the sweet thoughts he was having of Jess. He touched his hands to his chest, catching his breath.

  “What happened to Saturday? We still have work to do on your knee.” And he didn’t want to waste a minute of what little time he did have with her.

  Jess looked away. He sighed, wishing he’d shut up about her injury. If he was honest with himself, her knee had nothing to do with his need to see her.

  “I have things to do.”

  Van narrowed his gaze at Jess’s evasive answer. What was she up to?

  “But I have the house to myself tomorrow night,” she said brightly. “Do you want to come over? It will give me the home advantage.” She wriggled out of his hold, turning so she could clasp her hands about his neck, get in nice and close to his mouth. “It’s time to play the game my way.”

  Van leaned forward and brushed his lips against hers.

  “I like the sound of that,” he murmured. “But no more games. I’ve learned my lesson.”

  “Yes, but we all know you’re a slow learner.” Jess kissed him again, her tongue grazing his lip. “I think you need another demonstration. On Saturday night.”

  She sauntered out the door and into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Jess had gone all out to get ready for her date with Van. First, she’d gone for a walk, then done her exercises to iron out the last of the twinges in her leg muscles, until she felt supple and limber.

  Great sex was good motivation. She stifled a giggle at the thought. There would no giant cramps or seizures ruining this night—or couches. Madison’s two seater was definitely not up for the job.

  Jess had even taken some care in choosing what to wear, eschewing Madison’s well stocked wardrobe for something of her own. A bold red-and-white sheath dress that fell to the floor. Spaghetti straps emphasized her well-toned arms and golden skin. Underfloor heating meant Jess could leave her feet bare, although she adorned her ankle with a chain, linked with seven tiny silver stars.

  She looked good. The apartment looked great. So why did she feel so nervous about Van coming here?

  It wasn’t like it was his first time here after his grand entrance through her balcony door. This seemed different. More important. This time Jess had invited him and she felt vulnerable. Raw. Like she was laying herself open.

  She was blurring the lines, she realized. Once Van stepped across the threshold, he would be indelibly stamped on this place. No going back. Like the nurse who had refused to leave his work at the hospital, Jess would never be able to get away from Van…even when he was long gone.

  An ache tugged at her heart, her lungs constricting.

  The buzz of the doorbell kicked her pulse into an unsteady rhythm, even though Jess had been expecting it. She gave in to temptation and swiped damp hands down her thighs. Took a breath. Then lost it again at the sight of Van.

  His chest was the first thing she noticed, the lines of his pecs hugged by a metallic gray shirt that glinted in the light. His lips were curved upward into a welcoming smile and his hair was wet, like he’d just walked out of the shower and come straight here. Sexy as hell.

  He raised his brow at her frank appraisal. “Are you going to let me in?” Warm chocolate eyes sparked with a hint of darkness.

  Heat burned at her cheeks, but Jess stepped back, nearly tripping on the hem of her dress. Of course Van was right there to catch her. He shut the door behind himself and his arms were around her, his mouth brushing hers…

  And everything slipped into place as all of Jess’s nerves and anxieties melted away. She leaned in, her hands flattening against his chest, her legs weak, her head spinning. His tongue probed her mouth and she moaned, the heat of his hunger consuming her. Wet warmth flooded her sex, loosening her thighs while her nipples hardened into aching points as she rubbed against him.

  “Jess. Stop.” Van drew back, his breath a harsh rasp between his lips.

  “Why?” Jess was still lost in a thick cloud of desire and not about to let him get away so easily. His erection was a thick bulge in his jeans, evidence of how much he wanted this too, his nipples tight points poking at the fabric of his shirt. She slid back toward him, head tilted in anticipation of another lust-fueled kiss.

  “No.” Van stopped her with on hand on her shoulder, holding Jess at arm’s length. He shook his head as if to clear it. “I think the occasion demands more than me ripping your clothes off and taking you in the foyer.”

  “I like being taken in the foyer.” Jess pouted her displeasure. He was right, of course, but he didn’t have a clitoris throbbing out an SOS, eager for action. She touched her tongue to her lip, desperate for another taste, then forced herself to turn away.

  Damn it all. Tonight was important. And the fact Van recognized it—that he put some significance on it too… Jess kept her back turned so he wouldn’t catch how much that meant to her.

  Unfortunately, it did nothing to lessen the impact of her sexual attraction to him. And Van didn’t play fair. Jess bade him sit at the table, but he refused the seat opposite her, instead moving so they were adjacent to each other. He pressed his calf against hers, his hand brushing her fingers or her arm at every opportunity.

  Jess could barely concentrate on the lasagna, which had taken three painstaking hours to prepare, including an hour of cleaning while she’d chased flour and shreds of cheese around every nook and cranny in the kitchen. Jess had wanted everything to be perfect.

  And it was. Lingering touches became longer. Jess traced her fingers across the back of his knuckles as he rested his hands on the table. Her feet twisted together with his after he’d kicked his shoes off. Dinner was forgotten, wine virtually untouched. Each time her eyes met his, she felt like she was falling—deeper and deeper into a velvety pool.

  It was all going well, until Van brought up the idea of them going for the hike in the Appalachians on Saturday.

  “I still owe you a hike up to the tributaries,” he reminded her. “My dad used to take me and my brother camping around one of the smaller streams. We’d go out at night, hunting for eels and fireflies.”

  “You’re from around here?” Jess wasn’t sure why that surprised her. It felt like something she should have known. But then, he was only passing through…

  “Yea
h. My brother and I grew up in a small town just out of Cumberland. That’s how I know what you need to prepare for a hike in the mountains. Some places can be pretty wild, but I’d love to take you if you want to go.”

  Jess lifted herself from her maudlin thoughts to find Van watching her.

  “Where. Hiking? Hell, yeah.” Jess nodded. She had no doubts Van would be happy to take her hiking, not after some of the things they’d been up to in the last week.

  “So, Saturday then?” Van seemed keen to lock in a date.

  Jess bit back a sigh. “Uh, not Saturday. Unfortunately. I’ve already promised to do something else. But we can go Sunday.” Her smile was strained as she tried to gloss over her plans.

  Van’s shoulders dropped and he gave her a look, a sad, disappointed look that caused a pang of heartache in Jess’s chest.

  “We need to talk,” he said.

  Jess sat up straighter. She pulled her hands back from the table where they’d been flirting with Van’s fingers. Her heart started thudding dully as she played back the last hour. Nice dinner. Check. Flirting and touching. Check. Any signs of discontent? No.

  “That sounds ominous.” She gave a small, half-choked laugh. The lasagna sat like lead in the bottom of her stomach and she twisted her hands in front of her belly.

  “I’m sorry, Jess, but to be fair to you, I have to say this before we go any further.” He caught her gaze, regret thick on the air. “I know about your plans for Saturday.”

  He pulled a piece of paper out from his pocket and Jess’s gaze flicked down. The Mud, Sweat, and Tears flyer.

  “Is that all?” Confusion turned to relief and the air rushed from her lungs. “God, I thought it was something serious!”

  “This is serious, Jess. Tell me you’re not going to go through with this and involve your friends.”

  Relief became irritation at Van’s self-righteous tone. “How the hell did you find out about it anyway?” She narrowed her gaze. “It was Jayne, wasn’t it?” Jess rubbed at her arms, feeling the bite of betrayal.

  “She came to me for advice this afternoon. And she showed me the flyer. I guessed straight away who was involved.” His gaze bored straight into Jess and a chill crept across her skin. “She told me you’d practiced at the army assault course on Tuesday.”